do you take it personally when a girl is not interested?

[Gameplayer007]

this girl is not into me but after I mentioned to her how it was like rude she was blowing me off (but in person was nice) she was like "dont take it personal".

lol.. isn't all of dating personal? just wondering.

You really shouldn't take it personal. To be honest, guys will be rejected way more than women ever will be. And that's fine. To not take it personally you just to have to come from a place of abundance and know what you want. For me, I'd rather be on a date with a woman I can have witty banter with and fun, versus a complete boring and dry wall that looks like a model. Figure out what kind of woman you want to date and then see who's out there. If she doesn't meet at least 70% of what you want, or she shows a lot of red flags or signs that you shouldn't date her, then you walk away.

If she's a girl who meets 70% or more of what you're looking for, perfect. See if it'll go somewhere and if not, then the good thing is you've gained experienced and eventually will find the right person.

 

[Solomon]

This is really accurate. Some woman from a swipe app will forget she had a first date with you within a few days of it happening. This is because of women's incredible abundance online. If a man just disappears after the date and doesn't lash out, he gets forgotten near instantaneously. I also think this is true to a lesser extent for women who don't use swipe apps/social media as a method of meeting men but are actively going out a lot.

I've had this happen

I had a chick of Tinder had a ONS with, after the hook up she was showing me videos and pics of other guys asking if I knew them. I found it weird and told her to put it away. We matched a month later and she didn't remember me until I told her who I was.

Had another chick who I hooked up with 5 years ago on Bumble, as well

I recently had a woman tell me she had a boyfriend and 4 FWB's yes FWB's. I blocked her...nope not doing that

It truly makes you wonder how much **** are these women getting especially on dating apps?

 

[GoodMan32]

Yeah, I take it personally.

Because if a woman isn't into me, chances are it's because she's not into who I am as a person on the inside (I'd be thrilled if the woman simply wasn't into me because of my height, looks, etc)

 

[SW15]

I had a chick of Tinder had a ONS with, after the hook up she was showing me videos and pics of other guys asking if I knew them. I found it weird and told her to put it away. We matched a month later and she didn't remember me until I told her who I was.

It truly makes you wonder how much **** are these women getting especially on dating apps?

Until roughly menopause age, women can have as much sex as they'd like from swipe apps.

However, most women aren't overindulging in sex. It's a far more common outcome off of a swipe apps for a woman to have a "1-2 date, no sex, no extended relationship" interaction off of the swipe apps.

Most women have multiple failed 1st dates for every sex partner they have off of a swipe app.

Even though most women aren't overindulging in sex, they can still put a high body count off of the abundance on the swipe apps.

A woman could have sex with 5 men in a year off of apps, but she probably had 20-40 failed first dates in that same time period and ghosted hundreds of other men.

 

[Solomon]

Until roughly menopause age, women can have as much sex as they'd like from swipe apps.

However, most women aren't overindulging in sex. It's a far more common outcome off of a swipe apps for a woman to have a "1-2 date, no sex, no extended relationship" interaction off of the swipe apps.

Most women have multiple failed 1st dates for every sex partner they have off of a swipe app.

Even though most women aren't overindulging in sex, they can still put a high body count off of the abundance on the swipe apps.

A woman could have sex with 5 men in a year off of apps, but she probably had 20-40 failed first dates in that same time period and ghosted hundreds of other men.

I don't have the data, but from anecdotal evidence and this isn't my experience but also my buddies whom I commonly share notes with. Women who tend to be on swipe apps especially for a year or longer tend to be far more promiscus and indugle in whorish behavior. I remember one woman admitting to me

"I'm just having fun on the apps to see how much **** I can get"​

After we hooked up (on Tinder) I felt gross, a normal woman does not talk like this but an aspiring ***** does

 

[SW15]

I don't have the data, but from anecdotal evidence and this isn't my experience but also my buddies whom I commonly share notes with. Women who tend to be on swipe apps especially for a year or longer tend to be far more promiscus and indugle in whorish behavior.

I am aware of women who appear to be on swipe apps near perpetually. This has been the case for some women for multiple years at a time. They do tend to put up higher notch counts.

You and I have seen similar anecdotal evidence.

 

[Pandora]

Interesting point. I wonder if that "younger" version of yourself eventually stopped at a certain age, meaning, the point at which you started seeing new women with a sort of “15-minute delay.”


Also, this entire post makes me think of one specific thing, something @Pandora also talks about:
Some women have dependency issues. They find a guy and, no matter how turbulent the relationship is or how many problems he has or how badly he treats her. She'll stay. Because there’s something in him that reminds her of her childhood, and also because she have a real issue with emotional dependency and can’t imagine herself without that guy. She might “die” without him. So that guy might have zero objective value, but to her, he’s everything.


And those "happy" couples you see out there, with kids, marriages, big houses, might actually be hiding something very simple: plain codependency.


If a girl thinks you’re her Plan A, rest assured she’ll always be there bugging you, texting you, liking your posts on social media, bumping into you in the street, spending time with you, doing anything to make it clear that she wants you.


If a girl thinks you’re her Plan B, then all of the above applies too, but only when her Plan A has somehow failed or is "temporarily" out of the picture (loss of interest, etc.).
This "plan b" situation is the worst, and I found myself in it.
From that moment on, I ended up on sosuave.


Wishing you growth, my friend.

Yeh bro. Most of attraction is based on chilldhood archetypes and all that woo woo psychological stuff. Carl Jung talks about that stuff. The man who wrote the Art of Seduction talks about it too.

Why do you like the type of car you like? Or the type of music? It stems from childhood. If you really want to get weird it may stem from reincarnation.

The point is outside of a guy being hot a woman cant really pin point why she is obsessed with a certain guy. Its never personal. Its all subconscious. It could be as simple as you subconsciously remind her of the lead actor of a tv show she used to watch as a child. That lead actor formed the archetype of what a man should look like and act like.

Or it could be that she is deeply insecure about her skin color and now only dates fair skin men or dark skin men ( whatever the insecurity is). Or it could be that her father is black and her mom is white. She has a mild Electra complex and dates dudes that are like her dad.

This is why when a women really likes you it is instantaneous. Its zero to 100. Its hard to shake. Its not personal homie. You just triggered some weird subconscious void that she is trying to fill in her psyche.

 

[Pandora]

You ever had a girl tell you that she does not feel the "chemistry". I had a girl at the coffee shop tell me this. This is after she complimented my socks and outfit. I thought I had a chance so I started hitting on her. When she politely rejected me I did not take it personal. Yeh it stung a little bit but I understood.

The convo with her was akward. We had nothing in common. We were different people. Her childhood was most likely vastly different than mine. What she considers a man is probably not a preppy black dude that wears interesting socks etc. I was unfamiliar and that is ok. Women are really good at feeling this. Everyone is trying to fill a childhood abandonment wound.

When a girl really likes you most of the time you are her brand of wound filler so to speak. The subconscious is a fascinating thing. Look at persons porn history to really get a sense of what they really like and want.

Again I know a girl that watches old man porn because of a subconscious daddy issue. She really loved her dad ( no molestations or anything like that). So she ended up marrying a guy significantly older than her who took care of her. Its never personal.

 

[Pandora]

And those "happy" couples you see out there, with kids, marriages, big houses, might actually be hiding something very simple: plain codependency.

So there are 2 words that baffle me. Codependency and fetish. Lets stick to codependency. I dont like this word. Virtually everyone is codependent when they are in love. You want your girl to be this way. You want her to be obsessed with your validation. You want her to want to be with you all the time.

If a girl is totally rational about you and is independent without you then she does not like you that much homie.

Very few people are 100% psychologically healthy. We are all broken in some way. So codependency is normal really. Of course there are women who take this to the extreme for example BPD girls etc. Thats unhealthy.

This scene was brilliant about this topic. Listen to what he asks the woman!

 

[Pandora]

Sorry guys I just wanted to add one more story. I had an ex that had a childhood wound about money. The key to get her was to shower her with gifts. It don't matter how you look. Her love language was consistent gift giving, signs of affluence and semi lavish dinners. You do that 4 or 5 times you were in. She was hot too. She didnt have that much growing up until they got rich. She talks about her dad being embarrassing for what he drove when she was a child etc.

These are the things that form our seduction triggers as we get older. Women just have a hard time expressing this. It aint personal.

 

[Bingo-Player]

It's just not that serious man.

It is a clear signal towards her lack of respect to you though so I would argue it is pretty serious depending on how well you know her

Most of the time guys will just reject themselves early on or make it easy to be rejected

But let's not pretend we aren't in an era where there are some very very disrespectful women out there

 

[BackInTheGame78]

It is a clear signal towards her lack of respect to you though so I would argue it is pretty serious depending on how well you know her

Most of the time guys will just reject themselves early on or make it easy to be rejected

But let's not pretend we aren't in an era where there are some very very disrespectful women out there

You teach others how to treat you.

 

[jhonny9546]

@BackInTheGame78 @Bingo-Player come to Italy to play the game in "Critical" mode

 

[DJ Novice]

You need to rack up your rejection count from women.

The early ones you will take personally.

As time goes on and your rejection count increases it will cease to annoy you.

When I get rejected now I think ‘great, I don’t need to waste any more time and effort on her’, I tend to forget she ever existed and move on to the next prospect.

 

[H8CourtshipWithAPassion]

already stated it