Types of marriages

[Mbuckets82]

So all my buddies got married around the same time and all seem to be in the same type of marriage. Are there different kinds? What I’m speaking of is when it comes to making a decision, female oriented. It seems to work for all of them as they’re approaching 10 years and me being the divorced one they think what I say doesn’t hold any water.
They’ll preach to me things like team work and sharing in the decision process. But I’ll see on social media a wife saying she allowed him to buy a car but then he confesses his love to her (beta). Another is becoming super liberal Like his wife, which I see conflicts with red pill awareness.
As the years go by and especially my reading up on the red pill we don’t see things the same way.
Me I’ll doubt I’ll marry again since I got burned but even the thought scares the sh:t out of me.
But for those married, how do the guys lead but stilll have their wives in on the input but remain in the feminine?
Example, home improvement needs to get done between two projects, the guy feels the floors Of the house but his wife wants the deck to be redone....if the guy leads isn’t he just doing the floors?

 

[metalwater]

So all my buddies got married around the same time and all seem to be in the same type of marriage. Are there different kinds? What I’m speaking of is when it comes to making a decision, female oriented. It seems to work for all of them as they’re approaching 10 years and me being the divorced one they think what I say doesn’t hold any water.
They’ll preach to me things like team work and sharing in the decision process. But I’ll see on social media a wife saying she allowed him to buy a car but then he confesses his love to her (beta). Another is becoming super liberal Like his wife, which I see conflicts with red pill awareness.
As the years go by and especially my reading up on the red pill we don’t see things the same way.
Me I’ll doubt I’ll marry again since I got burned but even the thought scares the sh:t out of me.
But for those married, how do the guys lead but stilll have their wives in on the input but remain in the feminine?
Example, home improvement needs to get done between two projects, the guy feels the floors Of the house but his wife wants the deck to be redone....if the guy leads isn’t he just doing the floors?

well, many of the ones that claim to really get it to say to not be married. meaning this is a no-win scenario that you ask.

the idea is to NOT worry about the dynamic and just take care of business. if we know more about what needs to be done then do it our way. however... she might know more about the topic, in that case, recognize that and tell her why we see her idea better. some real reason if it exists.

all to care about is doing the best repair the has the most need or value. if she can tell us something that is true about that then she is actually valuable. if she is just nagging, then follow with what is known as the priority even if she screams at us. (easier said than done).

In the past when I had a woman that completely submitted (would apologize for any wrong before confronted. and it was not often) she never corrected me. if I asked her preference she would give an honest one, but other than that she was delighted to live in my choices; delighted to be part of my world no matter what I chose it did not matter because it was me. when I made mistakes, she was ready and willing to help fix it in any way I thought would do it.

All of the little things in life as a couple really don't matter much. Each one is important in itself but on the stage is only a prop. she either is delighted to live in your choices or is not. I know how it feels both ways.

we can learn to manage the feelings and to push buttons on the right times but to really have her open and being be at peace because of us is a mystery. if it is not that way, it does not matter if we do the repair she likes or ours as we will be wrong for one reason or the other.

 

[Focal core]

One of the core element in marriage or any kind of relationship is trust and its an ever expanding sense of trust, it doesnt matter who do on what type of chores, the focus are to make the marriage grow.

Any relationship were base on building trust along with growing admiration and respect to their significant other.

There is a partnership of two individuals committed to enhancing each other's strengths, and balancing each other's weaknesses. A stronger, more highly functioning unit than only one, which thrives on mutual support and protection, and encourages/celebrates autonomous growth.

Healthy marriage must continually work to solidify and enhance the marital bond, so partners may continue to grow alongside each other, and their union reflects these developmental changes.

Sadly too many times when Intimacy that stops growing, has started dying, comes the inevitable saperation.

Finding a true girl for wife materials sadly has become a great challenge, their species has become greatly scarce and extinct.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

One of the core element in marriage or any kind of relationship is trust and its an ever expanding sense of trust, it doesnt matter who do on what type of chores, the focus are to make the marriage grow.

Any relationship were base on building trust along with growing admiration and respect to their significant other.

There is a partnership of two individuals committed to enhancing each other's strengths, and balancing each other's weaknesses. A stronger, more highly functioning unit than only one, which thrives on mutual support and protection, and encourages/celebrates autonomous growth.

Healthy marriage must continually work to solidify and enhance the marital bond, so partners may continue to grow alongside each other, and their union reflects these developmental changes.

Sadly too many times when Intimacy that stops growing, has started dying, comes the inevitable saperation.

Finding a true girl for wife materials sadly has become a great challenge, their species has become greatly scarce and extinct.

They used to be taught how to treat their man by the elders. Now their teachings are different.

 

[Focal core]

They used to be taught how to treat their man by the elders. Now their teachings are different.

Lol.. A lot of unatural influences, think making money is hard? Try finding loyalty.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Lol.. A lot of unatural influences, think making money is hard? Try finding loyalty.

LOL. Loyal to their agenda.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

LOL. Loyal to their agenda.

Making money is easy in comparison

 

[Focal core]

Making money is easy in comparison

By long margins

 

[Black Widow Void]

I'm curious about something.
Of the married friends you mention; what's their family background?
Domineering mothers?...
Did they grow up in a divorced environment?
Was there an active father present.. and did they have a positive relationship with him?

Also... how were they with women during their bachelor years:
Were they successful?
Or... did they pick low hanging fruit?

Personally, I'm not very "pro-marriage."
Seems to me that the difference between a married woman and a single woman ...
is about 60 lbs.

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

Humans are complicated people.

We tend to cover our weaknesses with reframed strengths.

She may be afraid to tell him no when he wants to buy a car.

He may be afraid to ask her directly.

She they each kind of beat around the push, come to a decision, and then each pretend they got the upper hand.

Ladies who get a lot of attention and have plenty of floozy friends may be willing to put up with less hassle.

Fatter ladies with self esteem issues may be terrified of being alone much more than they don't like sleeping next to their equally fat husband.

There's very little external constraints keeping people together, like there was a few decades ago.

Society seems to be getting more and more short sighted/hedonistic by the day.

The "type" of marriages is based on the "type" of people in the marriage.

Many people today are of very low quality.

Inability to delay gratification, live with means, etc.

Going blind into a marriage without concern for any of these issues would be like asking your dog to give you investing advice.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

This is a futile effort. One doesn’t find loyalty. He demands it...or else. If he decides on a relationship. He’s the prize. Not her.

Relationship on his terms. Shes disrespectful, drop her.

 

[bcude]

Lol.. A lot of unatural influences, think making money is hard? Try finding loyalty.

Easy, go to the nearest dog shelter and you'll find loyalty for life.

Cheap too.

 

[metalwater]

They used to be taught how to treat their man by the elders. Now their teachings are different.

yes. this is a huge thing, huge. in US we might be into more than one generation now that does not do that. almost forgotten.

 

[metalwater]

yes. this is a huge thing, huge. in US we might be into more than one generation now that does not do that. almost forgotten.

in Asia it is still done, but not 100% like before. Still some clans that will enforce behavior on the rest of the clan; outside the big cities.

 

[Lynx nkaf]

Until Family laws change, there is only one kind of marriage. The kind where the woman has the man by the balls.

facts.

and on top of that, they're not going to be lobbied to change laws anytime soon because girls will still have the babies out of wedlock.

*shrugging shoulders*

If men don't care to get cracking on these law changes, reproducing women aren't seeming to care either way sooooooo........

 

[mrgoodstuff]

We are a minimum of 20-25 years away from that.
Unless men can reduce the number of feminine men.

It would have to be canings in the street.

 

[metalwater]

It would have to be canings in the street.

who should be punished in this way and for what crime?

 

[metalwater]

We are a minimum of 20-25 years away from that.
Unless men can reduce the number of feminine men.

war?

genetic manipulation?

how about approaching it from the other side; punish men harshly(even termination) for breeding out of a contract. leaving woman only with ONE option. enforce the contracts till death do us part... genetic testing including abortions with harsh punishment for breaking contract (even termination). If women have no option, they will strive to improve what they have.

as long as men want to have many options/plates and the statistical numbers are about 50/50 for men/women the issue will persist. as long as women can win by the dual strategy they will continue; no reason not to.

red pilling(alone) all the men, doesn't solve the problem.

 

[Lynx nkaf]

facts.

and on top of that, they're not going to be lobbied to change laws anytime soon because girls will still have the babies out of wedlock.

*shrugging shoulders*

If men don't care to get cracking on these law changes, reproducing women aren't seeming to care either way sooooooo........

I’ve spent a lot of time and effort on this particular problem goodstuff. When I first got here I put just a little bit of it in a thread and the clouds opened with thunder. Hahaha

in quite a bit of indignant pain->frustrated that change isn't happening quicker->his words have been valuable and breakthrough-worthy to me in particular.

I think I'm supposed to do something with what I've learned here. How can I assist?(will not participate in caning however)

 

[metalwater]

No of course not. I don’t believe in “punishing” either side either. It doesn’t work.

It is easy for someone on here to say “Lead”, but in the end, no one can be forced to actually follow. Nobody actually owes their loyalty or support.

It must happen because it’s in their best interest.

yes. the interest of men and women do not align except for the care of children. before birth control, the family would be like 14 kids with a woman always another baby, and the man working so hard to pay for that. the brothers would be close and the sisters also with the father in the lead and the mother working constantly to fix things.

if not by force then how to align a man's wish for sex and affection with a woman wish for power and status. now the woman is free of the many children and entitled to survival without the consent of the man. probably a rhetorical question.

if a woman will motivate her man, he will provide her much power and status. but she does not. who is to blame, the man for being a man or the woman for being a woman. science has broken the original plan with birth control and medicine. without those, the population stays smaller and lots of babies to care for. seems like you will have some post in some time that has a suggestion of how to solve, that would be awesome.