17 year old waitress in a bar.

[Styr]

Actually, the worst thing would be (false) sexual harassment accusations.

Very unlikely it would happen here (in Estonia). Our society has not gone full woketard (yet).

 

[pipeman84]

She also told me when she will be working the next time, and when she gave us our receipts, she had written "until the next time, (and my name) ".

This all seems like an open invitation to ask her on a date, etc. But, I am 39 myself (albeit some people say I look 5-10 years younger), and she is just 17. What would you do in this situation? I obviously like the girl, and she has shown more grown up behavior than I have seen i some girls in their mid 20s and 30s. But the age difference, and especially that she is still 17, is a bit worrying... though I am pretty sure she will turn 18 soon.

Or is she just friendly? Because I tend to tip on the higher side.

It seems obvious to me from OP that she was just practicing her customer relations skills. I also find it fascinating how almost every move she made has been misinterpreted as flirting.

So I just saw the girl in the bar. She brought me my coffee, I asked her number, she said no (seemed to be flattered, though/obviously).

Naturally.

 

[BergischerLöwe]

I’ve been preying on young waitresses, clerks, baristas… for decades.

How do you go about approaching them? I've seen countless times where guys on forums advise others not to approach waitresses or cashiers. Last year in my own life there was a really cute cashier that I always saw when I went to the store, but didn't even think of trying to actually game her due to the aforementioned. It seems like such a risky thing to actually do unless you're able to routinely pull women anyway. I myself can't approach women irl no matter who they are so for me to try something like that would most likely be useless

 

[Hamurabimbi]

How do you go about approaching them? I've seen countless times where guys on forums advise others not to approach waitresses or cashiers. Last year in my own life there was a really cute cashier that I always saw when I went to the store, but didn't even think of trying to actually game her due to the aforementioned. It seems like such a risky thing to actually do unless you're able to routinely pull women anyway. I myself can't approach women irl no matter who they are so for me to try something like that would most likely be useless

Easier for me to read younger women. I wait for their expression of interest. Often a giddiness or an excited or joyful presentation. They’ll ask way more questions than necessary. Or give out more info than needed. As an example. I went to get a pair of glasses from Warby Parker. The girl who helped me was cute & friendly. We wound up talking so long, and about non-glasses stuff. Her manager pulled her aside She apologized and said her manager told her to help other customers. she told me she worked at a XYZ matcha tea shop in The Mission & she’d be there tomorrow. I came by.

 

[BergischerLöwe]

Easier for me to read younger women. I wait for their expression of interest. Often a giddiness or an excited or joyful presentation. They’ll ask way more questions than necessary. Or give out more info than needed. As an example. I went to get a pair of glasses from Warby Parker. The girl who helped me was cute & friendly. We wound up talking so long, and about non-glasses stuff. Her manager pulled her aside She apologized and said her manager told her to help other customers. she told me she worked at a XYZ matcha tea shop in The Mission & she’d be there tomorrow. I came by.

Hmm doesn’t seem like anything I can count on, I never get those kinda signals from waitresses or cashiers. At least not any that are obvious enough for me to act on

 

[Hamurabimbi]

Hmm doesn’t seem like anything I can count on, I never get those kinda signals from waitresses or cashiers. At least not any that are obvious enough for me to act on

I’m probably more of an opportunist. When I get a ‘buy’ signal or even an interest’ signal. I move in. Also one of my jobs involves reading people and persuading them. This is a big advantage in any interpersonal interaction.

 

[BergischerLöwe]

I’m probably more of an opportunist. When I get a ‘buy’ signal or even an interest’ signal. I move in. Also one of my jobs involves reading people and persuading them. This is a big advantage in any interpersonal interaction.

I myself am more cautious about pretty much everything, so with the concept of approaching in general it's something I'm far less likely to do I guess

 

[Hamurabimbi]

I myself am more cautious about pretty much everything, so with the concept of approaching in general it's something I'm far less likely to do I guess

Do it at clubs/bars. No shame if the approach fails there. And everyone is doing it.

 

[BergischerLöwe]

Do it at clubs/bars. No shame if the approach fails there. And everyone is doing it.

That's not ideal either. It's very unlikely I'd find the sort of women I'm looking for there and I don't drink much anyway. I'm not able rn to just go and start approaching

 

[Hamurabimbi]

That's not ideal either. It's very unlikely I'd find the sort of women I'm looking for there and I don't drink much anyway. I'm not able rn to just go and start approaching

Alcohol is liquid courage.

 

[BergischerLöwe]

Alcohol is liquid courage.

Trust me, even when drunk I can't do it

 

[Styr]

Alcohol is liquid courage.

It is more of an inhibitor.

 

[Knight of Roses]

Actually, the worst thing would be (false) sexual harassment accusations.

Usually those occur if you two share a place of work. I don’t see it happening if he’s a customer.

 

[member162951]

Dude, this is common among waitresses at any age. She was angling for a big tip plain and simple. Not at all surprised she turned you down.