Did You Ever Dictate The Terms/Rules Of The Relationship?

[soulforge]

I have witnessed it firsthand; a girl will drop her thot friends and single habits for you instantly. NOW, if you slightly lose frame/she starts to lose interest in you then she will naturally start resorting back to her old ways little by little. Even if I have witnessed this firsthand, I still don't bother to go for these girls because it's a ticking time bomb IMHO. Every guy is going to lose frame at some point in life because it's wife. You have a bad pitfall in life and the last thing you need to worry about is your partner ditching you.



What are some reasonable points to make to on a LDR? A girl with a lot of male friends is big red flag in general, so I wouldn't even consider dating her in the first place lol. If she's initially showing more red flags than a Chinese parade, then I'm not going to date her, I'm going to LTR the girl with the most green flags. Going back to my first point, a girl that I might meet might have some red flags from just being a single girl which makes sense, but she will hopefully naturally drop those as the relationship progresses. Now, if it's 3 months in and she's still flirting with her ex, going to clubs, showing mixed signals,and just planned a weekend trip to Miami without you then yeah don't date her lol.

Your right. I mean if a girl is transitioning from single life to LTR life she might take a little time to drop everything. Also remember... Most girls we meet from the offset, we treat them like plates, so some won't feel the need/insentive to drop her bad habits.

However if it's pretty much developed into a LTR situation, then yeh naturally she should be dropping the club life, parties, girl trips...

However social media? Man that's a difficult one for most woman to drop.

 

[Modern Man Advice]

Yes, you need to verbally set the frame and conditions before committing. I would say that setting those standards begin right at the dating phase. Vetting women is essential in setting the frame, and letting her know both through actions/behavior and verbally that this is what you value, want, desire, will commit to and not.

This is not only to set the "tone" and frame in the relationship but for your own sake and self-respect. It speaks to your worth and how valuable you view yourself. Questions, like "What do you bring to the table in a relationship?", "How and what would you contribute in my life?", etc, etc.

The only caveat is that you better have your life together and be able to respond to those questions yourself. If you, yourself, have nothing to contribute and hold value to, then you have no right in asking for the same.

 

[soulforge]

Yes, you need to verbally set the frame and conditions before committing. I would say that setting those standards begin right at the dating phase. Vetting women is essential in setting the frame, and letting her know both through actions/behavior and verbally that this is what you value, want, desire, will commit to and not.

This is not only to set the "tone" and frame in the relationship but for your own sake and self-respect. It speaks to your worth and how valuable you view yourself. Questions, like "What do you bring to the table in a relationship?", "How and what would you contribute in my life?", etc, etc.

The only caveat is that you better have your life together and be able to respond to those questions yourself. If you, yourself, have nothing to contribute and hold value to, then you have no right in asking for the same.

I tend to agree with you on this.. I have also considered others opinions on this.. obviously if there girl is a raging 304 then laying boundaries down is a futile exercise.

If the girl has maybe been single for a while and has lived the single life, then I think most of us guys will likely have to lay down boundaries From the offset...

If she isn't willing to acknowledge those boundaries, then it's easy, you let her go or keep her around for sex only.

However if she expects your boundaries, then you BETTER absolutely make sure that if she breaks that boundary you will absolutely walk away.

It's preferable that you LTR a girl who you don't have to set many boundaries for... But honestly from a realistic point of few.. The chances of you meeting a attractive sexy western woman, who comes as the perfect package is very unlikely.

Most attractive single chicks WILL go out to bars/clubs, I think giving her that one opportunity to adjust from single life to LTR life is worth it, but you better be ready to drop her the moment she trips up.

 

[CyrusTheGreat]

So girl I have been seeing for the last 4 months.

Every Friday night I have noticed she goes a little quiet when it comes to texting.

Normally she always replies back to my text within 10 minutes.

Tonight it's been taking her an hour to reply back to me.

She sent me a text message claiming that she is at her sisters house watching films.

This girl is obsessed with her phone and constantly checking it.

If she is with her sister watching films, then why the fuk would it take her over two hours to reply back to me? It doesn't make sense.

I have caught her in a lie previously on a Friday night.

My belief is, she is either out getting drunk in a bar or club.. or she is with another dude.

If she was watching a film with her sister, her phone would be by her side, and would take her only two minutes to reply back to me.

That fact that she has gone completely offline tells me.. something is up... She probably fukin someone.

This hoe is getting ghosted tomorrow

@soulforge I hope you aren't talking about the girl in this thread. Cause if you are, you're just wasting your time.

 

[2Rocky]

It's easier to cull than to train....