A girl's perspective on boundaries

[sylvester the cat]

Girl went out with her friends last night. Got pretty trashed. She's telling me how her friend's man thinks she just went to her friend's house and chilled out. She didn't tell him that she was going out partying out of respect for his boundaries.

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[BrainDamage92]

Karma is a*****. It will come back at her sooner or later.

 

[Starwolf]

This isn't about the guy failing..

He has clearly set his boundaries and the girl knows about them

She is just a sh!tty human being who lies, eventually she will get caught and hopefully the guy drops her.

 

[No.Danny]

Apparently his filters are terribly broken or he likely set them mid-relationship like most idiots who do not understand boundaries.

... . this guy :crackup: :crackup:

 

[sylvester the cat]

so I'm trying to figure out how you are in a better position than that girl's boyfriend when both of your girls are out drinking and f****** around. the difference is that when he catches her doing it she's gone where as you are the frog in the boiling pot rationalizing away everything she does. which is exactly why we set boundaries to begin with to prevent rationalizations like that

She's not my girlfriend so it doesn't really matter.

 

[Harry Wilmington]

I think the more important issue is, why is her going out with friends and getting trashed being set as a boundary in the first place? It shows he's trying to "cuff" and control her over something dumb. Women have the right to go continue hanging out with their friends after getting into a relationship. Worse, he's trying to change something about her that was part of her personality prior to, and when they first, started dating. If he didn't want to date a girl that was going to go out and party/drink/whatever, he shouldn't have started dating her - as such, men need to learn to see a woman as she currently is (not what she COULD be) and decide if they can deal with it vs. telling themselves "eh, I can change her later."

 

[No.Danny]

I think the more important issue is, why is her going out with friends and getting trashed being set as a boundary in the first place? It shows he's trying to "cuff" and control her over something dumb. Women have the right to go continue hanging out with their friends after getting into a relationship. Worse, he's trying to change something about her that was part of her personality prior to, and when they first, started dating. If he didn't want to date a girl that was going to go out and party/drink/whatever, he shouldn't have started dating her - as such, men need to learn to see a woman as she currently is (not what she COULD be) and decide if they can deal with it vs. telling themselves "eh, I can change her later."

Shhhh don't post truthful knowledge. Danger doesn't accept facts, he's let the age and so called knowledge get to him. Oh please all mighty show me the ways

 

[zekko]

Girl went out with her friends last night. Got pretty trashed. She's telling me how her friend's man thinks she just went to her friend's house and chilled out. She didn't tell him that she was going out partying out of respect for his boundaries.

L
O
L

Two points:
1) What is this guy's boundary? That she isn't allowed to party?

2) One thing I fvcking DESPISE about this forum is how I can always count on being able to come here and read a post belittling some guy, some group of guys, some poor shmuck stupid boyfriend, or whatever. Posters here are constantly putting down other men here, especially men off the forum. I get the impression they do it because it makes them feel superior. I find it pathetic.

Believe it or not, #2 was not directed at you Sylvester, just making a general comment that I had to get off my chest.

 

[Skyline]

Girl went out with her friends last night. Got pretty trashed. She's telling me how her friend's man thinks she just went to her friend's house and chilled out. She didn't tell him that she was going out partying out of respect for his boundaries.

L
O
L

A girl who lies and gets "pretty trashed" often is generally a girl of low quality... If I were the guy, she would be doing me a favor by me dumping her for lack of integrity.

 

[guru1000]

Great! Eventually the guy will learn of this incident, and as his gf lacks character and cannot be trusted, he will have unequivocal justification to dump her. As you have failed to raise the bar high enough with laborious boundaries to test your gf's character, you are wasting time saddled in a potentially precarious relationship, while the subject guy will progress in his pursuits by seeking higher quality candidates.

BTW Sylvester a/k/a Smilie, were you not supposed to dump your gf a month ago for violating your personal boundaries of dramaless behavior and respect? I see time is a bottomless commodity to you. Perhaps, your original post, unconsciously, is a backwards rationalization not to dump your gf.

 

[No.Danny]

I could not agree with you more on NOT dating a girl who wants to constantly go out drinking.

But unfortunately you have been bitten by the blue pill brainwash drug where you should tolerate whatever behavior she desires or else you are controlllllling".

Men have the right and the obligation to expect that their gfs will conduct themselves in a manner befitting of a committed relationship. Having standards and expectations is NOT controlling...she can leave the relationship whenever she wants to and there is the door.

Unfortunately boys like danny are too indoctrinated and low value to realize their desires are equally as valid as their gfs.

I'll have one last post before I block your ignorant ass forever. All you're doing is spewing ignorant madness with no solid base. Calling me low value? :crackup:
All you do is continue to show your low value thread after thread. For someone in such a happy relationship able to demand sex at command you sure spend a lot of time here on us low value guys :crackup:
I wish I could be like you one day.

 

[:-)]

Great! Eventually the guy will learn of this incident, and as his gf lacks character and cannot be trusted, he will have unequivocal justification to dump her. As you have failed to raise the bar high enough with laborious boundaries to test your gf's character, you are wasting time saddled in a potentially precarious relationship, while the subject guy will progress in his pursuits by seeking higher quality candidates.

BTW Sylvester a/k/a Smilie, were you not supposed to dump your gf a month ago for violating your personal boundaries of dramaless behavior and respect? I see time is a bottomless commodity to you. Perhaps, your original post, unconsciously, is a backwards rationalization not to dump your gf.

Huh? What's that you say Danger?

A man would be thought a madman who professed an art which he did not know - Plato

 

[guru1000]

You took the bait Smilie: You post exactly 5 mins after my post (revised my post 9 minutes after to include your user id, "Smilie") in a thread allegedly not relating to you? Either you are Sylvester or you are stalking me, lol. Thanks for confirming my suspicion.

Yes, Bill Gates was a madman for pre-selling a product/idea he had yet to possess. Unfortunately, philosophers and moneymakers are antonyms.

 

[:-)]

You took the bait Smilie: You post exactly 5 mins after my post (revised my post 9 minutes after to include your user id, "Smilie") in a thread allegedly not relating to you? Either you are Sylvester or you are stalking me, lol. Thanks for confirming my suspicion.

Yes, Bill Gates was a madman for pre-selling a product/idea he had yet to possess. Unfortunately, philosophers and moneymakers are antonyms.

I'm stalking you.

You cannot serve both God and Mammon - the bible.

Say hi to Mammon from me.

 

[Trunks]

People are gonna do whatever they want. Setting boundaries at the beginning is your insurance so that she knows how it goes and you have no emotional qualms about dropping her if she fails. Eventually, any woman would get caught, unless you really are that naive, in which case hopefully you'd learn.

 

[:-)]

My message is simple. If you are entering an exclusive relationship then your woman should conduct herself in a manner befitting an exclusive relationship. It boggles the mind that any man would disagree with such a fair and simple concept.

Show where I disagree with what you say.

 

[No.Danny]

Another false dichotomy....if you get sex whenever you wish then you would never be helping other men get laid (or in your case 17 yo boy who is too ashamed or low value to get a woman who will choose you over disrespecting her relationship.

Milie,

You were proven to long ago that guru and I are not the same since we have had historical disagreements. But of course since you cannot refute the concepts of what we say then you revert to attacking the people.

My message is simple. If you are entering an exclusive relationship then your woman should conduct herself in a manner befitting an exclusive relationship. It boggles the mind that any man would disagree with such a fair and simple concept.

Where tf are you getting this information therefore being able to come to that conclusion. Oh there's right there's no possible way for you to prove that based on what you know of me. Shut the **** up you stupid uneducated tool.

 

[guru1000]

You cannot serve both God and Mammon - the bible.

Preselling a product/idea not in your possession with the intent to deliver and delivering--does not equal--preselling a product/idea with intent to deceive and not delivering.

Intellectually you understand this rudimentary distinction. Amazing what the ego will do to justify its failings--further explaining why you posted this thread, as you have failed to dump your gf for violating your boundaries because "boundaries are useless," lol.

 

[:-)]

explaining why you posted this thread, as you have failed to dump your gf for violating your boundaries because boundaries are useless, lol.

I am not in an exclusive relationship with anybody so I have no-one to dump.

Plus OP already said this:

She's not my girlfriend so it doesn't really matter.

You are making assumptions based on I don't know what.

 

[guru1000]

1. http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=224207

2. http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=224312

3. http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=224428

Somehow I doubt you had the fortitude to pull the next trigger.