Women start argument

[john1234]

How do you handle arguments that happen for no obvious reason?

 

[Gamisch]

How do you handle arguments that happen for no obvious reason?

C'mon bro, 1 sentence. We need more information to make a correct assessment of the situation .

Most will say it's a sh1ttest. But women can have a 1000 reasons to act like this. Worst case it means there is sht going on that has nothing to do with the actual argument. But let's not jump to conclusions yet n..

 

[Scars]

If it's a sh*t test, act aloof, say something funny and sarcastic, don't take her seriously.. if she is actually starting a REAL argument and being rude then walk away.

 

[Macadellic]

If you get into an argument with any woman
then you’re in her frame and giving her attention.

Ignore her, do not respond and walk.

Who the f/ck wants anything to do
with argumentative combative c/nts

 

[logicallefty]

If it's a sh*t test, act aloof, say something funny and sarcastic, don't take her seriously.. if she is actually starting a REAL argument and being rude then walk away.

This^

Also good are “I’m sorry you feel that way” or “We will just have to agree to disagree on that”.

 

[Giovanni SouthSide]

This^

Also good are “I’m sorry you feel that way” or “We will just have to agree to disagree on that”.

I took a mental note of the
" We will just have to agree to disagree on that"

I would never say im sorry to a disrespectful b!tch

 

[RangerMIke]

If you get into an argument with any woman
then you’re in her frame and giving her attention.

Ignore her, do not respond and walk.

Who the f/ck wants anything to do
with argumentative combative c/nts

You can't win an argument with a woman because she typically will not argue rationally. You can not argue about how she 'feels'. It's better to just ignore efforts on her part to get you into arguments, if she presses you state your disagreement and just say that is how you 'feel' then change the subject. If you start trying to explain yourself you will only be accused of 'mansplaining'. It's just a waste of time better spent grabbing her @ss, which she will like better than arguing with her.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

How do you handle arguments that happen for no obvious reason?

If she’s a plate/GF then I would dump.

 

[logicallefty]

This^

Also good are “I’m sorry you feel that way” or “We will just have to agree to disagree on that”.

The "I'm sorry" isn't apologizing for anything you did, or admitting your wrong or anything like that. It's just saying you feel bad that they have having problems with whatever they are wanting to argue about. It's kind of like when you call customer service and the smartazz customer service rep say "Oh I'm sorry you are having trouble with that today", but then tells you "nothing I can do for you today". Same kind of interaction.

The "agree to disagree" is for sure the best one if it fits the context. It allows you end the argument while not admiting any wrongdoing, while also NOT getting mad and then being accused of having 'anger issues'. I use it a lot at work with toxic coworkers more than anything else. There is absolutely nothing anyone can do to kick your feet out from under you when you use it in an argument against their BS. It's rock solid. If they continue their BS and wanting to argue after you say it, then they are the looser who looks like a fool, not you.

 

[DTim88]

Lol this girl just threw me a sh*t test..so after talking to her for a month I finally decided to smash her for the first time Sunday..since then she's been in her feelings.. nothing major but first I didn't talk to her on Monday because I was busy she sent the "???" Text because I didn't respond to her initial text, she texted me yesterday I didn't respond, and she texted me now saying "u up" I didn't respond but then she replied that wasn't for you lol..she's not my girl but clearly she's in her feelings right now

 

[logicallefty]

@logicallefty been reading your posts for awhile, and you sound quite evolved, it's good to see!

Thank you. I live in Illinois, one of the most toxic and corrupt places on earth when it comes to people. We are flooded with sociopaths, psychopaths, narcissist, manipulators, con artists, people in positions based on who they know and not what they know, etc. If you don't learn how to play the psychological game here you get grounded up like beef in a meat grinder and then dropped on the floor to rot.

 

[Barrister]

About 5% of arguments are over something that needs to be discussed. The other 95% of arguments typically are either arguments over nothing at all, or they are gaslighting attempts by the woman who is upset at you about something other than what you are ostensibly arguing about. For the 95% portion, you explain your position firmly ONCE and NEVER admit fault for something that you are not in the wrong on. If she cools down after the explanation, great; if she does not and continues to want to be argumentative then you just need to exit at that point. Apply S&D and withdraw your attention until she has her emotions under control.

Women will keep an argument going and going and going until you capitulate and agree you were in the wrong or concede on some point. Don't concede on anything. This will start a chain reaction where she will keep coming back to the argument and wanting you to keep conceding until she is finally firmly "in the right" despite you doing nothing wrong. Remain firm at all times.

 

[Barrister]

The "I'm sorry" isn't apologizing for anything you did, or admitting your wrong or anything like that. It's just saying you feel bad that they have having problems with whatever they are wanting to argue about. It's kind of like when you call customer service and the smartazz customer service rep say "Oh I'm sorry you are having trouble with that today", but then tells you "nothing I can do for you today". Same kind of interaction.

I agree this tactic can work -- but I think you have to be careful even saying the word "sorry." My ex-wife loved trying to twist the fact that "sorry" had come out of my mouth even in this respect in later arguments. "Well you weren't being fair to me last time and remember you even apologized for it!" No - I said I am sorry you feel that way, not that I was wrong. But you get the point. Most women gaslight, and my opinion is don't even say "sorry" unless it is absolutely necessary.

 

[logicallefty]

I agree this tactic can work -- but I think you have to be careful even saying the word "sorry." My ex-wife loved trying to twist the fact that "sorry" had come out of my mouth even in this respect in later arguments. "Well you weren't being fair to me last time and remember you even apologized for it!" No - I said I am sorry you feel that way, not that I was wrong. But you get the point. Most women gaslight, and my opinion is don't even say "sorry" unless it is absolutely necessary.

Yes women sure do gaslight. You got that right brother! I think in the past few years though the good people are waking up to gaslighting, narcissist people, sociopaths, etc. etc. Not so easy to dupe the same people on the same stuff as it used to be. Women are natural at the psychological games because at the end of the day, that's all they have. "Fake it till they make it" is how women navigate through life on most things.

 

[Modern Man Advice]

How do you handle arguments that happen for no obvious reason?

You don't engage and allow her to simmer in her emotions.


Modern Man Advice

 

[oldmanofthesea]

I agree with everything Barrister has said. I will add that men forget that it is ok to disagree with a woman about something, and LEAVE IT AT THAT. This was hard for me to learn. Partly because of training from our mothers, and partly because women REALLY can't leave a disagreement alone - they MUST have resolution, and in 99% of cases, the only acceptable resolution for them is their "winning". If they don't have resolution/agreement from you, they get very anxious and can't calm down very easily or quickly. But you have to remember - that's their problem, not yours. Saying you are wrong or agreeing with them about something you don't actually agree with just to "save the peace" is the worst possible thing you can do. It lowers her respect for you and it will be used against you in all future discussions. The argument frequency will increase as well.

I do feel it is very important to listen to your girl express what she is unhappy about, and you should do it openly, receptively, and with full attention. Acknowledge that her FEELINGS are valid - don't claim they aren't. But if you disagree with her, without arguing or being combative, you simple state YOUR feeling and position on the matter and explain that you understand she feels differently and you both have a difference of opinion on it and that's ok. 99.999% of the time she will immediately start over again in an attempt to circle repeatedly on the subject until she wins, and from her first attempt to circle, this is when you shut it down, politely. "Baby, I already know how you feel. You explained it to me and I listened to you and heard you, but I also explained how I feel and I feel differently about it. No amount of further discussion is going to change either of our minds, and we will have to simply accept that we disagree on this, and that's ok. Arguing is just going to make one or both of us madder and drive us further apart. I'm not going to do that, so the conversation is closed. If you can't handle that then I'll head out until you calm down." Of course, she will HATE this and claim your shutting the conversation down is absolutely tyrannical and worse than arguing but you will have to believe and trust in the red pill on this one. Yes, it will upset her, but if she is not a nut-job or narcissist and she likes you, she will get over it and the outcome will be preferable to endless arguing, or you caving to something you don't agree with. If she can't get over it, then she is crazy and high-drama and not relationship material so you next her.

My GF still complains from time to time to me about how I handle these things - "I feel like everything is your way or the highway and if you don't want to talk about something you just control the conversation and shut the conversation down!" Yet she is MADLY in love with me.... and her statements are false because:
1. It isn't my way or the highway. When I feel she is right about something, I have apologized.
2. I don't control the conversation - I listen to her and ask her questions to understand her. Then I say how I feel. The only "control" I employ is refusing to fight. Sorry not sorry. I know full well that shutting an argument down is 1000x better than arguing for hours and never getting a resolution anyway.

 

[DTim88]

Lol this girl just threw me a sh*t test..so after talking to her for a month I finally decided to smash her for the first time Sunday..since then she's been in her feelings.. nothing major but first I didn't talk to her on Monday because I was busy she sent the "???" Text because I didn't respond to her initial text, she texted me yesterday I didn't respond, and she texted me now saying "u up" I didn't respond but then she replied that wasn't for you lol..she's not my girl but clearly she's in her feelings right now

Shes been calling me all day but Ignored her..she's not my girl so technically I can't get mad but I'm thinking am I acting like a little bish right now lol..I have more self respect than that if you're going to pretend like your texting another guy to get a reaction from me your not going to get anything

 

[DTim88]

Shes been calling me all day but Ignored her..she's not my girl so technically I can't get mad but I'm thinking am I acting like a little bish right now lol..I have more self respect than that if you're going to pretend like your texting another guy to get a reaction from me your not going to get anything

She called my phone 10 between last night and this morning..she texted me saying "since you cut me off, **** you"..

I real big on respect and she's going to the extreme after I had sex with her on Sunday lol smh

 

[DTim88]

Why were you ignoring her in the first place? Arguments and b!tchiness are a given with women from time to time, how you handle them is what matters.

You just wanted to smash one time and be done? If that's what you wanted then good. If not then you just made a fool of yourself by ignoring her text and phonecalls.

I doubt you just wanted to smash one time, cause you took the time and energy to post in her about her.

Also you didn't give details about the argument, therefore you took the approach of one size fits all and ignore. There is a lot of bravado in this forum about, "don't do this, its not alpha", and we all know what bravado in men really is.

I wasnt ignoring her I was genuinely busy with work..but what kinda pissed me off..is her texting me "you up" then replying "my bad that wasn't for you" idk what her intentions were but if she wanted a reaction from me I didn't give it to her..call it ego etc..I don't mind smashing her again but I don't see myself persuing anything further than that unless I started to like her like that

 

[BackInTheGame78]

How do you handle arguments that happen for no obvious reason?

If you have been dating her a while and this just started happening, it's likely her beginning to try and force you to dump her.

If this is something that has been happening from the beginning then the problem is you. You have stayed with this woman instead of leaving. I have no time for that type of nonsense and would let her argue with someone else quickly if it kept happening.

This is a sign of toxicity. If she continues to do this, leave.