4th date at the weekend still no kiss. wtf.

[bunjy]

Ive been dating this hot chick for about 5 weeks now. Been out on 3 dates already, it seemed to be going fairly well. Throughout our dates Ive been using plenty of kino and generally playing good game (teasing, eye contact and flirting etc). She has been receptive, laughs a lot and generally seems to be having a good time. Problem is each time Ive gone in for a kiss shes turned away. First date It was a little peck on the cheeck, which was fine. Second I went in for a kiss at the end of the date and she turned away and just pecked my cheeck. Third I did the same and got a peck on the lips but nothing significant.

Now im left a bit confused really. Shes showing typical signs of interest, regular txting, good body language, plenty of eye contact etc. Shes even started asking me on dates (e.g. our upcoming date). But Im starting to get a bit bored now because I feel as if I may be wasting my time with this chick. Im not sure If shes maybe just dating me out of boredom of something, Ive ran all my best game and usually by this point Ive got a chick all over me but this one seems to be holding back.

We have a fourth date in a few days and Im not really sure what to expect or how to play this. Sure Ive enjoyed the challenge and its been good fun but now I kinda feel like giving up tbh. Sure she is a shy girl and may want to take things slowly (which is fine) but im a physical guy and like to have some physical signs of interest.

Ive never dated a chick who was so withdrawn. Opinions??

 

[Thorninmyside]

I'd flake the fourth date personally just to let her know my life's ambition is not to pursue her or be ****ed around. I wouldn't offer an alternative date. I'd just say I can't do it and see if she's goes into chase mode. Let her beg you for a reschedule, or she's really not interested in being escalated.

 

[PokerStar]

the one technique I used and it worked several times is the "how on a scale from 1 to 10 how would you rate your last bf kiss?"

This usually triggers something in their head that would make them try to compare them to you.

its not a 100% kiss close because nothing is 100% but if you want to find out an where you stand with this girl. now is the time to find out.

 

[bunjy]

I'd flake the fourth date personally just to let her know my life's ambition is not to pursue her or be ****ed around. I wouldn't offer an alternative date. I'd just say I can't do it and see if she's goes into chase mode. Let her beg you for a reschedule, or she's really not interested in being escalated.

Generally shes played hard to get to some extent. I have had to work but she has definitely shown me signs of interest (indeed she even told a mutual friend that she thinks im 'great'). I did flake myself on our last date (I had other arrangements and was genuine). Ive generally been fairly nonchalant about seeing her but have shown enough interest. After I pulled back abit she was chasing me quite a bit.

Generally theres been a bit of chase from both sides. Im confident if I flaked at the weekend she'd seek to rearrange. My point is that Im at a crux where Im tired of the chase with her now and bored of it all, she either needs to show me some phyical interest or I might have to next her. In short, my interest level has dropped and it rapidly declining.

Im thinking I might just put her on the backburner anyway. I will go all out on our next date, run my usual game and go for a kiss. If she pulls away again I'll play it cool and then backburner her and see what happens.

 

[bunjy]

the one technique I used and it worked several times is the "how on a scale from 1 to 10 how would you rate your last bf kiss?"

This usually triggers something in their head that would make them try to compare them to you.

its not a 100% kiss close because nothing is 100% but if you want to find out an where you stand with this girl. now is the time to find out.

Thats a pretty good technique really. I might try it! Im quite physical anyway and no no problems going in for a kiss with women its just Im not used to such a level of 'holding back'.

Im absolutely at a point where I need to know where I stand. Ive even considered just telling her!!!! Its a kinda weird situation because it feels like the shoe is on the other foot, shes clearly interested in me but she actually ruining her chances through lack of action or being unreceptive.

 

[PokerStar]

to get her you must be prepared to lose her.

 

[bunjy]

to get her you must be prepared to lose her.

Thats the irony, I am prepared to lose her. At at a point where Im not even bothered anymore. A part of me cant even be bothered to see her again.

On the other hand, I do feel abit like it would be a shame if we went our separate ways because we do have a good time together and get on really well. Its her lack of physical interest that is putting me off. Shes blowing her chances with me!!

Admittedly I have still chased and show a consistent degree of interest however. Maybe its time to just backburner her and see how it plays out.

 

[The_411]

You said it yourself you are bored and frustrated so you need to express those feelings in a way that shows you aren't interested unless things proceed. Eitehr she's being extremely careful, she's got issues with being burned, she's trying to escalate her value with the no sex game, or she's not interested.

Agreed that flaking and forcing her to chase is the way to go, unless you haven't doing something correctly with your escalation.

 

[apprenticedj]

I'd flake the fourth date personally just to let her know my life's ambition is not to pursue her or be ****ed around. I wouldn't offer an alternative date. I'd just say I can't do it and see if she's goes into chase mode. Let her beg you for a reschedule, or she's really not interested in being escalated.

I'd go with Thorny here, her interest isn't really there possibly because it's been easy for her. I'd say turn the tables on her and show her some low interest. Her reaction will speak volumes for where you two are in the game.

 

[El Payaso]

I've gone out on dates with a girl like That before. It ended up nowhere and I just ghosted on her after the 4th date. Try pushing hard for a proper kiss and/or f-close. If you're unsuccessful, just next her.

 

[_sideways_]

Mauser with the +1 rep

 

[Harry Wilmington]

What Mauser96 said. In addition: one time I met this girl (a younger intern my aunt worked with) and after spending most of the day together, I went in for the kiss at the end of the date. I found out from my Aunt later that she had found it awkward (even though she didn't push me away), so the next time I saw her, I told her I could wait until she was more comfortable to kiss her. We went on 4 dates where I didn't do anything more than a polite hug at the end of the date. On date 5, we were driving someplace when she asked me to pull over on the side of the road. When I did, she pulled my face in and kissed me right smack on the lips! Go figure, right?

Is me telling you this story my way of saying you should wait it out? Not really. While that experience did happen, I have found most girls since then are ready to kiss me by date 1 or 2, and if they're not it's usually not worth my time. If you're liking this girl and everything seems to be going well aside from the kiss, I'd follow what Mauser96 said; in addition, when she hits you up and asks to go out, make sure you're not paying for her - heck, say your funds are short and is it cool if you go dutch. Point being, until she kisses you, there's no point in you spending money on her. At this point, the LESS you try to do, the MORE she'll be in her head about your interest in her; and - assuming she has an interest in you - she's going to have to do something about it...

 

[VladPatton]

The guys have it right...start flaking on her and test her interest, this chick wants a girlfriend with a penis.

 

[JNil]

Dude fvck that, grab her face, with both of your hands(one on each cheek),
and kiss her hard.

If she rejects that sh1t, then you know its not worth it.

 

[mustfirstregister]

Thats the irony, I am prepared to lose her. At at a point where Im not even bothered anymore. A part of me cant even be bothered to see her again.

On the other hand, I do feel abit like it would be a shame if we went our separate ways because we do have a good time together and get on really well. Its her lack of physical interest that is putting me off. Shes blowing her chances with me!!

Admittedly I have still chased and show a consistent degree of interest however. Maybe its time to just backburner her and see how it plays out.

Don't lie to yourself. You are not prepared to lose her. I can tell because you were inpatient waiting for other guys to answer your post. Also In 30 mins you did 4 posts.


Maybe she doesn't trust you.

 

[Rival]

If you don't kiss her after the 4th date, she's just not that into you, maybe she likes you buying her things. At the end of the night just walk her to her car and grab her and kiss her, if she turns away, Cut that ***** off

 

[nismo-4]

Shy my ass.

She just likes you as a friend. If you go for the kiss and she rejects it, you need to walk away.

A girl wouldn't be shy if Channing Tatum asked her out on a date. She would know that if she doesn't kiss him on the first date, he'll be with another woman soon after.

 

[zinc4]

I don't even go on a second date if there is no kissing on the first...op..You are doing it wrong...always next uninterested chicks....4 dates abd no kiss...I couldn't imagine even having the patience that you do...

 

[marmel75]

It's your fault. Wtf do you mean no kiss?? If you want to kiss her stop being a p*ssy and kiss her like a man.

SMFH...make a move already

 

[bunjy]

It's your fault. Wtf do you mean no kiss?? If you want to kiss her stop being a p*ssy and kiss her like a man.

SMFH...make a move already

Well I did, on date three I went right in for a smacker. She pulled away, was really awkward.