Refused sex

DarkKnight100

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Seeing a 22 year old chick for a couple months and smashed her several times.

A couple days ago we hooked up in the evening and smashed her as usual but she was extremely wet to the point that I had to change rubbers mid-way through. She orgasmed and in my view it was the best sex we´ve had to date.

She slept at mine and the next morning I initiate some kino with her, she leaves the bed uses the bathroom and disappears for 10 minutes. When she comes back she sits on an armchair in the room I say to her come to bed and she comes and I start initiating with her again and she says "stop last night was enough for me". I act cold with her and get ready to leave and drop her home. She questions what´s wrong and I say nothing. After we talk about it over text and she says she doesn´t like having sex in the morning - I ask her why and she says just her preference. I didn´t reply and we haven´t spoken since (about 1 day).

Is it acceptable for your woman to refuse sex and what should is a good way of dealing with it?
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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Have sex in the shower.
 

The Duke

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Seeing a 22 year old chick for a couple months and smashed her several times.

A couple days ago we hooked up in the evening and smashed her as usual but she was extremely wet to the point that I had to change rubbers mid-way through. She orgasmed and in my view it was the best sex we´ve had to date.

She slept at mine and the next morning I initiate some kino with her, she leaves the bed uses the bathroom and disappears for 10 minutes. When she comes back she sits on an armchair in the room I say to her come to bed and she comes and I start initiating with her again and she says "stop last night was enough for me". I act cold with her and get ready to leave and drop her home. She questions what´s wrong and I say nothing. After we talk about it over text and she says she doesn´t like having sex in the morning - I ask her why and she says just her preference. I didn´t reply and we haven´t spoken since (about 1 day).

Is it acceptable for your woman to refuse sex and what should is a good way of dealing with it?
Here are a few things to think about:
-Women can easily fake orgasms and often do.
-A few months into the relationship is when things start to fall apart if its not going to make it.
-A relatively new girl that is really into you would not have done what this one did. She might not be a morning sex person but she could have came back to bed and simply laid with you. Why didn't she? Who knows....it could be thoughts of someone else, it could be she doesn't see this relationship lasting, her puzzy was sore, it could be she pooped and now isn't comfortable with being sexual nor telling you.

There's a reason she did what she did, she just wasn't telling you. I'm not buying her excuse. Its something deeper.

I'd stay vigilant. Usually the truth comes to the surface eventually.
 

FlexpertHamilton

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There's a difference in genuinely not wanting to have sex and "can't" having sex, the latter is manipulation. Doesn't sound like she was doing it as a power move or some other BS like that. I hate morning sex myself and I don't think that's a super uncommon opinion especially if you had good sex the night before.

I act cold with her and get ready to leave and drop her home. She questions what´s wrong and I say nothing.
Bro this is some chickenshvt low T faggot behavior. Don't ever do that again.
 

BPH

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Bro this is some chickenshvt low T faggot behavior. Don't ever do that again.
This gave me a good laugh.

But seriously cmon man you're 38 years old and this girl's acting more mature than you. You basically threw a tantrum AND brought it up over text to the point where she had to explain herself to you. I wouldn't be surprised if she stops seeing you after this.

I don't know why you guys overanalyze stuff like this and create problems that don't exist. Just remain unbothered and move on if it's "unacceptable" as you put it.
 

BeExcellent

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Advice from the old lady:

Facepalm. Your reaction OP (to act cold etc.) is really dum b if you want the interaction to continue. You think you are being all masculine but really you are being a jerk, you drop her off, say nothing etc.

You just erased any doubt in her mind that A.) You care ONLY about sex and B.) You ARE in fact an ass hole.

A self respecting woman would ghost you after that.

The correct response would have been simply to say "Ok." followed up by "Come snuggle" or "Let's grab some coffee", which could have shown her you actually see her as a human being and have some kindness in your soul.

Let us know how it works out for ya, but when you treat women as strictly objects, don't be surprised when they refuse to continue the interaction.

There was no need to blow this up OP.

Some of you guys need to learn to REWARD the behavior (sex) that she is giving you if you'd like that behavior to continue. That means acting like you give a crap about the other person from time to time.

This is on OP.
 

Desdinova

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I start initiating with her again and she says "stop last night was enough for me".
I've had it many times where sex will cause a woman's period to start. Either that's what happened or her pvssy / leg muscles were just worn out. It's no big deal if she wants a break. After all, you already fvcked her.

I act cold with her and get ready to leave and drop her home. She questions what´s wrong and I say nothing. After we talk about it over text and she says she doesn´t like having sex in the morning - I ask her why and she says just her preference. I didn´t reply and we haven´t spoken since (about 1 day).
Dude, WTF. Let her have her break. No need to make an entire episode about how she didn't want to fvck the next morning.
 

MatureDJ

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You need to make your sex sessions be multiple-cvm parties - at least 2 per. This will drain your essence better, allowing you to not have to have as many days be sex sessions.

Think of it like doing errands. You don't just go do one thing on a single errand; you stack up the stuff you need to do that way you won't have to be out as much.
 

Pierce Manhammer

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OP, you missed an opportunity. As mentioned, you could have shown her some compassion and brought her a cup of tea or coffee. Instead, you showed her that you're immature and self-centered.

I would think that if you had great sex with her the night before, you'd be willing to be nice to her for a few minutes, especially if it could have netted you more sex, which you wanted.

You may have FUBAR'd this. The only way she can come back is if she has zero self-esteem or has zero options.
 

DarkKnight100

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OP, you missed an opportunity. As mentioned, you could have shown her some compassion and brought her a cup of tea or coffee. Instead, you showed her that you're immature and self-centered.

I would think that if you had great sex with her the night before, you'd be willing to be nice to her for a few minutes, especially if it could have netted you more sex, which you wanted.

You may have FUBAR'd this. The only way she can come back is if she has zero self-esteem or has zero options.
She came over to mine we talked then we had great sex and went out to dinner, then we came back to mine listened to some music and slept together with lots of cuddling/affection. So it wasn´t a ´´a few minutes´´. And the sex was rewarded with dinner, cuddles and affection. The next morning was another situation, when she basically decided she didn´t want sex.

I don´t think the majority of replies understood this because I didn´t explain every little detail ^. There was kissing, affection, cuddling and conversation obviously lol. And disagree on making her a cup of tea or ask her to bed to cuddle when sex gets rejected. Can´t reward negative behaviours or you set yourselves up for a lifetime of rejection.

Going cold on her = withdrawing affection/attention, met her a few times and she´s been the one to leave this time I decided to tell her to leave. I didn´t start being a d*ck or rude to her we had normal conversation in the car on the way dropping her home.
 

DarkKnight100

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This gave me a good laugh.

But seriously cmon man you're 38 years old and this girl's acting more mature than you. You basically threw a tantrum AND brought it up over text to the point where she had to explain herself to you. I wouldn't be surprised if she stops seeing you after this.

I don't know why you guys overanalyze stuff like this and create problems that don't exist. Just remain unbothered and move on if it's "unacceptable" as you put it.
Withdrawing attention is not a tantrum. I was extremely calm and decided to carry on with my day - don´t be so presumptuous.
 

DarkKnight100

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Let us know how it works out for ya, but when you treat women as strictly objects, don't be surprised when they refuse to continue the interaction.

There was no need to blow this up OP.

Some of you guys need to learn to REWARD the behavior (sex) that she is giving you if you'd like that behavior to continue. That means acting like you give a crap about the other person from time to time.
Yes I think this is a good analysis of her perspective that she could have felt that I was only interested in sex. However obviously this has some months of context. But in isolation yes she could have felt that I was only interested in sex because she refused and I took her home. In context it doesn´t make total sense because the night before she wasn´t feeling good it was midnight and I drove to 3 chemists just to buy her medication and paid for it where as I could have just not given a sh*t. I think it´s true to say that everyone at times take isolated incidents and don´t consider the context so its very possible she felt this way.
 

DarkKnight100

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Then there´s the other question of do I want a woman who after great leg shaking sex decides on a whim the next morning that she doesn´t want to. A high quality woman should generally be ready when I want (of course there´s exceptions) seems a lot of guys here too ready to accept her behaviour and tag along with tea and snuggles.
 

BPH

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Withdrawing attention is not a tantrum. I was extremely calm and decided to carry on with my day - don´t be so presumptuous.
No, this was a tantrum.

The girl said no to morning sex, so you went cold, immediately suggested she leave, and then brought it up over text to the point where she had to defend herself, WHERE YOU THEN GHOSTED HER.

Tell yourself whatever you want but I'd be amazed if this girl came back to you, especially since you're acting like this when you're almost double her age.
 

Nitrozv20

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Seeing a 22 year old chick for a couple months and smashed her several times.

A couple days ago we hooked up in the evening and smashed her as usual but she was extremely wet to the point that I had to change rubbers mid-way through. She orgasmed and in my view it was the best sex we´ve had to date.

She slept at mine and the next morning I initiate some kino with her, she leaves the bed uses the bathroom and disappears for 10 minutes. When she comes back she sits on an armchair in the room I say to her come to bed and she comes and I start initiating with her again and she says "stop last night was enough for me". I act cold with her and get ready to leave and drop her home. She questions what´s wrong and I say nothing. After we talk about it over text and she says she doesn´t like having sex in the morning - I ask her why and she says just her preference. I didn´t reply and we haven´t spoken since (about 1 day).

Is it acceptable for your woman to refuse sex and what should is a good way of dealing with it?
Doesn't sound likes its anything to do with you, sounds like she just felt gross and didn't want to be embarrassed
 

Divorced w 3

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Way to blow a molehill into a mountain. Lay the pipe and the rest will handle itself.
 
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