Wife cut her hair

Fruitbat

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I fkin hate it. I like long hair. It’s now shoulder length and it totally ruins her look.

she said it’s because the ends are damaged and she has skin issues on her neck.

Plenty women seem to be able to manage long hair without having to cut it.

pretty devastated. I don’t think women understand how important hair is to a woman’s look and that the vast majority of us like long, uncomplicated hair.

she is always colouring it, and messing around with it when if she just let it grow out naturally it would look 10x better.

I genuinely think I lost a ton of attraction to her.

I also can’t believe it is actually necessary to cut hair for its overall health. I know a bunch of women who just maintain the same look year in year out.
 

Millard Fillmore

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Did she talk to you about it first? Not that she needs permission but wives/gfs are always shopworking hair changes with their men and friends.

IME most women make drastic cuts because 1) it's easier to maintain (esp. during summer) and 2) they always want a new "look." Whereas men wear the same damn hairstyle to their grave.

Personally I think it's odd that women wear super short hair when they get old. Every once in a while I see a grey haired woman who wears it long (or long-ish) and think it's a good classic look for an aging woman. But I digress.
 

plumber

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yeh, women look nice usually in long hair. just like men look good with hair. Just doesn't work out for some of us.
 

Westminster

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I fkin hate it. I like long hair. It’s now shoulder length and it totally ruins her look.

she said it’s because the ends are damaged and she has skin issues on her neck.

Plenty women seem to be able to manage long hair without having to cut it.

pretty devastated. I don’t think women understand how important hair is to a woman’s look and that the vast majority of us like long, uncomplicated hair.

she is always colouring it, and messing around with it when if she just let it grow out naturally it would look 10x better.

I genuinely think I lost a ton of attraction to her.

I also can’t believe it is actually necessary to cut hair for its overall health. I know a bunch of women who just maintain the same look year in year out.
I like long hair but shoulder length can still be good. It's short hair, that cropped spikey or short back and sides look I'm not into.
 

Westminster

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Did she talk to you about it first? Not that she needs permission but wives/gfs are always shopworking hair changes with their men and friends.

IME most women make drastic cuts because 1) it's easier to maintain (esp. during summer) and 2) they always want a new "look." Whereas men wear the same damn hairstyle to their grave.

Personally I think it's odd that women wear super short hair when they get old. Every once in a while I see a grey haired woman who wears it long (or long-ish) and think it's a good classic look for an aging woman. But I digress.
A lot of women find it hard to grow long hair once they hit the menopause. It also tends to be more brittle and harder to keep in good condition, so it is hard work for an older woman to have good-looking long hair.

So, there's a reason why long hair is a sign of youth.
 

zekko

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Most guys around here seem to think women need your permission to style their hair the way they want. Some women can look super sexy with shorter hair (not too short), but yeah we love that long haired youthful look with the hair flowing down their back. Yep.

When I was a lad back in the '70s, I used to try to grow my hair long to get that hippie rocker type look. But it would always drive me crazy so I would end up cutting it off. Never did get it real long. I could understand the split ends and skin issues. I don't know how women manage keeping their hair long like they do, it has to be a major pain in the arse to deal with.
 

Fruitbat

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Most guys around here seem to think women need your permission to style their hair the way they want. Some women can look super sexy with shorter hair (not too short), but yeah we love that long haired youthful look with the hair flowing down their back. Yep.

When I was a lad back in the '70s, I used to try to grow my hair long to get that hippie rocker type look. But it would always drive me crazy so I would end up cutting it off. Never did get it real long. I could understand the split ends and skin issues. I don't know how women manage keeping their hair long like they do, it has to be a major pain in the arse to deal with.
but it looks SO good.

my wife’s hair is still longer than shoulder length but it used to be halfway down her back when I loved. I was almost in tears this morning about it :)
 

SW15

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Women are generally going to look better with longer hair. I like the mid-back length too. Below is an example of a 20 something (reportedly 23 right now) with shoulder length hair (video posted less than a week ago) and the same woman from a year ago with a little bit longer hair.



In the first video, her face looks thinner so she might weigh less with shorter hair. I like her better overall with the longer hair.

@Westminster is correct about menopausal/post menopausal with longer hair. Longer hair is more difficult for women starting around ages 45-50.
 

pipeman84

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Most guys around here seem to think women need your permission to style their hair the way they want.
It's not really about permission, more like clearly communicating preferences ... which is part of establishing the masculine frame and is done way before getting married.
So if the man has clearly expressed he likes long hair, natural or close to natural colour and the woman just cuts her hair and dyes it red, that's practically like a swift kick in the balls and insulting him to his face. :rolleyes:
 

Millard Fillmore

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Most guys around here seem to think women need your permission to style their hair the way they want. Some women can look super sexy with shorter hair (not too short), but yeah we love that long haired youthful look with the hair flowing down their back. Yep.

When I was a lad back in the '70s, I used to try to grow my hair long to get that hippie rocker type look. But it would always drive me crazy so I would end up cutting it off. Never did get it real long. I could understand the split ends and skin issues. I don't know how women manage keeping their hair long like they do, it has to be a major pain in the arse to deal with.
This tall girl I saw at the gym has super long hair, and she had it in a single braid down her back. I noticed when she walked it tapped her a$$ swinging to and fro. (She was in nice spandex too.) I thought, now there's a nice benefit to long hair, lol.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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I genuinely think I lost a ton of attraction to her.
I hope you mean she lost attraction.

my wife’s hair is still longer than shoulder length but it used to be halfway down her back when I loved. I was almost in tears this morning about it :)
You act like a woman now.

She knows you like her hair long, but long hair is takes a lot of care and maintenance. Apparently she doesn't care about looking good for you anymore.
 

Millard Fillmore

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So if the man has clearly expressed he likes long hair, natural or close to natural colour and the woman just cuts her hair and dyes it red, that's practically like a swift kick in the balls and insulting him to his face. :rolleyes:
I don't think you have been kicked in the balls before.
 

Fruitbat

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Bad sign, OP.

My wife would never. She asks me which hair I prefer every time she goes to the salon. It’s not a “permission;” it is about looking good for me.
she is growing it back. It’s because she said the ends are fked and she needs to start again. Plus she does have a ton of excema on back of neck she think it will help clear that.
 

Fruitbat

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I hope you mean she lost attraction.


You act like a woman now.

She knows you like her hair long, but long hair is takes a lot of care and maintenance. Apparently she doesn't care about looking good for you anymore.
yeah a bit

you missed in the Op

“she said it’s because the ends are damaged and she has skin issues on her neck.”

she’s growing it out but it’s fkin annoying
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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you missed in the Op

“she said it’s because the ends are damaged and she has skin issues on her neck.”
No, I didn't miss that. Both are excuses, not reasons. If women use 'hair masks', the ends don't get damaged, and if she has skin issues it's not from the hair, but from either the hair products she used, because with that shorter hair she still gets the hair on her neck.
 

The Duke

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I fkin hate it. I like long hair. It’s now shoulder length and it totally ruins her look.

she said it’s because the ends are damaged and she has skin issues on her neck.

Plenty women seem to be able to manage long hair without having to cut it.

pretty devastated. I don’t think women understand how important hair is to a woman’s look and that the vast majority of us like long, uncomplicated hair.

she is always colouring it, and messing around with it when if she just let it grow out naturally it would look 10x better.

I genuinely think I lost a ton of attraction to her.

I also can’t believe it is actually necessary to cut hair for its overall health. I know a bunch of women who just maintain the same look year in year out.
This is why its important to maintain expectations and frame in a realtionship. This topic has came up in multiple long term relationships of mine.

As the leader of your relationship, you need to communicate the expectations up front. I always told my girls that if you cut your hair we are breaking up/divorcing, and If I wanted a girl with short hair I would have found one to start with. And guess what, none of them ever did something drastic like cut their hair short.

At some point they all approached me about cutting it short. I'd reiterate my stance on the subject and then they would agree to cut only what was needed to get rid of the split ends.

As they age "split ends" become more of an issue but all they need to do is get no more than 2-3" cut off if its bad. A 1" cut on a regular basis with premium haircare products will make her hair much healthier.

I'd let her know I was disappointed and that you expect her to grow it back out. There are some products that help hair grow faster.

If you didn't create the expectation up front then this is on you. If you did and she crossed it, then I'd lay her into azz really hard.

Long hair is one of the most feminine features a woman can have. Ranks right up there with b(*)(*)bs, vagina, and a submissive attitude.

ps. Tell her to go get some hair extensions.
 
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plumber

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but it looks SO good.

my wife’s hair is still longer than shoulder length but it used to be halfway down her back when I loved. I was almost in tears this morning about it :)
Did it bother you that she did not talk to you about it, and it was a surprise?
 

Fruitbat

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Did it bother you that she did not talk to you about it, and it was a surprise?
Yeah!

Now I’ve looked at it, it’s about halfway to her nipple, it’s not as big as a job as I thought first time. She said the hairdresser took more off than she expected.

Probs overreacted a bit but still, the amount of shyt I’ve given her will make her think twice!
 
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