I Nearly Died in a Car Crash Last Weekend. How Can I Prevent This From Ever Happening Again?

nicksaiz65

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This thread is a combination of a life update, rant/vent, and asking for advice.

I had a life threatening, potentially life ending event happen to me last weekend.

I had an extra gig that I picked up in Nashville to bring in a bit of extra cash. After that, I crashed at my friends’ house and snuck in about 4-5 hours of sleep. I wanted to be home in the morning, so I began driving back around 6 AM.

I noticed that I was feeling extremely tired on the drive back, so I pulled over to a truck stop, jumped in the back seat and set an alarm so that I could take a 30 minute nap. I was about 20 minutes away from home, so I figured I would drive the last 20 minutes home and then take a very quick nap in my own bed once I got back.

After that, I ended up falling asleep behind the wheel. All I remember is seeing the rail of the highway flying towards me, and it was too late for me to do anything about it.

I crashed my car into the rail on the side of the highway, and got thrown onto the side of the road, with the airbag coming out of the car.

I was able to get help, and have the car towed nearly instantly. I never thought that something like falling asleep behind the wheel would ever happen to me. It’s especially egregious because I usually drive back from Nashville around 3 AM(once I’m done gaming) and I get back just fine every single time. I don’t even usually take the nap like I did this time.

The only difference I can think of is, when I drive back from Nashville, I always either drink a Red Bull or a Bang on the way back. This time, I didn’t have the energy drink because “I didn’t feel like I needed the caffeine.” (And I already had a Bang earlier to get me through the work day.) Huge mistake. But you know, people say the Bang/Red Bull is going to kill me too.

The person towing me told me that people had died in wrecks that were less severe than the one that I was in and that I was extremely lucky to be alive. My parents described it as me “getting a second chance.” Also, what if I had wrecked at 2 AM and there was no one there to help me? They say I seriously need to change my habits.

It especially pisses me off because I just spent $1.5K on car repairs. All of that money is seriously just down the drain, imagine spending all that then destroying the car.

As for why this happened, I can attribute it to two reasons. In my theory, at least. The first is a lack of sleep. This work week was absolutely insane, before I made this drive. I was cutting my sleep to get as ahead as humanly possible so that I don’t have to feel any work stress.

I really do know that I should get more sleep. But honestly, I feel like it’s truly impossible. Between work itself, getting ahead for work, gym, chores, game, music, and just the comical size of my To-Do list, I always have to end up cutting my sleep. I often do it to get ahead at work so that my work days are less stressful. I accept that I’ll have a huge list of to-dos in life. But it often means I have to cut my sleep to stay ahead, which leads to me being sleep deprived. I truly don’t know how to fix it, if it’s even possible to fix it while being successful at the things I wish to be successful at.

The second potential reason is my sleep apnea. I haven’t been officially diagnosed with sleep apnea, but I’m like 95% sure I have it. I’m wondering if that has any bearing on this wreck happening. From the small bit of research I’ve done, it can affect this. I’ll have to look into this more, and I should get a formal test for sleep apnea.

Additionally, I love going to different cities every weekend. Long drives are just a reality in my life.

I don’t want this post to get too long. But basically, I wanted to ask how to prevent this from ever happening again. I’ve totaled two cars now in my life. One of my goals is to never get in a wreck ever again.

The first car, I totaled by driving too fast and being an idiot basically lol. After that, I told myself I’d never get in another wreck again, and I drove very carefully after that. I didn’t get in another wreck for 4 years. But then this happens(from the lack of sleep, I’m assuming.)

Basically, I don’t have the answers on how to prevent a wreck like this ever again. I wanted to get some feedback and answers from you guys.

Other than fixing my sleep, maybe I make it a policy to have a Red Bull with each long drive? I’d love to hear what you all think.
 
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BackInTheGame78

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Man...I had a similar experience with a different ending luckily. At the time was still living an hour and a half from where myself and roommate worked as DJs, so we would drive up every Friday and sometimes if we didn't crash with some girls overnight, we'd drive back again Saturday also.

Usually did after hour parties so those typically went til 5 or 6am...one time we ended up driving back home after we got done there and I was driving and hadn't slept since I woke up the previous morning. Was about halfway back, I was driving on the highway and was so tired...must have closed my eyes and fallen asleep and suddenly I hear a voice say "wake up!"

I wake up kinda of startled and am starting to drift towards a stopped car and a state trooper to my left on the shoulder...if I hadn't woken up there is no doubt in my mind I would have plowed into them going 70mph. I look over and my roommate is passed out sleeping.

I often think about that still to this day, over 25 years later. I had a very close relationship with my grandmother and before she died she told me she would always be looking over me no matter what. I have no doubt the voice I heard telling me to wake up was hers. I have no other explanation. I asked my roommate if he said anything to me around that time and he looked at me confused and said he was passed out sleeping.

I wonder how different my life would be today if I went to jail for vehicular homicide and killing a state trooper because that was what was about to happen without that intervention occurring.

Bro, I know what you mean regarding sleep and wanting to get things done, but you can't get anything done if you are dead or God forbid on jail for killing someone. Gotta take care of your health first and foremost. Regarding sleep apnea, get a sleep study done. I have it as well and it's a very serious issue if left untreated. Will lead to cardiac issues as it is very hard on the heart as well as the rest of the body. One of the biggest stressors on the body is lack of proper sleep. Pretty much worse for you than anything else you could do. I was diagnosed with severe sleep apnea near 40 and use a CPAP machine now when I sleep. I freaking love it...won't sleep without it. Feel so much better from using it, not tired all the time during the day anymore.
 
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nicksaiz65

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Man...I had a similar experience with a different ending luckily. At the time was still living an hour and a half from where myself and roommate worked as DJs, so we would drive up every Friday and sometimes if we didn't crash with some girls overnight, we'd drive back again Saturday also.

Usually did after hour parties so those typically went til 5 or 6am...one time we ended up driving back home after we got done there and I was driving and hadn't slept since I woke up the previous morning. Was about halfway back, I was driving on the highway and was so tired...must have closed my eyes and fallen asleep and suddenly I hear a voice say "wake up!"

I wake up kinda of startled and am starting to drift towards a stopped car and a state trooper to my left on the shoulder...if I hadn't woken up there is no doubt in my mind I would have plowed into them going 70mph. I look over and my roommate is passed out sleeping.

I often think about that still to this day, over 25 years later. I had a very close relationship with my grandmother and before she died she told me she would always be looking over me no matter what. I have no doubt the voice I heard telling me to wake up was hers. I have no other explanation. I asked my roommate if he said anything to me around that time and he looked at me confused and said he was passed out sleeping.

I wonder how different my life would be today if I went to jail for vehicular homicide and killing a state trooper because that was what was about to happen without that intervention occurring.

Bro, I know what you mean regarding sleep and wanting to get things done, but you can't get anything done if you are dead or God forbid on jail for killing someone. Gotta take care of your health first and foremost. Regarding sleep apnea, get a sleep study done. I have it as well and it's a very serious issue if left untreated. Will lead to cardiac issues as it is very hard on the heart as well as the rest of the body. One of the biggest stressors on the body is lack of proper sleep. Pretty much worse for you than anything else you could do. I was diagnosed with severe sleep apnea near 40 and use a CPAP machine now when I sleep. I freaking love it...won't sleep without it. Feel so much better from using it, not tired all the time during the day anymore.
Man, your routine sounds exactly like mine. I have the exact same routine except I’m going to Nashville most weekends since I left my band. Even the distance that we drive is about the same. An hour to an hour and a half.

That’s an ethereal experience that you describe. You were truly covered in that situation…

I plan to get treated for the sleep apena. I used to think that just by losing weight and continuing my fitness regimen, it would resolve itself. But maybe not. It’s on my list, and I’ll bump this thread once it’s done. I was so against the idea of a CPAP machine but if it’s what I need, I’ll get it.

Dude, I have the exact same symptoms that you were discussing. I’m just deathly tired during the day. I usually need 1-2 energy drinks to even make it through the work day, tbh. It also seems that no matter how much I sleep, I’m just deathly tired. We’ll have to see what the results of my sleep study are.

I thought it was just me with the sleep apena. I’m glad to hear I’m not alone on that.
 
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lost_blackbird

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I had a potentially fatal crash about 10 years ago, but it wasn't because I was tired it was
because I was an idiot. I had not long bought a powerful Audi S3, 11 days prior to be precise
wasn't used to the car, wasn't used to four wheel drive, wasn't talented enough to scrub
off enough speed to make it around the roundabout that appeared at the end of a bend
in a road I wasn't familiar with at all. Hit the kerb of the roundabout with my off side front
wheel at about 80mph, I was doing about 130 when I saw the obstacle and started braking.
Car spent a time of two wheels but through some miracle didn't flip over. £7000 worth of
repairs to the car to make it drivable again, but it was never completely fixed after that.

The only place I've ever nearly fallen asleep at the wheel was in the US on my honeymoon.
Long, featureless straight roads, cruise control, warm weather and a full stomach from the huge
meals served there was a recipe for disaster. In the UK I've driven large lorries and buses
in Central London professionally and been a van courier working 14 hour days. All involving
extended amounts of time behind the wheel day in and day out so I guess I'm used to driving
when fatigued. My advice is simple enough if you're feeling groggy, get some loud energetic
music playing on the radio, open all the windows so you're getting blasted by turbulence and
wind noise, even better if it's cold outside and get an obscenely strong coffee as soon as you
see a place to stop and buy one. While you're stopped for coffee, walk around outside while
you drink it. Glad you walked away from that one, looked nasty but the car did it's job and
protected the occupant. Metal can be replaced.
 

Pierce Manhammer

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The issue here is obviously sleep and exhaustion as you’ve pointed out. Good sleep is like the single most important thing anyone can do for themselves.

Unfortunately our society has developed into one where you have to make sacrifices in your schedule to get ahead financially. It’s simply absurd the sheer amount of work one needs to do in order to work for a corporation and climb the ladder or even make one’s own business successful.

As you’ve said, get yourself to a sleep center doc and do a sleep study it’s easy, they get you a monitor to wear during sleep. Now, depending on what that study shows you may need to wear a cpap at night, it’s a pain in the ass. Your apnea could also be positional and solved by simply sleeping at a 30 degree angle, but you’ll find out.

I believe if one has a neck circumference of more than 16” your chances of having apnea is greatly increased. Leaning out can sometimes resolve the issue completely.

The best of luck.
 

Dr.Suave

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I remember stying up late when I was out and about with my previous LTR. At 3am I was dropping her at her place and then it was a 30 min drive to my place.

I remember one night I was driving back to my place and I kind of fell asleep for a second. Didnt crash or anything, but I almost did. Now I try to call it a day earlier, especially if Im driving.
 

Mike32ct

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I’m so sorry this happened to you, but glad you’re ok.

The only thing that jumped out at me was the 30-min nap, despite how overly tired you were. I fear short naps can sometimes do more harm than good.

When I’m working crazy hours and must nap, I have this rule where put a one hour minimum on naps. Two hours is great, but I try to never go less than one.
 
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Plinco

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I've had two near death experiences, and after each one I re-focused my life. You shouldn't be angry about car repairs after that.
 

corrector

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Yeah, an accident in June 7, 2019 almost killed my folks. The car was flipped upside down and the roof of the car slid on the pavement before coming to a stop. Rare passanger side had a dent and I would have been killed/injured badly had I sat there. I stayed home that day. Air bags were deployed and my folks had their seatbelts on. The public and by-standers around came and helped rescue my parents, and the ambulence drove them to hospital. My mom gave me the news over the phone and I could not believe that happened and was in shock.

Had to buy a new car, get a new car loan, and the day of the accident I scrambled to rent a car so I could do a Real Estate showing while my folks was in the hospital. It was one of the longest showings as I wanted to rush back and check on my folks. Thank God they survived and are alive and well and we love the new car.
 
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zekko

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You never know when your number is going to come up. That's why I firmly believe in being grateful for every minute.

Agree with others get to a doctor about your sleep apnea, and try to make sleep a priority, it's part of your health.
 

nicksaiz65

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I had a potentially fatal crash about 10 years ago, but it wasn't because I was tired it was
because I was an idiot. I had not long bought a powerful Audi S3, 11 days prior to be precise
wasn't used to the car, wasn't used to four wheel drive, wasn't talented enough to scrub
off enough speed to make it around the roundabout that appeared at the end of a bend
in a road I wasn't familiar with at all. Hit the kerb of the roundabout with my off side front
wheel at about 80mph, I was doing about 130 when I saw the obstacle and started braking.
Car spent a time of two wheels but through some miracle didn't flip over. £7000 worth of
repairs to the car to make it drivable again, but it was never completely fixed after that.

The only place I've ever nearly fallen asleep at the wheel was in the US on my honeymoon.
Long, featureless straight roads, cruise control, warm weather and a full stomach from the huge
meals served there was a recipe for disaster. In the UK I've driven large lorries and buses
in Central London professionally and been a van courier working 14 hour days. All involving
extended amounts of time behind the wheel day in and day out so I guess I'm used to driving
when fatigued. My advice is simple enough if you're feeling groggy, get some loud energetic
music playing on the radio, open all the windows so you're getting blasted by turbulence and
wind noise, even better if it's cold outside and get an obscenely strong coffee as soon as you
see a place to stop and buy one. While you're stopped for coffee, walk around outside while
you drink it. Glad you walked away from that one, looked nasty but the car did it's job and
protected the occupant. Metal can be replaced.
130 miles per hour? Jeez. I’m glad you were ok man.

I was doing none of those at the time of the wreck, unfortunately. I’ll keep that in mind for the future.

“Metal can be replaced” is a great way to think about it.

By the way, 14 hour days are nuts. There’s always so much work to do it seems.
 

nicksaiz65

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The issue here is obviously sleep and exhaustion as you’ve pointed out. Good sleep is like the single most important thing anyone can do for themselves.

Unfortunately our society has developed into one where you have to make sacrifices in your schedule to get ahead financially. It’s simply absurd the sheer amount of work one needs to do in order to work for a corporation and climb the ladder or even make one’s own business successful.

As you’ve said, get yourself to a sleep center doc and do a sleep study it’s easy, they get you a monitor to wear during sleep. Now, depending on what that study shows you may need to wear a cpap at night, it’s a pain in the ass. Your apnea could also be positional and solved by simply sleeping at a 30 degree angle, but you’ll find out.

I believe if one has a neck circumference of more than 16” your chances of having apnea is greatly increased. Leaning out can sometimes resolve the issue completely.

The best of luck.
Yeah man, you’re absolutely right. Tbh I feel completely overwhelmed with the amount of work that has to be done. But that’s the topic of another thread.

I will definitely get to a sleep doctor. In fact, I’ll ping this thread with the results of the sleep study once it’s done.

As for leaning out, I’ve experimented with lots of different fitness approaches. What works for me is tracking my calories, intermittent fasting, and being as active as humanly possible to raise my TDEE. OMAD most days, and a full day of extended fasting if I have a huge cheat on the weekend or something like that.

Following that routine seriously leans me down. I hope that just by losing weight, I can defeat the sleep apnea once and for all.

I will keep you all posted on the sleep study results man!
 

nicksaiz65

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Sorry about your crash. Glad you are still here.

OP, you are doing too much. Slow down. Get more sleep and rebalance your life. Too much work, not enough rest. No bueno.
Thanks man. I appreciate it.

I’ve been taking a chill pill since the accident for sure. Cutting it down to the absolute essentials. Just work, gym, and some relaxation time for myself + sleep.
 

nicksaiz65

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First off, glad you're okay! Scary.

Secondly, are you familiar with Narcolepsy?

Narcolepsy is a chronic sleep disorder characterized by overwhelming daytime drowsiness and sudden attacks of sleep. People with narcolepsy often find it difficult to stay awake for long periods of time, regardless of the circumstances. Narcolepsy can cause serious disruptions.

Google it, talk to doctor cause it sounds like you just suddenly blacked out with no warning which suggests more than just being tired.

Something to consider.
Honestly, that’s kind of what it felt like. A blackout would be a good way to describe it.

I’ll have to see what the sleep study says and report back.
 

nicksaiz65

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I’m so sorry this happened to you, but glad you’re ok.

The only thing that jumped out at me was the 30-min nap, despite how overly tired you were. I fear short naps can sometimes do more harm than good.

When I’m working crazy hours and must nap, I have this rule where put a one hour minimum on naps. Two hours is great, but I try to never go less than one.
That is a good point. I wonder if the nap made me more tired than anything. I usually do micro-naps to keep going, but I’ll experiment with the “longer” ones too.
 

nicksaiz65

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It sounds like you were not wearing a seat belt? If you weren't, that makes you extra lucky. Getting thrown from a vehicle usually ends poorly.
Sorry, I wasn’t quite clear in my wording. The car got thrown to the side of the road, not myself. I always wear a seatbelt. I probably would’ve been ejected from the car were I not wearing one.
 

nicksaiz65

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Yeah, an accident in June 7, 2019 almost killed my folks. The car was flipped upside down and the roof of the car slid on the pavement before coming to a stop. Rare passanger side had a dent and I would have been killed/injured badly had I sat there. I stayed home that day. Air bags were deployed and my folks had their seatbelts on. The public and by-standers around came and helped rescue my parents, and the ambulence drove them to hospital. My mom gave me the news over the phone and I could not believe that happened and was in shock.

Had to buy a new car, get a new car loan, and the day of the accident I scrambled to rent a car so I could do a Real Estate showing while my folks was in the hospital. It was one of the longest showings as I wanted to rush back and check on my folks. Thank God they survived and are alive and well and we love the new car.
I’m glad both you and your family are all right. “Always wear a seatbelt” is kind of cliche but it really does save lives.
 
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