If a girl you are dating told you that she once dated a married man for over a year what would you do?

[zinc4]

I will tell you what i did. I dumped her on the spot. This was Sunday night after we had a great time in the historic district here and attended a large public church mass together. Felt bad about it because we had a great time at the church and rode a carriage around the center here. Had a good time.

But in the plaza park here, we sat down on a bench and i guess she felt comfortable enough to really open up...she told me her story and then wanted to go get some ice cream before heading to my place.

I was kind of in shock and told her i am not feeling any of this anymore so i will just get her an uber back to her home.

She started crying saying she couldn't believe i judged her and that she opened her heart up to me. And that she had confessed her sins after this and it was a huge regret in her life.

She had a million excuses saying how it was right after her ex fiancee left her...weak lonely point in her life...and the married guy keep aggressively pursuing her and she rejected all his initial advances but they worked together so he was always around her and always pursuing her.

I said i don't care. This is very subpar and not who i thought you are. You just proved yourself to be untrustworthy in general. I had been led to think otherwise and actually had a lot of respect for you prior to this.

She cried saying i had judged her and yeah maybe i did, but it just doesn't fit the model of who i thought she was and was an instant big demotion in my mind.

Just can't view her the same after hearing that. Just another girl to have sex with nothing else. She cried refused my uber and said she would rather take the bus then accept anything from me lol.

Will just go back to PNDing. Got a new girl wanting to meet for drinks who i met at the beach last week. Have to go to Panama on the 25th for business reasons then back to the US for Christmas.

 

[corrector]

The sexpat is just finding garbage. How is this news? Did you confess to her that you are sexing ALLOT other women there beside her and even been with local hors? If she is okay with that then that would still make her garbage whether she went with a married man or not, just a different tier of garbage.

 

[zinc4]

The sexpat is just finding garbage.

Im not a sexpat ffs. I have travelled my whole life and grew up studying maps. I am always gaming women no matter where i am and specifically came here to buy property for us tax reasons.

Arent you the same little ***** who cried about police brutality in the US against black guys but then have absolutely less experiences with the matter compared to me a white guy?

What is up with all the passive aggressive posters in here lately....You are telling me if you are off in an exotic country you arent going to be gaming the local women? Not my fault you are probably stuck in your boring little matrix 9 to 5 job world the rest of your life. Go **** yourself bro. Cant stand passive aggressive punks like you.

This is a thread about holding women you are seeing to standards.

 

[corrector]

Im not a sexpat ffs. I have travelled my whole life and grew up studying maps. I am always gaming women no matter where i am and specifically came here to buy property for us tax reasons.

Arent you the same little ***** who cried about police brutality in the is against black guys but then have absolutely less experiences with the matter compared to ne a white guy?

What is up with all the passive aggress posters in here. You are telling me if you are off in an exotic country you arent going to be gaming the local women? Not my fault your broke ass is probably stuck in your boring little matrix the rest of your life Go **** yourself bro. Cant stand passive aggressive punks like you. This is a thread about holding women you are seeing to standards.

Looks like I touched a nerve. If you are so thrilled why are you upset? Are you looking for validation? People who are full of the joy of the Lord do do not get upset like that. People who are full of sin react like this because they dont know Jesus. You need to repent.

 

[Velasco]

This the 5 date girl?

 

[EyeBRollin]

She would stay in the booty call compartment. I’d continue having sex with her.

 

[zinc4]

Looks like I touched a nerve. If you are so thrilled why are you upset? Are you looking for validation? People who are full of the joy of the Lord do do not get upset like that. People who are full of sin react like this because they dont know Jesus. You need to repent.

I started a thread about holding a girl you are seeing to high standards and you are purposely derailed it calling me a sexpat. If i was a sexpat i would be chasing pros here like most the other expats that come here and not messing with women who are well educated and have steady full time jobs. I promise you that it is no easier dating normal women in this city than any mid sized city in the US....much more difficult if you dont speak Spanish well.

I see you just edited your original reply to make it look like a post of substance when you first just called me a sexpat for no reason at all.

You are being passive aggressive and manipulative here.

The thread topic is simple. Holding women to standards.

 

[bat soup]

I will tell you what i did. I dumped her on the spot. This was Sunday night after we had a great time in the historic district here and attended a large public church mass together. Felt bad about it because we had a great time at the church and rode a carriage around the center here. Had a good time.

But in the plaza park here, we sat down on a bench and i guess she felt comfortable enough to really open up...she told me her story and then wanted to go get some ice cream before heading to my place.

I was kind of in shock and told her i am not feeling any of this anymore so i will just get her an uber back to her home.

She started crying saying she couldn't believe i judged her and that she opened her heart up to me. And that she had confessed her sins after this and it was a huge regret in her life.

She had a million excuses saying how it was right after her ex fiancee left her...weak lonely point in her life...and the married guy keep aggressively pursuing her and she rejected all his initial advances but they worked together so he was always around her and always pursuing her.

I said i don't care. This is very subpar and not who i thought you are. You just proved yourself to be untrustworthy in general. I had been led to think otherwise and actually had a lot of respect for you prior to this.

She cried saying i had judged her and yeah maybe i did, but it just doesn't fit the model of who i thought she was and was an instant big demotion in my mind.

Just can't view her the same after hearing that. Just another girl to have sex with nothing else. She cried refused my uber and said she would rather take the bus then accept anything from me lol.

Will just go back to PNDing. Got a new girl wanting to meet for drinks who i met at the beach last week. Have to go to Panama on the 25th for business reasons then back to the US for Christmas.

Waste of a good skank.

 

[zinc4]

She would stay in the booty call compartment. I’d continue having sex with her.

For sure. The sex is just so so though and there are other options. She sent me a bunch of whatsapp messages yesterday and i told her maybe we can hang out casually at my place in the future but no more dates.

Casually speaking i would much rather bang new women.

 

[zinc4]

Looks like I touched a nerve. If you are so thrilled why are you upset? Are you looking for validation? People who are full of the joy of the Lord do do not get upset like that. People who are full of sin react like this because they dont know Jesus. You need to repent.

I recently started going to church here because i feel better after i leave. Simple as that. Am trying to improve in that area in general. I never said i am full of the lord. I drink from time to time and have abused substances in general for a while now. My drinking is getting much better though. At least i am not trying to mindlessly slander strangers online for no reason at all then preach to them about "the lord."

 

[Dash Riprock]

I will tell you what i did. I dumped her on the spot. This was Sunday night after we had a great time in the historic district here and attended a large public church mass together. Felt bad about it because we had a great time at the church and rode a carriage around the center here. Had a good time.

But in the plaza park here, we sat down on a bench and i guess she felt comfortable enough to really open up...she told me her story and then wanted to go get some ice cream before heading to my place.

I was kind of in shock and told her i am not feeling any of this anymore so i will just get her an uber back to her home.

She started crying saying she couldn't believe i judged her and that she opened her heart up to me. And that she had confessed her sins after this and it was a huge regret in her life.

She had a million excuses saying how it was right after her ex fiancee left her...weak lonely point in her life...and the married guy keep aggressively pursuing her and she rejected all his initial advances but they worked together so he was always around her and always pursuing her.

I said i don't care. This is very subpar and not who i thought you are. You just proved yourself to be untrustworthy in general. I had been led to think otherwise and actually had a lot of respect for you prior to this.

She cried saying i had judged her and yeah maybe i did, but it just doesn't fit the model of who i thought she was and was an instant big demotion in my mind.

Just can't view her the same after hearing that. Just another girl to have sex with nothing else. She cried refused my uber and said she would rather take the bus then accept anything from me lol.

Will just go back to PNDing. Got a new girl wanting to meet for drinks who i met at the beach last week. Have to go to Panama on the 25th for business reasons then back to the US for Christmas.

I think you made a big mistake. Read on...

Maybe she didn't know he was married at first and maybe she thought they could be friends and it turned romantic, and on and on. Life happens, guy, and no one is perfect.

So she had a fling with a married guy years ago. BFD. If that's the most f*ucked up thing she ever does in her life, she'll be #2 to Mother Theresa. A junkie, criminal, mentally ill, abject disrespect, etc., etc., THOSE are dump-able offenses.

You strike me as having some qualities like a good friend of mine. Decent looking guy, owns property, has major $$ and a good job, BUT since I've known him (about 18 years), he has NEVER had a gf or gotten laid--to my knowledge and we hang out regularly. His problem? He finds fault with all women on a microscopic level. Now he's almost 60 and has all but shut down over women. He’s not gay either.

OP, let me ask you: Are you a 100% perfect person? Or maybe you have a superiority complex like a family member and my ex gf did.

I think you better start accepting people, warts and all, just like you have.

A famous person once said: "Those who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones." And we ALL live in glass houses, my friend.

I would message her back and tell her you over-reacted and leave it at that. Maybe she'll come around and maybe not. Who wants to date someone with such unrealistically high standards apt to knee-jerk reactions?

You posted, I commented.

Good luck to you.

 

[corrector]

I recently started going to church here because i feel better after i leave. Simple as that. Am trying to improve in that area in general. I never said i am full of the lord. I drink from time to time and have abused substances in general for a while now. My drinking is getting much better though. At least i am not trying to mindlessly slander strangers online for no reason at all then preach to them about "the lord."

Of course you will feel better after going to church.

 

[zinc4]

I think you made a big mistake. Read on...

Maybe she didn't know he was married at first and maybe she thought they could be friends and it turned romantic, and on and on. Life happens, guy, and no one is perfect.

So she had a fling with a married guy years ago. BFD. If that's the most f*ucked up thing she ever does in her life, she'll be #2 to Mother Theresa. A junkie, criminal, mentally ill, abject disrespect, etc., etc., THOSE are dump-able offenses.

You strike me as having some qualities like a good friend of mine. Decent looking guy, owns property, has major $$ and a good job, BUT since I've known him (about 18 years), he has NEVER had a gf or gotten laid--to my knowledge and we hang out regularly. His problem? He finds fault with all women on a microscopic level. Now he's almost 60 and has all but shut down over women. He’s not gay either.

OP, let me ask you: Are you a 100% perfect person? Or maybe you have a superiority complex like a family member and my ex gf did.

I think you better start accepting people, warts and all, just like you have.

A famous person once said: "Those who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones." And we ALL live in glass houses, my friend.

I would message her back and tell her you over-reacted and leave it at that. Maybe she'll come around and maybe not. Who wants to date someone with such unrealistically high standards apt to knee-jerk reactions?

You posted, I commented.

Good luck to you.

For sure i am not perfect myself and have done some bad stuff but i can't respect someone who would knowingly date a married man hoping he would leave his wife for her. That isn't just a mistake. It's methodical and deliberate. And a massive red flag.

I usually just casually date for the most part. But if i do start taking one serious, i have pretty high standards and am screen for red flags.

She did know and she knew he liked her from the beginning hence why she avoided his advances at first.

She messaged me yesterday and i told her we can hang out casually but nothing more. I was open to possibly continuing the relationship as i will have a place in neighboring country Panama soon but now am just not interested once i leave here.

 

[zinc4]

Of course you will feel better after going to church.

Church is relatively new to me. I was taken there as a kid some times but hadn't been in over 25 years prior to this. This is a huge cathedral as well. Built in the 1600s. The old santo domingo church. Its architecture is beautiful. At first i went there to just take pictures and sight see one day. I felt really good after leaving. I thought it was a placebo affect then went back attend there to an evening mass out of curiosity and have been returning.

 

[RickTheToad]

I will tell you what i did. I dumped her on the spot. This was Sunday night after we had a great time in the historic district here and attended a large public church mass together. Felt bad about it because we had a great time at the church and rode a carriage around the center here. Had a good time.

But in the plaza park here, we sat down on a bench and i guess she felt comfortable enough to really open up...she told me her story and then wanted to go get some ice cream before heading to my place.

I was kind of in shock and told her i am not feeling any of this anymore so i will just get her an uber back to her home.

She started crying saying she couldn't believe i judged her and that she opened her heart up to me. And that she had confessed her sins after this and it was a huge regret in her life.

She had a million excuses saying how it was right after her ex fiancee left her...weak lonely point in her life...and the married guy keep aggressively pursuing her and she rejected all his initial advances but they worked together so he was always around her and always pursuing her.

I said i don't care. This is very subpar and not who i thought you are. You just proved yourself to be untrustworthy in general. I had been led to think otherwise and actually had a lot of respect for you prior to this.

She cried saying i had judged her and yeah maybe i did, but it just doesn't fit the model of who i thought she was and was an instant big demotion in my mind.

Just can't view her the same after hearing that. Just another girl to have sex with nothing else. She cried refused my uber and said she would rather take the bus then accept anything from me lol.

Will just go back to PNDing. Got a new girl wanting to meet for drinks who i met at the beach last week. Have to go to Panama on the 25th for business reasons then back to the US for Christmas.

Cvnt has no morals and she cannot be trusted at all. Use as a plate, with protection, if you must.

 

[devilkingx2]

Personally I'd like a girl who has lived life and has interesting stories to tell and things to talk about. As long as she's not screwing me over and her excuse isn't "I was a bad person last week but don't worry I'm totally different now".

The red flag for me would be if she was the one who was married or if she was doing the pursuing intentionally trying to **** up some guy's marriage.

She had a million excuses saying how it was right after her ex fiancee left her...weak lonely point in her life...and the married guy keep aggressively pursuing her and she rejected all his initial advances but they worked together so he was always around her and always pursuing her.

I said i don't care. This is very subpar and not who i thought you are. You just proved yourself to be untrustworthy in general. I had been led to think otherwise and actually had a lot of respect for you prior to this.

This sounds like you put her on some huge Pedestal to me. Not really sure why you had some crazy high standard for her when she's just a regular person.

 

[Raasay]

You never know, mate. Here are 2 possible outcomes:
1) Parallel universe, you kept dating her, she is a good girl and you learn that she just made a mistake somewhen back in the days, but she is a good girl, good character and so on and it is all good.
2) Other universe, you think and do like in 1) and after 1 year she cheats on you, you tell yourself what a stupid f*ck you are, you should have known better.

I was with a girl, who fell in love with me while I had another GF back then, tried to seduce me etc. In the end I dumped my GF and started something with her, I never regretted, she was a good girl, good character, never cheated, never lost my trust, she was just crazy as all women are crazy when in love or when it comes to emotions in general.

 

[rjc149]

She had a million excuses saying how it was right after her ex fiancee left her...weak lonely point in her life...and the married guy keep aggressively pursuing her and she rejected all his initial advances but they worked together so he was always around her and always pursuing her.

…so it was all his fault, she had no choice but to let him stick his penis inside her vagina on a regular basis for a year.

This is a woman who refuses to accept accountability for her choices. “It wasn’t my intention, it just happened” type nonsense when a woman admits to cheating etc.

It sounds to me like you projected an ideal on her, and she fell short. I agree, this woman isn’t relationship material if that’s what you’re looking for.

 

[Zimbabwe]

Not sure why you suddenly decided to have morals when you are sleeping with random girls, who cares if she dated a married guy?

Don't you have multiple plates?

 

[2Rocky]

I've watched a woman who is a friend of my girlfriend develop a relationship with a married man and I made it clear (to my girlfriend), I would not be developing a relationship with her friend's married boyfriend. I suspect the wife knows all about it. I also suspect the boyfriend will never divorce his wife.

I really hate to see such a strong , smart woman get trapped in a situation like that. Thinking she has a real relationship but never getting more than the crumbs.

So in your case I'd probably ask her "What did you learn from that?" and I'd WANT to hear her answers. I would want to know if she is open to non monogamy because of that experience or diametrically on the other side of that viewpoint....