Advice from the old lady:
No wonder some of you guys struggle. I know some incels. They are without exception socially awkward/weird and unattractive. Look. If you are giving off a weird vibe it’s like body odor. It reeks.
It’s repulsive. But in the incel’s arrogance he fails to see his repulsiveness. He thinks he’s somehow better than the men who have success (who he loathes), and that contributes to the creepiness.
And he is so negative and self defeating that he cannot be reasoned with. He is an unbearable know-it-all who is a slave to his pov and his inaccurate beliefs, which is his religion.
We have some of that around here, certainly.
The problem
@Jesse Pinkman is that these guys cannot recognize the problems of their own creation. Like
@Pierce.Manhammer and
@BackInTheGame78 refer to these are guys who see the landscape, complain bitterly but do NOTHING to change. Then they blame women and society and anything else because that’s easier than taking an honest stock in the mirror.
A few years ago I lived in a room share situation in a 2M house with a casita. My roommate in the bedroom next to mine was an older man on kidney dialysis. He had a grown daughter, was long divorced, smoked like a chimney and had never been handsome in his life. He was interesting & smart but his health was failing & he was retired doing online horse betting & Id say he was very MGTOW. He’d been there, done that, got the T shirt, over it, accepted that. Not interested in women. Friendly and cool. Worried that the homeowner’s live in BF was taking advantage of her. Kept to himself but cool person.
The dude who lived in the casita was your classic incel. He was a 35yo at home computer professional, no car, ordered pizza constantly, lived like a hermit. We never saw him unless the homeowner threw a barbecue out back at the pool, he was weird, never looked you in the eye, but made good money and could have had decent looks if he wasn’t so sloppy looking and awkward.
One day at a summer meal out by the pool he announced that he was running for Congress. He was serious and had submitted his candidacy. My BF at the time and I were stunned. This guy had zero social skills and was not likable at all and yet thought he was going to be a politician. He talked more at that meal than I’d heard him speak the whole 2.5 years I lived there. He was intelligent and had some decent ideas but was still creepy and awkward AF.
Unsurprisingly his bid for Congress went nowhere. He was NOT likeable & didn’t seem to realize that (or thought that shouldn’t matter or didn’t matter, not sure which).
Here’s what I tell my kids:
The world does not give a shjt about you, and owes you nothing. You are not entitled to a woman. You have to attract them, which means you have to be attractive, which isn’t just a looks thing.
I was the hot blond sorority girl, was a sorority officer in fact for 3 years, I was pre-Med, social, popular, in student government and from a prominent family in an affluent area. Excellence was expected of me by my family. The “normies” and the awkward hermits had no chance. They were invisible.
I do think the coddling of a generation has had deleterious effects, but it is up to individual men to rise above that with an honest look in the mirror.
Those friends of
@IKO69 are not lost yet, they are mostly afraid. Encourage them to take up activities that expose them socially to women like tennis or yoga or wine enthusiast.
The problem with the incels here spouting all this negativity and AWALT and having this faulty belief system is that it misinforms men who are actually trying to grow, change and improve. I mean if a guy sticks around long enough he ought to be smart enough to spot the posers who are talking out their ass, but it is what it is. The intelligence of the audience must be assumed if they hang around at all.
An entitlement attitude, which the incel running for Congress had, gets you utterly nowhere.