The Most Important Thread I'll ever write

[Reyaj]

I have been meaning to do this for a while as you can see from this thread that explains the background - https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threa...-about-women-through-real-experiences.232394/

I need to put everything I've learned through my experiences down and documented with theories. As I said I am really doing this for myself but would love to have positive interactions from others. Whether you agree or disagree as long as you challenge what I write respectively I promise I will be open minded.

I'm going to start with referencing my approach journal as I believe that was the most impact and transforming activity I've done. From there I'll go by both additional threads and my memory as I certainly had a life before and after it. What is interesting is that I initially wanted to have as complete an understanding of female behavior as possible but its also led me to develop a personal philosophy which is in the process of being shaped. Having a philosophy that works will ironically end up being more important to my life and well being.

One last note on the theories I will lay out below; As I like to keep a low profile with my internet persona the names of the women I'll use to support my theories at times will be ambiguous. I of course will know who they refer to.

Theory 1 - Strike while the Iron is Hot.

So many times I've held myself back from escalating as much as I could when I had physical intimacy with women. All too often I never got any further with them after not capitalizing on it. I've had beliefs that being too sexual advancing too soon would turn them off and by holding back I'd put myself in a better position down the road.

Examples - Sharon Moscato | Glasses Interior Design Pot Smoker | Polish Girl from advanced degree studies | Ecuadorian girl who had a boyfriend when I met her, Bloomberg who I # closed in a club after kinoing only to be a completely unpleasant when we met and called out my kino negatively | Jennifer 18 year old I made out with and felt up in a club when I was 25| Melanie 22 year old I made out with in bar which meeting up again was delayed and never got opportunity to, Irish girl Erin who I was just too young and too much of a pvssy to start making out with as I had the car isolation. We had kissed on our date before | Sicilian girl Anna who's IL was high in me from months of conversation but I didn't go for the kiss when I had isolation in her car. I never heard from her again. | Sicilian girl Francesca who I apprehensively went to kiss then got shy and it was awkward as hell. She lost interest in me afterwards | Harry Potter where Harry is really a girl's name. We kissed kind of awkwardly on our first date but she was still being semi responsive but I delayed our next date and never got another opportunity. | Ashlynne I number closed her in a bar when I should have just went for a make out. We had a date for brunch which went nowhere and I never heard from her again. | Train Pickup Nicole I got her number on the train when she was pretty drunk and I'm sure I was to. Maybe I should have went for a makeout on the train as when we met for drinks one night after nothing came of it and she ghosted. | Tarrah, I had her out twice and made out with her good both times when she dropped me off in my parking lot. She was so into the making out she even turned her car off. I should have asked her to come up to my place. I never got any further with her than these two moments. | Italian girl Kristin V. I held back from making out with her when I had car isolation.. I later found out me being too nice turned her off | Sicilian girl Ann Marie pretty much the same exact story as Kristin V. | Lavinia Romanian after lots of sporadic talking I had a chance to meet her and deferred. I never got another chance. | Juliana I had a chance to meet her several times as she was into me but for some reason I didn't feel it was worth it as she lived far. She ended up in a relationship not long after with someone else. Now that I look at her pics I should have probably met her. | Cleidane same story as Juliana. |

 

[Visionist]

That's quite the collection of regrets. Makes mine look modest and I thought mine was large.

The important thing is you've learned now. I still pass up opportunities and regret it later. What's holding me back? Is it lack of confidence because I know I'm currently fat and expect rejection? But even when I wasn't fat I would hold myself back...

 

[Reyaj]

That's quite the collection of regrets. Makes mine look modest and I thought mine was large.

The important thing is you've learned now. I still pass up opportunities and regret it later. What's holding me back? Is it lack of confidence because I know I'm currently fat and expect rejection? But even when I wasn't fat I would hold myself back...

I really don't see them as regrets for I was naive at the time. Honestly I still may very well be but I'm hoping by writing this out I can form some solid understandings and conclusions about this game we all play.

It sounds like you probably are afraid of rejection whether you want to admit it yourself or not. You can be in peak physical condition and still get rejected. The key is not seeing it as "rejection", you should just see it as low interest and learn what you can.

 

[Reyaj]

Theory 2 - Women will make considerable effort to meet a man they deem as high quality, particularly older women.

Example - Angela G, she traveled an hour via train into the city and waited patiently. I ended up ditching her but thats besides the point lol. She liked my photo and thought I was affluent. | Sicilian bvitch from pizzeria who mixed me up | Pre Med Whitney | Deep throat girl with stretch marks |

Theory 3 - Insulting or standing up a woman is better than being nice with her having low interest level. (Once you ditch a woman she will be reluctant to ever meet up with you again. However there still may be a chance as you dissing her is better than having her flake on you due to low interest.)

Example - Angela G, was mad but still talked to me a bit after and seemed ambivalent to meeting again | Romanian Milf who I stood up so many times. | Deep throat stretch mark girl who I blew off plenty of times but still gave me chances. | California South American who was fat with a cute face. I pretty much seemed uninterested and blew her off a bit too but she still was on my junk for a while. | Lexi pretty much same as California girl. | Hot girl Stephanie who gave me STD scare | Arab girl from college | South American girl from Florida I met online end of college era |

 

[Reyaj]

Theory 3 - You can get a girl's number with only a little bit of talking and a false time constraint.

Example - My approach journal and countless others like Kaitlin who I picked up outside in a beach town as I was walking to my car

Theory 4 - You can open a girl with almost anything as long as your confident

Example - My approach journal and countless others

Theory 5 - You have little to nothing to lose going for a phone number even if you aren't sure. You miss 100% of the shots you don't take

Example - My approach journal and countless others

Theory 6 - Asking questions via text messages is a good way to build rapport

Example - My approach journal and countless others

Theory 7 - Getting a girl on the phone and talking can make you resonate with her

Example - My approach journal and countless others

Theory 8 - If a girl adamantly denies having another drink while on a date her interest in you is low

Example - Blonde Kassie, Rachelle (didn't even have one), Katie Yoga Teacher, hot business partner Emily (although she said she only has 1 drink on a first date as a rule and was kind of lukewarm after so who really knows)

Theory 9 - If you don't kino enough on the first date the girl will lose interest in you.

Example - My approach journal, Kaitlin lawyer, hot russian hr girl, portuguese Vera, Tall Ana portuguese, Argentine Flo, and many others from my past. Tall Casey... So many others

 

[Reyaj]

two girls I reminded of not striking when the iron is hot. Casino Coke girl and 2 teacher friends who gave me their numbers in casino lobby.

 

[BaldandBrazy88]

First and foremost. Thank you. For taking the time big brother. This are all great , I mean GREAT POINTS with wich I can all agree.
Except for #4 building rapport asking questions through text.. mm I've found out , IMO statemenfy are better. Just my opinion
Golden stuff again

 

[Reyaj]

First and foremost. Thank you. For taking the time big brother. This are all great , I mean GREAT POINTS with wich I can all agree.
Except for #4 building rapport asking questions through text.. mm I've found out , IMO statemenfy are better. Just my opinion
Golden stuff again

Thanks! Tell me more about the statements you make via texting that have worked. I just find that generally asking questions forces them to think and share about themselves thus building rapport (or at least as much as you can build via messages). It also helps gauge interest level because of its low they won't respond to your question. If you just make a statement they won't always take it as warranting a response or may not know what to respond with and thus say nothing.

 

[BaldandBrazy88]

Thanks! Tell me more about the statements you make via texting that have worked. I just find that generally asking questions forces them to think and share about themselves thus building rapport (or at least as much as you can build via messages). It also helps gauge interest level because of its low they won't respond to your question. If you just make a statement they won't always take it as warranting a response or may not know what to respond with and thus say nothing.

You re welcome brother. Here's the thing, what's has worked for me is the usage of statements / assumptions that's funny, provocative or flat out "disrespectful" ( the kill her ego first theory) , trust me they will reply to those. Now, to your point, two things, yes you have to make it easy for them to reply, it's a text and let's assume she got a life and things to do ( another reason I don't like to go deep with questions, personal ones, unless of course there's back and forth she's free, etc). Also, you said "it forces them to think" this I take it as you're talking to an over +27 year old with smarts, in that case yes go show off your intelligence too, the way I would do it through a voice message ( get your masculine voice going and show some interest) but still I wouldn't go just by question after question.
Cheers brother, great points again can't believe out of 10 I just differed with one

 

[Reyaj]

You re welcome brother. Here's the thing, what's has worked for me is the usage of statements / assumptions that's funny, provocative or flat out "disrespectful" ( the kill her ego first theory) , trust me they will reply to those. Now, to your point, two things, yes you have to make it easy for them to reply, it's a text and let's assume she got a life and things to do ( another reason I don't like to go deep with questions, personal ones, unless of course there's back and forth she's free, etc). Also, you said "it forces them to think" this I take it as you're talking to an over +27 year old with smarts, in that case yes go show off your intelligence too, the way I would do it through a voice message ( get your masculine voice going and show some interest) but still I wouldn't go just by question after question.
Cheers brother, great points again can't believe out of 10 I just differed with one

I appreciate you responding and interacting on this tread. I know not all my theories will be agreed on and I'm honestly excited to delve into them further when there are other point of views. At the end of the day they really are just "theories" - All positive discussion can do is help improve and understand them.

So regarding your text statements you send, can you provide a few examples? I'm always curious to see specifics on what has worked well for others. Also just to clarify my theory on this I by no means you should over text a woman with questions and respond to her asap on each one. I also believe its important to try and get a meet with her as soon as possible. I just feel that questions in general require more investment on a woman's part while at the same time they can feel good about answering them as we all know women love to talk about themselves.

 

[BaldandBrazy88]

I appreciate you responding and interacting on this tread. I know not all my theories will be agreed on and I'm honestly excited to delve into them further when there are other point of views. At the end of the day they really are just "theories" - All positive discussion can do is help improve and understand them.

So regarding your text statements you send, can you provide a few examples? I'm always curious to see specifics on what has worked well for others. Also just to clarify my theory on this I by no means you should over text a woman with questions and respond to her asap on each one. I also believe its important to try and get a meet with her as soon as possible. I just feel that questions in general require more investment on a woman's part while at the same time they can feel good about answering them as we all know women love to talk about themselves.

Agree, all that texting means nothing if you don't meet with her asap ( nowadays with this covid thing a buddy of mine says is building connection with a girl, I rather use my time on better things). Now, regarding the assumptions, I'll give you one that comes to my mind a recent one
Her: I happened to drop my phone into some water
Me: that's disgusting, dropping the cellphone into the toilet
Her: omg no! Haha, it wasnt the toilet, what happens is ...*proceeds to give me a full explanation of her day and how it happened*
Get the idea? Haha again, very shallow example but thats the point, better than my asking directly how it happened? -"fell into the dishwasher" end of conversation ( or me having to ask a second question, how it happened) . So thats my theory, of course not applicable for serious topics, a girl that has a f**kin attitude towards everything ( I wouldnt talk to this type anywho, some guys like to be treated bad/some beta ishh), if you re not creative enough to come up with something good.

 

[ubercat]

Great thread. Thank you for sharing. Backs up a few things. Like the results of cold approach don't matter. It's a cruicible. I ve always gone for fast physical escalation as it cuts out a lot of tyre kickers and if they re ambivalent I get my profit up front.

Amazing you can remember all the girls names. I guess that's one of the good points of an approach journal. my notches are somewhere around the 50 Mark mainly because I've had so many LTRs and I can't remember all the names.

I m interested in #3 Don't mind a preemptive strike myself. How do you spot likely flake signs?

 

[Visionist]

I told a girl I'd had sex with a couple of times "I don't love you, I just wanna fvck you" when the subject of love came up. She was 17 and a full on carousel rider (she loved Sex & The City of course). She refused to suck me off right after.

She promptly monkey branched to another guy without telling me.

Back then I thought I'd offended her and that was why she stopped seeing me.

lol

She was gonna monkey branch anyway. I got a nice parting shot it without even realising it.

 

[Reyaj]

Agree, all that texting means nothing if you don't meet with her asap ( nowadays with this covid thing a buddy of mine says is building connection with a girl, I rather use my time on better things). Now, regarding the assumptions, I'll give you one that comes to my mind a recent one
Her: I happened to drop my phone into some water
Me: that's disgusting, dropping the cellphone into the toilet
Her: omg no! Haha, it wasnt the toilet, what happens is ...*proceeds to give me a full explanation of her day and how it happened*
Get the idea? Haha again, very shallow example but thats the point, better than my asking directly how it happened? -"fell into the dishwasher" end of conversation ( or me having to ask a second question, how it happened) . So thats my theory, of course not applicable for serious topics, a girl that has a f**kin attitude towards everything ( I wouldnt talk to this type anywho, some guys like to be treated bad/some beta ishh), if you re not creative enough to come up with something good.

I like it! It's like teasing her a little bit. Yes I'm all for that, thanks for sharing. Being playful and lighthearted are good qualities.

Great thread. Thank you for sharing. Backs up a few things. Like the results of cold approach don't matter. It's a cruicible. I ve always gone for fast physical escalation as it cuts out a lot of tyre kickers and if they re ambivalent I get my profit up front.

Amazing you can remember all the girls names. I guess that's one of the good points of an approach journal. my notches are somewhere around the 50 Mark mainly because I've had so many LTRs and I can't remember all the names.

I m interested in #3 Don't mind a preemptive strike myself. How do you spot likely flake signs?

Thanks. Yeah cold approaches can pay off but its a numbers game, a BIG NUMBERS game lol.

Regarding #3 the premise is really that making a girl feel something even if its negative is better than her feeling apathetic towards you. This has been a work in progress though as it certainly can put you into recovery mode. I think a technique can be refined here though.

 

[Reyaj]

Theory 10 - Sitting next to a girl increases your chances of success. Don't sit across from her if you can help it.

Example - There are countless. This simple concept took me a while to learn but once I did I improved tenfold. There are times you can't always have this though if you have to meet at a pace where there's only large tables structured in a way where you have to sit across from each other. But even if you meet for Starbucks let them get their first and just sit on the side of them, not across from them. This is why I like meeting for drinks because usually bars already give you that reason for being adjacent to your date.

Theory 11 - If a girl doesn't respond to a follow up text or two after meeting she is not interested. Just keep that in mind no matter how good you think the date might have went.

Example - My approach journal and countless others

Theory 12 - If a girl sends a follow up text whether its on her own or a reply to yours saying she had a nice time or something similar then you did well and she is interested! This her doing it on her own though without you mentioning it first or asking her (of course you never ask her!)

Example - A lot! Here's a few just coming to mind; First Girl I banged from Approach Journal, Katie B, Nurse Megan, Social Worker with same name as my girl, Stacy who was adopted by Italians who I made out with twice, Julianne who I wasn't into, Smelly vag girl, Sharon who's lips and tvits tasted amazing, Deep Throat Nurse girl, Irish Hockey Fan Erin, UK Hairy Armed girl, Tarrah, Irish Short Erin etc...

 

[NSX-R]

I want your opinion on gut feeling. Whenever my gut was telling me that a woman wasn’t interested or the opposite, it always came right .

 

[Visionist]

Gut feeling has screwed me over multiple times. I could have sworn they were into me. Completely the opposite.

I've learned to distrust my instincts, be suspicious of them. This isn't a good thing.

 

[NSX-R]

Gut feeling has screwed me over multiple times. I could have sworn they were into me. Completely the opposite.

I've learned to distrust my instincts, be suspicious of them. This isn't a good thing.

Very interesting. Perhaps it has to do with the amount of interactions you’ve had . I believe for a non social person his gut feeling might not always be true but i believe it’s the opposite for me . But some times even though i know a female is attracted to me and I’m attracted to her, my gut feeling is keeping me away for some reason that i can’t explain. It happened once when i was drunk many years ago , i was picking up that woman and even though i knew that she wanted me to make a move , my gut feeling was telling me To stand back .
When i got sober , and saw her again she was bellow average and not so attractive as i thought she was . Maybe is just some way of my inner self telling me i should back away for some reason and that reason might be because she either a bad person or that she’s a high mileage puss or whatever. Well I’m not looking to get married so that wouldn’t be a problem otherwise but maybe it has to do more about your inner game and about the standards your inner self has set for you .

 

[Reyaj]

I want your opinion on gut feeling. Whenever my gut was telling me that a woman wasn’t interested or the opposite, it always came right .

Lol I can relate because I feel the same way often. Regardless its just a numbers game at the end of the day, you should always "assume the sale". The ones that seem interested go for it, the ones that don't, go for it. At the end of the day there is little to nothing to lose.

Gut feeling has screwed me over multiple times. I could have sworn they were into me. Completely the opposite.

I've learned to distrust my instincts, be suspicious of them. This isn't a good thing.

You need to just temper your expectations. Its hard because naturally you want to feel happy/exited when you had a good outing with a girl. More often than not though it may not amount to anything. As I start posting more in this thread a lot of the realities I found about women will be revealed. They all seem to do what's known as the common "shvit test" and I have to be honest right back and say I haven't yet found a proven way to beat this. Bascially even if a girl is into you as a defense mechanism she will try to backwards rationalize why you wouldn't be good for her. This in and of itself is one of the most difficult aspects of this game.

Very interesting. Perhaps it has to do with the amount of interactions you’ve had . I believe for a non social person his gut feeling might not always be true but i believe it’s the opposite for me . But some times even though i know a female is attracted to me and I’m attracted to her, my gut feeling is keeping me away for some reason that i can’t explain. It happened once when i was drunk many years ago , i was picking up that woman and even though i knew that she wanted me to make a move , my gut feeling was telling me To stand back .
When i got sober , and saw her again she was bellow average and not so attractive as i thought she was . Maybe is just some way of my inner self telling me i should back away for some reason and that reason might be because she either a bad person or that she’s a high mileage puss or whatever. Well I’m not looking to get married so that wouldn’t be a problem otherwise but maybe it has to do more about your inner game and about the standards your inner self has set for you .

ah this is a little different than what I understood you meant above. I have felt the same as well, sometimes I was glad I didn't do it, other times I regretted it. But as I age I am just more picky and don't need to chase something that doesn't get me really excited to bang.

 

[Reyaj]

Theory 13 - If a girl has High Interest Level she will make it easy to meet up.
Example - Countless... Let's just say almost every girl I ever banged or who has given me head. This is really similar to Theory 2 the difference being you don't have to be wealthy, popular etc... If something about you gets her interest level spiked

Theory 14 - If a girl is a chronic weed smoker and you smoke up with her it will not make her want to jump your bones if she is not attracted to you.

Examples - Sicilian Pizza Girl. I am not a pot smoker so sorry if this sounds naive. I figured if you smoked with a girl it might be easier to hook up. Right now I don't believe that is true but I do have a small sample pool here.