Back to Basics: What to Talk About with Women

[nicksaiz65]

Hi guys. Since recovering, I've been going out again and consistently doing approaches so I can increase my pool of women even further.

I used to do primarily indirect Roosh style approaches. But, since I meet a lot of women during the day, I've since seen the merits of Direct Game. I've been running that exclusively.

I've found that a lot of my sets fizzle after the initial open though. I just don't even know what the hell to talk about. Half the time I have successful sets and I'm just riffing. The other half of the time, I just get stuck and I don't know what to say at all. Like yesterday, I ended up talking to a girl about jackets and literally the weather. How embarrassing. I will never let that happen again, hence this thread.

I never had this problem with indirect due to the very nature of it, but I don't want to have a ton of fizzling sets when I run Direct Game.

So I was hoping we could bring it back to the basics. What do you usually talk about with women in your cold approaches?

 

[r4zorsharp]

Ah this really gets me as one of those things like "you cant teach personality".. I would say if things don't come to you naturally, just work on become a better conversationalist in general, rather than a better conversationalist or communicator in "sets".
Especially because if you are just throwing out random conversation pieces in a situation where the person doesn't really want to have a conversation, it will come off as forced or random.. like just imagine yourself talking about something and the person thinking "hm okay.. why is this guy telling me this"

Or maybe develop you personality more (i dont mean this in a rude way).

Regardless, here are some tips: KEEP IT within the scope of the Present moment and the frame of conversation/setting/ relationship this person has to you, etc

Let's say you are talking to someone in a coffee shop.. You could talk about the weather, as you both came in from outside, or maybe the fact that you thought there would be longer lines or something.. or how u dont really drink coffee, but just hd a hankering for it.. You then have to quickly transition to something playful. like "you know what goes great with coffee?" "cheese".. "yeah believe it or not, cheese".. and depending on how she reacts to these seemingly trivial displays of 'I want to talk to you' (the message you are sending her).. you can easily take it a leap forward in the direction you want it to.. I mean, common things are cues for that: she starts laughing alot, even though what you said is not even raelly funny, or she touches her hair, tryin to prep herself up, or looks at your lips,chest, or eyes you up and down.. .. You could take that simple thing, and take it further "You know what else goes great with coffee?.." "ill give u ahint, its a 3 letter word".. play with her mind a bit.. she'll think sex of course, and u say "can u guess it" and if shes biting that, and reacts accordingly.. you can probably take her home that same moment and **** her

At the end of the day , none of it matters if the person is not in the mood to talk to you. Most PUA guys force themselves into situations and try to make it work.. But what really works for them are girls who want the same thing as them, or girls who are just drunk .. PUA's hit like 30 girls and strike out on most of them to capture 2-3 of them.. And then market those specific ones to make themselves seem like they're doing great.. The PUA's of today are basically just good at optimizing their APP DATING game.. their field work is just as good as any other guy who is a natural, if not often worse, or slightly better depending on the person.

I personally hate PUA's.. They're the bottom feeders of nightlife/game. Guys who market programs, try to make a living off of their average successes with women. If they were baseball players, they'd have TERRIBLE batting averages.. would not even be in the major leagues. But they just work at it so hard and go out of their way to make their lifestyle around it, that they actually look like they know what they're doing.. But most PUA's are pathetic. Its akin to being a comedian in the world of careers. Yeah, you have a fun job, you make sh.t money, but your life kinda revolves around it and it kinda gets u laid from time to time. You dont have any real friends.. and the only thing that makes u happy is getting laid and the ego boost of the attention of knowing all these men look up to you or seek your help or advice

 

[7onriverI f]

talk about having 5 fine ass women lined up on your bed and banging them in and out hard all rawdog. Girls love this but if its with condoms their pussies dry up. never ever mention condoms and always mention that your dik is 10 inches plus.

 

[r4zorsharp]

talk about having 5 fine ass women lined up on your bed and banging them in and out hard all rawdog. Girls love this but if its with condoms their pussies dry up. never ever mention condoms and always mention that your dik is 10 inches plus.

you sir are living in a fantasy. less porn, more real life. wake up.. you're not a Rockstar. or a Rapper.

how does this even relate to this Topic?

 

[7onriverI f]

you sir are living in a fantasy. less porn, more real life. wake up.. you're not a Rockstar. or a Rapper.

how does this even relate to this Topic?

Bro you need to wakeup. This shiit happens on the regular in my circles.

 

[In2theGame]

Hi guys. Since recovering, I've been going out again and consistently doing approaches so I can increase my pool of women even further.

I used to do primarily indirect Roosh style approaches. But, since I meet a lot of women during the day, I've since seen the merits of Direct Game. I've been running that exclusively.

I've found that a lot of my sets fizzle after the initial open though. I just don't even know what the hell to talk about. Half the time I have successful sets and I'm just riffing. The other half of the time, I just get stuck and I don't know what to say at all. Like yesterday, I ended up talking to a girl about jackets and literally the weather. How embarrassing. I will never let that happen again, hence this thread.

I never had this problem with indirect due to the very nature of it, but I don't want to have a ton of fizzling sets when I run Direct Game.

So I was hoping we could bring it back to the basics. What do you usually talk about with women in your cold approaches?

You know what to talk about but you don't verbalize it.

Keep these things in mind when approaching a Woman...

1. You're approaching that Woman because you are attracted to her and you think she is sexy/hot/cute/beautiful (Whatever you prefer to say). Let her know exactly that.
2. It's OK to fluff talk but avoid it as much as possible. The point of the conversation is to verbally express you're interest in her and want to meet up with her again in the near future.
3. You should make these interactions short by exchanging contact information (Phone Numbers only. Don't bother with social media or any of that other garbage. Have a direct way of contacting her)
4. Excuse yourself by letting her know that you want to set up a meetup in the near future. Done. Keep it moving.

You're 23 years old so you have a lot of time to practice you're approaching and verbal communications with Women. By the time you're in your later 20's, It should be a cake walk for you to approach Women. Unfortunately it's not an optimal time to be doing this due to the pandemic but it's good practice for you until things normalize a bit.

Side Note: Also focus on yourself in terms of looking good, feeling good and smelling good. You want to keep feeling good and confident in yourself when approaching and communicating Women.

 

[fastlife]

I think you're getting too caught up on the idea of direct/indirect. You can open direct--show intent--then talk about other things. You can open indirect and then go direct. It's all the same stuff. The only thing that really matters is the subcommunication: eye contact, tonality, the vibe you're creating with her.

Most of a successful approach--probably 95%--is just you getting to know the girl and her getting to know you. Some of this will be deep, a lot of it will just be small talk. You're probably pretty out of state, so it might be helpful to jot down some lines to throw out for when you feel things fizzling. But mostly I just make the conversation about her or me (or both). A couple easy ways to keep the convo going when you feel it start to fizzle:

• Cold reads: "You look like the type of girl that...," "Are you the type of girl that...?," "Are you a bank teller." Etc., etc. It helps to get a girl talking about herself, lets you get to know her to see if she's even a good fit, and she'll be curious about why you assumed whatever you assumed.
• Emotional spikes: These are just little pulls or pushes that spike a girls emotions. A little bit goes a long way: "Don't be racist," "Look at me when I'm talking to you," "Oh my god, you're so ______," "I thought you were _____ at first, but you're actually really ______."
• Qualifications/Disqualifications: "We'll never get along. You're too ______," "I like girls who are spontaneous and can keep up with me. What's the craziest sh1t you did this past month," You're way too innocent for me," "I really like that you're _____." Etc., etc. Let her feel like she has to earn you or is the process of earning you.
• Move her: Talk can only take you so far. Work on moving her around. "Wait, we're in the middle of the sidewalk. Come over here," and lead her a few feet away. "I was actually on the way to grab coffee. You seem chill. Come with me."
• Tell stories: When she says something, use it for a springing board for telling a story that lets her get to know you and understand her lifestyle. "That reminds me of that one that....," "You remind me of a girl that...." Hell, tell her that you had COVID and what it was like. When you tell her stories about your life, she'll tell you stories about hers.

Plus, small talk isn't the worst thing ever. Talk to her about jackets or jackets, but then use it as a springboard for a cold read or for talking about the future or to tease her. With jackets it's like, "I bet you rock leather jackets you little bad ass" or "You don't own a fur jacket do you? Good that's disgusting." With weather it's like, "It's so cold. We should just cuddle up by the fire and I'll make hot chocolate" or "It's so nice out. Let's hit the park." Just keep it going. If she's staying to talk with you that means she's either 1.) attracted to you or 2.) could be attracted to you if you convey more of your personality. She wouldn't stop and talk with a smelly, homeless man or some creepy guy. It doesn't have to be anything fancy--the bar is super low.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Talk about her. Start with basic questions. Then ask follow ups to her answer. Make sure they are open ended. Women like to chat so they’ll go on for 3-5 minutes on one question.

 

[Vasiliev]

Just.. whatever pops into your mind. The best state a man can ever reach is where we are able to effortlessly go brain to mouth. It naturally checks a few of the big boxes:

1. It makes her feel at ease, and thus, safe.
2. We're probably a lot funnier when we're like that.
3. We sound more passionate when we're like that.
4. We sound more extroverted and sociable.

 

[Poonani Maker]

You have to ascertain what kind of woman you're dealing with here, as Each one is different, in that, she could be from a tribe of sorts, and Nothing you say could sway her (as her expectations are astronomical), and just simple talk could get the cops/security called on you. Then you've got women who like to babble. Women from poor backgrounds, ones from rich, ones middle class, ones from Christian conservative families, ones from no-father homes, trashy ones to ones who try to do 'good' or have some semblance of a conscience. You calibrate Your speech to what you've sized up before you, like a car dealer would. You go from there, then you calibrate the more you talk to/with her. Go off your initial take or instinct about her, but be able to bend, to shape to where you say "ok, this is her." Of course, all of em are fvckin airheads and nervous/jittery, but you control you trying not to let her volatility affect you even if she insults you, spits on you, hits you. The more you're with women, the more they tell you their problems (of the current day or of late). I can't stand that cause I'm like, "Well, what do you want me to do about it? (b!tch)." I'm like I don't know and I don't care. I'm not your dad. Of course, we all prefer youthful women. Nothing beyond 32 I guess. It's all about sex.

 

[nicksaiz65]

You know what to talk about but you don't verbalize it.

Keep these things in mind when approaching a Woman...

1. You're approaching that Woman because you are attracted to her and you think she is sexy/hot/cute/beautiful (Whatever you prefer to say). Let her know exactly that.
2. It's OK to fluff talk but avoid it as much as possible. The point of the conversation is to verbally express you're interest in her and want to meet up with her again in the near future.
3. You should make these interactions short by exchanging contact information (Phone Numbers only. Don't bother with social media or any of that other garbage. Have a direct way of contacting her)
4. Excuse yourself by letting her know that you want to set up a meetup in the near future. Done. Keep it moving.

You're 23 years old so you have a lot of time to practice you're approaching and verbal communications with Women. By the time you're in your later 20's, It should be a cake walk for you to approach Women. Unfortunately it's not an optimal time to be doing this due to the pandemic but it's good practice for you until things normalize a bit.

Side Note: Also focus on yourself in terms of looking good, feeling good and smelling good. You want to keep feeling good and confident in yourself when approaching and communicating Women.

For sure! Open, show intent, vibe, close.

Yeah, it is a little weird during the pandemic for sure. Surprisingly, I've found that a lot of women are open to being approached even with the pandemic going on.

I definitely agree with that side note. I've been doing the self improvement hardcore during lockdown, and the difference in confidence with my approaches has been astronomical.

 

[nicksaiz65]

I think you're getting too caught up on the idea of direct/indirect. You can open direct--show intent--then talk about other things. You can open indirect and then go direct. It's all the same stuff. The only thing that really matters is the subcommunication: eye contact, tonality, the vibe you're creating with her.

Most of a successful approach--probably 95%--is just you getting to know the girl and her getting to know you. Some of this will be deep, a lot of it will just be small talk. You're probably pretty out of state, so it might be helpful to jot down some lines to throw out for when you feel things fizzling. But mostly I just make the conversation about her or me (or both). A couple easy ways to keep the convo going when you feel it start to fizzle:

• Cold reads: "You look like the type of girl that...," "Are you the type of girl that...?," "Are you a bank teller." Etc., etc. It helps to get a girl talking about herself, lets you get to know her to see if she's even a good fit, and she'll be curious about why you assumed whatever you assumed.
• Emotional spikes: These are just little pulls or pushes that spike a girls emotions. A little bit goes a long way: "Don't be racist," "Look at me when I'm talking to you," "Oh my god, you're so ______," "I thought you were _____ at first, but you're actually really ______."
• Qualifications/Disqualifications: "We'll never get along. You're too ______," "I like girls who are spontaneous and can keep up with me. What's the craziest sh1t you did this past month," You're way too innocent for me," "I really like that you're _____." Etc., etc. Let her feel like she has to earn you or is the process of earning you.
• Move her: Talk can only take you so far. Work on moving her around. "Wait, we're in the middle of the sidewalk. Come over here," and lead her a few feet away. "I was actually on the way to grab coffee. You seem chill. Come with me."
• Tell stories: When she says something, use it for a springing board for telling a story that lets her get to know you and understand her lifestyle. "That reminds me of that one that....," "You remind me of a girl that...." Hell, tell her that you had COVID and what it was like. When you tell her stories about your life, she'll tell you stories about hers.

Plus, small talk isn't the worst thing ever. Talk to her about jackets or jackets, but then use it as a springboard for a cold read or for talking about the future or to tease her. With jackets it's like, "I bet you rock leather jackets you little bad ass" or "You don't own a fur jacket do you? Good that's disgusting." With weather it's like, "It's so cold. We should just cuddle up by the fire and I'll make hot chocolate" or "It's so nice out. Let's hit the park." Just keep it going. If she's staying to talk with you that means she's either 1.) attracted to you or 2.) could be attracted to you if you convey more of your personality. She wouldn't stop and talk with a smelly, homeless man or some creepy guy. It doesn't have to be anything fancy--the bar is super low.

Yeah, you got me there haha. Getting back into it, I was definitely thinking of it in a black/white direct/indirect sort of sense. I'm definitely focusing on my subcommunications as well, since they're the most important part.

It takes a lot of pressure off knowing that it's literally just small talk and you don't have to do that much. I'm definitely trying to work more cold reads into my sets. One positive I've noticed is that I see a lot of girls qualifying themselves to me when I do these daygame approaches. That's a good sign.

Those are some good lines! I'll have to steal them next time I end up talking about jackets with girls haha. I'm sure the wittiness will come back to me more as I get back into the groove of approaching, and get back in state.

 

[nicksaiz65]

Talk about her. Start with basic questions. Then ask follow ups to her answer. Make sure they are open ended. Women like to chat so they’ll go on for 3-5 minutes on one question.

Yeah, open ended questions are key for sure. It's reassuring to know that it's totally fine to start with basic questions when approaching.

Tips on not falling into the dreaded "interview mode?" I'm guessing that as long as you space your questions out and keep them open ended, ramble in between them, and flirt with her you should be fine.

 

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

If it's a younger chick, and it usually is, I ask her to show me a cool video off her Instagram as an icebreaker, then I show her a cool one on mine, exchange Instagram, have her number basically when you do that, simple

 

[BadBoy89]

What do you usually talk about with women in your cold approaches?

Talk about anything except yourself or politics. Listen to what she says and RESPOND. That's how you get people to CONNECT with you. But you have to close in 5 minutes or less. There is not an infinite amount of time to close women. Get in, get the date, and get out.

 

[darksprezzatura]

I think you're getting too caught up on the idea of direct/indirect. You can open direct--show intent--then talk about other things. You can open indirect and then go direct. It's all the same stuff. The only thing that really matters is the subcommunication: eye contact, tonality, the vibe you're creating with her.

Most of a successful approach--probably 95%--is just you getting to know the girl and her getting to know you. Some of this will be deep, a lot of it will just be small talk. You're probably pretty out of state, so it might be helpful to jot down some lines to throw out for when you feel things fizzling. But mostly I just make the conversation about her or me (or both). A couple easy ways to keep the convo going when you feel it start to fizzle:

• Cold reads: "You look like the type of girl that...," "Are you the type of girl that...?," "Are you a bank teller." Etc., etc. It helps to get a girl talking about herself, lets you get to know her to see if she's even a good fit, and she'll be curious about why you assumed whatever you assumed.
• Emotional spikes: These are just little pulls or pushes that spike a girls emotions. A little bit goes a long way: "Don't be racist," "Look at me when I'm talking to you," "Oh my god, you're so ______," "I thought you were _____ at first, but you're actually really ______."
• Qualifications/Disqualifications: "We'll never get along. You're too ______," "I like girls who are spontaneous and can keep up with me. What's the craziest sh1t you did this past month," You're way too innocent for me," "I really like that you're _____." Etc., etc. Let her feel like she has to earn you or is the process of earning you.
• Move her: Talk can only take you so far. Work on moving her around. "Wait, we're in the middle of the sidewalk. Come over here," and lead her a few feet away. "I was actually on the way to grab coffee. You seem chill. Come with me."
• Tell stories: When she says something, use it for a springing board for telling a story that lets her get to know you and understand her lifestyle. "That reminds me of that one that....," "You remind me of a girl that...." Hell, tell her that you had COVID and what it was like. When you tell her stories about your life, she'll tell you stories about hers.

Plus, small talk isn't the worst thing ever. Talk to her about jackets or jackets, but then use it as a springboard for a cold read or for talking about the future or to tease her. With jackets it's like, "I bet you rock leather jackets you little bad ass" or "You don't own a fur jacket do you? Good that's disgusting." With weather it's like, "It's so cold. We should just cuddle up by the fire and I'll make hot chocolate" or "It's so nice out. Let's hit the park." Just keep it going. If she's staying to talk with you that means she's either 1.) attracted to you or 2.) could be attracted to you if you convey more of your personality. She wouldn't stop and talk with a smelly, homeless man or some creepy guy. It doesn't have to be anything fancy--the bar is super low.

Bump

 

[nicksaiz65]

I think you're getting too caught up on the idea of direct/indirect. You can open direct--show intent--then talk about other things. You can open indirect and then go direct. It's all the same stuff. The only thing that really matters is the subcommunication: eye contact, tonality, the vibe you're creating with her.

Most of a successful approach--probably 95%--is just you getting to know the girl and her getting to know you. Some of this will be deep, a lot of it will just be small talk. You're probably pretty out of state, so it might be helpful to jot down some lines to throw out for when you feel things fizzling. But mostly I just make the conversation about her or me (or both). A couple easy ways to keep the convo going when you feel it start to fizzle:

• Cold reads: "You look like the type of girl that...," "Are you the type of girl that...?," "Are you a bank teller." Etc., etc. It helps to get a girl talking about herself, lets you get to know her to see if she's even a good fit, and she'll be curious about why you assumed whatever you assumed.
• Emotional spikes: These are just little pulls or pushes that spike a girls emotions. A little bit goes a long way: "Don't be racist," "Look at me when I'm talking to you," "Oh my god, you're so ______," "I thought you were _____ at first, but you're actually really ______."
• Qualifications/Disqualifications: "We'll never get along. You're too ______," "I like girls who are spontaneous and can keep up with me. What's the craziest sh1t you did this past month," You're way too innocent for me," "I really like that you're _____." Etc., etc. Let her feel like she has to earn you or is the process of earning you.
• Move her: Talk can only take you so far. Work on moving her around. "Wait, we're in the middle of the sidewalk. Come over here," and lead her a few feet away. "I was actually on the way to grab coffee. You seem chill. Come with me."
• Tell stories: When she says something, use it for a springing board for telling a story that lets her get to know you and understand her lifestyle. "That reminds me of that one that....," "You remind me of a girl that...." Hell, tell her that you had COVID and what it was like. When you tell her stories about your life, she'll tell you stories about hers.

Plus, small talk isn't the worst thing ever. Talk to her about jackets or jackets, but then use it as a springboard for a cold read or for talking about the future or to tease her. With jackets it's like, "I bet you rock leather jackets you little bad ass" or "You don't own a fur jacket do you? Good that's disgusting." With weather it's like, "It's so cold. We should just cuddle up by the fire and I'll make hot chocolate" or "It's so nice out. Let's hit the park." Just keep it going. If she's staying to talk with you that means she's either 1.) attracted to you or 2.) could be attracted to you if you convey more of your personality. She wouldn't stop and talk with a smelly, homeless man or some creepy guy. It doesn't have to be anything fancy--the bar is super low.

Bringing back this post even though it’s older lol. But, what you say in here is very true.

I used to think that when I opened indirect, I had to stay indirect and could never go direct later on(or ask her a personal question, or anything.) This made my conversations stilted and easy to get stuck. That was an old Roosh rule... but I’ve discarded it now.

Since I’ve discarded that rule now(I can jump the rails and talk about literally whatever I want) my conversations have been so effortless and free flowing.

 

[Clamslammer]

Hi guys. Since recovering, I've been going out again and consistently doing approaches so I can increase my pool of women even further.

I used to do primarily indirect Roosh style approaches. But, since I meet a lot of women during the day, I've since seen the merits of Direct Game. I've been running that exclusively.

I've found that a lot of my sets fizzle after the initial open though. I just don't even know what the hell to talk about. Half the time I have successful sets and I'm just riffing. The other half of the time, I just get stuck and I don't know what to say at all. Like yesterday, I ended up talking to a girl about jackets and literally the weather. How embarrassing. I will never let that happen again, hence this thread.

I never had this problem with indirect due to the very nature of it, but I don't want to have a ton of fizzling sets when I run Direct Game.

So I was hoping we could bring it back to the basics. What do you usually talk about with women in your cold approaches?

Most guys think that it is their fault they cannot hold the conversation but the fact is most of these chicks now have zero personality or any stories to tell. Their lives revolve around instagram and tick thot so what are they actually going to talk to you about. If she is not engaged into the convo right away you dodged a bullet. Move on to a chick that has a personality