What open with when you send your first text

Harrison0409

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I’m asking for some help with what to write in an opening text.Or is there some literature or book recommendations?
 
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BillyPilgrim

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Wait until Thurday-Monday. Ask her about her weekend. This is simple and will screen for high interest.

No one's going to give away their best material lol.
 

2Rocky

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Context needed...how did you get the number? if it is in person (the Best Way)

If you had an emotional high moment together refer back to that. An inside joke, a shared laugh, a comment she made to you...

Assume she is going to remember you .

Many times I like to get a picture together or of her when we meet to text to her. It's a plausible reason to text her. It appeals to her vanity and that affirmation is associated with you.

"This was fun. Let's get together this week and do something. Rocky"
 

logicallefty

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First text is important. Standing out from the 99 others she has in her inbox that say “Whats up?” or “Hows your day” can make it or break it. A few I use:

“Hey whats shakin?”

“Whats the good word bird?”

“You workin hard or hardly workin?”
 

BillyPilgrim

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I would say Tinder is an exception. You have to get creative for tinder and can't just use your initial reaction of her profile since many guys do that and she's heard it all before.

If you're on Tinder, do a google search for Tinder openers and come up with your own angle from a good one that you like. That's how I got my main opener.
 

Harrison0409

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Wait until Thurday-Monday. Ask her about her weekend. This is simple and will screen for high interest.

No one's going to give away their best material lol.
Context needed...how did you get the number? if it is in person (the Best Way)

If you had an emotional high moment together refer back to that. An inside joke, a shared laugh, a comment she made to you...

Assume she is going to remember you .

Many times I like to get a picture together or of her when we meet to text to her. It's a plausible reason to text her. It appeals to her vanity and that affirmation is associated with you.

"This was fun. Let's get together this week and do something. Rocky"
This message is going to go out in messenger. I’m open to all forms of messaging.
 

2Rocky

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This message is going to go out in messenger. I’m open to all forms of messaging.
quit over thinking it... What do you want? Your goal it to get skin to skin contact with the least amount of back and forth communication without being in each other's presence.

If it is some woman whose profile attracted you, then...
"Danielle, I noticed from a mutual friend we were both going to the opening night of the Nutcracker I'd love to meet you in person there. "

Tina, i saw you sent me a friend request . I see we both live in XXXXX I have a strict policy of not adding friends I have not met in person. How is your week looking?
 
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member160292

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The more you overthink it, the more you will say something stupid. Keep it simple, like how’s your workweek, anything fun over the weekend?

If she doesn’t respond, you know where her interest level is.

it’s your job to keep the conversation going, it’s her job to play along
 

LucianoM

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hey what's up, you want to meet up tomorrow?

Or usually a simple variation of that. If the girls is down thats all you need. Skip all the "funny"/"playful" bullchit texts PUAs tell you to send.
 

LucianoM

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"Hey this is xxxx from wherever. How's your day been so far?"

Basic stuff...no need for some exotic text.
I know its just my style, but i never send these types of texts. Whats the point of them? Asking mundane questions to force a convo feels cumbersome, all you gonna get is the token reply "good, thanks for asking how about you?"

Then you send another bullchit response. The only times i text a girl is if im inviting them out somewhere, thats it. If i dont plan on inviting her out again for 3 weeks, then i wont send a text for 3 weeks.
 

Modern Man Advice

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Send her a funny hello .gif. I like the weird-looking Indian midget (I know it's the politically incorrect term but deal with it) hello-rolling his fingers. Or the black dude in underwear cruising by in roller skates saying hey girl.

But yeah, as everyone mentioned, don't overthink your texts. That is true throughout the whole chat and especially that first text. The more you overthink it the more likely you will end up saying something stupid.

I learned this a while back when I was learning "text game", and that is: If you have nothing to say or can't think of anything to say in the first 5 seconds, do not say anything at all.


Modern Man Advice
 

jaymbrs

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This is a classic low confidence and insecure text. Dont be like this guy. Just get to the point.
Weird. It usually ends up getting me a date that weekend. But I guess I'm doing it wrong.
 

Hamurabimbi

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I’m assuming this is OLD. When I was on Tinder. I would read her bio. look at pics. view her IG & listen to her Spotify. then pick out something interesting from those and bring it up in a text message. can try light sarcasm. Humor. gentle tease or being earnest. Oddly, I found younger women (<25) didn’t get the tease/humor/sarcasm stuff. so I learned to avoid those openings with them.
 

BillyPilgrim

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I’m assuming this is OLD. When I was on Tinder. I would read her bio. look at pics. view her IG & listen to her Spotify. then pick out something interesting from those and bring it up in a text message. can try light sarcasm. Humor. gentle tease or being earnest. Oddly, I found younger women (<25) didn’t get the tease/humor/sarcasm stuff. so I learned to avoid those openings with them.
Don't you think this method is a lot of work? I wouldn't recommend this for any woman regardless of age.
 

Hamurabimbi

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Don't you think this method is a lot of work?
it is. But I was a very relaxed slow Tinder user. 2 nights s week I’d grab a glass of wine, and slowly Tinder for an hour or so. I enjoyed leisurely doing it. I also found some great music I wouldn’t have known about. I found it fun. But yes. It is work.
 

BackInTheGame78

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I know its just my style, but i never send these types of texts. Whats the point of them? Asking mundane questions to force a convo feels cumbersome, all you gonna get is the token reply "good, thanks for asking how about you?"

Then you send another bullchit response. The only times i text a girl is if im inviting them out somewhere, thats it. If i dont plan on inviting her out again for 3 weeks, then i wont send a text for 3 weeks.
Nah, you'd be surprised the type of responses you get from those most times...they will usually send you long texts about what they have going on etc and it gives you a lot of follow up stuff
 
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