Should you ever compliment a girl on her looks?

[Spaz]

I am serious with this question.... I always have it in my head that when you compliment a girl's appearance you were lowering your value and also basically giving her power by telegraphing too much interest.

I guess this question is more towards the early dating phase.... If you go on a first date or meet with a girl should you ever compliment her appearance?

I never do but I wonder if it could ever be advantageous?

It depends, I could smack on some girls tight azz, give her an appreciative smirk and then compliment her on it's tight-ness or I could compliment another girl on how her makeover made my day so much brighter.

It all depends on my mood.

 

[Reyaj]

All women are insecure, some more than others. You should compliment a woman's looks if she is worthy of a compliment and if she has earned it by her actions towards you.

If you do think she's pretty, and you think it would help address some insecurity that she has shown, and you do want to help her be a better match for you. Then yes you should say it.

Never say it as part of game, never say it as part of a throwaway line. Telling a woman she's pretty to earn her favor does not work, you just feed her ego and diminish your own value

Edit: I think that in general, deeply insecure people usually don't believe it when they're told they are attractive, even if they are. This is why using it as a pickup line is doomed to failure, it comes across as patronizing.

You know what.. this is what I always thought... if a woman is insecure about her looks you can feign your physical desire for her and it would work. I haven't found this to be the case... usually if girls are insecure about their looks nothing you say will let them believe otherwise.

I totally forgot but there is actually an area I do compliment a woman's looks as a opener and it does work...... ONLINE DATING.

This is mainly because your initial dialogue online doesn't matter as girls only care if they are attracted to your photos or not.

 

[EnTL]

only compliment her actual beauty well into the relationship after 6 or 7 dates. but you can compliment girls indirectly and even add a touch of goofiness to it or just plain stupidity but as long as it's genuine. EX: i once was ordering coffee at the shop. big tits, big ass. big eyes. bubbly blonde i say

"i like your shirt it makes you look like you work on a ship"
she giggled and i could see she was longing for me to ask her out later on in the day she had that look like so 'are you gonna ask me out" whilst tilting her head and looking at me. of course at the time i was traveling and living in my car so I didn't exactly know what to do i was just getting my reps in finding out what works.

 

[SgtSplacker]

It's my understanding you compliment less attractive girls and never compliment pretty girls.

 

[RickTheToad]

A little positive reenforcement once in a while can help, but I rarely use it on their attractiveness. No need to feed the their ego monster. Usually save it for their other attributes.

 

[Reyaj]

Yeah I think it shouldn't be used as in person pick up line and used sparingly with girls you are seeing.

 

[Reyaj]

I'm wondering if complimenting a woman's looks could work if you are in a profession where you might be seen as a good judge of it..

For example a model photographer? Thoughts?

 

[Georgepithyou]

After I watched some Alpha male strategies videos i realised compliments only serve to validate women. I have always hates the london daygame opener it juat sounds so beta

 

[In2theGame]

Definitely good but its what you say, how you say it and when.

 

[Lynx nkaf]

No. Never. Always compliment something else other than looks. "Nice lipstick colour"
not
"nice mouth" etc.

 

[Billtx49]

No. Never. Always compliment something else other than looks. "Nice lipstick colour"
not
"nice mouth" etc.

Yes, exactly. Nice earrings, purse, shoes, skirt, jeans, or dress etc, never physical appearance …

 

[NSX-R]

I always thought the only compliment worth to mention is their hair . Never comment bad a woman’s hairstyle. Other than that making compliments is waste of time and i believe a way to lower your value in her eyes

 

[Jack12345]

I would compliment a girl only after sex and if there is a real reason to do this. It feels more natural.

Like last week I dated a girl with a hair that i really liked. If I would compliment her before the sex I would kill the tension and the sex would not happen

This are different times and compliments may seem fake because people has fake personalities

Only if a girl is hard into u, u can compliment her if it feels like it. And u should also do it in a really certain way, u feel it u know when it's right

 

[GoodOne123]

Most of the time the answer is no.

I've learnt this the hard way. The more you show her you are enamoured by her looks the more she sees you as a chump.

 

[Reyaj]

Yes of course. This is why these rules are kind of silly. They're meant for guys unplugging. A lot of guys on this thread are high value men, so they shouldn't be afraid to dispense with a compliment when it's coming from a place of high value.

Obviously a photographer, if he's high value and knows it, will throw out a compliment or two because 1) he's directing the photoshoot and he can (status), 2) he needs his subject to relax and feel good about herself, so it's in his interest, and 3) (optional) because he means it.

He's not complimenting her because he hopes it will get into her pants. And really most professionals probably want to avoid this kind of reputation, but that's another thread.

And as others mentioned it's how you say it. If he says "Gosh you're pretty" like a chump it will be worthless. But if he says "that green dress is really going to bring out those eyes in this photo," or "you're going to break a lot of hearts on Instagram next week," well, I think you can see the difference in effect.

Rules of discretion and restraint are great for guys starting out. If you're successful and high value, you can toss out the rulebook as long as you remember the fundamentals. A compliment from YOU at the right time and place is worth 1,000 "likes" or chump compliments.

I definitely agree for the most part here. I don't think I was very clear with my photographer question though, I was thinking more of someone who is trying to procure a woman they aren't necessarily working with. In essence if a known model photographer compliments a girl who knows what he does for a living, does that actually stimulate any attraction in her? Like if an average joe said she probably would shake it off as just another AFC and not have it affect her in any way.... but if someone who is seen as having a good eye for women says it, could it be attractive?

I remember I used to talk to this Portuguese girl a long time ago... She had lost her virginity to a Brazilian guy a little before we started talking. She said she always wanted to be with a Brazilian guy because they are known to go for the most beautiful women. I think this all stems from the pre-selection strategy which most agree works albeit difficult to manufacture.

ps - still could use that video software suggestion per my pm

 

[Doppelganger]

say it if you really feel it and not just to impress her.

 

[Roober]

This is my approach...

1. A woman is "sexy" not "cute" or "beautiful"
2 I complement things she does for me, showing gratitude
3. If she's feeling insecure, I fvck her

 

[2Rocky]

There is a difference between "not fawning over a woman" and "relationship maintenance"
If she gets her hair done you better notice and say something.
Nothing wrong with telling her she looks good when she dresses up for a date.
If she spends time in the gym doing squats, tell her the skirt or dress really shows off her booty/legs
basically you compliment the action of her dressing up,working out, doing her hair....it is a positive reinforcement. The same is true for thanking her for doing nice things for you...

 

[Who Dares Win]

I dont for many reasons, the only exception is something that she worked for it like her body shape at the gym or after a bloody diet.

Im not complimenting but recognizing the value of her effort.

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

It depends entirely on the cirumstances. In text/social media/dating apps, i'd say no. If it's nightgame, I'd also generally say no for the same reasons: most guys hitting on them are probably saying the same **** as you. If it's daygame, however, I'd say yes, because it takes balls to do that **** in the middle of the day and they're not expecting it.

There is no rule of thumb, though. I'd strongly avoid using top shelf compliments such as beautiful, gorgeous, etc (unless they truly are, a 9/10 dressed super feminine and elegant in a grocery store for instance, would warrant such strong adjectives).

Generally though, I think it's best to make specific compliments over something generic. Maybe say their winged eyeliner looks good, or say the color of their dress looks good on them, or whatever. Or maybe spin it into a half compliment and say that dress looks good on them but the color seems off. If you are ballsy you could take the late Patrice O'Neal approach and open with something like "look at you in those shorts!" with an objectifying tone, but that probably takes a very precise mix of tenderness and aggressiveness.