Dead Bedrooms and Weak Moments

[jhonny9546]

You will surely have come across this particular type of woman.
They are already in a relationship with a man, so they might be a simple couple, a married couple, or a couple with children.
When they are in a good moment, meaning they have sex regularly, they behave as normal. However, when they are in a temporary dead bedroom, meaning they haven't had sex for one or two weeks (not months, just weeks), they start looking around, trying to add drama to the relationship, or seeking new partners or seducing those in proximity, like orbiters.


Now, different things can happen, but I am speaking to you from my experience and from what happened to friends.
In particular, in my case, it was about two women who, during this "weak moment", did everything to sabotage their relationship and attempted monkeybranching.
The first time, I fell for it with a woman who was in a relationship with no children and not married. She certainly had me in consideration on her "plan B" list. I am talking to you about six years ago.
After she went on a break with her current man, we had wild and incredible sex for a month.
Then, for some reason, she went back to him, obviously without telling him about the breakup, and she deleted me from her life forever. Now they're still togheter ahaha.

It happened a second time with a married woman with kids, but this time I categorically refused after much thought.

Now we come to the crucial question: why do some women do this during this dead bedroom moments, while others do not?

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Because they have needs and desires that are not being fulfilled but ultimately feel like they have too much invested, have too much security and/or care about the man too much to leave him for good.

 

[jhonny9546]

Because they have needs and desires that are not being fulfilled but ultimately feel like they have too much invested, have too much security and/or care about the man too much to leave him for good.

So in this case even a healthy person, starts a toxic relationship, and becomes toxic if she does not grow. Also, this look like starting "codependency"

Because they have needs and desires that are not being fulfilled

I also think that sometimes this does not depend on them, but also on the influence of the media.
If every female in her social circle starts buying a certain sex toy, then she will want it too, and if you are not able to satisfy her with it, then she has an "unsatisfied need" but that is actually not hers, but a surrogate. I hate this thing, and it makes up 80% of modern women.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

So in this case even a healthy person, starts a toxic relationship, and becomes toxic if she does not grow. Also, this look like starting "codependency"



I also think that sometimes this does not depend on them, but also on the influence of the media.
If every female in her social circle starts buying a certain sex toy, then she will want it too, and if you are not able to satisfy her with it, then she has an "unsatisfied need" but that is actually not hers, but a surrogate. I hate this thing, and it makes up 80% of modern women.

This has been going on for millenia, there was no media back in Roman Times but the same thing happened. Humans are humans.

 

[SW15]

when they are in a temporary dead bedroom, meaning they haven't had sex for one or two weeks (not months, just weeks), they start looking around, trying to add drama to the relationship, or seeking new partners or seducing those in proximity, like orbiters.

1-2 weeks of no sex isn't that much. That barely qualifies as a temporary dead bedroom. Most LTR guys deal with 1-2 weeks of no sex at times.

I'm not sure if most women are going to seek new partners if they go 1-2 weeks without sex.

 

[Juanto]

1-2 weeks of no sex isn't that much. That barely qualifies as a temporary dead bedroom. Most LTR guys deal with 1-2 weeks of no sex at times.

I'm not sure if most women are going to seek new partners if they go 1-2 weeks without sex.

I agree, 1 or 2 months definately yes, 1-2 weeks is manageable from time to time

 

[SW15]

I agree, 1 or 2 months definately yes, 1-2 weeks is manageable from time to time

In an LTR, it would be problematic to get to 1 month without sex.

1 week without sex can happen if one of the people has an out of town trip (business trip, maybe a family funeral of a more distant family member) and travels without the other. Menstrual flow can also lead to nearly one week without sex too if a couple doesn't do period sex.

2 weeks would tend to rule out the travel or menstrual cycle excuses.

 

[CornbreadFed]

In an LTR, it would be problematic to get to 1 month without sex.

1 week without sex can happen if one of the people has an out of town trip (business trip, maybe a family funeral of a more distant family member) and travels without the other. Menstrual flow can also lead to nearly one week without sex too if a couple doesn't do period sex.

2 weeks would tend to rule out the travel or menstrual cycle excuses.

I am completely content with once a week because I am just tired AF and there's other things I would rather do.

 

[MatureDJ]

1-2 weeks of no sex isn't that much. That barely qualifies as a temporary dead bedroom. Most LTR guys deal with 1-2 weeks of no sex at times.

I'm not sure if most women are going to seek new partners if they go 1-2 weeks without sex.

It also matters whether it's a one-and-done, or a double- or even triple-cûm party.

 

[Travel memoir21]

Dead bedroom moments? More likely it maybe a combination of many things.

He chose the wrong partner because she's not fulfilling her obligatory duties as a wife and probably rode the d1ck carousel a long, long time ago and is spoiled. Or the Man is not living in his masculine essence and not living his purpose and having goals or short term goals. The wife can detect this in his behavior and feel uninspired. Read the Book ' The Way of the Superior Man', By David Deida. It's a good book, it's alright, I agree with him on this aspect lol.

The bottom line, if you really want to have an 'exciting type of sex life' with your wife.....there's one common secret you should follow and guys like King David and Solomon many great personalities who were aware of this, and that is to sleep in separate rooms from your wife or partner. When you build your house, plan a room for yourself only to sleep. This in itself will generate sexual tension and adventure with you and your wife and create a girlfriend and boyfriend dynamic. It will also create peace and harmony whether you're having sex or not.

All great marriages, have periods where theres peace and there not having sex for many months. The purpose of having increased sex shoud be having kids and planning to have more children, even though intimacy at times plays a factor. What you want to do is cultivate a spiritual life within your marriage or relationship and learn how to feel great without it, and the ironic part is that your wife will sense this and this will create attraction and she would want to start having sex with you again. Spiritual practices like No Fap semen retention, taking brisk walks with your dog, painting a nature landscape on a canvass, dancing and learning an instrument are great ways to get those 'romance moments' with your significant other.

 

[Barrister]

OP,

I think your post is conflating a number of things and you have a chicken and egg issue. You are claiming the "chicken" (the dead bedroom) came before the "egg" (the woman is not having sex). Generally speaking, 9/10 times the woman is responsible for a dead bedroom. They are the gatekeepers to sex. Most men are not going to cut off sex even if the relationship is going off track. So the fact the woman isn't getting sex is not why she is looking elsewhere.

To make it more clear: these women are not asking their man for sex and not getting it and thinking "wow, I need to find a guy who actually will sleep with me." More like - the woman isn't having sex because she doesn't want sex with the man she is with; she wants a different man and is bored/completely over the man she is with. Hence a dead bedroom ensues where a woman wants nothing to do with the man she is with despite the fact that the man (very likely) is still wanting to have sex with her.

Now, maybe her reasons for cutting the man off are legitimate. Whatever the cause, my personal experience has been when an LTR is going south, the woman's receptiveness to sex tends to completely dry up.

 

[The Duke]

Dead bedroom moments? More likely it maybe a combination of many things.

He chose the wrong partner because she's not fulfilling her obligatory duties as a wife and probably rode the d1ck carousel a long, long time ago and is spoiled. Or the Man is not living in his masculine essence and not living his purpose and having goals or short term goals. The wife can detect this in his behavior and feel uninspired. Read the Book ' The Way of the Superior Man', By David Deida. It's a good book, it's alright, I agree with him on this aspect lol.

The bottom line, if you really want to have an 'exciting type of sex life' with your wife.....there's one common secret you should follow and guys like King David and Solomon many great personalities who were aware of this, and that is to sleep in separate rooms from your wife or partner. When you build your house, plan a room for yourself only to sleep. This in itself will generate sexual tension and adventure with you and your wife and create a girlfriend and boyfriend dynamic. It will also create peace and harmony whether you're having sex or not.

All great marriages, have periods where theres peace and there not having sex for many months. The purpose of having increased sex shoud be having kids and planning to have more children, even though intimacy at times plays a factor. What you want to do is cultivate a spiritual life within your marriage or relationship and learn how to feel great without it, and the ironic part is that your wife will sense this and this will create attraction and she would want to start having sex with you again. Spiritual practices like No Fap semen retention, taking brisk walks with your dog, painting a nature landscape on a canvass, dancing and learning an instrument are great ways to get those 'romance moments' with your significant other.

I never knew you were married, how many years?