Having been a "lurker" for a while I thought I would into myself now that I have actually posted. I am, by the boards definition the "ultimate afc". A late 30's high school teacher who basically never dates. The ultimate math/science geek and darn good at it. However, I pass for early 20's and so far every year the hottest of the hs chicks are after me. (as in telling their freinds they are gonna marry me, driving by my house, watching me,etc). This year, again, is no exception.
a brief intro
- Thread starter dakota
- Start date
comote,
In what situations I am confident is really irrelevant. " Being me" is something that is very difficult to be: Consider the stats: 37, no gf ever, still a virgin, do not drink or smoke, pass for low 20's, physically in good shape, to the area I live in very wealthy, secure job ( simply irreplaceable). My phrases and expressions are often immitated by others. A dynamic personality. My laugh instantly turns heads and generates reciprocal laughter. It is my choice to be as I am. I do not bother about introducing myself,- females do that themselves with their own "cold approaches". Oh sure sometimes I do, but mostly it is them. There is no real urge to "change", to conform to what is expected. Men need women to like them and to "succeed" with them because it gives value, purpose, confidence to the individual. Simply knowing that they want me is enough positive affirmation for me in most cases.
Perhaps some of you find this simply too unbelievable, but that is your choice.
In what situations I am confident is really irrelevant. " Being me" is something that is very difficult to be: Consider the stats: 37, no gf ever, still a virgin, do not drink or smoke, pass for low 20's, physically in good shape, to the area I live in very wealthy, secure job ( simply irreplaceable). My phrases and expressions are often immitated by others. A dynamic personality. My laugh instantly turns heads and generates reciprocal laughter. It is my choice to be as I am. I do not bother about introducing myself,- females do that themselves with their own "cold approaches". Oh sure sometimes I do, but mostly it is them. There is no real urge to "change", to conform to what is expected. Men need women to like them and to "succeed" with them because it gives value, purpose, confidence to the individual. Simply knowing that they want me is enough positive affirmation for me in most cases.
Perhaps some of you find this simply too unbelievable, but that is your choice.
Walden
Master Don Juan
Dude I love ya but if youre happy with where you're at and not interested in upping your game, shouldn't you be off posting on "ContentedMathematician.com" or something?
PuertoRican_Lover
Banned
You sound like a successful DJ to me except the girl part!
Girls want you but you don't want them??? Are you a homo? You can't approach? How are you an AFC?? We need details!!
Girls want you but you don't want them??? Are you a homo? You can't approach? How are you an AFC?? We need details!!
I concur with PRL - girls flock to you and yet you "can't" score with them? You're either too picky, too much of a good boy, or gay!
Ok, I'm being very rude and blunt, but let's break this down, figure out some of the angles, and get your dating life going. . .
Ok, I'm being very rude and blunt, but let's break this down, figure out some of the angles, and get your dating life going. . .
Lol,
No not a homo. Being a High school teacher in a small town the ones in school and the reccent grads are off limits. Even though I have survived persistant rumours that I slept with a couple of them a few years ago-- to actually do so would be a trainwreck waiting to happen. And yes, I am quite terrible at approaching. I am a high profile person were I live so people invaribly know me before I know them. More people know me than I know them. I run a sideline loan sharking business ( kinda slow right now- I need to collect) and have added friday night poker. In the summer the local high school kids come over to my house to "hang out" in the evening. ( Still think thats wierd- ya hang out with your teacher in the summer?).
My life is really funny sometimes. There is a reccent (for the area) hb9/10 new student in one of my classes. The senior high school quarterback/basketball star who sooner or later gets all the girls has been after her like crazy... meanwhile she is constantly initiating kino with me or saying things like "dakota, I like bannanas". Of course she is only 17 and I am not an idiot....and yes.. i am to much of a good boy.... in the end I ALWAYS "do the right thing".
No not a homo. Being a High school teacher in a small town the ones in school and the reccent grads are off limits. Even though I have survived persistant rumours that I slept with a couple of them a few years ago-- to actually do so would be a trainwreck waiting to happen. And yes, I am quite terrible at approaching. I am a high profile person were I live so people invaribly know me before I know them. More people know me than I know them. I run a sideline loan sharking business ( kinda slow right now- I need to collect) and have added friday night poker. In the summer the local high school kids come over to my house to "hang out" in the evening. ( Still think thats wierd- ya hang out with your teacher in the summer?).
My life is really funny sometimes. There is a reccent (for the area) hb9/10 new student in one of my classes. The senior high school quarterback/basketball star who sooner or later gets all the girls has been after her like crazy... meanwhile she is constantly initiating kino with me or saying things like "dakota, I like bannanas". Of course she is only 17 and I am not an idiot....and yes.. i am to much of a good boy.... in the end I ALWAYS "do the right thing".
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Ok, so your the big man in a small town and the women that are interested in you are off limits. You say you are content just knowing that women are interested(i actually do understand this). Is your goal to date somebody, date multiple somebodies, find a wife or is it to just tell everyone here that hot girls that you can never move on are interested in you.
thanks guys.
Answering a couple Q: the school district is actually quite big ( and empty). The nearest city is an hour drive away, making it impossible during the week for any nightlife without being tired as heck during work the next day ( not a good idea when dealing with students). As for my goal? comote...would be to date somebody, in long term wife. I have lurked for a while, partially because I have myself tried to move from the "soap opera" life of my past and did not want to bring it up, but it is part of me and always somehow comes back anyways.
btw:since I finally am posting: My own tip: Whenever you go to a restaurant were they an employee holds the door open for you.. when leaving try tipping the "doorgirl".. just a 1$ will do, as you walk out the door. My field test of this got amazing results. Upon the second time at the same restaurant ( same girl) my buddies who followed behind me said the gal was just beaming from ear to ear. As i walked out towards my car and glanced back she began waving at me. Of course being me I did not follow up. Still its only a 1$. They are not used to this and it speaks of a bit of "old school" sophistication that one never sees today. Try it.
Answering a couple Q: the school district is actually quite big ( and empty). The nearest city is an hour drive away, making it impossible during the week for any nightlife without being tired as heck during work the next day ( not a good idea when dealing with students). As for my goal? comote...would be to date somebody, in long term wife. I have lurked for a while, partially because I have myself tried to move from the "soap opera" life of my past and did not want to bring it up, but it is part of me and always somehow comes back anyways.
btw:since I finally am posting: My own tip: Whenever you go to a restaurant were they an employee holds the door open for you.. when leaving try tipping the "doorgirl".. just a 1$ will do, as you walk out the door. My field test of this got amazing results. Upon the second time at the same restaurant ( same girl) my buddies who followed behind me said the gal was just beaming from ear to ear. As i walked out towards my car and glanced back she began waving at me. Of course being me I did not follow up. Still its only a 1$. They are not used to this and it speaks of a bit of "old school" sophistication that one never sees today. Try it.
OK Dakota a few more questions:
One: The city that is an hour away, about how many people live there?
Two: What do you see as your best avenue for meeting potential women to date?
Three: What sort of things do you do for fun?
Four: Do you have any good friends that could function as wingmen?
One: The city that is an hour away, about how many people live there?
Two: What do you see as your best avenue for meeting potential women to date?
Three: What sort of things do you do for fun?
Four: Do you have any good friends that could function as wingmen?
answers:
1. about 60,000
2. my best avenue for meeting potential women? work on connections at pow wows.
3. for fun I work on my house and yard, go to pow wows in the summer. ( yes, i know..but I like to do those things)
4. no great choices in the wingman department.
btw: just to clarify: i am a white guy.
1. about 60,000
2. my best avenue for meeting potential women? work on connections at pow wows.
3. for fun I work on my house and yard, go to pow wows in the summer. ( yes, i know..but I like to do those things)
4. no great choices in the wingman department.
btw: just to clarify: i am a white guy.
Aztec
Master Don Juan
You definitely have good things about you. YOu just have to take risk in approaching chicks, although I'll have second thoughts about those youngins.
60,000, that's rough but it may work for you since you don't live there. Your situation seems pretty tough actually. Having lived in rural, suburban, and urban areas I have found rural areas to be much harder for me to dj in(and urban areas are the easiest). But that's for me. What I would do is either move to a different area or try internet dating. I have picked up salsa dancing and that is a great avenue to meet women. Maybe you could try to go Contra dancing. That seems to be pretty popular in rural areas and it is a great low pressure way to meet new women.
The hardest part about your situation for me would be that you are just not able to meet new women on a consistent basis.
Maybe some of our older DJ's from the rural areas can give you some better advice than I can.
I don't really know what it is like to be in a small town, but don't you usually get set-up or something? If everyone knows you are single and looking, they the set-up may be the easy way to get past the 'approach' problem - a date is better than no date!
Have you thought of moving or working elsewhere, like a temporary transfer? If the surrounding sucks, change your surroundings.
Have you thought of moving or working elsewhere, like a temporary transfer? If the surrounding sucks, change your surroundings.
Ok, so what's the deal?
You have high school chicks, you have recent grads... So where are the ones that graduated 5,10,15 years ago? Is it that they all get married and move out of the sticks?
best piece of advice I can give you is: don't worry if most of these 'women' know you before you know them! You're single, attractive, and you're looking right? LET IT BE KNOWN! It sounds like you've got 75% of the work cut out for you. Why? Because YOU ARE THE PRIZE, DAKOTA!
Get to know all these women that know you, they've got friend no doubt, so start networking. Imagine: word gets out that Dakota is finally out looking. The girls will be lining up!
Cheers mate.
You have high school chicks, you have recent grads... So where are the ones that graduated 5,10,15 years ago? Is it that they all get married and move out of the sticks?
best piece of advice I can give you is: don't worry if most of these 'women' know you before you know them! You're single, attractive, and you're looking right? LET IT BE KNOWN! It sounds like you've got 75% of the work cut out for you. Why? Because YOU ARE THE PRIZE, DAKOTA!
Get to know all these women that know you, they've got friend no doubt, so start networking. Imagine: word gets out that Dakota is finally out looking. The girls will be lining up!
Cheers mate.
morning thoughts and comments before heading off to the HS.
I actually like the area, I have put much time and effort into the house and yard which I rent from the school at the absurd rate of 100$ a month. As to were the ones are 5-10-15 years ago... already married with at least a few kids in most cases. Or at least a few kids. Here in rural north dakota the population is crashing and getting older. The exception is the native americans ( were I live). They are getting younger as they are reproducing at a very fast rate. ( lots of kids having kids).
Anyhow, I nust be off ....
I actually like the area, I have put much time and effort into the house and yard which I rent from the school at the absurd rate of 100$ a month. As to were the ones are 5-10-15 years ago... already married with at least a few kids in most cases. Or at least a few kids. Here in rural north dakota the population is crashing and getting older. The exception is the native americans ( were I live). They are getting younger as they are reproducing at a very fast rate. ( lots of kids having kids).
Anyhow, I nust be off ....
parisaga
Don Juan
This thread totally confuses me...
dakota are you actually looking for advice? Or just trying to feel better about your situation?
Reason being, everybody already posted everything. Sounds to me like you walk up to any random chick in your town and you'll be in the sack w/i 5 minutes.
Are you just scared a bit still being a virgin?
The first time WILL suck... no matter what...
dakota are you actually looking for advice? Or just trying to feel better about your situation?
Reason being, everybody already posted everything. Sounds to me like you walk up to any random chick in your town and you'll be in the sack w/i 5 minutes.
Are you just scared a bit still being a virgin?
The first time WILL suck... no matter what...
parisaga,
I am actually neither looking for advice nor trying to feel better about my situation. ( I like my life!) Simply, having lurked for a while I finally posted. Felt that I should intro myself. People then proceeded to give me advice, and I appreciate it, but it is really not necessary. My "current status" is my choice. I have a flight with a 6 hr layover in Minn-st paul this saturday and will take the opportunity to check out the mall of america - people I will never see again- so to "see" I will make a yet to determined number of approaches. Just for fun.
I am actually neither looking for advice nor trying to feel better about my situation. ( I like my life!) Simply, having lurked for a while I finally posted. Felt that I should intro myself. People then proceeded to give me advice, and I appreciate it, but it is really not necessary. My "current status" is my choice. I have a flight with a 6 hr layover in Minn-st paul this saturday and will take the opportunity to check out the mall of america - people I will never see again- so to "see" I will make a yet to determined number of approaches. Just for fun.
PuertoRican_Lover
Banned
From Dakota to Minnesota - you are making progress! When you return to the woods I recommend you pursue an 16-18 yr old virgin!!
