Boys from single mother households and escaping the nest.

[HaleyBaron]

This is something I've yet to see discussed in the field yet. Boys becoming men who have went through this feminist raising mostly came from mother centric homes, whether single mother or not. And when they change, they will conflict hard with the other lady in their lives: their mothers. This can extend to family in general. When a boy becomes a man, a redpill man, he now has to contend with the ultimate test of his independence, and that is usually that of his mother. The family itself can also be a test, like the head of the family, even a grandparent, who wants you not to become the estranged child.

What I want to focus on in this topic is the reality of boys escaping the tendrils of their feminist raising. Because you will clash with your parent, especially the more controlling ones. And your mother is basically a woman who has all the qualities of a wife and none of the benefits. She is the ultimate drain on any man who is trying to elevate himself. We all have stories or have heard stories of men that have sacrificed time and money to appease their mothers and/or their families. Emotionally manipulated because she raised them the story always went. We can kick abusive or time wasting girls out of our lives, but we can't do it easily to our parent.

I'd like to hear people's thoughts on this tough subject. Personally I have almost went non contact with my mother. However she still is able to find me online cause my career profile requires my full name for recruiters, and she goes on a certain site where everyone who makes a profile there is public. I cannot avoid her, but I damn well ignore her phone calls and texts. I will not tell you why I have been cutting contact with her, but most of the reason is because she was draining my time and resources. Ever since I have cut contact, I have never been happier, and my life has advanced to full independence. Imagining her back in my life is a nightmare where I regress to that kid that was always being held back by appeasing mother, emotionally, financially, and socially. Yet I know there's many men and boys out there who are still stuck in that situation as if they are a second husband or is her child provider. And often, inside I keep asking myself am I the bad guy. Family bond is a tough thing to shake off.

 

[forcerecon01]

This is something I've yet to see discussed in the field yet. Boys becoming men who have went through this feminist raising mostly came from mother centric homes, whether single mother or not. And when they change, they will conflict hard with the other lady in their lives: their mothers. This can extend to family in general. When a boy becomes a man, a redpill man, he now has to contend with the ultimate test of his independence, and that is usually that of his mother. The family itself can also be a test, like the head of the family, even a grandparent, who wants you not to become the estranged child.

What I want to focus on in this topic is the reality of boys escaping the tendrils of their feminist raising. Because you will clash with your parent, especially the more controlling ones. And your mother is basically a woman who has all the qualities of a wife and none of the benefits. She is the ultimate drain on any man who is trying to elevate himself. We all have stories or have heard stories of men that have sacrificed time and money to appease their mothers and/or their families. Emotionally manipulated because she raised them the story always went. We can kick abusive or time wasting girls out of our lives, but we can't do it easily to our parent.

I'd like to hear people's thoughts on this tough subject. Personally I have almost went non contact with my mother. However she still is able to find me online cause my career profile requires my full name for recruiters, and she goes on a certain site where everyone who makes a profile there is public. I cannot avoid her, but I damn well ignore her phone calls and texts. I will not tell you why I have been cutting contact with her, but most of the reason is because she was draining my time and resources. Ever since I have cut contact, I have never been happier, and my life has advanced to full independence. Imagining her back in my life is a nightmare where I regress to that kid that was always being held back by appeasing mother, emotionally, financially, and socially. Yet I know there's many men and boys out there who are still stuck in that situation as if they are a second husband or is her child provider. And often, inside I keep asking myself am I the bad guy. Family bond is a tough thing to shake off.

mothers can be abusive too.

 

[mrskinnypantz]

This is something I've yet to see discussed in the field yet. Boys becoming men who have went through this feminist raising mostly came from mother centric homes, whether single mother or not. And when they change, they will conflict hard with the other lady in their lives: their mothers. This can extend to family in general. When a boy becomes a man, a redpill man, he now has to contend with the ultimate test of his independence, and that is usually that of his mother. The family itself can also be a test, like the head of the family, even a grandparent, who wants you not to become the estranged child.

What I want to focus on in this topic is the reality of boys escaping the tendrils of their feminist raising. Because you will clash with your parent, especially the more controlling ones. And your mother is basically a woman who has all the qualities of a wife and none of the benefits. She is the ultimate drain on any man who is trying to elevate himself. We all have stories or have heard stories of men that have sacrificed time and money to appease their mothers and/or their families. Emotionally manipulated because she raised them the story always went. We can kick abusive or time wasting girls out of our lives, but we can't do it easily to our parent.

I'd like to hear people's thoughts on this tough subject. Personally I have almost went non contact with my mother. However she still is able to find me online cause my career profile requires my full name for recruiters, and she goes on a certain site where everyone who makes a profile there is public. I cannot avoid her, but I damn well ignore her phone calls and texts. I will not tell you why I have been cutting contact with her, but most of the reason is because she was draining my time and resources. Ever since I have cut contact, I have never been happier, and my life has advanced to full independence. Imagining her back in my life is a nightmare where I regress to that kid that was always being held back by appeasing mother, emotionally, financially, and socially. Yet I know there's many men and boys out there who are still stuck in that situation as if they are a second husband or is her child provider. And often, inside I keep asking myself am I the bad guy. Family bond is a tough thing to shake off.

Very well spoken and you got your point across
Accurately .
I came from a single parent home , with no father in the home a young boy is smothered and not allowed to go into the world and struggle and make mistakes and get fvcked up in the process. This is detrimental, it stops the masculine development.
I'm already a late bloomer and once my eyes opened I never went back to sleep , the sooner you wake the better

 

[Black Widow Void]

Folks divorced when I was 2 1/2 years old. Family (and maintaining harmony) was always important to me.

Not only did manipulating skills seem natural for my mother, but she also had a career background of psychology. Growing up in this environment was not always easy, but her behavior and reading various psychology books in the house also taught me a lot. I moved out while young and attending college.

Toward the end, we basically only called on birthdays. Usually in less than a month afterward (through e-mail exchange) conflicts would arise and we'd not speak again until one of us had another birthday. Although I knew the pattern by now, I had looked forward to hearing from her in December (my birthday month). It didn't happen. She died thirteen days before my birthday.

In all honesty, when there's unresolved conflicts, the post-death healing process seemed to take a lot longer (I always thought that it would be easier) . Do I regret some things? Of course. But, do I regret detatching and unraveling the previous unhealthy tapestry? Not one bit.

 

[Gamisch]

Great and brave topic . You can already hear dear mama in the back of your mind and feel like a *******. I can relate, grew up without a father in a Caribbean household, and now battling numerous feminine traits by acquiring "fatherly knowledge"( thank God for the sosuave forum!!!)

But like you say OP, your mother is probably the most draining woman in your life. Ofcourse this won't be the case for all of us, but it's no different than the usual dating environment where a certain percentage of women are bad and some are good.

The "good ones" however, most of the time, also do more harm to their sons then good. I knew multiple guys in their 30,s ,still living at home or in close contact under the spell of mommy . Like a teenage boy, unable to make decisions without thinking what she would think about it.

One friend of mine is Muslim ,34, and he and his brother still living at home. His brother is heavily depressed, because he cannot find a woman. And guess what, he virtually not allowed to leave the house before he marries. I told my friend his parent cant understand, in today's world even religious women don't want a guy under these circumstances. His sister ofcourse is married and has 3 children...

Basically they want a woman like his mother to marry his brother and that is just as retarded as it sounds .

No ,you are not the bad guy imo. A woman, especially older, should fully understand what you need to be a man. She should be your homie, supporting and understanding. If that's impossible then you should let it be.

 

[HaleyBaron]

I really feel bad for the religious households. I was also from one, but never anything as zealot as muslim, jewish, or asian households where it's even worse. So your scenario Gamisch is very common to hear. There the mother and father seem to have a strong hold over what the children do. I hear enough of children being cast out the family for doing something against the parent orders. And then people wonder why said people become more angry at the world or vindictive. Especially for the men.

In all honesty, when there's unresolved conflicts, the post-death healing process seemed to take a lot longer (I always thought that it would be easier) . Do I regret some things? Of course. But, do I regret detatching and unraveling the previous unhealthy tapestry? Not one bit.

My one fear is that one day I will hear she is dead. Shows how deep the roots go of parenthood. I was also a late bloomer, so it doesnt help I was winged off late.