Women who play “hard to get”

[BJP1991]

What’s your opinion and how do you handle it?

I’m not going to just next a girl if she’s waiting forever to reply but still is making plans to see me in person.

Game playing, taking forever to reply, all while still making it easy for you to see them and make a date seems like classic “hard to get” gameplaying to me.

It shouldn’t always be an indicator of low interest I would think. And in the past some girls who did this with me ended up having the highest interest of any I’ve dated.

Thoughts/Experiences with girls who play hard-to-get early on but still accept your date offers?

 

[SeekerOfTheWay]

i am “accused “ of playing hard to get a lot and it makes men chase and try harder. in a not so ironic twist, i am never playing... i just have no to low interest. a women will show enthusiasm if she is interested. we can try and be coy at times but not all the time as it’s not really natural.

 

[Poonani Maker]

we can try and be coy at times but not all the time as it’s not really natural

the female being coy is natural across all species, it's the male who's eager across almost all species

 

[Robert28]

i am “accused “ of playing hard to get a lot and it makes men chase and try harder. in a not so ironic twist, i am never playing... i just have no to low interest. a women will show enthusiasm if she is interested. we can try and be coy at times but not all the time as it’s not really natural.

I used to chase and try harder as you say. The last 10 years I’ve become lazy and if you don’t make it easy for me, I’m gone.

 

[Epic Days]

i am “accused “ of playing hard to get a lot and it makes men chase and try harder. in a not so ironic twist, i am never playing... i just have no to low interest. a women will show enthusiasm if she is interested. we can try and be coy at times but not all the time as it’s not really natural.

This. No to low interest. But then just saying that doesn’t lead to a solution. Anyone can say anything but it doesn’t mean it leads to a solution.

If she wants you to fill her holes, there wont be any ambiguity. True, you have to get her in front of you willingly. Did you approach her randomly without indicators? A message to an online wench?

 

[Glassguy]

When women think I'm playing hard to get its because my interest in them is low.

Women are the same. They dont necessarily play hard to get. It's that men arent direct and ask them out and then bounce if they dont get a yes and a date.

Make your interest clear and if she doesnt make it easy you should be dust in the wind.

 

[Glassguy]

Rich men get there by taking what they want in life through hard and smart work. Same goes with getting women.

But remember that you cant take something that is not available for you to take.

 

[BJP1991]

When a woman shows signs of playing “hard to get” while also displaying a higher interest, it’s usually just their way of telling you they want you to be more aggressive/dominant in that particular area.

Interesting. Thank you all for the replies. The most recent girl in question is going out with me this weekend.

The other night when she hit me back, I decided to stop delaying and mirroring her response rate and hit her back after a few minutes. That opened the floodgates - long, flirty texts, nearly instant-replies from her, etc. exchanged 3-4 messages and got the exact date plans nailed down. I usually just go for the kill right away (I.e. cut through the bull**** and make date plans and avoid unnecessary banter/text chitchat, and let her do all the long paragraph texting and chitchat nonsense while I just led the text convo to result in definite date plans).


Interesting how a girl can delay responses for 12-24 hours, then suddenly open up and be firing them off like crazy and flirting and all the usual crap.

I’m always very direct when it comes to texting. I get to the point and take the lead to make plans, never leaving **** up in the air or without a definite outcome/date plan.

 

[oldmanofthesea]

A lot of guys will say a woman will make things easy if they’re really into you, and there is definitely truth to that.

But a lot of women also don’t want to come off as too easy either. They want to know a guy is into them enough that he’ll go get what he wants too. So sometimes playing things too aloof is no good either.

Balance.

I'm curious as to how you respond to that..... if you are dominant, by asking her out for a date, and she says she will let you know or maybe or doesn't respond, how much more dominant can you be? Any additional pursuit from you at that point would be chasing. Or do you have different specific scenarios of how a woman plays hard to get and what your response to that is?

 

[Glassguy]

A lot of guys will say a woman will make things easy if they’re really into you, and there is definitely truth to that.

But a lot of women also don’t want to come off as too easy either. They want to know a guy is into them enough that he’ll go get what he wants too. So sometimes playing things too aloof is no good either.

Balance.

I totally agree.

I dont want to add anything to your post, but I do want to clarify something for guys on here who struggle with this.

Man shows interest/intent.
Intent is to hang out/go for drinks/date/etc
Man invites woman out/over/etc
Woman says yes AND shows up. Win win situation and handled correctly.

But IF:
Man invites woman out
Woman cannot make that time and counter offers another day and time
Man agrees, woman says yes AND shows up. Win win situation and handled correctly.

The 2 areas that low interest gets confused with playing "hard to get":

1.) Man doesnt ask woman out. Maybe man waits forever and woman's interest level was once high enough to go out with him but after the man not leading and setting the date for weeks, she lost interest. Therefore she still shows SOME interest but has no plans to go out with him since he didnt have a strong enough frame to ask her out directly and early on in the beginning.

2.) Man ask woman out and she gives him a "maybe", "Probably", "we'll see", etc. other than a YES or a specific counter offer. Man continues to show woman attention even though she is not doing anything to deserve said attention. So man is chasing a low/no interest woman who uses the man for attention/validation with no intent to ever go out with him and certainly is not sexually attracted to him. That is the main pitfall.

Want to know where you stand? Ask her to meet up for drinks. Let her answer dictate where the situation goes. If she says YES (and shows up), you are good. Then you just have to be chill yet social and let her come to you.

If she gives you the run around when you ask her out, disappear. If she was playing hard to get, she will quickly reappear on your radar and make things very easy if you chose to take another stab at it.

Most guys wont ask the woman out directly and early on because they dont want to get rejected.

I would rather find out very early on because I have no time to waste to figure out if the interest is mutual or not.

Its set the date, she shows up and we go from there or I am gone.

 

[Trump]

1.) Man doesnt ask woman out. Maybe man waits forever and woman's interest level was once high enough to go out with him but after the man not leading and setting the date for weeks, she lost interest. Therefore she still shows SOME interest but has no plans to go out with him since he didnt have a strong enough frame to ask her out directly and early on in the beginning.

This could also be considered Man has low interest. Wants to get rid of her so he delays asking her out hoping she will get tired and give up.

2.) Man ask woman out and she gives him a "maybe", "Probably", "we'll see", etc. other than a YES or a specific counter offer. Man continues to show woman attention even though she is not doing anything to deserve said attention. So man is chasing a low/no interest woman who uses the man for attention/validation with no intent to ever go out with him and certainly is not sexually attracted to him. That is the main pitfall.

What would you say to a “maybe”.

 

[Glassguy]

This could also be considered Man has low interest. Wants to get rid of her so he delays asking her out hoping she will get tired and give up.



What would you say to a “maybe”.

I wouldn't say anything. I'd be dust in the wind.

Withdrawing the offer is beta shyte. It comes across as butthurt IMO no matter how you slice it.

At best my response would be "k" and if she never reached back out, she would never hear from me again.

 

[Xenom0rph]

I believe women dont play hard-to-get anymore, that was more of a 1980's thing..... These days women are bombarded with attention from legions of thirsty men that they simply dont have time (or just dont care) about responding quickly to texts....

Sadly, men arent nexting anyone these dsys, men are getting nexted...

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

What’s your opinion and how do you handle it?

I’m not going to just next a girl if she’s waiting forever to reply but still is making plans to see me in person.

Game playing, taking forever to reply, all while still making it easy for you to see them and make a date seems like classic “hard to get” gameplaying to me.

It shouldn’t always be an indicator of low interest I would think. And in the past some girls who did this with me ended up having the highest interest of any I’ve dated.

Thoughts/Experiences with girls who play hard-to-get early on but still accept your date offers?

Chain gun cold approach. Go get baeees. Hit. On girls.

Abundance ftw!

Hotter girls are turning 18 19 20 21 every day. Feels good man.

Act as such.

BJP mate, the assumption is hard to get. It's all bait and switch.

I lead. She follows or next. Repeat. No exception.

Not in the mood, games, anything but feminine, submissive, dtf, and aesthetic, #nextSet!

Every girl problem can be fixed with more options.

If she’s not with the program, FALL BACK!

A couple invitations should suffice. Anything more than is simping and pandering. Run your leads. Run your funnel.

Her behavior is all you have to judge for her interest level. You sir are the prize. Act accordingly. The world does not need another simp or cuck.

#next is GOAT STATUS.

Its indicative of a high value man with options. Even if you have none, act as such and go get more baeeeees.

Don't get it twisted. A egg drops every month. The wall approaches. Someone hotter is 18 at midnight.

Run your funnel. Compliance is key. No better indication of interest level than compliance. Anything but is grounds for dismissal or downgrade to booty call. Plate will smash on its own sooner or later by their own stupidity.

Good riddance. Do your part. Surrender to the process.

Spoiler

SMASH OR NEXT! REPEAT

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

I believe women dont play hard-to-get anymore, that was more of a 1980's thing..... These days women are bombarded with attention from legions of thirsty men that they simply dont have time (or just dont care) about responding quickly to texts....

Sadly, men arent nexting anyone these dsys, men are getting nexted...

Lmfao. I smash or i next but not before trolling.

Trolling as a hobby since early 2000s.

If you aren't smashin or trolling, you ain't doing it right kuz.

Disclaimer : life trolls women harder than you or I ever could lololol.

Look no further than your high school yr book or run into women from your past. Hilarious!

 

[logicallefty]

Push/pull runs the show.

Her IL could be sky high but if you show her yours is too, she pulls back.

You show less IL and hers will increase.

Push here. Pull there. In the end where u want to be is where her IL is greater than yours appears to be, by a moderate amount. But not by too much or it can also backfire.

 

[jnMissouri]

Women are biologically programmed to play hard to get to test your sincerity and authenticity. You produce millions of sperm a day, they produce one egg a month. They get saddled with the kid (think cave man days, evolution) if they get pregnant...so they need to be sure you're sincere not just a wham bam thank you mam. They will also test you to see if you are really confident and who you say you are. If you cave at the smallest sign of resistance, you show weakness.

A dated a stripper in her early twenties when I was in my mid twenties. We went out. The end of the date came, she had a hotel. I invited myself over, she said to do what...I said to watch TV and hang out. She said OK. Went there...over the course of maybe an hour I tried to kiss her three times, she pulled away each time but I could tell she wanted to from the way she did. Think about it, she got a hotel, allowed me to come back...it was a test. I kept trying and by the fourth time or so we made out and had sex. She sucked me off the next morning one last time before I left. She wasn't some 10 of a stripper, she was from the mid-west but still HOT and good in bed. It was a huge confidence boost. Point is some women will play hard to get and some won't. As they get older the games drop off more. Heck even some younger ones don't play games. But most do. Persistence works.

 

[jnMissouri]

Heck a recent plate who came to see me from 6 hours away driving. I tried to kiss her in the elevator of the hotel within the first 30 minutes. She pulled back. I didn't break stride. Tried again a couple hours later and ****ed the **** out of her repeatedly. On a recent trip to see me she mentioned that I kept trying even though she felt I might be hurt after the elevator brush off. I asked her if I broke stride exiting the elevator, she said no. I was like, EXACTLY...I still ****ed you and you're still driving 6 hours one way to **** me again. I have enough confidence to keep trying. Now again, not all women are like this. Most women I try to kiss have no issue. And if I can get them alone I know it's in the bag. Just keep pushing each interaction as far as it can go.

 

[Mazer]

If she plays hard to get, I play easy to replace. Next!

 

[oldmanofthesea]

That’s just low interest. More dominance isn’t going to get you anywhere, IMO. Just move on and forward. She’s the one who will have to be more aggressive at that point. Not me.


Nothing grand or complicated. I think @Glassguy laid it out pretty well in his post above.

But in a nutshell, I think a lot of guys who try to play it too aloof are most likely the ones who get into this hard to get situation that can be overcome with more directness.

But if a guy is direct from the beginning and still getting that hard to get game, that’s what it is: a low interest game. Not a lot you can or should try to do with that.

Gotcha. I'm always quite direct and meet all the girls I date through cold approach so I was curious as to what situations could require even more dominance than a direct approach already provides.