What to do?

[anour]

DJ’s

I have a question. I keep getting these instances while flirting with chicks that goes like this after talking back and forth. Context met this girl at the gym approached her closed her insta then the text convo was like this.

my question is when i say some double meaning **** (sexual innuendo) and the girl asks me what do you mean with that? (100% sure she knows what i’m speaking about), do i say it to her bluntly what i mean or play it safe to not sound “creepy/desperate/needy or what not”. I genuinely feel if you play it safe you miss the oppurtunity and not sound as confident, but i wanna hear some other opinions.

 

[anour]

@Dr.Suave @BillyPilgrim @BackInTheGame78 @Serenity @We_ArE_VeNOM @RazorRambo24 @Giovanni SouthSide @Gamisch @Jesse Pinkman

 

[Millard Fillmore]

Don't explain or answer the question. Ignore it and change the subject. Then dial back the messages and just make the plan to meet.

Remember, you want to be in her cooch, not in her "close friends" stories as a screen shot.

 

[manfrombelow]

Just ask her out of the gym environment. You chat-chit too much and she already knew you're simping over her. Just ask her out.

You should never haven messed with women at your gym where you frequent, because at the end of the day, you don't want to stop going there just because things didn't work out between the two of you. It's equivalent to hitting on workplace women.

 

[Bingo-Player]

OP why are you sending 3 paragraphs of text against her one sentence / one word answers ?

This is really really basic stuff

The entire conversation screams to her " I AM DESPERATE TO BANG YOU" , " PLEASE LET ME HAVE SEX WITH YOU"

This is where a lot of guys fall down when messaging women

they reveal way too much , too quickly and it all becomes a big cringey mess the woman can't wait to disappear from

I suspect its too late , but stop messaging her before you do any more damage

 

[anour]

Don't explain or answer the question. Ignore it and change the subject. Then dial back the messages and just make the plan to meet.

Remember, you want to be in her cooch, not in her "close friends" stories as a screen shot.

100%, texting to setup the date got it

 

[anour]

Just ask her out of the gym environment. You chat-chit too much and she already knew you're simping over her. Just ask her out.

You should never haven messed with women at your gym where you frequent, because at the end of the day, you don't want to stop going there just because things didn't work out between the two of you. It's equivalent to hitting on workplace women.

If i ask her out like directly in 1-2 messages it’s gonna be too direct don’t you think? Are there any specific messages that screams “simping”?

 

[anour]

OP why are you sending 3 paragraphs of text against her one sentence / one word answers ?

This is really really basic stuff

The entire conversation screams to her " I AM DESPERATE TO BANG YOU" , " PLEASE LET ME HAVE SEX WITH YOU"

This is where a lot of guys fall down when messaging women

they reveal way too much , too quickly and it all becomes a big cringey mess the woman can't wait to disappear from

I suspect its too late , but stop messaging her before you do any more damage

How’d you personally approach it? If i ask her out like directly in 1-2 messages it’s gonna be too direct don’t you think? Are there any specific messages that screams “simping”?

 

[anour]

!!

 

[BackInTheGame78]

How’d you personally approach it? If i ask her out like directly in 1-2 messages it’s gonna be too direct don’t you think? Are there any specific messages that screams “simping”?

I usually send 3-4 messages for OLD and then ask if they'd like to connect in person. If it's a positive answer I offer to exchange numbers. This works like 95% of the time.

Then after a few texts I set up the date. Simple as that. There is no need to try and make this like rocket science or quantum physics, this is more like simple addition, ie 1+1=2 in terms of how complex or complicated it is.

 

[pipeman84]

OP, cut the messaging, interact and build rapport in real life. I think just by this fact alone you'll stand out in the girls mind ... all the other clueless guys always on the phone, messaging, trying to be witty, funny, you be the one who uses the phone only to arrange dates/meeting in real life (for instance to meet at the gym).

 

[Barrister]

OP,

Way too much texting coming from you. Not only the volume of texts, but the vibe of them makes you sound like some puppy dog about ready to burst from his excitement that he is getting to talk to this chick. Dial way back the amount of texts and also be much more aloof in the texts. Remember, texting is only to set up a date in early stage dating.

 

[Bingo-Player]

Women are masters of the subtext which is why it is generally advised to just use messaging too arrange dates because the chances of most guys messaging themselves into trouble is very very high

If you can put a cap on the excitement / romantic comedy lines and learn how to communicate with them in "womanise" you will get better and more consistent results

Women usually know within a handful of messages what type of guy you are and what category to put you in

Keep it mysterious and make it difficult for her.

 

[inquisitor]

DJ’s

I have a question. I keep getting these instances while flirting with chicks that goes like this after talking back and forth. Context met this girl at the gym approached her closed her insta then the text convo was like this.

my question is when i say some double meaning **** (sexual innuendo) and the girl asks me what do you mean with that? (100% sure she knows what i’m speaking about), do i say it to her bluntly what i mean or play it safe to not sound “creepy/desperate/needy or what not”. I genuinely feel if you play it safe you miss the oppurtunity and not sound as confident, but i wanna hear some other opinions.

Since you two meet at the gym, compliments are better served in person. There is no one-size-fits-all advice for texting that works for all women and in all contexts.

Also remember that you're not in this forum to seem like this type of guy, or avoid sounding like that type of guy. You're here to learn what works for you, not to just appear as someone that she might like. This isn't about theatrics, and people here are certainly not texting experts - what you see are suggestions based on experience.

 

[Millard Fillmore]

How’d you personally approach it? If i ask her out like directly in 1-2 messages it’s gonna be too direct don’t you think? Are there any specific messages that screams “simping”?

Just think of an activity, like a free outdoor concert or shooting pool at a bar. Say "I'm going to X thing on Y date, if you want to join me." Whether she replies/accepts or not, go anyway. If she doesn't reply hit up a buddy to join you. You should have the mentality of "I'm going to this thing to have fun."

If you're wondering which of YOUR messages sounded simpy, when you said "Let's find out together" it was a little desperate and giving off borderline boyfriend vibes. But don't sweat it, pick a thing for her to join you and set it up. As others said, don't overthink, keep it simple. That's simpLE. Haha.

 

[anour]

I usually send 3-4 messages for OLD and then ask if they'd like to connect in person. If it's a positive answer I offer to exchange numbers. This works like 95% of the time.

Then after a few texts I set up the date. Simple as that. There is no need to try and make this like rocket science or quantum physics, this is more like simple addition, ie 1+1=2 in terms of how complex or complicated it is.

Stupidly simple, got it.

 

[anour]

OP, cut the messaging, interact and build rapport in real life. I think just by this fact alone you'll stand out in the girls mind ... all the other clueless guys always on the phone, messaging, trying to be witty, funny, you be the one who uses the phone only to arrange dates/meeting in real life (for instance to meet at the gym).

Got it my guy rapport in person > texting rapport

 

[anour]

OP,

Way too much texting coming from you. Not only the volume of texts, but the vibe of them makes you sound like some puppy dog about ready to burst from his excitement that he is getting to talk to this chick. Dial way back the amount of texts and also be much more aloof in the texts. Remember, texting is only to set up a date in early stage dating.

What do you mean by aloof? How can i be aloof in texting? Is being aloof only applicable to texting and/or in-life interactions?

 

[anour]

Since you two meet at the gym, compliments are better served in person. There is no one-size-fits-all advice for texting that works for all women and in all contexts.

Also remember that you're not in this forum to seem like this type of guy, or avoid sounding like that type of guy. You're here to learn what works for you, not to just appear as someone that she might like. This isn't about theatrics, and people here are certainly not texting experts - what you see are suggestions based on experience.

I like your mindset on how to approach things, quite useful like snoop said “who can be you but you?”

 

[anour]

Just think of an activity, like a free outdoor concert or shooting pool at a bar. Say "I'm going to X thing on Y date, if you want to join me." Whether she replies/accepts or not, go anyway. If she doesn't reply hit up a buddy to join you. You should have the mentality of "I'm going to this thing to have fun."

If you're wondering which of YOUR messages sounded simpy, when you said "Let's find out together" it was a little desperate and giving off borderline boyfriend vibes. But don't sweat it, pick a thing for her to join you and set it up. As others said, don't overthink, keep it simple. That's simpLE. Haha.

Absolute gold, giving out abundance mindset tipsnis gold.