Are your 30s too old to enjoy a "cougar"?

[Jesse Pinkman]

I know the vibe goes that Cougars are older women who are into younger guys and a lot of dudes consider 30s to still be young enough. So if you are a guy in his 30s dating or having flings with women in their 40s, is that still counting as getting with a cougar or is the whole cougar thing more for super young guys like those in college or those in high schools where the horny teachers get busted?

 

[Murk]

I feel 26 still and look in my 20s, so for me anything a few years older is cougar territory. I desire older women WAY less now though, not worth the effort unless they put NSA on a plate for me.

 

[Young OG]

I know the vibe goes that Cougars are older women who are into younger guys and a lot of dudes consider 30s to still be young enough. So if you are a guy in his 30s dating or having flings with women in their 40s, is that still counting as getting with a cougar or is the whole cougar thing more for super young guys like those in college or those in high schools where the horny teachers get busted?

I don’t think there are rules but if you’re in your 30s and she’s in her 40s, then I wouldn’t consider her a cougar. If you were in your 20s then yes. Also, it’s your life but I wouldn’t want to bang used up old hags.

 

[SW15]

There are men in their 30s who have sex with women 10+ years older who are in their 40s and maybe even early 50s.

There's one key question: Why?

Having sex with older women in your 30s isn't the same as having sex with older women in your 20s. It's a bigger waste of time, it's not as exciting, and the older women are often not as good looking.

A lot of men are in a better competitive spot in their 30s than in their 20s. Men in their 30s are better positioned to compete for 20 something women (especially men 30-34) than men in their 20s, especially 20-24 year old men. It's understandable why a 20-24 year old guy who isn't doing well with women his own age might go for a 30s/early 40s woman for a short term sexual relationships. It's not understandable at all why a guy would do this at any time in his 30s. The opportunity cost is too high.

When a man is 18-24, it's exciting to get with some experienced, 30 something or even 40 something woman. Some of these women still look good and don't have any long term expectations. At 18-24, you're still young enough to do something like this for 6-12 months and not have it impact life long term.

A 21 year old man having sex with a 35 year old woman isn't as good as a 31 year old having sex with a 45 year old woman. The woman is not as good looking at 45 as she was at 35 and the man is more grown up at 31 than 21. The older woman, gaining experience, mommy type fetish is something that needs to be in the past for 30 something men.

For 25-29 year old men, they are well positioned to have sex with women in their primes of 20-24. 30-34 year old men won't have that much of a problem getting a slightly younger woman by 3-5 years and still get in some good years. A 38 year old man is going to need more money to attract a 23-28 year old.

 

[EyeBRollin]

I banged a few cougars in my early-mid 20s. Once I hit about 27, cougars were no longer interested in me. Once I hit 30 it was easier to go younger than go 40+. Cougars like boys, not men.

Men, part of your appeal for a cougar is she wants to feel in control. She cannot feel that if you present as “established.”

 

[Jesse Pinkman]

There are men in their 30s who have sex with women 10+ years older who are in their 40s and maybe even early 50s.

There's one key question: Why?

Having sex with older women in your 30s isn't the same as having sex with older women in your 20s. It's a bigger waste of time, it's not as exciting, and the older women are often not as good looking.

A lot of men are in a better competitive spot in their 30s than in their 20s. Men in their 30s are better positioned to compete for 20 something women (especially men 30-34) than men in their 20s, especially 20-24 year old men. It's understandable why a 20-24 year old guy who isn't doing well with women his own age might go for a 30s/early 40s woman for a short term sexual relationships. It's not understandable at all why a guy would do this at any time in his 30s. The opportunity cost is too high.

When a man is 18-24, it's exciting to get with some experienced, 30 something or even 40 something woman. Some of these women still look good and don't have any long term expectations. At 18-24, you're still young enough to do something like this for 6-12 months and not have it impact life long term.

A 21 year old man having sex with a 35 year old woman isn't as good as a 31 year old having sex with a 45 year old woman. The woman is not as good looking at 45 as she was at 35 and the man is more grown up at 31 than 21. The older woman, gaining experience, mommy type fetish is something that needs to be in the past for 30 something men.

For 25-29 year old men, they are well positioned to have sex with women in their primes of 20-24. 30-34 year old men won't have that much of a problem getting a slightly younger woman by 3-5 years and still get in some good years. A 38 year old man is going to need more money to attract a 23-28 year old.

My life was more of the reverse. In my twenties, I did well with women also in their 20s and at times even college girls in NYC, especially some who were interning in the city. Come to think of it looking back, the oldest girl I ever got with in my twenties was like two years older than me but most girls were younger. I think I have a Benjamin Button situation going on where I was an old man in my twenties and now get younger.

I never related to guys saying women around their own age in their 20s are tough. However, I was socially adjusted to what these women wanted in their 20s (former Greek Life, in the same crowds, etc.). I find that MOST women in their 20s, especially popular college girls, go for guys around their age and ideally in the same circles. Most do not ***** themselves out to older guys unless money is an issue which for a lot of college girls that look good (and usually come from decent families), it is not.

Even now right dead at 30, I normally get with women younger than me or at the same age.

My vibe is also the reverse of serious, I come off as more fun and easygoing and younger women liked that.

I do however find college girls and women in their early 20s overrated. Too many crappy friends of theirs to deal with, too much partying, too much immaturity from their social circles, too much drama, too much having to guide her, and all that.

Its fun to see that we want what we cannot have. Lots of red pill dudes would kill to be in my shoes by getting younger women.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I banged a few cougars in my early-mid 20s. Once I hit about 27, cougars were no longer interested in me. Once I hit 30 it was easier to go younger than go 40+. Cougars like boys, not men.

Men, part of your appeal for a cougar is she wants to feel in control. She cannot feel that if you present as “established.”

Cougars want inexperienced guys they can "teach things to".

 

[SW15]

I never related to guys saying women around their own age in their 20s are tough. However, I was socially adjusted to what these women wanted in their 20s (former Greek Life, in the same crowds, etc.).

When I was 18-24, I found 18-24 year old women tough. 18-24 year old women are the women with the most demand. 18-24 year men want them, as do 45-55 year old men. The competition for 18-24 year old women is fierce. It's possible that many men had stronger social skills than I had then. Additionally, from 18-24, I was competing at a large public university known for its attractive female student body and it had a solid party scene. I've called my school "Hot Girl U" on here before. Part of the reason I chose to attend this school was for the attractive women. I've detailed some of those experiences in the thread below. After graduation from undergrad, I was 22-24 and competing for women in nightlife in a pretentious big city. Both experiences were tough. That is a consequence of environment.

Observations about college sex life from someone that went to a party school.

I thought I'd share this as someone who went to a party school and was in a fraternity there as well. Not wanting to give too much about myself but I went to UGA and graduated a few years ago. While Athens has its hot girls, I do feel like the quality got worse every year due to the admission...

www.sosuave.net

I find that MOST women in their 20s, especially popular college girls, go for guys around their age and ideally in the same circles. Most do not ***** themselves out to older guys unless money is an issue which for a lot of college girls that look good (and usually come from decent families), it is not.

I saw the same thing at my "Hot Girl U". Most of the top tier women at my "Hot Girl U" were going for guys on campus that could be called "Chads". Guys like Rollo and Rich Cooper would call these guys the "hot guys at the Ibiza/Cancun foam party".

18-23 year old undergrads are more into hot guys with good bodies in the same age range than wealthier 30+ guys. I rarely saw post college guys getting with women on my campus.

I find college girls and women in their early 20s overrated. Too many crappy friends of theirs to deal with, too much partying, too much immaturity from their social circles, too much drama, too much having to guide her, and all that.

Lots of red pill dudes would kill to be in my shoes by getting younger women.

There are some legitimate points in there. Guidance is important and a part of frame though. The partying, immaturity, and drama can be downsides, but the upsides are good bodies and a lack of jaded behaviors and baggage.

 

[Jesse Pinkman]

@SW15 From my experience, the competition may seem fierce for the 18-24 year old types but most guys just do not get what these girls want. The typical older guy is unrelatable and I have slept with these women who have shown me the amount of thirsty dudes who are older trying to get with them. Most older guys trying to game them are so out of touch that these women will only use them for the money and then bail. Certain kinds of older guys can do well with younger women but you won't find them in the red pill or pickup spaces, these older guys are either the bar owner or club owner that offers these girls the fun they want, the DJ/musician, or the older guy with a lot of edge to him that might work as a bouncer at a nightclub.

For most of these girls, you just need to be fun, in touch with what they want, not be a buzzkill, and have access to a lot of cool and fun stuff.

An angle I think older guys can play is being engrained into the fun that happens after college such as knowing the hottest nightclubs and the most exclusive parties. The older guys I knew that did that in NYC were swimming in hot girls in that age range that you speak about.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Stay away from my wife, Jesse

 

[BillyPilgrim]

@SW15 From my experience, the competition may seem fierce for the 18-24 year old types but most guys just do not get what these girls want.

Lol those girl are dumb

 

[Gamisch]

I know the vibe goes that Cougars are older women who are into younger guys and a lot of dudes consider 30s to still be young enough. So if you are a guy in his 30s dating or having flings with women in their 40s, is that still counting as getting with a cougar or is the whole cougar thing more for super young guys like those in college or those in high schools where the horny teachers get busted?

30,s is a strange place to be at for a lot of men.

You are young and perhaps attractive enough to feck literally every woman. 15-60 will give you ioi's , and both younger and older women might see you as "the catch".

Older women will make it clear they're aware of the age difference between you two. She knows if you woukd meet the younger version of her you would probably prefer that. She also knows that her younger self would also fall for you. Older women who're sleeping with younger men paying the price due living in constant scarcity.

So yes, it's definitely a cougar type of dynamic. Such a woman will look at you as the absolute prize. If she's also a nympo you'll get some hot nights.

 

[The Duke]

Do what ever turns you on. Don't worry about what others think when it comes to topics like this.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Just avoid the customers who are cougars Jesse, they tend to be used up.

 

[jaymbrs]

No but you’re getting close. I’m 36 and I would 100% hookup with our resident cougar @BeExcellent , no disrespect.

 

[Stanley]

a lot of dudes consider 30s to still be young enough.

A cougar is a cougar regardless of your age and I'd say 30 is young, but the cougsters want the more 'boyish' looking fellas and by 30's most guys look like men.

 

[2Rocky]

Jesse I think going into your 30's you are losing patience for the Young Girl BS...A woman in her 40's has determined for herself what she wants and she's not afraid to ask for it and she isn't seeking approval like some 21 yo who wants to be liked by everybody. She will slot herself as ONS or relationship right off the bat.

The only downside is that she's had her expectations shaped by 20 + years of relationships and dating, so you may find yourself competing with a ghost, or fulfilling her fantasy of a love she's never had. You better be able to hang with her on Financial savvy, and grown up stuff...while rocking her bedroom.

 

[Solomon]

There are men in their 30s who have sex with women 10+ years older who are in their 40s and maybe even early 50s.

There's one key question: Why?

Having sex with older women in your 30s isn't the same as having sex with older women in your 20s. It's a bigger waste of time, it's not as exciting, and the older women are often not as good looking.

A lot of men are in a better competitive spot in their 30s than in their 20s. Men in their 30s are better positioned to compete for 20 something women (especially men 30-34) than men in their 20s, especially 20-24 year old men. It's understandable why a 20-24 year old guy who isn't doing well with women his own age might go for a 30s/early 40s woman for a short term sexual relationships. It's not understandable at all why a guy would do this at any time in his 30s. The opportunity cost is too high.

When a man is 18-24, it's exciting to get with some experienced, 30 something or even 40 something woman. Some of these women still look good and don't have any long term expectations. At 18-24, you're still young enough to do something like this for 6-12 months and not have it impact life long term.

A 21 year old man having sex with a 35 year old woman isn't as good as a 31 year old having sex with a 45 year old woman. The woman is not as good looking at 45 as she was at 35 and the man is more grown up at 31 than 21. The older woman, gaining experience, mommy type fetish is something that needs to be in the past for 30 something men.

For 25-29 year old men, they are well positioned to have sex with women in their primes of 20-24. 30-34 year old men won't have that much of a problem getting a slightly younger woman by 3-5 years and still get in some good years. A 38 year old man is going to need more money to attract a 23-28 year old.

Why? cause there are some women in their 40s and 50s that make it easy that's why!
And Not sure where you live but I see some women in their 40s that look better than some chicks in their 20s (Gen Z women are overweight for the most part espeically on dating apps)
If you got Nicole on Tuesday she's 42 and just wants to have fun and order uber eats one day a week why not?
Most guys on this site are not in a position to be with younger women much less the younger women that they want
If guys focus on leveling up FOR REAL, this site wouldn't exist or it would be a bunch of guys bragging about their latest conquest

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Jesse I think going into your 30's you are losing patience for the Young Girl BS...A woman in her 40's has determined for herself what she wants and she's not afraid to ask for it and she isn't seeking approval like some 21 yo who wants to be liked by everybody. She will slot herself as ONS or relationship right off the bat.

The only downside is that she's had her expectations shaped by 20 + years of relationships and dating, so you may find yourself competing with a ghost, or fulfilling her fantasy of a love she's never had. You better be able to hang with her on Financial savvy, and grown up stuff...while rocking her bedroom.

So in other words, there's no upside to the 40-something you described. Why must we "better be able to hang?", Or is this just Canadian Conformity speaking?

 

[SW15]

Most guys on this site are not in a position to be with younger women much less the younger women that they want

For men 30-34, getting a younger woman in their 20s isn't too difficult. At 30-32 years old, it doesn't take that much to get a 27-29 year old girlfriend, though younger than 27 is more difficult. At 33-34, younger women start to enter their 30s and getting some 20 somethings is more difficult, especially under 27.

Men 35-39 are more common dating women in their early to mid 30s when they go younger. It takes a lot for a man 35-39 years old to get a woman 10+ years younger, and that's mostly in the form of a higher salary and net worth. Looks still matter, but women put more emphasis on a man's money when evaluating men 35+.

It's not a good deal for a 38-39 year old man to be dating a 35-36 year old single mom. Even childless 35-36 year old women often have mediocre, uninspiring bodies when they are naked and ready for sex in a lot of cases.

Most men in their 30s are vagina beggars for similarly aged women. They do most of their vagina begging on swipe apps now.