Getting rid of intellectualism

[anonymous12345]

Your typical smart man isn't very emotionally intelligent or people smart so they are the most vulnerable to the mind games and the bait & switch tactics toxic women play. Logic is ineffective against the bait & switch technique lol.

Bait & switch by women is documented here: https://www.textingprince.com/blog/warning-beware-of-her-bait-and-switch-game

Furthermore, smart men are more likely to want to help their partners, so they can end up being tricked into a parasitic relationship with a woman that uses them.

Why is this the case? I recognise it though. I agree with what @PowerQuest writes, many Scandinavian men do that. We simp and pamper the women, sometimes we don't officially have a choice. Solution is to just stop, I would say. Are these men more empathic or wimps, or why do smart/intellectual men do this?

 

[HaleyBaron]

Are these men more empathic or wimps, or why do smart/intellectual men do this?

You need to rewrite your question. Because dumb men do this too.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

Why is this the case? I recognise it though. I agree with what @PowerQuest writes, many Scandinavian do that. We simp and pamper the women, sometimes we don't officially have a choice. Solution is to just stop, I would say. Are these men more empathic or wimps, or why do smart/intellectual men do this?

High intellect is going to make them desire to be problem solvers and empathetic. They might not be as feel good as your typical cheerleader, but they are prone to want to help and care for their partners.

VS

A dark triad person like Jordan Belfort is going to care about themselves first and do anything to achieve that even if it’s temporary helping someone out. They don’t give af about solving problem unless benefits themselves. This makes them less prone to mind games because they do it themselves and have no empathy telling them partner to kick rocks lol.

Now there are different types of smart people but I’m mainly talking about the nerdy Big Bang Nikola Tesla smart people.

 

[anonymous12345]

Great thread.

It is tragic that smart, hard working men are as attractive as a painful dead fish — when they are intellectual. Undeserved.

The problem is that intellectual men when faced with stress (social situation/romance) solve it like they usually do when faced with stress in their (especially work) lives: to be intellectual. It is understandable, but the girl will be put off, perplexed.

Everyone wants to get past the intellectualism in the end, so one can connect and have s3x. No arguing about that.

One way to solve this is is to find a girl that is intellectual in the same way (as stated in this thread). Then one can together babble loose about all that bs, and both can trip on their defence mechanism (intellectualism) until they both calm down. I’ve had women like that, a doctor and academic.

Another way is to solve the problem on one’s own, such that one can deal with girls that aren’t intellectual. It’s essentially about changing a behaviour, and CBT is probably suited for that. Get a book, be intellectual, solve it… Don’t have a quick run down right now.

One way is to not activate the defence mechanism at all; to be confident to the degree one doesn’t have a need to impress, or become stressed.

The question is what triggers the intellectualism. For me, it happens with girls I can’t banter with, that doesn’t smile etc, so I revert to strategies that I think will work instead. For that I think the solution is to know when to fold and NEXT. Hard in confined social sphere. Girls one feel is out of one's league is another topic.

Another explanation could be that one (maybe quickly) looses a frame battle, picks up their intellectualism and nervousness. Sounds like the description that @Jake_Gyllenhaal69 do above of high intellect people (emphatic/help/care).

But stopping intellectualism is a task. Doing it several hours every day, and then suddenly press a switch or change mode.

 

[HaleyBaron]

Great thread.

It is tragic that smart, hard working men are as attractive as a painful dead fish — when they are intellectual. Undeserved.

The problem is that intellectual men when faced with stress (social situation/romance) solve it like they usually do when faced with stress in their (especially work) lives: to be intellectual. It is understandable, but the girl will be put off, perplexed.

Everyone wants to get past the intellectualism in the end, so one can connect and have s3x. No arguing about that.

One way to solve this is is to find a girl that is intellectual in the same way (as stated in this thread). Then one can together babble loose about all that bs, and both can trip on their defence mechanism (intellectualism) until they both calm down. I’ve had women like that, a doctor and academic.

Another way is to solve the problem on one’s own, such that one can deal with girls that aren’t intellectual. It’s essentially about changing a behaviour, and CBT is probably suited for that. Get a book, be intellectual, solve it… Don’t have a quick run down right now.

One way is to not activate the defence mechanism at all; to be confident to the degree one doesn’t have a need to impress, or become stressed.

The question is what triggers the intellectualism. For me, it happens with girls I can’t banter with, that doesn’t smile etc, so I revert to strategies that I think will work instead. For that I think the solution is to know when to fold and NEXT. Hard in confined social sphere. Girls one feel is out of one's league is another topic.

Another explanation could be that one (maybe quickly) looses a frame battle, picks up their intellectualism and nervousness. Sounds like the description that @Jake_Gyllenhaal69 do above of high intellect people (emphatic/help/care).

But stopping intellectualism is a task. Doing it several hours every day, and then suddenly press a switch or change mode.

Easily solved. Learn to act. I'm pretty damn sure one of two of the usual game books tell men to take improvisation classes. I play a character when I'm with a girl versus who I am with the people I care the most about. Essentially the moment I created a character that women liked, I use that character for everything outside my closest circle. It gets me jobs, relationships, and girls. The fact I don't go insane means this is only something a few people can master. It helps that I came from a hobby that helped mold that part, too.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I hate to break it to you OP. Women likely aren’t responding to you because you’re in your head too much, and I’d imagine it manifests poorly via your in-person communication.

Knowing how to communicate with women and turn them on is one of the highest forms of intelligence there is. It’s a combo of EQ and IQ intelligence

There are more men in this world who know how to build satellites, than men who know how to build attraction in a woman.

I even know high IQ women that have issues talking to "most people", they don't like it. How they word it is "i hate small talk", and they find those people usually don't end up liking them anyways, so they avoid it. There's a small minority of women who are truly "sapiosexual" - they like displays of intelligence of course on men they find desireable, but the displays of intelligence makes them like them even more.

Most of the world does something different.

 

[Murk]

Never been a problem for me, like Pan says it’s the EQ/IQ combo. It’s what makes someone highly intelligent but charming and relatable rather than a weirdo living inside their own head with depression.

I am top 1 percentile for intelligence, scholarship to private school etc with “very superior intelligence” classification. In my younger days I was called “posh” but my intelligence has only been a positive for women. You have to be toned down most of the time with some of them though. Have some intelligent friends you can chat with and blow off some intellectual steam because most people don’t care what’s going on in your head.

High intelligence also comes with depression and overthinking, you think instead of feel, so relationships are reactionary, you have a penchant for worrying, it’s a double edged sword that can also lead to substance abuse.

 

[Hal9000]

If you want to date morons act like a moron. If you want to date brainy chicks act smart. Acting smart to a girl that is an idiot is like pizzing in the wind.

 

[HaleyBaron]

If you want to date morons act like a moron. If you want to date brainy chicks act smart. Acting smart to a girl that is an idiot is like pizzing in the wind.

Brainy chicks dont exist. Or rather, they are as smart as a guy who is only book smart.

 

[bat soup]

In my interactions I suspect I have the problem of appearing too intellectual or displaying too much value. Here’s how my convo might be:

Me: “I study language X. You’re French/Swedish right, how do you deal with pronunciation/bla bla?”
Her: bla bla bla

Later on:

Me: “You took pictures at the concert last night, right? How did they turn out?”
Her: “it was ok”
Me: “I was once shooting for a club in (capital) city X, but my laptop got stolen. That job got botched, heh.”
Her: <short answer, leaves>

Shy, nerdy girl. It’s not necessarily low interest, it can be explained in other ways. We’re on different parts of the globe and cultures here, so what’s considered right is very contextual.

The girls I talk with are 20-23, I’m 37. I obviously got more experience than them, but I suspect I scare them away with too much DHV. I got intellectualism as a defence mechanism due to fear of intimacy I think. One do too much DHV if one is insecure.

The solution is to say stuff like “I like pizza. Do you like pizza?” Lulz. But I find it really hard in many ways. I don’t got the patience for taking it so slow/close.

This is also relevant: “Note [the problem] isn’t having too much value – it’s showing it.” Is spot on I think, taken from this article:

https://www.girlschase.com/content/secrets-getting-girls-staying-out-auto-rejection

What you have to do is drink about half a bottle of vodka. After that, somehow the conversation of club slvts becomes almost interesting.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

These are the two types of intelligent women that I have dated

1). The power hungry Hillary Clinton/AOC types- these girls want slaves at the end of the day. If you are okay with submitting and kissing this girls arse constantly, she will be yours.

2). Brainy nerdy women- These girls are either extreme home bodies and never leave their house, or stuck in some silly relationship with a bum/loser because they refuse to leave their shvtty hometown. They can also be extremely lazy too lol.

 

[Gamisch]

These are the two types of intelligent women that I have dated

1). The power hungry Hillary Clinton/AOC types- these girls want slaves at the end of the day. If you are okay with submitting and kissing this girls arse constantly, she will be yours.

2). Brainy nerdy women- These girls are either extreme home bodies and never leave their house, or stuck in some silly relationship with a bum/loser because they refuse to leave their shvtty hometown. They can also be extremely lazy too lol.

Yeah, gave this thread some thaught and I came to the conclusion there are different types of intelligence when it comes to male female interactions. Thread makes sense, I have some extremely smart friends but guess what, they have zero clue how to get a woman...

A meathead can still possess loads of" dating intelligence ". He hits the gym, approaches women, escalates, knows how to fvck.

A woman on the other hand might have learned how to tread a man, cook clean take care of a man ect. With these skills combined with good looks she can get practically any guy.

It's almost like the term" fight iq", which doesn't (neccesarily )correlate with academic IQ.

Basically it could be simply stupid to talk about intellectual topics with a woman if she ain't up to that. Like it's stupid talking to a 5 y.o about politics and expecting to have a leveled conversation.

 

[HaleyBaron]

Basically it could be simply stupid to talk about intellectual topics with a woman if she ain't up to that. Like it's stupid talking to a 5 y.o about politics and expecting to have a leveled conversation.

Side note: the culture is heavily pushing politics lower and lower down the age bracket. A sign of incoming communism.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Side note: the culture is heavily pushing politics lower and lower down the age bracket. A sign of incoming communism.

Does communism also want to "dumb" down the society? Also does communism like to remove individuality from a society?