Scheduled date... In the day, she just find a excuse (Fourth time that happened)

[Blacksheep]

So, I've been meeting some women after I broke up... But I'm doing something wrong.

We start talking, mainly on instagram... Had a connection, I see that she was emotionally/desire up to me. So when I feel that rapport I invite her for a date. In that time she is sending heart emojis, etc...

But on the fcking day... She find a excuse and get off the date. It's like the fourth time in a roll.

On the date day I always try to confirm or indirectly ask something about what she likes to eat/drink and that I'm planning something for eating, etc.

When she got a excuse I just stop talking and move on (don't even reply or say anything, cause idk... Don't like to waste my time with that game). It's annoying. But it seems most of girls are acting just like that... It's like, "You're a option today, but tomorrow I found a better one, then I will just discard you and fck this other guy..."

Should you have to be 100% perfect in all aspects on instagram to date women there?

Those are my main photos:



Sometimes I think it's because that stuffs like (not having travelling pictures, expensive boat and places, etc.).

That is my main way to meet woman, as it always worked for me before my LTR of 2019. But now it seems that I'm out of the game, doing something wrong.

Do not spend whole day using that, mainly working on my projects until late night, but I take some time to search for some plates and talk to women.

Should I change my game or something?

 

[Who Dares Win]

I believe that your pictures are ok except that you look like a nice guy trying to impress women, then its always you alone mostly selfies.

Women read through lines, they check us as nazis when it comes of size and shape but still its not enough to them.+

Regarding her flaking for the fourth time, I suggest you to review the 2 strikes rule (I suggest you the 1 strike rule in 2020).

I would throw away pic nr1, pic nr2 and 9 btw, I would also review the others.

 

[AttackFormation]

I believe that your pictures are ok except that you look like a nice guy trying to impress women

If women were turned off by tattoos, instead of turned on by them, no man would get them. But I bet if you asked 100 tattooed guys if women determined why they got tattoos, 97% of them would say "LOL! of course not bro".

Steroids, tattoos and aping "alpha" behavior like you see on this forum from the guys on my ignore list are for men similar to what foundation, eye liner, eye shadow, mascara, highlighter, concealer, fake hair, fake eyelashes, blush, lip gloss, filters, retouches, angles, poses, lighting, narcissistic validation seeking and bytch pack behavior are for women. Both are "costumes" that people put on to dress up in who they want themselves and others to see them as, symptomatic of narcissism.

I think of the letters that swedish soldiers from 320 years ago wrote in the Great Northern War, who neither they nor their women had any of those things. They typically say something like: they have faith in god whatever happens and they hope to see their wife and children again, or they wish them to be taken care of, or they think about them constantly and pray to god they are safe. These men had nothing of the caricatures of masculinity we worship today - "harems" of women, fitness model steroids, tough guy tattoos, chest beating behavior - but if I asked you who is more secure as a man, who do you say?

Thousands of years of misery, hope and "progress" - only to reach the animal nature we started at, debating how to best ape an alpha male on instagram to hope to get our d1ck wet. But that's what we are, there is no magic.

 

[Lookatu]

Well Instasham is mainly gals wanting validation/ego boost and showing off more than anything else. Dating is further down the list for them on that platform I find. Given that girls flake a lot on regular dating apps, it's no surprise they would even flake more on this platform that isn't directly meant for dating.

I wouldn't worry too much man and try IRL more, but due to lockdown, maybe other forms of OLD may fair better during these times for you, especially considering you are in Brazil. There's been so many big spikes of coronavirus down there lately that not too many gals are gonna be down to meeting anyone anytime soon unless you are a 9-10 model or can demonstrate wealth online. My $.02

 

[thinker]

Like others have said you need some pictures with people otherwise you look like a weird loner dude. You also need more outdoor and action pictures so they see that you have a fun life , it doesn't have to be anything crazy like you on a yacht but pretty much all of your pictures are you alone indoors. One last thing make the pictures look like it wasn't planed like you were hanging out with friends doing fun things and one of them took a picture of you.

 

[Blacksheep]

I believe that your pictures are ok except that you look like a nice guy trying to impress women, then its always you alone mostly selfies.

Women read through lines, they check us as nazis when it comes of size and shape but still its not enough to them.+

Regarding her flaking for the fourth time, I suggest you to review the 2 strikes rule (I suggest you the 1 strike rule in 2020).

I would throw away pic nr1, pic nr2 and 9 btw, I would also review the others.

Thanks man! That makes sense.

Actually idk if I explain ok, it's 4 different girls... Just invite... if they gave excuse, move on to another.

And about the photos, gonna delete those and review it. I should try some group photos after that pandemy stuffs goes away. Solo photos are really not a good idea.

 

[Blacksheep]

If women were turned off by tattoos, instead of turned on by them, no man would get them. But I bet if you asked 100 tattooed guys if women determined why they got tattoos, 97% of them would say "LOL! of course not bro".

Steroids, tattoos and aping "alpha" behavior like you see on this forum from the guys on my ignore list are for men similar to what foundation, eye liner, eye shadow, mascara, highlighter, concealer, fake hair, fake eyelashes, blush, lip gloss, filters, retouches, angles, poses, lighting, narcissistic validation seeking and bytch pack behavior are for women. Both are "costumes" that people put on to dress up in who they want themselves and others to see them as, symptomatic of narcissism.

I think of the letters that swedish soldiers from 320 years ago wrote in the Great Northern War, who neither they nor their women had any of those things. They typically say something like: they have faith in god whatever happens and they hope to see their wife and children again, or they wish them to be taken care of, or they think about them constantly and pray to god they are safe. These men had nothing of the caricatures of masculinity we worship today - "harems" of women, fitness model steroids, tough guy tattoos, chest beating behavior - but if I asked you who is more secure as a man, who do you say?

Thousands of years of misery, hope and "progress" - only to reach the animal nature we started at, debating how to best ape an alpha male on instagram to hope to get our d1ck wet. But that's what we are, there is no magic.

That make sense! Interesting observation.

I try to transcend that need for sex, I understand there is way more important and valuable things to pursue in life. But sometimes I get caught myself with that animal desire... looking for a woman to copulate with.

Gonna meditate about that!

 

[Blacksheep]

Might help to have group photos of you doing fun stuff, with other young, attractive people(if you're relying on the photos for appeal). Solo pics make you(anyone) look lonely, and that's not a good look.

That's true man.

Had a long period of depression and I kind isolated myself. Now that I'm recovering from all those things that happened those years.

I'm breathing again and out of that cage. Gonna start having some good moments and then register that on pictures.

Before that I had better pictures with friends, playing at parties as dj... That may explain why I'm having this negative experience now... Just closed myself for a long time.

 

[Blacksheep]

Well Instasham is mainly gals wanting validation/ego boost and showing off more than anything else. Dating is further down the list for them on that platform I find. Given that girls flake a lot on regular dating apps, it's no surprise they would even flake more on this platform that isn't directly meant for dating.

I wouldn't worry too much man and try IRL more, but due to lockdown, maybe other forms of OLD may fair better during these times for you, especially considering you are in Brazil. There's been so many big spikes of coronavirus down there lately that not too many gals are gonna be down to meeting anyone anytime soon unless you are a 9-10 model or can demonstrate wealth online. My $.02

Thanks for your feedback man! That's true!

I can clearly see those girls needs for validation and that digital influencers fame haha. I should've been focusing more on interesting stuffs.

Sorry for the question, but what is IRL and OLD? Don't know those concepts.

 

[Blacksheep]

Like others have said you need some pictures with people otherwise you look like a weird loner dude. You also need more outdoor and action pictures so they see that you have a fun life , it doesn't have to be anything crazy like you on a yacht but pretty much all of your pictures are you alone indoors. One last thing make the pictures look like it wasn't planed like you were hanging out with friends doing fun things and one of them took a picture of you.

Good tip man!! Thanks!

I started to notice that haha... that's really weird. Never stopped to observe that... It's like I'm the most lonely guy on the world on my instagram photos.

And damn... this is true! I closed myself for a long period of time with depression and other problems. Now I just getting back to normal again and slowly I think things will come back to normal.

 

[thinker]

@Blacksheep IRL means "in real life" and OLD means "online dating". You should focus more on real life, OLD from what I have gathered is a shiit show, I only do real life and its worked well for me.

 

[Alvafe]

I will toss my take on photos online, is only worthy you have then IF someone else put then and you was marked on then, you shouldn't put this much photos on himself, let someone else do it, if you like take pictures, take some from places, moon, horizons, nice sunsets, don't focus on you, but if you don't drop the selfies.

also, follow this little guide

 

[AttackFormation]

That make sense! Interesting observation.

I try to transcend that need for sex, I understand there is way more important and valuable things to pursue in life. But sometimes I get caught myself with that animal desire... looking for a woman to copulate with.

Gonna meditate about that!

There's nothing wrong with wanting sex, I just think it's a bit tragicomic from a macro perspective that beneath all of our technical progress and social marketing & organization we are just the same animals as before and as any other animal - human nature doesn't change. But, one must be at peace with it, it's even worse to be sanctimonious and contemptuous of inescapable facts. This is just what we are. There is only the meaning you want there to be and are able to create.

Look back over the epic struggles and developments of history, and then look at us here ending up trying to get our d1cks wet just like a baboon pack or our ape ancestors, because in the end that is what we are and there is no fairy tale magic. It just makes me think of this guy, you know? : https://giphy.com/gifs/xIA1GV4jlgozS/html5

Anyway I won't take up more of your thread, it was just a philosophical musing. By the way, IRL = In Real Life and OLD= Online Dating. You sound like you're the kind of guy who will make good progress from an advice thread like this. I remember you said those professional pics you got made a big difference before.

 

[Lookatu]

Sorry for the question, but what is IRL and OLD? Don't know those concepts.

Yes if you are in Brazil or anywhere in Southern Americas, IRL(in real life) seems to work so much better than the US.
Last time I was in Colombia and Mexico, it literally reminded me of the ways and the crap we could get away with trying to pickup gals IRL like I used to do in the 80's. It was soooo liberating not having a woman be offended, or look at you weird, or call the cops on you with a #metoo lawsuit attached with it.
You don't know how lucky you have it down there when it comes to that aspect.

 

[AttackFormation]

I will toss my take on photos online, is only worthy you have then IF someone else put then and you was marked on then, you shouldn't put this much photos on himself, let someone else do it, if you like take pictures, take some from places, moon, horizons, nice sunsets, don't focus on you, but if you don't drop the selfies.

also, follow this little guide

Pretty much. Photos have different rules for men and women, just like the rest of social behavior. Selfies are fine for women to use, but men need to look more like they are a celebrity - other people following them around and taking their pictures instead of themselves, in "cool" or high status settings, with very good photo quality, with other people around who make you look popular while it's still clear who you are in the pics.

 

[Who Dares Win]

Thanks man! That makes sense.

Actually idk if I explain ok, it's 4 different girls... Just invite... if they gave excuse, move on to another.

And about the photos, gonna delete those and review it. I should try some group photos after that pandemy stuffs goes away. Solo photos are really not a good idea.

I would advice you (altough its not my field) the following pictures.

1 your face, it has to be visible so no half faces or funny filters, also no beta mimic since you're not asking for approval or apologizing for anything.

2)your body but without showing that you trying to impress (naked chest at the beach rather than selfie at the gym)

3)social life picture, has to look like a group of guys with decent attires in a decent place

4)something about your hobbies, those dj ones are fine but better yet would be a third person one from behind your back so girls can see both u and the crowd.

Better to look c0cky than beta trust me on that, better overdo with pride than with humbleness....girls dont think as we do.

 

[Blacksheep]

UPDATE: LOL this last fourth girl, when I ignored her, she called me at 5 pm today and told me that she wanted to come to my place. Got her at 7pm... She is sleeping right now on my bed.

It seems that, not answering her excuse worked. I just liked her answer and did not send anything else. Really weird that haha.

That's fcking crazy.

 

[Blacksheep]

@Blacksheep IRL means "in real life" and OLD means "online dating". You should focus more on real life, OLD from what I have gathered is a shiit show, I only do real life and its worked well for me.

Thanks man! =)

That's true... The best dates I had was from IRL. Had some good ones on OLD but when you meet someone in real life is a way more genuine.

 

[Blacksheep]

I will toss my take on photos online, is only worthy you have then IF someone else put then and you was marked on then, you shouldn't put this much photos on himself, let someone else do it, if you like take pictures, take some from places, moon, horizons, nice sunsets, don't focus on you, but if you don't drop the selfies.

also, follow this little guide

That picture is aweoms lol hahaha

That's true man! Have to change that imediately.

Kind of lonely nerd guy taking out some selfies!!

 

[Blacksheep]

There's nothing wrong with wanting sex, I just think it's a bit tragicomic from a macro perspective that beneath all of our technical progress and social marketing & organization we are just the same animals as before and as any other animal - human nature doesn't change. But, one must be at peace with it, it's even worse to be sanctimonious and contemptuous of inescapable facts. This is just what we are. There is only the meaning you want there to be and are able to create.

Look back over the epic struggles and developments of history, and then look at us here ending up trying to get our d1cks wet just like a baboon pack or our ape ancestors, because in the end that is what we are and there is no fairy tale magic. It just makes me think of this guy, you know? : https://giphy.com/gifs/xIA1GV4jlgozS/html5

Anyway I won't take up more of your thread, it was just a philosophical musing. By the way, IRL = In Real Life and OLD= Online Dating. You sound like you're the kind of guy who will make good progress from an advice thread like this. I remember you said those professional pics you got made a big difference before.

That image is not strange... who is this vengeance guy?

btw, I like those philosophical ideas... it's great to take a time to think about it! =)