How to differentiate between a shy & disinterested girl

bat soup

bat soup

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anour said:
Hello everybody,

Context:
i enter the bus i see this beautiful girl i pass her by, then comeback ask her can i sit here. She says yes, i ask her where are you going to? She replies “school” i ask her what she does, she replies nursing, to which i say i like nurses but i don’t like hospitals. Then out of nowhere she puts the phone on her ear, i read that as i’m trying to act busy sign so don’t bother me (different perspective is she is listening to a voice note). After she puts the phone on her ear, i get up Wish her a good day then leave.

Then when she leaves, another girl who was sitting in the chair beside her looks at me & starts shaking her head. The question is how can you differentiate between a shy girl and uninterested girl? I had a feeling that she was merely shy
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A shy girl won't approach you but may give some subtle signs of interest and will be happy when you approach her. A disinterested girl will make zero effort to maintain a conversation and/or actively cokblock you in the way that you described.
 
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anour said:
Hello everybody,

Context:
i enter the bus i see this beautiful girl i pass her by, then comeback ask her can i sit here. She says yes, i ask her where are you going to? She replies “school” i ask her what she does, she replies nursing, to which i say i like nurses but i don’t like hospitals. Then out of nowhere she puts the phone on her ear, i read that as i’m trying to act busy sign so don’t bother me (different perspective is she is listening to a voice note). After she puts the phone on her ear, i get up Wish her a good day then leave.

Then when she leaves, another girl who was sitting in the chair beside her looks at me & starts shaking her head. The question is how can you differentiate between a shy girl and uninterested girl? I had a feeling that she was merely shy
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Good you posted this.
1. You pass by and then come back. -> You took inititative. But you put yourself in a weak position voluntarily. You coming back is desperate and devalueing to yourself. Next time, let the opportunity go. If you would pass her another time, you could recognize her and make eye contact.
2. "school" -> one word, closed answer, not interested. Leave it at that.
3. "I like nurses but I don't like hospitals" -> who the fvck cares? Why should she care about what you like when you don't show interest in her?
 
Murk

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Passing by and coming back was creepy in of itself, you should have casually asked to sit straight away and it would be a bit more normal. I say a bit more, because you should never ask someone if you can sit on public transport, it's public transport and the clue is in the name, if there is space you sit, providing there aren't plenty of open seats closer, then it's weird. I'm hoping there wasn't rows of empty seats and you go to box this girl in, even a chad will have a hard time pulling that off on a bus without seeming weird.

The fact you passed her and came back (I'm assuming this bus was semi-full otherwise you're a menace) would put all onlookers/passengers on high alert, everyone has clocked you go stalk mode on this hot young girl and make weird convo. I'm having second-hand embarrassment just visualising it.
 
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The OP is clearly autistic if he thought that whatever he experienced is shyness

If the girls likes you she would smile and/or be talkative when you do the approach, otherwise she is not interested

Someone to be shy like being “afraid to talk” or something is more like pre-school kids, not something that people 18+ do ( unless she has mental problems or something )

OP, if I were you I would definitely read Paul eckerman books about how to decipher expressions and micro expressions
 
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ThisIsSparta

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anour said:
Hello everybody,

Context:
i enter the bus i see this beautiful girl i pass her by, then comeback ask her can i sit here. She says yes, i ask her where are you going to? She replies “school” i ask her what she does, she replies nursing, to which i say i like nurses but i don’t like hospitals. Then out of nowhere she puts the phone on her ear, i read that as i’m trying to act busy sign so don’t bother me (different perspective is she is listening to a voice note). After she puts the phone on her ear, i get up Wish her a good day then leave.

Then when she leaves, another girl who was sitting in the chair beside her looks at me & starts shaking her head. The question is how can you differentiate between a shy girl and uninterested girl? I had a feeling that she was merely shy
Click to expand...
Hitting on a girl in a bus might not be the best place.

There might be friends and/or colleagues around which the target in question has to play it cool for.

She might also be uncomfortable talking openly about personal shyt in a bus where everone in 5 Meters can overhear your conversation.

I know you most likely only have that chance on the bus unless you stalk her to the point where she exits the bus but that could be seen as creepy too.

From my view you havent done anything dramatically wrong...... maybe she wasnt interested or maybe it was wrong time, wrong place.
 
We_ArE_VeNOM

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BackInTheGame78 said:
They actually do it all the time. Maybe you should pay attention more.
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Well, maybe they do.

I don't stick around long enough for all the theatrics.

I'm in & out...like a thief in the night. :cool:
 
devilkingx2

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anour said:
The question is how can you differentiate between a shy girl and uninterested girl?
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There's a girl I know that tells me about how introverted and anti-social she is every time I talk to her, in great detail, starting from her childhood.

And then, after explaining that she doesn't like giving out her number to people because it's private, she offers me her number (maybe she knew I wouldn't ask if she just said that she doesn't like giving it to people lol) and tells me to text her anytime.

She also said that she always declines and never goes when people ask her to hang out... And then she said that we should hang out.

So that's what a shy girl looks like when she likes you, in my opinion.
 
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devilkingx2 said:
There's a girl I know that tells me about how introverted and anti-social she is every time I talk to her, in great detail, starting from her childhood.

And then, after explaining that she doesn't like giving out her number to people because it's private, she offers me her number (maybe she knew I wouldn't ask if she just said that she doesn't like giving it to people lol) and tells me to text her anytime.

She also said that she always declines and never goes when people ask her to hang out... And then she said that we should hang out.

So that's what a shy girl looks like when she likes you, in my opinion.
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sounds like trouble
 
devilkingx2

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devilkingx2

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anour said:
How did i insult her? This is the line “i like doctors but not hospitals though … pause for a few seconds, and say hospitals are very depressing, but doctors look at you”
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I think that sounds too wordy and long if I imagine saying it out loud.

I would've went with something like "hospitals can be depressing, but doctors? Wow look at you"
 
nismo-4

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Shy my ass.

Women are shy? Ha! Women are either interested or uninterested.

Shy woman in 2023? Bull stuff. She's likely on Insta messaging some dude in the NFL.

Anything other than a yes, complete with the actions to back it up, is a no.

Case closed.
 
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Bigpapa said:
The OP is clearly autistic if he thought that whatever he experienced is shyness

If the girls likes you she would smile and/or be talkative when you do the approach, otherwise she is not interested

Someone to be shy like being “afraid to talk” or something is more like pre-school kids, not something that people 18+ do ( unless she has mental problems or something )

OP, if I were you I would definitely read Paul eckerman books about how to decipher expressions and micro expressions
Click to expand...
There are women that have really bad social skills that don't really know how to act with men that are approaching them. This has more to do with overall social awkwardness but with the added caveat of their being pressure placed upon them, which is a man approaching them.

With that said, I think a man is much better off just avoiding women who are act like this with him or cutting off the interaction very early on.
 
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