3 Questions in 3 situations. Help appreciated.

[Aspiring1]

Hey, I've been mostly taking a break from dating and I am just now trying to start getting back into it. Help on a couple situations would be appreciated.

Situation 1: Saw a girl I knew at a bar. Flirted with her and her friend she was with. The friend was giving me HUGE signals. The girl I knew already was giving me perfectly adequate signs of interest, though less than her friend. Both were clearly interested enough for me to follow up. Both are less attractive than me, though still pretty cute. The girl I already knew is one I see a few times a year as a natural matter of course. I know a member of her family very well, and will be seeing that family member very often. Both gave me their numbers. I'm more interested in the girl I already knew.

Question 1: Do I call both? Would this be seen as really bad by the girl or her family member? I'm not the type to screw over women and it really isn't a good idea here anyway. I don't know how well the two know each other. What happens if I hook up with one and make a date with the other?

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Situation 2: Got a girl's number after meeting her through friends. She lives an hour away. Got the number like 2.5 weeks ago, but didn't call due to several reasons, a few of which were out of my hands (long, annoying story). Also, I didn't know what do say. Can't very well ask a girl out for a quick cup of coffee when she lives an hour away. She was going to be in town for an event we were both going to be at, but she didn't show up when her friends cancelled.

Question 2: I have nothing to lose by calling, but I don't know if it is even worth it. What do you say to a girl who lives an hour away? Hit me up if you are in town and I'll take you out? I generally try to start with a casual, quick date, which isn't in the cards here.
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Situation 3: Flirted with a girl I see once a week who was showing interest and got her number 6 months ago. Called her, but she was visiting her long distance BF when I called. Invited her to something a week later, but she didn't show interest. Recently, she has been giving me the eye again and talking to me often. I deleted her number when I learned she had a BF. I'm not hung up on her or anything, but I still have some interest.

Question 3: Since I already asked her out, I'd feel like a doofus doing it again, especially if she is still seeing the BF. Do I try to figure out if she is seeing him and ask her out again if she isn't? Do I just keep flirting and see if she makes herself available?


Situation 1 is pretty immediate and I'd appreciate any answers. Thanks for the help!

 

[bigneil]

In situation 1, getting numbers of two women who are together is dangerous and you may have already blown it. I did that once and it's one of my top 5 regrets in dating (it cost me a 9 when I tried to throw in her friend who was an 8). When I emailed the 9 she quickly wrote "Why did you ask my friend for her number?" I couldn't undo the damage. Plus the guy I was with liked her and it messed it up for him, but either both girls like you or neither do so it happens. Or, when you get both numbers they might only like you as a friend so neither is even jealous.

In situation 2, it's over. 2.5 weeks later and one hour away and she won't remember who you are, and that breaks the 50 mile rule.

In situation 3, you're talking about some girl who blew you off 6 months ago who has a BF? You seem desperate. She is only good if you run into her drunk some Saturday at 1AM and she flirts with you. Remember, her fantasy guy is someone she blew last year, not someone she blew off last year.

 

[runner83]

Hey, I've been mostly taking a break from dating and I am just now trying to start getting back into it. Help on a couple situations would be appreciated.

Situation 1: Saw a girl I knew at a bar. Flirted with her and her friend she was with. The friend was giving me HUGE signals. The girl I knew already was giving me perfectly adequate signs of interest, though less than her friend. Both were clearly interested enough for me to follow up. Both are less attractive than me, though still pretty cute. The girl I already knew is one I see a few times a year as a natural matter of course. I know a member of her family very well, and will be seeing that family member very often. Both gave me their numbers. I'm more interested in the girl I already knew.

Question 1: Do I call both? Would this be seen as really bad by the girl or her family member? I'm not the type to screw over women and it really isn't a good idea here anyway. I don't know how well the two know each other. What happens if I hook up with one and make a date with the other?

Did they both know they gave you their numbers?

Personally, if her friend is showing more interest and she is still cute, I'd start with her and see what happens.

If it doesn't work out, then try the one you know, although you said she wasn't showing as much interest.

If you only see her a few times a year, shouldn't matter a sh!t to you what she thinks of you hooking up with her friend if that happens.

Situation 2: Got a girl's number after meeting her through friends. She lives an hour away. Got the number like 2.5 weeks ago, but didn't call due to several reasons, a few of which were out of my hands (long, annoying story). Also, I didn't know what do say. Can't very well ask a girl out for a quick cup of coffee when she lives an hour away. She was going to be in town for an event we were both going to be at, but she didn't show up when her friends cancelled.

Question 2: I have nothing to lose by calling, but I don't know if it is even worth it. What do you say to a girl who lives an hour away? Hit me up if you are in town and I'll take you out? I generally try to start with a casual, quick date, which isn't in the cards here.

Probably a waste of time unless you can get her to come to you. A few flirty texts (NOT CALLS) to gauge her level of interest (whilst costing you next to no time investment) would tell you more about whether it is worth pursuing or not.

If she is interested big time and play your cards right, you might be able to get her to come stay with you for the weekend, but this is unlikely unless your game is awesome and/or she's really interested.

Situation 3: Flirted with a girl I see once a week who was showing interest and got her number 6 months ago. Called her, but she was visiting her long distance BF when I called. Invited her to something a week later, but she didn't show interest. Recently, she has been giving me the eye again and talking to me often. I deleted her number when I learned she had a BF. I'm not hung up on her or anything, but I still have some interest.

Question 3: Since I already asked her out, I'd feel like a doofus doing it again, especially if she is still seeing the BF. Do I try to figure out if she is seeing him and ask her out again if she isn't? Do I just keep flirting and see if she makes herself available?


Situation 1 is pretty immediate and I'd appreciate any answers. Thanks for the help!

How are you going to make contact with her if you deleted her number. Only option is if you meet up with her in person, try to get her alone away from anyone who knows she has a boyfriend, and tease her and see what happens.

Half the time it doesn't matter if she has a BF, especially if it is some pvssy who is in a long distance (i.e. read fake) relationship.

 

[Aspiring1]

In situation 1, getting numbers of two women who are together is dangerous and you may have already blown it. I did that once and it's one of my top 5 regrets in dating (it cost me a 9 when I tried to throw in her friend who was an 8). When I emailed the 9 she quickly wrote "Why did you ask my friend for her number?" I couldn't undo the damage. Plus the guy I was with liked her and it messed it up for him, but either both girls like you or neither do so it happens. Or, when you get both numbers they might only like you as a friend so neither is even jealous.

In situation 3, you're talking about some girl who blew you off 6 months ago who has a BF? You seem desperate. She is only good if you run into her drunk some Saturday at 1AM and she flirts with you. Remember, her fantasy guy is someone she blew last year, not someone she blew off last year.

I didn't ask either one for their number, they both gave them to me. The friend's interest was about an 9, while the girl I knew seemed pretty high as well, and texted me the next day.

For the third, I'm not desperate, I closed the book on her 6 months ago and deleted her number. I just see her often and she has started acting interested. I asked her out and she had a BF last year. I am trying to figure out the best way to capitalize if her situation has changed. My interest is not that high on her, to be honest.

 

[Aspiring1]

Did they both know they gave you their numbers?

Personally, if her friend is showing more interest and she is still cute, I'd start with her and see what happens.

If it doesn't work out, then try the one you know, although you said she wasn't showing as much interest.

If you only see her a few times a year, shouldn't matter a sh!t to you what she thinks of you hooking up with her friend if that happens.

Do you think it would blow up in my face if I made a date with both of them? Probably so, huh? The friend seemed to be in guaranteed hook-up interest level but I would rather date the one I knew already. Probably neither would be for the long-term.