This woman I've met... nonsense/red flag behavior

[Blacksheep]

So I met a woman from a city that is 1 hour from here. We talked, I went to this city, got a hotel... She met me there, we had sex after 5 min of talk... then go out to a restaurant and she slept there with me. Ok, very good until now.

Then, I told her that she should come to my town next time, she could stay at my place... As I went there the first time. She told me ok... After that, she texted me telling me that she wanted me to go there again before she comes, cause she wanted to present me to their parent. I told her I wasnt comfortable doing that... And as I went there the first time, it would be good if she come now.

Some days passed... She decided that she would come this next weekens... BUT, aftera few days she told me: "I'm affraid of coming there, I don't even know you right... and I would be in your home and you can do something to me."

I thougth: ok, she met me on a hotel for the first time, she had sex with me and slept there with me. And she didn't know me... Now she is telling that. It didn't make much sense for me... But I realized that in somehow she wanted to desperate present myself to her parents (even telling me that she didn't know me so much)... Okay girl, you say that you don't know me and is affraid... but you want to bring this guy you don't know to your parents house so they can meet me? This is pure crap.

I told her that this is totally nonsense, and why she would bring me to her parents house if she said that... and told that for me it was another thing... like a excuse to don't come or maybe she found another guy out there and wanted a reason to leave. And said: "If you don't wanna come, just dont come... no need for all this story."

She got pissed off... called me selfish and that she was scared with my reaction to this. And started to spread negative words toward me. Then I said: "Ok, if you have such concept about me, and I'm such a bad guy... Why you're still here talking to me?" And then we stopped texting.

Next day: she called me, telling that she doesnt want to lose what we had, she would relevate that and forgive me this time. But both would have to make concessions for this to work... LOL.

I said that I understood her, that my intent wasn't be selfish... That I was just transparent with what I felt and had no reason to not tell that.

Then she said that if I want to be with her, I would have to go there meet her parents, and the first time she would come to my town, she would bring her parents!!!! (WTF?)

I again told that I would not do this... that I wasn't comfortable with that... That if she come here next time, I could go there the next.

So she took 1 day to answer and told: "Better we stop this, because I had a relationship like that... and my ex always tried to impose stuffs just like you are doing... and this is abusive. Better we stop that."

I just replied: "Yes, thats better. Its just interesting how you tell me I'm imposing something to you... but in reality you imposed something and start to play around that and got really mad at any no I told you. Just because I said I didn't want to do that."

And just blocked her.

 

[ThisIsSparta]

That woman is batshyt crazy. Good thing you blocked her, keep the demons out!

 

[Blacksheep]

That woman is batshyt crazy. Good thing you blocked her, keep the demons out!

That experience was really weird.

 

[ThisIsSparta]

I met 2 girls over the years that wanted to introduce me to someone the next day after the first date(both ended with overnight stays).
I got the hell outa there as fast as i could, fortunately they were not THAT crazy to go aggressive.

 

[Blacksheep]

I met 2 girls over the years that wanted to introduce me to someone the next day after the first date(both ended with overnight stays).
I got the hell outa there as fast as i could, fortunately they were not THAT crazy to go aggressive.

Yep! When a woman want to present you to her parents so quickly... there is something reallyyyy wrong about that.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Yep! When a woman want to present you to her parents so quickly... there is something reallyyyy wrong about that.

They do this not because they want to marry you ASAP. They do this with "good guys". They'll show their parents a "good guy", kind of trying to validate against all the shady dudes that they prefer to fvck with.

 

[Blacksheep]

They do this not because they want to marry you ASAP. They do this with "good guys". They'll show their parents a "good guy", kind of trying to validate against all the shady dudes that they prefer to fvck with.

Thats true!

As she said after we had sex: "I like so much to have sex..." with a shy face.

And I think as she saw that she couldn't control me to be her puppy... she started those emotional games on whatsapp.

 

[Blacksheep]

I have a different take on this. She wanted her parents approval on this guy. She’s made some bad choices in the past and her parents really chastised her.
Even she knows that she has made bad choices in men and doesn’t know why. She only goes by what she feels.
This may not be a bad idea on her part. It doesn’t mean that she necessarily wants to get married, though her parents want that for her.

Thats a good point too! It makes sense.

 

[ThisIsSparta]

I have a different take on this. She wanted her parents approval on this guy. She’s made some bad choices in the past and her parents really chastised her.
Even she knows that she has made bad choices in men and doesn’t know why. She only goes by what she feels.
This may not be a bad idea on her part. It doesn’t mean that she necessarily wants to get married, though her parents want that for her.

So basicaly in this theory the girl is drawn to badguys and her parents are supposed to tell her which one she is supposed to be into as she cant be trusted to choose for herself.

Get the hell outa there!

 

[ThisIsSparta]

It’s the parents job to keep their girls under wraps and keep them in line sexually.

Do you think these older cultures don’t know the nature of women? Hahaha

When she ****s a unknown guy on first date in a hotel, they are obviously doing a ****ty job with this girl so far. ;-)

 

[ThisIsSparta]

If you have sisters, so did your parents. Probably much worse. Your sisters didn’t care one way or another as long as they don’t interfere with her fuk fest’s.

Pure speculation, as is your theory about the girl/womans parents and cultural background.

@Blacksheep How old is she by the way?

 

[bat soup]

She probably wanted her parents to meet the father of their grandchildren.

 

[Blacksheep]

Pure speculation, as is your theory about the girl/womans parents and cultural background.

@Blacksheep How old is she by the way?

She is 27 yrs old.

The way she behave out of nothing, cause we were talking normal... having good conversations. Then out of nothing she did that... I would guess that she wanted to find a excuse.

As I've met her on tinder, probably found someone else. Idk... base on what happened, its weird.

 

[Blacksheep]

She probably wanted her parents to meet the father of their grandchildren.

haha... I'm running out of this.

 

[Blacksheep]

Of course it’s speculation. It’s mathematical. I’m sure the sisters were/are pristine and so was the mother.

I've saw some parents being worry about some women sexual behavior... but most of those women lies to their parents.

It's very complicated to control that... Some cases might work, some don't.

The more I date some women out there, the more I observe how things are really messed up. Like I use to say: "Behind the curtains exists the most dirty secrets."

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I've saw some parents being worry about some women sexual behavior... but most of those women lies to their parents.

It's very complicated to control that... Some cases might work, some don't.

The more I date some women out there, the more I observe how things are really messed up. Like I use to say: "Behind the curtains exists the most dirty secrets."

But we tend to focus purely on the negative here.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

If men could suddenly look into women’s minds and see the memory pictures they have of their sexual encounters, society as we know it would immediately revert with women out in the cold until they snapped to.

Describe what we would see? Describe the roles and uses she has for each of the men in her life? Describe how much she cares? Describe what she tells herself? Describe how she sees these men?

 

[Serenity]

I thougth: ok, she met me on a hotel for the first time, she had sex with me and slept there with me. And she didn't know me... Now she is telling that. It didn't make much sense for me...

Had similar situation (not the rest of it) before. Met a girl at a party, we made out and she seemed REALLY into me. She wanted me on Facebook because she had to leave early, nothing more happened that night. A couple days later I ask her out, but she's dodging it, fair enough, sometimes that happens.

A year later I randomly meet her at a bar, we stop to talk for a little while (no hard feelings) and she invites me to a party she's having two weeks from then. I make note of it and I come to the party, we talk a lot, make out and are having a good time. The rest of the party deteriorates into some sort of pathetic drama and most people leave. I'm left with this girl who's the host, spend the night, we fvck and she's loving it. She's awkward the next day, I am not really. Try to contact her a couple days later and she tells me she wouldn't be comfortable alone with me even in a public place. I try to convince her in about 5 more back and forth texts before I just give up and move on.

Yeah, what the fvck is that?! I was at her house, naked in bed for an entire night, having sex and she's "uncomfortable" meeting me again? It truly doesn't make sense.

Now, I do suspect she just wasn't interested in anything beyond a ONS and I would prefer she told me that rather than serve me nonsense.

Also, regarding meeting parents after a first date, it would be a hard pass for me too. You could have flipped the script on that, told her you don't know her well enough to meet her parents. She sounds crazy though, you made the right choice.

 

[Blacksheep]

Had similar situation (not the rest of it) before. Met a girl at a party, we made out and she seemed REALLY into me. She wanted me on Facebook because she had to leave early, nothing more happened that night. A couple days later I ask her out, but she's dodging it, fair enough, sometimes that happens.

A year later I randomly meet her at a bar, we stop to talk for a little while (no hard feelings) and she invites me to a party she's having two weeks from then. I make note of it and I come to the party, we talk a lot, make out and are having a good time. The rest of the party deteriorates into some sort of pathetic drama and most people leave. I'm left with this girl who's the host, spend the night, we fvck and she's loving it. She's awkward the next day, I am not really. Try to contact her a couple days later and she tells me she wouldn't be comfortable alone with me even in a public place. I try to convince her in about 5 more back and forth texts before I just give up and move on.

Yeah, what the fvck is that?! I was at her house, naked in bed for an entire night, having sex and she's "uncomfortable" meeting me again? It truly doesn't make sense.

Now, I do suspect she just wasn't interested in anything beyond a ONS and I would prefer she told me that rather than serve me nonsense.

Also, regarding meeting parents after a first date, it would be a hard pass for me too. You could have flipped the script on that, told her you don't know her well enough to meet her parents. She sounds crazy though, you made the right choice.

Thats weird man. I dont understand so well why they do such drama and games... But it was not necessary.

Maybe its a way to get out something without feeling guilty.

 

[Serenity]

Thats weird man. I dont understand so well why they do such drama and games... But it was not necessary.

Maybe its a way to get out something without feeling guilty.

I didn't sense she was being dramatic really, probably just afraid of being honest about "rejecting" me. I know many women have had bad experiences with some "nice guys" totally losing their sh!t when told no, so they start making excuses instead of being upfront. I get why some women are so indirect, especially if they're a bit shy and non-confrontational as she was.

In person she was a really chill girl, only her friends were crazy. With the exception of her best friend, she was cool too.