Introvert seeking dating advice

[sceneparade]

I was recently talking to one of the supervisors about my impending absence, when I noticed this young lady staring at me. I turned to look at her, but as soon as our eyes met, she looked away, pretending she wasn't looking at me.

A few days later,, I finished work but needed to speak to the supervisor to get him to check that I had correctly filled in the overtime forms. As I was following behind him trying to get his attention, I noticed this same young lady off to the right staring at me. At that point she was probably staring for a couple of second or so. So I looked at her and she looked me straight in the eyes and held eye contact for about three seconds, before I started chatting to the supervisor.

A few days later, I bumped into her in the stairwell. She was leaving through the doors and I was entering. As she opened the door and saw me, her eyes seemed to linger on me, with the look of "that's him": type look, but also a little nervous to see me.
She then came out and initiated a conversation. She asked whether I had been issued company uniform. I told her I had not, and she informed me new delivery of uniform had been made and to enquire about it. During this conversation, she was looking deeply into my eyes with 100% eye contact. She then complimented me by saying "well you look very smart" (handsome in USA, or well-dressed/put together). She was undistracted by anything around us. Her body and feet were pointing in my direction.

Finally, on another day, my duty card was missing and approached her counter to ask about it. She enthusiastically waved for me to come in through the security door to speak to her.
Her desk faces away from the door. As she buzzed me in and I walked in, she turned around in her chair and faced me in a relax way, with her body and feet facing me. She waited for me to approach her. As we talked, we were both looking into each others eyes. Again, her eye contact was soft, focused and prolonged.. The vibes between each other was one of ease and comfortability.

Not sure what to do next. Whether she would be welcome to an approach or not.

Sorry for re-post. I was trying to respond to a comment left on previous post and it got deleted by mistake.

 

[Konada]

Don't sh!t where you eat. Unless you don't value your job.

 

[spred]

Yes, she expects you to approach.
Strike up a conversation, get her number, and ask her out.

 

[SH03C]

This is the 2nd time you’ve posted this. What happened with the advice you got the first time?
Did you not act? That was more than a week ago………

 

[user252009]

Don't act on it (because work), unless she explicitly initiates first. My 2c

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

Don’t date anyone at work

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

Don't sh!t where you eat. Unless you don't value your job.

Even if he didn’t, she would influence him to stay even more in a dead end job

 

[sceneparade]

This is the 2nd time you’ve posted this. What happened with the advice you got the first time?
Did you not act? That was more than a week ago………

As said, it got deleted by mistake. I didn't get to properly read previous comment left before it deleted, so was unable to see their advice hence asking again

 

[sceneparade]

Don't sh!t where you eat. Unless you don't value your job.

I'm UK, Iit is common for people to marry or be in relationships with people they have met at work, doctors, nurses for example ar common

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

I'm UK, Iit is common for people to marry or be in relationships with people they have met at work, doctors, nurses for example ar common

We aren't saying it isn't common, we are telling you that it is a terrible idea. It's common to eat like shvt and be fat like the majority of westerners, doesn't mean you should do it lol.

 

[sceneparade]

Don't act on it (because work), unless she explicitly initiates first. My 2c

She stopped me at work to initiate a conversation with me. After saying "you look very smart" I laughed it off and walked off

 

[sceneparade]

So I saw her today, was busy doing work on her computer. She didn't pay attention to me other than odd glance. I think I have blown it by not approaching at the beginning and kind of ignoring her (not acknowledging her presence) due to anxiety.

My nervousness has got better from the advice i have received from here. What's the best way forward? Ignore her or what?

 

[SH03C]

So I saw her today, was busy doing work on her computer. She didn't pay attention to me other than odd glance. I think I have blown it by not approaching at the beginning and kind of ignoring her (not acknowledging her presence) due to anxiety.

My nervousness has got better from the advice i have received from here. What's the best way forward? Ignore her or what?

Show no indifference. Remain polite and acknowledge her but don’t over pursue. If she walks by give a casual warm smile.

It’s important to strike while the iron is hot, if you missed this window, which it seems you may have, then you need to lay low for a few weeks and reengage in a casual tone.

This is my perspective. I would not pivot and begin to chase, though others here may strategize differently.

 

[sceneparade]

Show no indifference. Remain polite and acknowledge her but don’t over pursue. If she walks by give a casual warm smile.

It’s important to strike while the iron is hot, if you missed this window, which it seems you may have, then you need to lay low for a few weeks and reengage in a casual tone.

This is my perspective. I would not pivot and begin to chase, though others here may strategize differently.

For future learning, was my ignorance after the initial IOIs conveyed disinterest on my part, hence missed the boat, so to speak? Basically, she understood i am not into her,.

For the the last week, I pretty much came in, signed on and walk out, all whilst she was there behind her computer working, hence ignoring her.

 

[spred]

For future learning, was my ignorance after the initial IOIs conveyed disinterest on my part, hence missed the boat, so to speak? Basically, she understood i am not into her,.

For the the last week, I pretty much came in, signed on and walk out, all whilst she was there behind her computer working, hence ignoring her.

Since all interactions were at work, there is a lens applied over the situation.
- she may have had high interest and still has some but is waiting for a signal from you (because of work)
- she may had medium interest and gave up (because you didn't show, because some other guy came in the picture$
- she may have had low or no interest amd was looking only for validation.

Safest way is to engage her each time you meet and see if she is dropping additional hints or not .

 

[sceneparade]

Since all interactions were at work, there is a lens applied over the situation.
- she may have had high interest and still has some but is waiting for a signal from you (because of work)
- she may had medium interest and gave up (because you didn't show, because some other guy came in the picture$
- she may have had low or no interest amd was looking only for validation.

Safest way is to engage her each time you meet and see if she is dropping additional hints or not .

Something tells me it is the second one (and another guy enter the frame)

 

[sceneparade]

Since all interactions were at work, there is a lens applied over the situation.
- she may have had high interest and still has some but is waiting for a signal from you (because of work)
- she may had medium interest and gave up (because you didn't show, because some other guy came in the picture$
- she may have had low or no interest amd was looking only for validation.

Safest way is to engage her each time you meet and see if she is dropping additional hints or not .

You refer to additional hints. I was talking to her today regarding an work related accident, when she seemed to look at my shirt, but lower half, as in towards my abdomen and crotch area.

 

[spred]

You refer to additional hints. I was talking to her today regarding an work related accident, when she seemed to look at my shirt, but lower half, as in towards my abdomen and crotch area.

Ask her if she is single, or what she is doing outside work. Mention a concert/event you are going to and ask her if she wants to join you. Is she is available she will say yes.

 

[sceneparade]

Ask her if she is single, or what she is doing outside work. Mention a concert/event you are going to and ask her if she wants to join you. Is she is available she will say yes.

Does that mean her looking at my crotch is a positive? Hence "if she is available she will say yes".

 

[spred]

Does that mean her looking at my crotch is a positive? Hence "if she is available she will say yes".

It's hard to say. Psychologists say that if she looks down like she is sizing you up is a sign of interest and submission.
But I wasn't there to see her, so you can misinterpret. Surest way is to mention activities outside of work you can do together.