If you're not used to getting girls, but then you find one

[RazorRambo24]

She's most likely using you for emotional validation, as a rebound to get over an ex or scorned lover, or she just wants your attention.

This is something I Noticed people talk about all the itme.. its always guys who dont really get girls much but then they land one outta nowhere.. they feel like its the best thing that ever happened to them. but fail to realize tht if they're not used to getting girls, then why is this girl so special? Did God bless them with a miracle? or...

is she using you?

Telltale signs:
1) She talks about her ex or mentions her ex to you..
2) She keeps you guessing what you guys are and what shes looking for. She wont tell u if shes looking for something serious but sometimes she may tell u that shes not looking for anything serious.. but
3) her actions/behaviors confuse you.. because on one hand shes telling u shes not looking for anything serious, but you feel she treats you like a potential boyfriend/partner
4) she seems to get upset at you over little things, or is inconsistent in her behavior with you
5) it feels as if shes putting in the bare minimum effort with you.. not dressing up too nicely, wearing average everyday clothes around you or loungewear like pajamas and hoodies,
6) Her compliments and things she says to you seem disingenuous or overexaggerated. "oh my gosh u look so cute today! " "u always look soo handsome" "ur just a cutie arent u"

I see alot of posts on here that scream that a dude is being used.. Thus why they are usually so confused at everything and coming to a online forum for help.. I would say maybe 50-60% of all posts here from guys looking for help on a situation fall into this category.

The sad reality is this: If you're not used to pulling and piping.. a random girl falling into your lap who is genuinely there for you, is HIGHLY unlikely..

---- A short bit on why some guys just aren't pulling girls----
I personally believe its just due to not socializing enough and not having enough experience. Would you believe it if I told you 30% of guys don't even know how to smile at a woman to show them interest? Many guys cannot smile on cue. and many are simply unsure about their smile. Theres a percentage of guys that dont even have more than 1 or 2 friends.. Basically little to no social life.

If you take a look at the guys who are pulling tons of girls, piping a few on the regular , or those who land good relationships, They always have consistent emotional and social validation from friends or family.. Whether this be a group of friends they have had for years, co workers , family members, parents, siblings, -- This energy of social validation and love from peers/your social circle.. is the crucial energy in which we are able to connect with new people, and with the opposite sex. The opposite sex is no different than anyone else . the only thing is, alot of men LACK interaction with the opposite sex.. Why? because they believe silly sh.t like "you shouldnt have girls as friends".. or "i dont want a girlfriend i jus want to be a player!". then, guess what happens? They grow up a life without deep social interaction with women, and wonder why they can't seem to understand women.

 

[corrector]

Chads and even Chad-lites usually have a positive feed-back loop so these types of things are natural with them. Like you've said on your other posts, you have have no problems getting girls using tinder, while the average guy often gives up out of frustration of it just not connecting with anyone. Just on that level alone, if you are able to connect with more women online, then that's more practise of interaction and you have more opportunities to get better at your game socially. People lack interaction with the opposite sex because they are invisible to the opposite sex on sites like tinder, not because of they have any of the beliefs that you are saying.

Therefore, may I suggest that what you are saying is really making no sense at all and is just out of touch with how most people are navigating through life who are sub8s-normie tiers. For example, can you really show me where anyone is complaining that they are being friendzoned (which should be an outdated 00s term thrown into the dustbin of history), or complaining they don't want a girlfriend. It doesn't exist because its simply not true.

 

[RazorRambo24]

Chads and even Chad-lites usually have a positive feed-back loop so these types of things are natural with them. Like you've said on your other posts, you have have no problems getting girls using tinder, while the average guy often gives up out of frustration of it just not connecting with anyone. Just on that level alone, if you are able to connect with more women online, then that's more practise of interaction and you have more opportunities to get better at your game socially. People lack interaction with the opposite sex because they are invisible to the opposite sex on sites like tinder, not because of they have any of the beliefs that you are saying.

Therefore, may I suggest that what you are saying is really making no sense at all and is just out of touch with how most people are navigating through life who are sub8s-normie tiers. For example, can you really show me where anyone is complaining that they are being friendzoned (which should be an outdated 00s term thrown into the dustbin of history), or complaining they don't want a girlfriend. It doesn't exist because its simply not true.

The main point about this post is how alot of guys are being used as rebounds or temporary support systems until the girl just cans them and moves on. That def includes chads but the post is mainly referring to the guys who are not used to getting girls in the first place.. whereas chads have an abundance of women.. But often times might be more of the first choice of women looking to rebound with a guy who is sexy/chadlike just to get over -- but usually go for types they otherwise wouldn't be in a relationship with, so they can't get attached and hurt again by the 2nd guy. Sometimes rebounds aren't even about fully leaving or breaking up.. A guy can make a mistake, cheat on his girl and to get back at him, she might do the same. Regardless, when a woman really loves one man, she's not going to fall for the guy she used for temporary gratification/support/validation. They always categorize that man as almost a paper weight, and often times, when things are mended with their partners, looking back at that person can cause guilt or disgust.

The rest of what I'm saying is just what I noticed with guys who aren't really getting laid. I don't know too many personally anymore but you occasionally run into one or two online or at a bar or something and you hear their lifestory and you're just like ..damn this guy is lacking a social life and wondering why hes having issues with women. Some of these guys havent had a female in their life, even as a friend since childhood. So when they do have women in front of them? what do you get? a socially awkward moment which triggers red flags/alarm bells in the girls head and she freaks out and hits him with any of several excuses to get away from him.

and as an added note: Chads are not every womans first choice. Most girls will pass up on a guy who has it all going on because they fear he will ever be monogomous when hecan get any girl he wants. Some women are realistic about their standards and would not date a guy who they feel is out of their league. For a woman, every encounter/relationship is an emotional investment and her emotions are to be protected at all times. Thus women have alot of coping methods

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Virtually every date you go on a woman is going to mention something about their ex. It's meaningless.

 

[RazorRambo24]

Virtually every date you go on a woman is going to mention something about their ex. It's meaningless.

Theres alot more going on than someone just mentioning their ex. Its usually they frame the start of their convo with you about their ex and almost framing their whole interaction/relationship with you based on their ex did them wrong or how horrible their ex is. This is a big red flag too.. very commonly known.

Now when you go on a regular date with someone, its socially known that bringing up an ex is a no go/bad. There's probably 10,000 articles about specifically not doing this, catered to both women and men.

If you are going out with dates and almost every one, girls are mentioning their ex, idk what to tell you.. I'm curious as to what their saying actually.. "my ex wsa so nice he was so sweet, i miss him dearly" or "my ex was trash, he never let me do this, do that, he did this to me".. both are red flags bud. Its almost never a good thing when girls bring up their ex to **** on them or to praise them.

 

[bat soup]

She's most likely using you for emotional validation, as a rebound to get over an ex or scorned lover, or she just wants your attention.

This is something I Noticed people talk about all the itme.. its always guys who dont really get girls much but then they land one outta nowhere.. they feel like its the best thing that ever happened to them. but fail to realize tht if they're not used to getting girls, then why is this girl so special? Did God bless them with a miracle? or...

is she using you?

Telltale signs:
1) She talks about her ex or mentions her ex to you..
2) She keeps you guessing what you guys are and what shes looking for. She wont tell u if shes looking for something serious but sometimes she may tell u that shes not looking for anything serious.. but
3) her actions/behaviors confuse you.. because on one hand shes telling u shes not looking for anything serious, but you feel she treats you like a potential boyfriend/partner
4) she seems to get upset at you over little things, or is inconsistent in her behavior with you
5) it feels as if shes putting in the bare minimum effort with you.. not dressing up too nicely, wearing average everyday clothes around you or loungewear like pajamas and hoodies,
6) Her compliments and things she says to you seem disingenuous or overexaggerated. "oh my gosh u look so cute today! " "u always look soo handsome" "ur just a cutie arent u"

I see alot of posts on here that scream that a dude is being used.. Thus why they are usually so confused at everything and coming to a online forum for help.. I would say maybe 50-60% of all posts here from guys looking for help on a situation fall into this category.

The sad reality is this: If you're not used to pulling and piping.. a random girl falling into your lap who is genuinely there for you, is HIGHLY unlikely..

---- A short bit on why some guys just aren't pulling girls----
I personally believe its just due to not socializing enough and not having enough experience. Would you believe it if I told you 30% of guys don't even know how to smile at a woman to show them interest? Many guys cannot smile on cue. and many are simply unsure about their smile. Theres a percentage of guys that dont even have more than 1 or 2 friends.. Basically little to no social life.

If you take a look at the guys who are pulling tons of girls, piping a few on the regular , or those who land good relationships, They always have consistent emotional and social validation from friends or family.. Whether this be a group of friends they have had for years, co workers , family members, parents, siblings, -- This energy of social validation and love from peers/your social circle.. is the crucial energy in which we are able to connect with new people, and with the opposite sex. The opposite sex is no different than anyone else . the only thing is, alot of men LACK interaction with the opposite sex.. Why? because they believe silly sh.t like "you shouldnt have girls as friends".. or "i dont want a girlfriend i jus want to be a player!". then, guess what happens? They grow up a life without deep social interaction with women, and wonder why they can't seem to understand women.

Rebound girls can be fun. The last one I was with picked me up at the airport, drove me to her place and then we banged 3 times that night and then every day for 3 months. Then I went back to the airport and flew home.

 

[Divorced w 3]

Virtually every date you go on a woman is going to mention something about their ex. It's meaningless.

You almost have to. People want that social understanding, they’re wired to find out if they’re with a normal person or if they’re out with the next Dahmer (or maybe someone in between)

 

[Mike32ct]

I think friendzone still exists. But, to your point, it’s probably much less common today because women are even increasingly picky about guys they befriend or even talk to socially.

There is a minimum looks requirement even just to be friendzoned. Probably need to be at least 5.4 to be FZ-ed and 6.5 to be dateable. (Rough numbers I pulled out of my…)

For example, can you really show me where anyone is complaining that they are being friendzoned (which should be an outdated 00s term thrown into the dustbin of history), or complaining they don't want a girlfriend. It doesn't exist because its simply not true.

 

[SW15]

I think friendzone still exists. But, to your point, it’s probably much less common today because women are even increasingly picky about guys they befriend or even talk to socially.

In my approaches, I heard the "I Have a Boyfriend" excuse much more in the 2000s than I ever heard in the 2010s and beyond.

The women that I've approached within the last 5-10 years have been getting more sophisticated in their excuse making when not interested. Perhaps I haven't been getting the IHAB because women can sense my game is sophisticated and I will push back on the IHAB. I actually thought the IHAB was dead.

The infield video taken below in April-May 2021 shows that the IHAB is still alive.

I don't know if male-female friendship is dying. It's a bad idea. I've spent the last 20+ years avoiding friendships with females when I felt attraction. Additionally, I had a bad experience with a female friend in a case where I wasn't attracted to her.

Lesbian female-straight male friendships aren't very common either.

 

[corrector]

I think friendzone still exists. But, to your point, it’s probably much less common today because women are even increasingly picky about guys they befriend or even talk to socially.

There is a minimum looks requirement even just to be friendzoned. Probably need to be at least 5.4 to be FZ-ed and 6.5 to be dateable. (Rough numbers I pulled out of my…)

Exactly. That is why threads like this written by chad/chadlites giving advice on not seeing women as friends rings hollow. Especially for something that is an extremely rare occurance in this day and age.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

no shvt an inexperienced man is going to need help dealing with his first few gfs or every partner forward. The issue comes when he asks for advice online and the first answers he gets are:

- She’s obviously cheating on you dude because she didn’t respond to his text at midnight

- If your girlfriend comes to you for help against another guy stalking her, accuse her of cheating right away

- Ghost your girl for a week or two for something petty.

Now, there’s other stuff to mention that the guy couldn’t really combat

- She wasn’t fully single/available at the time

- She is crazy or mentally unfit

- She is just a POS lol

 

[RazorRambo24]

Rebound girls can be fun. The last one I was with picked me up at the airport, drove me to her place and then we banged 3 times that night and then every day for 3 months. Then I went back to the airport and flew home.

The crazier/hotter the better in my opinion. and 3 months seems to be the sweet spot for dealin with these girls.. 2-3 months usually.

Just realized the title is mad wonky.. should be more like "Why did that girl ditch me after all the fun we had? The Tale of The Rebound"
Rebound is just such a general term though.. it encompasses alot of diff types of situations but most are similar id say