Being Funny Around Girls Doesn't Get You Laid

[soulforge]

I'm naturally quite a funny guy, especially amongst my male friends.

However around females that I am trying to lay, I'm having to really force myself to have a somewhat more serious & mysterious persona!

It's not my natural state.. However I think the funny guy is more likely to get friend zoned or begin to get viewed by her as corny or the jester to entertain her in the friend zone.

Some what do you think guys? How funny should a man be around a female?

80% serious/mysterious 20% Funny seems to be a good balance!

 

[derby1]

I take a mental note, of anything funny I say, or anything smooth, then I talk business for the rest of the convo within reason...

I withdraw anymore funny or smooth comments for most of the meet. or DM session

I used to be over smooth, and women used to get paranoid, I was doing it to everyone, it served me no favours

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I'm naturally quite a funny guy, especially amongst my male friends.

However around females that I am trying to lay, I'm having to really force myself to have a somewhat more serious & mysterious persona!

It's not my natural state.. However I think the funny guy is more likely to get friend zoned or begin to get viewed by her as corny or the jester to entertain her in the friend zone.

Some what do you think guys? How funny should a man be around a female?

80% serious/mysterious 20% Funny seems to be a good balance!

Nah, you need all 3 things at the same time...

Fun/funmy, intimacy and connection.

 

[cola]

You don’t want to be the “funny” guy per say. You want to be the clever, witty guy.

The trouble with the “funny guy” archetype is when over played you end up looking like a clown.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

http://ww25.sci-hub.tw/10.1111/j.1475-6811.1998.tb00174.x?subid1=20210314-1028-3311-ac20-64b718e4bf12

tldr: ‘men, expressing humor were rated as more desirable than nonhumorous individuals for a serious relationship and marriage, but only when these individuals were physically attractive.’

 

[LiveYourDream]

Mentally trying hard” or specifically “working” to say something funny will convey an undertone of approval seeking. When overdone it can be really unattractive and quite the turn off.

Let the naturally funnies/jokes flow when they do, by all means. Everyone loves to laugh. Don’t act like your own stand up comedy show, with joke after joke after joke either. Balance is important.

When someone is “working to be funny” that sense of “trying” can be perceived/felt by others. It is not as hidden, as “the worker” would hope. It is felt/observed by others. Working too hard to be funny conveys insecurity to rather than confidence.

Being with a “try-hard” jokester is not the same as with a “light and fun” jokester. It can start to feel more and more awkward when someone makes more and more jokes with an approval seeking undertone. Be aware and don’t become the approval seeking try-hard jokester.

If you find yourself “mentally trying hard” or specifically “working” to say something funny, question why.

If you suddenly have something funny to say, certainly share it. Everyone loves a good laugh when they happen. Just don’t start efforting and working to force such moments.

 

[Velasco]

https://www.skilledseducer.com/thre...-****y-funny-and-the-grand-master-style.23245

 

[EyeBRollin]

Humor works. But it has to be at the right time and
playful. Don’t be silly or corny.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

It's never one thing or another that leads to success...it is being able to mix in multiple things in interactions and bounce back and forth between them...

You can't just be funny because then she will think you are a cool guy but not really have any attraction towards you

You can't just be sexual because then she will think you are a desperate creepy dude who never gets laid

You can't just focus on building intimacy and connecting because then she will see you as just a friend.

It needs to be all 3 and mixing them in and out in different stages throughout the conversation.

 

[Velasco]

Silly and corny works too, mate. Field tested a billion times. Problem is 98% of people arent funny (most people fake laugh at jokes for social reasons). So they'll conclude funny doesnt work.

 

[Serenity]

80% serious/mysterious 20% Funny seems to be a good balance!

Is that all you are? A two dimensional person weighted 80% towards serious and 20% towards funny?

Being just the funny guy sure is worse, that's just one dimension of your personality. I'm sure you are more than just serious, funny or a ratio between those two. Maybe you have a philosophical side, passionate side, sexual side or anything else you can think of. Rich personalities are interesting, like there's so much in there she can't instantly figure all of you out and comes back for more and more and more.

Listen to @BackInTheGame78 too, same concept described differently.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Is that all you are? A two dimensional person weighted 80% towards serious and 20% towards funny?

Being just the funny guy sure is worse, that's just one dimension of your personality. I'm sure you are more than just serious, funny or a ratio between those two. Maybe you have a philosophical side, passionate side, sexual side or anything else you can think of. Rich personalities are interesting, like there's so much in there she can't instantly figure all of you out and comes back for more and more and more.

Listen to @BackInTheGame78 too, same concept described differently.

One thing that has really really helped me is my ability to tell stories and have them be interesting and fun and get the woman sucked into them...

If you want to learn how to do it properly watch late night talk shows when they have actors and actresses on and they tell stories...just think of 4 or 5 interesting stories you have in your life and follow their pattern when telling them and figure out ways to weave them into the convo...

After you do it long enough and keep using the same stories you'll be able to do it in your sleep and do it in an engaging way that gets them hooked in...

 

[Robert28]

Women like men with sociopathic traits, dark triad personality types. Funny doesn’t fit with that.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Women like men with sociopathic traits, dark triad personality types. Funny doesn’t fit with that.

Man you really are going far down the rabbit hole aren't you?

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

Difference between having a sense of humor and trying to be funny in the same way a "nice guy" tries to nice his way into *****, you can't funny your way into it either.

 

[Robert28]

Man you really are going far down the rabbit hole aren't you?

I quit lying to myself about what I was seeing years ago. It stops being a coincidence after awhile.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I quit lying to myself about what I was seeing years ago. It stops being a coincidence after awhile.

If that's what you need to believe then do it. Is it their sociopathic traits they love or simply that they put themselves above the woman in importance?

 

[Robert28]

If that's what you need to believe then do it. Is it their sociopathic traits they love or simply that they put themselves above the woman in importance?

Both. They view the sociopathic traits as “mysterious”. Women can’t love men, we all know that on here, women can’t love period. Sociopaths can’t love either, they aren’t capable of this due to their brain not being wired normally. Women are attracted to this ultimate challenge and get burned. Being the “nice guy” repels women because it’s a reflection of what they know they aren’t and it’s like a vampire being shown light, they don’t like it.

 

[Guitar_Whizz]

I've said this before, but 'being funny' actually kills sexual tension and just causes women to see you more of a goofy, 'mr entertainment' sort of guy. It's best to be minimal with humour when pursuing a girl romantically/sexually.

One of the biggest myths about dating is the old cliche 'you need to make a girl laugh if you want to get her'. What bulllsh*t! A lot of PUA gurus perpetuated the myth too, eg David DeAngelo with his ridiculous 'c*cky & funny' theory of attraction.

I'd rather be seen as a more serious, mysterious, direct kind of guy who is bluntly spoken and to the point rather than doing 'goofy banter' style game that a lot of guys think works.

Witty is better than funny actually. A sprinkling here and there is ok, but keep it minimal.

 

[Robert28]

I've said this before, but 'being funny' actually kills sexual tension and just causes women to see you more of a goofy, 'mr entertainment' sort of guy. It's best to be minimal with humour when pursuing a girl romantically/sexually.

One of the biggest myths about dating is the old cliche 'you need to make a girl laugh if you want to get her'. What bulllsh*t! A lot of PUA gurus perpetuated the myth too, eg David DeAngelo with his ridiculous '****y & funny' theory of attraction.

I'd rather be seen as more serious, mysterious, direct kind of guy who is bluntly spoken and to the point rather than doing 'goofy banter' style game that a lot of guys think works.

Witty is better than funny actually. A sprinkling here and there is ok, but keep it minimal.

Dark and mysterious wins over funny all day every day. I had to breakout of the funny habit too, it made women too comfortable with me and backfired on me.