I’m in deep

[Gamisch]

Wow, 5.5 hour convo must be a record on here.

A half an hour convo with my girl has me pulling my hair out.

Nah man...me and my ex had WAY longer convos...she thought she met God himself..

I was on top of the world..hb8,5 thought I was a Devine being sent from heaven..NOPE

I agree eventually it all worked against me..

You’re proposing that she moves in with you?

Wtf is going on???? I kinda recognize the codependency OP displays. I can be like that too...

But in what universe is this going to end well???

 

[Manure Spherian]

Boundaries are stupid.

What is the penalty for crossing said boundaries?

You cut her off?

47 other betas are in waiting and they don’t have those boundaries.

Does setting boundaries make her more attractive to you?

After setting these boundaries, does she become aroused??

She’s complaining to her girlfriends (and probably guys) about your controlling behavior that you label “respect” and “loyalty”.

She should naturally conform to your reasonable expectations without direction.

If she doesn’t, then she isn’t it.

Have you ever lived with a woman?

And yes, there are women turned on by men who put their foot down.

 

[Bethatsocialguy]

"We met because she approached me at a bar"- not common. Therefore not a common girl. It might be nice to be approached by a girl but it's unlikely that's her first time ever doing it which means to some degree she looks for male validation. Well let's just assume she was super into you.
"..she was super confident" - I would say that's a red flag because that means she's done it many times before. She should be a little bit shy when meeting a guy for the first time because she is physically inferior to him. Its natural instinct so if she doesn't have that, how many guys has she been around to feel that comfortable?

" She hadn’t had a real boyfriend in four years, at age 33"- absolutely a red flag.

It's only been a few sentences but already I am very sceptical about this woman so I don't think I need to read any more in order to give my opinion. But if you want to talk about that, you can send me a message

 

[soulforge]

"We met because she approached me at a bar"- not common. Therefore not a common girl. It might be nice to be approached by a girl but it's unlikely that's her first time ever doing it which means to some degree she looks for male validation. Well let's just assume she was super into you.
"..she was super confident" - I would say that's a red flag because that means she's done it many times before. She should be a little bit shy when meeting a guy for the first time because she is physically inferior to him. Its natural instinct so if she doesn't have that, how many guys has she been around to feel that comfortable?

" She hadn’t had a real boyfriend in four years, at age 33"- absolutely a red flag.

It's only been a few sentences but already I am very sceptical about this woman so I don't think I need to read any more in order to give my opinion. But if you want to talk about that, you can send me a message

Are you saying body count matters?

The biggest red flag for me is, single at age 33...

Why is no man willing to wife her up..
Why are her previous relationships failing..

 

[DreamAgain]

OP you are seemingly going to learn a very hard and expensive lesson if you don't cut the cord here. You have lost all leverage and you don't even know it. She knows she has you under her spell and will utilize this advantage to its fullest extent, you aren't dealing with some naive cub in the forrest but a full blown tiger that smells blood.

 

[Manure Spherian]

As

1. I don’t do relationships - she will try harder
2. Cheat all you want, Idgaf.
3. How much do I make? How much does she weigh?
4. If she has social media - she cheats. See Item 2.
5. If she needs to discuss something important - don’t call or text me! I’m not her girlfriend.
6. Men and women can’t be friends. Refer again to Line 2.
7. Take as much time as you need because I don’t care and never will. Forgot about her already.

This guy is looking for a wife obviously. Does 2 apply to such a situation.

 

[Divorced w 3]

OP you are seemingly going to learn a very hard and expensive lesson if you don't cut the cord here. You have lost all leverage and you don't even know it. She knows she has you under her spell and will utilize this advantage to its fullest extent, you aren't dealing with some naive cub in the forrest but a full blown tiger that smells blood.

She works three blocks from where she lives. She has no drivers license. She is going to travel 90-120 minutes on public transit from another state, get a license in an address from another state, and lose access to her apartment by putting a tenant in it.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

This sounds good to on paper, but do let me know where this attractive girls are, who "naturaly conform to reasonable expectations, without any direction at all"

All females require a little direction in the current climate.. Unless you got a time machine and can transport yourself back to 1950s

How & what will she naturally conform to, if she is completely oblivious to what your expectations are?

Nah, even back then stuff happened, it was just under the radar and kept "in house" because of the societal disgrace and ostracizing it would bring on both parties.

So many stories come out of what actually happened in those relationships and how many stayed together "for show" as those people got elderly and one passed.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

She works three blocks from where she lives. She has no drivers license. She is going to travel 90-120 minutes on public transit from another state, get a license in an address from another state, and lose access to her apartment by putting a tenant in it.

Do you understand the ramifications of her establishing residency at your apartment/house?

After 2 weeks you basically have to go thru the court if you own the property to get her out if things go bad and she refuses to leave.

If you are renting the only thing you could do is ask the landlord to evict but they would have to evict everyone in the house(aka YOU), you cannot do singular evictions.

 

[Divorced w 3]

Do you understand the ramifications of her establishing residency at your apartment/house?

After 2 weeks you basically have to go thru the court if you own the property to get her out if things go bad and she refuses to leave.

If you are renting the only thing you could do is ask the landlord to evict but they would have to evict everyone in the house(aka YOU), you cannot do singular evictions.

Takes longer than that but yes I understand

 

[Divorced w 3]

Wait, I’m a trained paralegal with a pile of family law case background.

$125,000 in litigation fees? Oh I know exactly what that means.

Custody was likely at issue. (Probably a gross understatement).

You’re losing to these low value women, my guy.

Let’s talk about your boy and Rollo, then I’ll circle back to your litigation history.

Your boy is right and wrong. His is right about the mirror. He is wrong about your status.

When you look in the mirror, it’s only You v. You. Everything and everyone is just in your way.

Move them out of your way.

Single dads and Single moms are not the same.

Single dads are praised for the smallest things. They provide, guide and keep families safe. The gah dam heroes. Not all, but enough.

All Single moms are low hanging fruit. I realize the woman in question is not one but I say this so you know that you are far superior to any of them. They drain resources and can damage a man beyond recognition.

Sure, I was hurt by a few. I was but younger than you. Then Rollo…

Try not to thing of Rollo-the man. Think of only his work as a guide.

His work stems from a man like you. I don’t know your divorce story but the one Rollo tells is of a man who had the trophy wife, kids and life. The wife left him after this man did everything “right.” Shortly thereafter, he self-deleted. Enter “The Rational Male”.

Don’t think of his work in terms of right or wrong. Think of it as a guide.

Any veteran here reading this post can see clearly that you have “oneitis”- A virus that is infecting you, your family and your future.

It’s an interesting post and I do commend you for sharing.

Let’s get back to court, shall we?

Because that’s exactly where you’re gonna live.

Notice of Motion and Motion to Modify Custody and Parenting Time…Ex Parte.

Temporary Motion to Suspend Parenting Time and Custody [GRANTED].

Motion for Supervised Visitation at a Visitation Center (paid by you).

Motion to Modify Child Support.

These are the notices your attorney will receive because you messed around with wrong woman and have resisted the red pill lense.

I see the commenters showing you how this woman leaving your family will be hard on the kids and you are acknowledging that.

Truth is, they (and you) seemingly have no idea how bad this could get.

Do you think that this woman won’t be entered as witness against you regarding any family law matter should the relationship go south?

Never believe what a woman says. In text or otherwise. Believe her behavior.

Never let her move in. Doing so is going full ratard.

On that note, what are you going to do if she lives with you but cheated on you? Throw her out? Let me know how that goes.. and let me know how it feels being forced to let her stay while she drips of another man’s chowder in your home.

What happens if you get into an argument and she alleges DV while living with you?

I know the answer, but do you?

The woman you marry and the woman you divorce are 2 totally different women.

Same holds true in these circumstances and you won’t know until it’s too late.

Some men like to complicate their lives with this drama when they should focus on their overall success.

To each their own I guess.

I appreciate your points. I’m not saying you’re not making some seriously valid points. Having her called as a witness made the hair on the back of my neck stand up.

Be honest, is it safe to say that you are really, really scorned because you got absolutely burned in your divorce?

You don’t know all of my backstory- I filed - I alleged DV - I had evidence - I can go on but sitting at office.

May help to have the full story before assuming the man got hosed and running a complete mental marathon on a foundation that you are dead wrong on.

I have assistants too, and maybe they go online and pretend they do my job but they certainly don’t actually do my job.

Also, ‘do as I say not as I do’, ie Rollo, is never going to be a good argument to make with anyone with a straight face.

Maybe you’re the one hearing what you need to hear, did it ever occur to you that a guy is feeding you bait to keep you buying and coming to his products because you’re the one that got burned? It’s easy to see the bad in a situation, and the more you consume directly or through page views, the more he makes on it.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Takes longer than that but yes I understand

Depends on the state. In some it is as little as a week(7 consecutive nights). Others are any 14 days in a 6 month period or simply 14 days.

Hopefully you aren't in one of those states.

 

[FMCSMT]

I appreciate your points. I’m not saying you’re not making some seriously valid points. Having her called as a witness made the hair on the back of my neck stand up.

Be honest, is it safe to say that you are really, really scorned because you got absolutely burned in your divorce?

You don’t know all of my backstory- I filed - I alleged DV - I had evidence - I can go on but sitting at office.

May help to have the full story before assuming the man got hosed and running a complete mental marathon on a foundation that you are dead wrong on.

I have assistants too, and maybe they go online and pretend they do my job but they certainly don’t actually do my job.

Also, ‘do as I say not as I do’, ie Rollo, is never going to be a good argument to make with anyone with a straight face.

Maybe you’re the one hearing what you need to hear, did it ever occur to you that a guy is feeding you bait to keep you buying and coming to his products because you’re the one that got burned? It’s easy to see the bad in a situation, and the more you consume directly or through page views, the more he makes on it.

Every Blue-Pill that I have ever encountered that has heard my position on protecting himself, his family and his future has concluded that I must have been burned in divorce and live a scorned post-divorce life.

It is true, I loved my wife very much. Hottest girl in high school by far. My brother still says today “dam, you had a hot wife”. Married 11, together for 17. Divorced for 9 and our oldest graduates this spring.

She had only been with one other guy. Back then, 1 was a very low body count in high school. We were all test driving different models and I was experienced by the time I got to my future wife, ultimate score, king status supreme achievement absolutely acquired. 10/10, church girl way out in the country, parents married and successful business owners, stopped traffic wherever she went and she was never cognizant of her good looks. Yelled off any man that advanced her because “she has a man”. Lol. Man, if you could get them like that again…

The key to landing these girls and making them obsessed was getting them there the first time.

Do you remember the first time you slept this girl? Did she get there?

Mission was a success but I overachieved and it’s true that I still pay for my success today, 9 years post divorce. Every 4-6 months, litigation papers arrive at my attorney’s office.

It is also true, that I love freedom so much more than I ever loved my wife.

Rollo’s work freed my mind.

His book was given to me as gift. That work saved my life and much more.

I no longer have to dodge bullets, because I am ready and I don’t have to.

There were no further contributions to Rollo. I seen him on some podcasts/YT channels long after I used what I learned to grow who I am and thought to myself “no way. This guy?!”.

I don’t care if a toad wrote “The Rational Male”. If the strategy proves substantial success then I believe I would be a fool to not apply it.

Regarding women today, you could me put in virtually any environment in the presence of women and point to the one that you challenge me to sarge. If there’s not a larger man than I claiming her in the present moment, hold my beer.

I could take your girl and sleep with her in under 24 hours.

If that bothers you, it shouldn’t. Not at all. Even when it’s true.

You know those times when she doesn’t conform exactly or still gives you gut hits that maybe something doesn’t smell right in Delaware and you get upset, and your kids see you upset.

And you treat them differently because you’re upset.

Maybe you snap at them once.

Maybe you tell them that your head isn’t in the right place, in so many words.

Maybe you feel you have to get away from them for a minute so you can think about how you’re going to deal with this girl.

It’s most likely all of the above.

That’s what should bother you.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Yeah I remember the first time I had a beer too!

 

[Bethatsocialguy]

Are you saying body count matters?

The biggest red flag for me is, single at age 33...

Why is no man willing to wife her up..
Why are her previous relationships failing..

Body count absolutely matters. The higher the body count the more likely her self-esteem is which means the more male validation she will need in order to feel supposedly satisfied. It's kind of like a drug addict. She will connect validation with sex and over time the worries/risks/concerns that surround sex which SHOULD make women selective disappear. That's why prostitutes end up alone, hooked on drugs or dead.

 

[Bethatsocialguy]

Also the fact that you are unsure after multiple people have told you that there are bad signs shows you're looking at this situation not from an abundance mindset as you should. I get to go out and look for another woman is difficult but staying with her is the easiest thing to do but definitely the wrong decision

 

[Gamisch]

Every Blue-Pill that I have ever encountered that has heard my position on protecting himself, his family and his future has concluded that I must have been burned in divorce and live a scorned post-divorce life.

It is true, I loved my wife very much. Hottest girl in high school by far. My brother still says today “dam, you had a hot wife”. Married 11, together for 17. Divorced for 9 and our oldest graduates this spring.

She had only been with one other guy. Back then, 1 was a very low body count in high school. We were all test driving different models and I was experienced by the time I got to my future wife, ultimate score, king status supreme achievement absolutely acquired. 10/10, church girl way out in the country, parents married and successful business owners, stopped traffic wherever she went and she was never cognizant of her good looks. Yelled off any man that advanced her because “she has a man”. Lol. Man, if you could get them like that again…

The key to landing these girls and making them obsessed was getting them there the first time.

Do you remember the first time you slept this girl? Did she get there?

Mission was a success but I overachieved and it’s true that I still pay for my success today, 9 years post divorce. Every 4-6 months, litigation papers arrive at my attorney’s office.

It is also true, that I love freedom so much more than I ever loved my wife.

Rollo’s work freed my mind.

His book was given to me as gift. That work saved my life and much more.

I no longer have to dodge bullets, because I am ready and I don’t have to.

There were no further contributions to Rollo. I seen him on some podcasts/YT channels long after I used what I learned to grow who I am and thought to myself “no way. This guy?!”.

I don’t care if a toad wrote “The Rational Male”. If the strategy proves substantial success then I believe I would be a fool to not apply it.

Regarding women today, you could me put in virtually any environment in the presence of women and point to the one that you challenge me to sarge. If there’s not a larger man than I claiming her in the present moment, hold my beer.

I could take your girl and sleep with her in under 24 hours.

If that bothers you, it shouldn’t. Not at all. Even when it’s true.

You know those times when she doesn’t conform exactly or still gives you gut hits that maybe something doesn’t smell right in Delaware and you get upset, and your kids see you upset.

And you treat them differently because you’re upset.

Maybe you snap at them once.

Maybe you tell them that your head isn’t in the right place, in so many words.

Maybe you feel you have to get away from them for a minute so you can think about how you’re going to deal with this girl.

It’s most likely all of the above.

That’s what should bother you.

This.

It should bother you that this woman costs you basically a driver license, study plan and a vacation to wherever FOR YOUR KIDS .

No p00sy is worth that much. The mental ,physical and financial energy she took away from you should wake you the FECK up.

 

[Divorced w 3]

This.

It should bother you that this woman costs you basically a driver license, study plan and a vacation to wherever FOR YOUR KIDS .

No p00sy is worth that much. The mental ,physical and financial energy she took away from you should wake you the FECK up.

Who cost me a drivers license or sacrificed a trip for my children? I think you misunderstood what happened then and now. I told her point blank that last year was an anomaly, that I did it for myself, and that if she’s interested in doing this moving forward she can come out my way each and every time.

my kids and my peace of mind are okay. my side hustle hit 50% of annual target yesterday in the second week of the year - I recovered almost all my legal yesterday in commission, I acted like it was another day at the office and she just shot me $150 for Costco for mutual goods. Whatever doubt I had about what I did and how I’m doing it officially left the station last night.

I appreciate everyone’s input. Literally the best advice I got was to put my needs on direction out on the table and say take it or leave it. I did that, and I’m glad it was a good thought experiment for the board. I don’t have too many concerns at this point.

 

[Divorced w 3]

Also the fact that you are unsure after multiple people have told you that there are bad signs shows you're looking at this situation not from an abundance mindset as you should. I get to go out and look for another woman is difficult but staying with her is the easiest thing to do but definitely the wrong decision

I could have had sex with two good looking different women last week, both under the age of 30, a 23 year old asked me if I was 30 (I’m 39), respectfully I understand the abundance mindset

 

[Divorced w 3]

Body count absolutely matters. The higher the body count the more likely her self-esteem is which means the more male validation she will need in order to feel supposedly satisfied. It's kind of like a drug addict. She will connect validation with sex and over time the worries/risks/concerns that surround sex which SHOULD make women selective disappear. That's why prostitutes end up alone, hooked on drugs or dead.

I think you have it backwards. If they can’t nail a guy down it probably works against their self esteem not for it.