I broke up a 2 year old relationship

[rayv12]

I broke up with my ltr a week ago when my friend saw her at some bar with a guy she works with. She was ignoring my calls and acting weird for weeks.
A year ago she was all over me, now I am going through some health issues, gained weight(>10kg) and a new job where I work (>11hrs).

I saw the relationship going down the drain and broke up stating I don't wish her to see anymore as I felt disrespected by her behaviour and she should be more open about things rather than lie and party with some dude.

She is still partying with a new guy who is all over her Instagram. I felt terrible last night got drunk broke NC after a week and ended up answering her call asking(crying) why she did this to me, she said she just wanted to enjoy a bit and she still loves me.

I am a bit lost at the moment after 2 years when I thought she is the one, and things are getting serious she starts going out with some dude over me.
Is Love even a thing?

 

[Doggie]

Hypergamy at its best. Move on chief. The lady is long gone, she is already having back breaking sex with the guy.

 

[bcude]

Hey man, i feel your pain and it sucks big time.
In your age girls go for the brightest shining diamond, and from the sound of it you went from a cool dude she felt attracted to originally, to absent and un-attractive.
Why do i say un-attractive? When you let your body go like that you communicate lack of self respect which is not good and you breaking NC by calling and crying is a really weak beta male behavior that will turn her off. I know you have emotions like a healthy human, but the feminine traits are not going to get her attracted to you.
You need to focus on yourself and take leadership of your own life, not making her the priority of your life which is clear by your wording. That's the path, so take responsibility for your part and do it better for the future.

There is no "one", only better or worse women.

 

[Focal core]

I broke up with my ltr a week ago when my friend saw her at some bar with a guy she works with. She was ignoring my calls and acting weird for weeks.
A year ago she was all over me, now I am going through some health issues, gained weight(>10kg) and a new job where I work (>11hrs).

I saw the relationship going down the drain and broke up stating I don't wish her to see anymore as I felt disrespected by her behaviour and she should be more open about things rather than lie and party with some dude.

She is still partying with a new guy who is all over her Instagram. I felt terrible last night got drunk broke NC after a week and ended up answering her call asking(crying) why she did this to me, she said she just wanted to enjoy a bit and she still loves me.

I am a bit lost at the moment after 2 years when I thought she is the one, and things are getting serious she starts going out with some dude over me.
Is Love even a thing?

That thing (your gf) wasn't worth anything, I would trade her for an old shoes. Yup she broke your heart, mourning over your relationship and move on is always the best route to go, treat yourself right, go having lucrative thing that you always wanted that you couldn't afford when you're with her, for me having time on my own is always a luxury.

 

[Epic Days]

“she said she just wanted to enjoy a bit and she still loves me.”

She’s most likely telling you the truth right here. So it’s best to define a woman’s love. I’m not going to beat you up.

First off, she has absolutely no control over how she feels. It is a mental health point for a woman to act on her sexual drives and breeding strategy.

it is impossible for a woman to desire a man, long term, on a protracted level. Her biology doesn’t work that way. Unless you interact with her on a once a week level. This will prolong her desire for you a little longer

It is impossible for a woman to love you like you love her. Her “love”, that you desire, is based on her desire for you. She can love you to death and despise the idea of sex with you. Again, biology.

you’ve been living in a dream world. It doesn’t exist. Not even for any species of primate.

Get these through your head and then start the climb out.

 

[DariusTheBartender]

Let's put aside the relationship.. why did you gain weight? Is this new job worth the money for 11 hour days? I know it sucks, we've all been there, but can't move forward while looking backwards.

 

[rayv12]

Let's put aside the relationship.. why did you gain weight? Is this new job worth the money for 11 hour days? I know it sucks, we've all been there, but can't move forward while looking backwards.

I am an engineer by education. This is my first real job after almost 2 years of search. While I was looking for a job I worked at random places to get by. Now I've got this job after countless attempts and my boss expects me to deliver as me being on probation for next 3 more months(if I do well I will be permanent). High blood pressure and anxiety is something that I've been dealing with for the past 6 months.

 

[Clamslammer]

She did you a favor. You thought she was the one, no she is a low character girl going behind your back and cheating on you. She will cheat on this new dude as well. Always put yourself first and be working on yourself.

 

[Black Widow Void]

A two year relationship at your age, is a long time.
Working through this can at times be difficult. Be prepared. There may be times (especially if drinking) when you may forget her bad traits and remembering the good.
This might sound a little silly, but it works.
When you are in an 'anger' state, my advice is to write down the traits that you didn't like about her. I suggest this because if you find yourself in a confused state or regretful state (lots of us, including self have been there) . These notes will put you back on track and you'll get over this much quicker.

 

[Focal core]

I am an engineer by education. This is my first real job after almost 2 years of search. While I was looking for a job I worked at random places to get by. Now I've got this job after countless attempts and my boss expects me to deliver as me being on probation for next 3 more months(if I do well I will be permanent). High blood pressure and anxiety is something that I've been dealing with for the past 6 months.

And by those conditions of yours she's having fun and claim she still love you, what are you? A chopped liver? Man yes like @Clamslammer said she did you a favor.

 

[In2theGame]

I broke up with my ltr a week ago when my friend saw her at some bar with a guy she works with. She was ignoring my calls and acting weird for weeks.
A year ago she was all over me, now I am going through some health issues, gained weight(>10kg) and a new job where I work (>11hrs).

I saw the relationship going down the drain and broke up stating I don't wish her to see anymore as I felt disrespected by her behaviour and she should be more open about things rather than lie and party with some dude.

She is still partying with a new guy who is all over her Instagram. I felt terrible last night got drunk broke NC after a week and ended up answering her call asking(crying) why she did this to me, she said she just wanted to enjoy a bit and she still loves me.

I am a bit lost at the moment after 2 years when I thought she is the one, and things are getting serious she starts going out with some dude over me.
Is Love even a thing?

You did the right thing. Period.

 

[RickTheToad]

Rule 1 of red pill (or just being a solid dude). Don't put up with disrespectful sh!t. You call your lady out on it immediately. If she doesn't apologize, you get rid of her. Institute a one strike policy and never bring the trash back in once you get rid of it. There's 3.5 billion pvssys in the world. You'll find another one. Stick to this philosophy and you'll be aces.

 

[stovepipe]

This is a great situation to be in. It's one of those times where you learn a valuable lesson in life about women and yourself. You must realize that if you ever talk to her again, she will remember you as weak. If you stay no contact from here on out, she will remember you as a man who respected himself.

You slipped once by answering her call, don't let that happen again! She revealed her true self by saying she wanted to enjoy "herself", while fake crying, fake empathy. She only truly cares about herself and it shows by her actions & words. Women are great manipulators, don't let her get in your head thinking she's actually sorry for what she did. She's only sorry for getting caught.

Now's the time to focus on your career, work on yourself and enjoy being single. If and when you start missing her, just remember how she ignored your calls while hanging out with another guy. That is disrespect at a high level. She did you favor cause it could have ended a lot worse if you didn't leave when you did.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

I broke up with my ltr a week ago when my friend saw her at some bar with a guy she works with. She was ignoring my calls and acting weird for weeks.
A year ago she was all over me, now I am going through some health issues, gained weight(>10kg) and a new job where I work (>11hrs).

I saw the relationship going down the drain and broke up stating I don't wish her to see anymore as I felt disrespected by her behaviour and she should be more open about things rather than lie and party with some dude.

She is still partying with a new guy who is all over her Instagram. I felt terrible last night got drunk broke NC after a week and ended up answering her call asking(crying) why she did this to me, she said she just wanted to enjoy a bit and she still loves me.

I am a bit lost at the moment after 2 years when I thought she is the one, and things are getting serious she starts going out with some dude over me.
Is Love even a thing?

2yrs? So, you mean to say, you have 2yrs worth of making up for in the game lol.

Love is a series of dopamine spikes and endorphins.

Its a cute narrative to keep society orderly.

Note, women seek single life when on top of their SMV.

The milk goes bad, Chad stops calling, and now she wants to play house after best yrs are done.

The whole thing is a dumpster fire.


The benchmark is top form SMV 18-23 or do not want.

Its catch and release fellas. Monogamy is phaggotry and cuck.

Her best was pissed away. Real talk.

Meanwhile hotter girls are turning 18 everyday.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

 

[Trump]

2yrs? So, you mean to say, you have 2yrs worth of making up for in the game lol.

Love is a series of dopamine spikes and endorphins.

Its a cute narrative to keep society orderly.

Note, women seek single life when on top of their SMV.

The milk goes bad, Chad stops calling, and now she wants to play house after best yrs are done.

The whole thing is a dumpster fire.


The benchmark is top form SMV 18-23 or do not want.

Its catch and release fellas. Monogamy is phaggotry and cuck.

Her best was pissed away. Real talk.

Meanwhile hotter girls are turning 18 everyday.

100% agree bro.

But what do you do if you want to have kids? 18 year old top form SMV is not going to get pregnant from a 30 - 45 year old guy.

 

[rayv12]

After the incident I am actually better now maybe the crying helped me and I don’t feel any anger(weird) I am ready to let this one go. I think holding back just gave me more pain.

Time again I forget that women are just what they are no matter how long you be with them it was foolish of me to think she was any different or anyone could be.

I just went through my old pictures where I was in the best shape being happy, exercising and confident.

My health is something i will be taking care of moving forward. I always wanted to learn swimming and I think I will start that on weekends for now. Deleted our pictures, texts from my phone blocked her contacts.

Sosuave has always been the place where I share things when women let me down and the guys here have always helped me gain perspective. Thanks

 

[Focal core]

After the incident I am actually better now maybe the crying helped me and I don’t feel any anger(weird) I am ready to let this one go. I think holding back just gave me more pain.

Nothing weird in it.. Honoring your feelings is always a way to go towards healing.. Congratulations.

 

[Clamslammer]

After the incident I am actually better now maybe the crying helped me and I don’t feel any anger(weird) I am ready to let this one go. I think holding back just gave me more pain.

Time again I forget that women are just what they are no matter how long you be with them it was foolish of me to think she was any different or anyone could be.

I just went through my old pictures where I was in the best shape being happy, exercising and confident.

My health is something i will be taking care of moving forward. I always wanted to learn swimming and I think I will start that on weekends for now. Deleted our pictures, texts from my phone blocked her contacts.

Sosuave has always been the place where I share things when women let me down and the guys here have always helped me gain perspective. Thanks

Do not beat yourself up dude 95% of girls are pretty much not relationship material. Your job is to weed out the crap to find the small percentage that is quality. The pros are that you learned this early and learned what too look out for in regards to red flags for your future relationships without going through a divorce and kids...count yourself lucky. I know its hard out there because you thought she was quality and you think you will not find another but you will. Always focus on yourself and girls will throw themselves at you, your job is to screen them.

I bet you saw the red flags even before getting into the relationship but you just ignored them because you did not know what to look for and you were infatuated with her looks and attention. The day you can reject an attractive girl because she does not have the qualities you look for is the day you know you have arrived because it is hard to reject a nice piece of a$$.

 

[andreihaha]

Imagine if you had married her, dodged a bullet. Imagine her stealing your kid to be raised by this new guy lol. Once a cheater always a cheater. None of my exes that cheated went on to have good relationships, just bounce around forever.

That last line is pure gold.
Never thought about this, but you're right, my cheating exes do the same.