Sex help: Losing erection too quickly

[parisaga]

(First off, yeah I've done a huge search, but couldn't find my question/problem...)

I'm having problems maintaining my erection. Not getting it, mind you, I have no probs there. But once I have it, I can only have sex for maybe 5-10 min tops before it starts to go.

My gf has been really cool, we're in a monog relationship w/o condoms. But it's starting to get to me because I haven't been able to make her orgasm consistently since we've been going out, simply because this keeps recurring.

Any help? I actually have some Viagra but that only helps somewhat. Any muscle clenching, mental clarity things, etc that people have had success with??

PS. I'm 28, don't smoke, drink mildly, and am in great shape

 

[SheDevil]

When you say "it goes" you mean you lose your erection or ejac?

I think 28 is a little young to take Viaga, that just increases blood flow. You probably are having bad sinus problems and headaches with the viagra - if you problem lies in other areas. Just making a trip to the Dr. would probably be best.

Your girlfriend sounds understanding, but your concern could be part of your cause. Stress is a bytch when it comes to sex. You could bring your girlfriend around in plenty of other ways. See, men only orgasm one way, women have several ways to climax. You can stimulate her orally or with your fingers, or a little of both at one time. ****oral, G-Spot, or Vaginal orgasms are all wonderful and easliy achieved without intercourse.

Use the time you are erect for intercourse AFTER you have brought her orally and she will bow at your feet!!

Good luck to you both. SheDevil

 

[Slickster]

Sounds like a mental thing to me.

Is it possible you are just not "connecting" with your gal in the bedroom yet? How long have you been having sex with her?


True sexual compatability doesn't come easily. You may love her and the sex may be good. But are both of you TOTALLY satisfied.? Are both of you letting go completely when you are together sexually?

Is it possible you have sexual fears of inadequacy with this gal? Has this happened with other women.?

If any of this has a ring of truth to it my advice is to just give it to her! Giver man. Stop thinking during sex. Let it all go and don't be afraid to show it. The amount of sexual pleasure you show directly affects your partners arousal.

Sounds like maybe you get all worked up but then get bored and start thinking about it too much. Ya gotta get freaky man.

 

[Walden]

Stop jerking off (if you are).

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

Re: Re: Sex help: Losing erection too quickly

Originally posted by SheDevil
You can stimulate her orally or with your fingers, or a little of both at one time. ****oral, G-Spot, or Vaginal orgasms are all wonderful and easliy achieved without intercourse.

Use the time you are erect for intercourse AFTER you have brought her orally and she will bow at your feet!!

Good luck to you both. SheDevil

Don't do this - it will be only a desperate attempt to please her for fear of losing her!!!

I believe your cause is mental and it is a self perpetuating self fulfilling prophecy!! Only think of the excitement that she brings you and think of her femininity.

If it was a physical problem then you wouldn't have gotten the erection in the first place!!

 

[parisaga]

Re: Re: Re: Sex help: Losing erection too quickly

Originally posted by PuertoRican_Lover
I believe your cause is mental and it is a self perpetuating self fulfilling prophecy!! Only think of the excitement that she brings you and think of her femininity.

If it was a physical problem then you wouldn't have gotten the erection in the first place!!

Thanks, that's what I ended up doing, and had good luck last night and this morning. Rather than trying to please her, I'm just enjoying it myself and the rest seems to work itself out.

SheDevil, she can't O orally anyways, strangely enough. She's been around enough to know. I've used my "tried and true" stuff that's worked on every other chick I've been with and it just doesn't work on her. Go figure.

Now the only remaining hurdle is just the fact that she's a difficult one to get off consistently... but that's the fun of it...

 

[MackJr]

Sounds like it's her problem. I hear that women can learn to orgasm better if they practice with a vibrator. You might want to mention this in a way that won't get her mad.

 

[Cesare Cardinali]

Maybe you're gay?

Seriously, you should examine whether you'll have this problem with other chicks or if it's just with this girl. Do you have this problem when you jerk off too?

 

[MackJr]

there are some legitimate physical problems like blood pressure and diabetes that can influence erections. Hypoglycemia as well. a chief psychological problem is anxiety.

 

[cave dweller]

E-----

Try some multiple vitamins?
also
Try vitamin E.....
cave dweller

 

[disciple]

As Slickster said, it could a mental thing but if it is a physical thing then there are some things you can do to maintain your sh*t.

First, we know that an erection is caused by blood rushing to the penis as a result of sexual stimulation.

Well, the quality and longevity of an erection is largely based on the quality of circulation of blood to that area.

If you are overweight or don't get much exercise, then your circulation could be very poor.

You can't work on just increasing the blood flow to your penis you have to increase your overall circulation and that includes the flow to your penis.

Now, regular exercise that keeps your heart rate up for periods of time like cardiovascular exercises will definitely help with the circulation because your heart will pump blood faster.

There are also supplements like Vitamin E that increases circulation. You may want to take some Zinc supplements as Zinc
plays an important role in male virility and potency.

There are other supplements such as various herbs that can help you but you can easily do an Internet search and research that for yourself.

The only tip I'll give you concerning the mental side of it is that the mind is a powerful aphrodisiac and when you have sex it is not just a physical act, it is very much a mental one.

You have to mentally stimulate yourself by thinking or imagining dirty thoughts while your having sex or talking dirty or trying some new or freaky sh*t or focusing on just enjoying the look, feel, smell, taste, and touch of her body and the overall pleasure of making love to a beautiful woman which truly is one of life's greatest pleasures.

 

[cave dweller]

minks

Here is an idea.......

Don't 'bang' her for one month...........

When you mount her you will fvck like minks........

)

cave dweller

 

[MRomeo99]

I can't believe, after all these posts, this hasn't been mentioned.

Go see a doctor dude. Just at least to make sure things are ok. Most likely it's all mental. But, there are physical reasons why it might not be working as it should, and it's best to have a really good physical to make sure everything is ok. And if everything comes out fine, then at least that's one less thing you need to worry about. As you get to around 30, you should be having a physical at least once a year anyway.

Just my thoughts on it.

M

 

[parisaga]

Thanks for all the replies guys.

Here's a couple brief updates:

- saw a DR, got a complete checkup, supposedly 100% ok
- have been doing the PC exercises and those seem to help
- have pretty much resolved it's 90+% mental

I have noticed that being 28 I'm far less sensitized than when I was 18... but what can you do?? Taking a month off is not gonna happen, especially when this chick wants it 3-5 times a day. There are worse problems to have.

Anyways... if anybody else has PHYSICAL suggestions that would be cool... I get tired after about 30 min despite being in great shape... so PC/Kegel exercises and related specific suggestions would be awesome...

 

[cave dweller]

3 to 5?

She wants it 3 to 5 times a day?

Shvt, thats your problem.......

cave dweller

 

[penkitten]

try prozac.. its the new vigara..
takes alot of animal sexO for you to finally finish

 

[Cleatus VanDamme]

.

 

[Alpine]

Hmm. PC exercises are great and unless I've read your problem wrong they will only prevent PE, not losing an erection.

Anxiety would be my bet. You are fo some reason changing state from aroused to not aroused.

Can you pull off for ages in private or does the same thing happen?

Does the erection go at a particular point in the proceedings?

These questions may help pin it down.

If you're fine with other women then obviously it's specific, you may just find she turns you off, in which case you've got some thinking to do.

 

[Hot Ice]

I had same thing too earlier man...
even I'm 19.

Which was some or most or all of these facts:

1 ) It was one of the first times we had sex. Maybe I was nervous even I didn't feel like it.
2 ) I've whacked off recently
3 ) I hadn't ate well before
4 ) I was drunk
5 ) I had recently smoked much
6 ) I lacked exercise at the moment (or testosterone as general)
7 ) I had stress over other things
8 ) I wasn't relaxed enough
9 ) I was too brainwashed by media AND sosuave to perform well in bed
10) Being used watching porn on a screen isntead of seeing it right before you
...


There are many reasons a man can loose his erection. If the problem doesn't go away in long period of time then it's time for getting help.

 

[cave dweller]

woody

I think you are 'banging' her too much.
Since you refuse to hold off for a month try it for one week.
I would say after a week, with no sex, that you could get and maintain a good 'woody'.

my 2 cents

cave dweller