Is this a red flag? Woman that plays virtual life games...

[Blacksheep]

I've met a girl, she is kind interesting... She split the account when we went out and have her own house and job.

But she likes to play a game similar to second life, called avakin. I know there is a ton of guys on those games looking for women and virtual relationships or even nudes or virtual sex.

Idk, my bet is that she might use it to get some male validation or fill some kind of fantasy.

Should it be a red flag or its just ok? Would like to hear some ideas on that.

 

[stovepipe]

Like I always say, if your gut is telling you something might be a red flag, odds are it is.

 

[Blacksheep]

Like I always say, if your gut is telling you something might be a red flag, odds are it is.

Yeah man! That gut instinct most of times never lie. And I already had a lot of bad results not trusting on it.

Thanks for your feedback!

 

[2Rocky]

It's make believe with graphics. So she is escaping to it from her boring menial life. So you are going to have to fill that "hole in her soul" and become her source of validation. Now she might make you that in her mind and not take too much effort on your part or you may have to compete with her artificial reality.

It is a red flag but if you want a potentially codependent woman...here is your chance.

 

[Lookatu]

I wouldn't necessarily dismiss her soley on that but approach carefully and invest low until your gut tells you otherwise.

 

[Blacksheep]

It's make believe with graphics. So she is escaping to it from her boring menial life. So you are going to have to fill that "hole in her soul" and become her source of validation. Now she might make you that in her mind and not take too much effort on your part or you may have to compete with her artificial reality.

It is a red flag but if you want a potentially codependent woman...here is your chance.

That make senses man.

The thing about it is, in any moment that I stop to fullfill her validation desire, she will find it on this virtual life games with males from anywhere... But it can also happen on real life, when even this virtual stop fullfilling her.

I dont think its worth a codependent woman. I had some past experiences with this and it drains our energy. Also a lot of fights and dramas about not giving the attention they desire.

It seems a dangerous path.

 

[Blacksheep]

I wouldn't necessarily dismiss her soley on that but approach carefully and invest low until your gut tells you otherwise.

Thats true man!

I feel that I must be very careful, dont want to get envolved with someone who can be a problem in the future.

I've already had a life to rebuild and find a way to make my own money since I left my job and went no contact with my parents.

 

[Epimanes]

Its only a red flag if you think it is..... its how she occupied her time prior to you.... if you plan on being serious with her... you should feel comfortable expressing your concern gently. You cant control her.. but if it bothers you alot and you dont plan on being serious. Then end it... and let her know why. Dont puzzy foot it..

 

[Romanemp22]

Agree with the man said about the gut feeling. When gut is telling you something is fishy its rarelly wrong, its your inner fight or flight mode basically.

 

[Smok1nAce]

if her life is in chaos outside the game then yes a red flag.

 

[Tilex]

I don't see it as a red flag and that's probably because I've come across many female gamers of all ages in real life.
You would be surprised at how many hot chicks play video games.

I see it as just a game and a form of entertainment.
It's no different than when guys get together and play Battlefield, GTA, or Texas Hold 'em poker.

 

[metalwater]

In the past had online game relationships escalate to real. it happens. the chat in games is chat.

 

[Blacksheep]

Its only a red flag if you think it is..... its how she occupied her time prior to you.... if you plan on being serious with her... you should feel comfortable expressing your concern gently. You cant control her.. but if it bothers you alot and you dont plan on being serious. Then end it... and let her know why. Dont puzzy foot it..

That makes sense!

Thanks for your feedback!

 

[Blacksheep]

Agree with the man said about the gut feeling. When gut is telling you something is fishy its rarelly wrong, its your inner fight or flight mode basically.

That's true!

Went through that a lot of times, and most times I went against it, I found out the truth later.

 

[Blacksheep]

I don't see it as a red flag and that's probably because I've come across many female gamers of all ages in real life.
You would be surprised at how many hot chicks play video games.

I see it as just a game and a form of entertainment.
It's no different than when guys get together and play Battlefield, GTA, or Texas Hold 'em poker.

Good point man! Thanks!

 

[Blacksheep]

In the past had online game relationships escalate to real. it happens. the chat in games is chat.

True! I had a case where one of my first dates and passions when I was 16yrs I guess cheated me with a guy he met on a travel with her family, and they used to play Ragnarok with me.

The case was: she told that she was really sick and was going to sleep. After a few minutes I saw her coming back online in the game. She didn't know about that.

I went on that city that she was and saw on the chat her talking with this guy and telling how much she loves him. After she saws me there she loged out, called me on MSN and told me that she loved me so much.

I broke up after that and a few months this guy came from another state to my town to meet her. They dated for a year I guess.

Also that guy played with me and her everyday and he had the courage to say: "I really didn't know you were together man, I'm so sorry." hahaha

Maybe this is the reason I didn't trust so much on those things.

After that I got on gym, got really good looking and was hooking any girl I wanted.

One more story: there was one girl on her birthday, we went out with her friends (3 male guys) on a bar. She turned her chair back to me and talked with those guys the whole night... After that, she hold the hands of one of those guys and go pay the bill.

I was so stupid that time, I go after her and offer to pay the bill as that was her birthday. After that, she told me I could leave cause she was going to another bar with those guys. Damn, it seems unreal... but I really happened to me. I cried all the night drinking beers and listening to sad songs! haha

And it was only the first stories... had some fcking weird cases with my past relationships.

 

[Romanemp22]

That's true!

Went through that a lot of times, and most times I went against it, I found out the truth later.

Yea you probably followed your heart, it happens but your gut is the rational one

 

[ThisIsSparta]

I knew a couple, lived together for 5 years. She was adicted to World of Warcraft and at one point she ended the relationship to be with a guy she played WOW with.

If a woman spends hours of spare time a day talking to other men.... for every gamer-woman there are 50 nerds online looking for their chance to finaly get a chance on a real woman.

As she puts herself in this environment of needy men, id ask her what she gets out of games like these.

And then i would ask her if it was ok for her if you too spiced your spare time up with other girls, going to the movies, concerts, mini-golf... whatever.

 

[metalwater]

I knew a couple, lived together for 5 years. She was adicted to World of Warcraft and at one point she ended the relationship to be with a guy she played WOW with.

If a woman spends hours of spare time a day talking to other men.... for every gamer-woman there are 50 nerds online looking for their chance to finaly get a chance on a real woman.

As she puts herself in this environment of needy men, id ask her what she gets out of games like these.

And then i would ask her if it was ok for her if you too spiced your spare time up with other girls, going to the movies, concerts, mini-golf... whatever.

ANYTHING that involves consistent chatting up online, phone, or in person. If she is communicating over and over with the same guy(s) they will get a connection. There are exceptions, but don't worry about those because chances are you will never see one. She needs to chat with you and other women and her family. Not other guys regardless of if they know you are not. The women should be of good character and also in a relationship or a grandmother type. Girls will always lie about this situation to make us think it is ok. It is not ok unless you want to live in her frame and share.

In the US we have a joke about the milkman. used to be that everyone got milk delivered from some guy that drives around in a small truck and delivers every day, middle or mid-morning. this was the before the time when guys went to work in the morning, and women stayed home and took care of the home; and chatted every day with the milkman. lota babies looked like the milkman.

video games are NO different.

 

[Blacksheep]

I knew a couple, lived together for 5 years. She was adicted to World of Warcraft and at one point she ended the relationship to be with a guy she played WOW with.

If a woman spends hours of spare time a day talking to other men.... for every gamer-woman there are 50 nerds online looking for their chance to finaly get a chance on a real woman.

As she puts herself in this environment of needy men, id ask her what she gets out of games like these.

And then i would ask her if it was ok for her if you too spiced your spare time up with other girls, going to the movies, concerts, mini-golf... whatever.

She just told me that she did that because she feels alone when I'm not talking with her and she felt the need to talk with other people ("guys") on that game. But she promised that there was no sexual chat or no emotion involved haha.

And if I commit with her, she will delete that. OR, until I didn't fulfill her need for attention and then she got back to that because you know... If a man is busy working on your job, purpose... Women will feel abandoned and then, look for other male attention. But I don't think it's only attention... I think it's only women nature, just as we as men have our nature.