Did your wife/ex-wife change after kids?

[speed dawg]

@logicallefty post partum is no joke. I knew as soon as you said she divorced you less than a year after the kids was born, that she was acting based on depression, rather than in with her head on straight. I'm sure she has regrets. It sucks that you had to endure this.

This is why all those guys called you out in this thread. Your stench can be smelled a mile away.

A lot of women have post partum depression, but they don't do what Lefty's wife did. I'd be willing to bet she was a little entitled princess as well. It's the whole picture, the ENTIRE behavior.

 

[Ranger]

This is why all those guys called you out in this thread. Your stench can be smelled a mile away.

A lot of women have post partum depression, but they don't do what Lefty's wife did. I'd be willing to bet she was a little entitled princess as well. It's the whole picture, the ENTIRE behavior.

When mine suffered through it she came to me.

 

[sazc]

This is why all those guys called you out in this thread. Your stench can be smelled a mile away.

A lot of women have post partum depression, but they don't do what Lefty's wife did. I'd be willing to bet she was a little entitled princess as well. It's the whole picture, the ENTIRE behavior.

I have no idea the dynamic that lefty and his wife had. I do know that, as with any other depression, there are varying DEGREES of post partum depression - everything from a mild case of the 'baby blues' to a severe case of "I hate this kid and I'm going to kill it"

Try researching things you don't understand instead of posting and looking like a bitter ignorant a$$hole

 

[highSpeed]

I have no idea the dynamic that lefty and his wife had. I do know that, as with any other depression, there are varying DEGREES of post partum depression - everything from a mild case of the 'baby blues' to a severe case of "I hate this kid and I'm going to kill it"

Try researching things you don't understand instead of posting and looking like a bitter ignorant a$$hole

That's not the point, where someone falls on the depression scale, it's how they handle it. Simply taking it out on you, dropping all the negativity on you, that's not right. Look, you can put up with a certain amount of it but everyone has their limits. I've been blamed for plenty of things, this is yet another of the many I've been blamed for.

Post partum depression's ugly specter was blamed on me, that I didn't support enough, that I was not there enough. I worked long hours yes but when I was there, I was there. I changed diapers in the middle of the night, did night feedings, which of course she denies but I did it. She did more of it but I took the load probably around 25% of the time, combined with my long work hours, was about all I could do. And this is the case with most women, no matter what you do, it's not right and/or it's not enough. To give you an example, my wife will literally come behind me and refold the laundry that I just folded because it's not how she does it. That's the insanity levels that I have to reach. Another example, she literally stood over me while I put in a new mailbox and told me how to do it. I'm in the middle of augering the hole, putting the mailbox together and completing the task and she has the temerity to stand there and nag me about how she would do it.

Look, I get it, you bring a female perspective and for nothing other than at least getting the female mindset on some things, it can be valuable. But I see you shaming, name calling and simply calling people out for their perspectives. Yes, she has a perspective, you have a perspective and believe it or not, which females seem to lack the awareness to do, the guy has a perspective too. His feelings get hurt too. He might actually have a valid viewpoint that might differ from the females. He might also be wrong too but if what Lefty was describing was correct, that's bad behavior. You can't use your post partum depression to get a pass on all your bad behavior.

 

[sazc]

That's not the point, where someone falls on the depression scale, it's how they handle it. Simply taking it out on you, dropping all the negativity on you, that's not right. Look, you can put up with a certain amount of it but everyone has their limits. I've been blamed for plenty of things, this is yet another of the many I've been blamed for.

Post partum depression's ugly specter was blamed on me, that I didn't support enough, that I was not there enough. I worked long hours yes but when I was there, I was there. I changed diapers in the middle of the night, did night feedings, which of course she denies but I did it. She did more of it but I took the load probably around 25% of the time, combined with my long work hours, was about all I could do. And this is the case with most women, no matter what you do, it's not right and/or it's not enough. To give you an example, my wife will literally come behind me and refold the laundry that I just folded because it's not how she does it. That's the insanity levels that I have to reach. Another example, she literally stood over me while I put in a new mailbox and told me how to do it. I'm in the middle of augering the hole, putting the mailbox together and completing the task and she has the temerity to stand there and nag me about how she would do it.

Look, I get it, you bring a female perspective and for nothing other than at least getting the female mindset on some things, it can be valuable. But I see you shaming, name calling and simply calling people out for their perspectives. Yes, she has a perspective, you have a perspective and believe it or not, which females seem to lack the awareness to do, the guy has a perspective too. His feelings get hurt too. He might actually have a valid viewpoint that might differ from the females. He might also be wrong too but if what Lefty was describing was correct, that's bad behavior. You can't use your post partum depression to get a pass on all your bad behavior.

I have no idea what you are talking about. I posted that it sucked that she made the decisions that she did during the time when she was experiencing post partum. I posted that it was CLEAR that her decisions were made as a result of going thru the depression.

We're saying the same thing. How in the fvck are you getting it so god damn twisted?

 

[highSpeed]

I have no idea what you are talking about. I posted that it sucked that she made the decisions that she did during the time when she was experiencing post partum. I posted that it was CLEAR that her decisions were made as a result of going thru the depression.

We're saying the same thing. How in the fvck are you getting it so god damn twisted?

Wow, here you go again. In case you were wondering, here's the message I'm replying to:

I have no idea the dynamic that lefty and his wife had. I do know that, as with any other depression, there are varying DEGREES of post partum depression - everything from a mild case of the 'baby blues' to a severe case of "I hate this kid and I'm going to kill it"

Try researching things you don't understand instead of posting and looking like a bitter ignorant a$$hole

But hey, instead of addressing my actual post, you again act like a little kid. Oh well, typical female. What a twit.

 

[Ranger]

I posted that it was CLEAR that her decisions were made as a result of going thru the depression.

We're saying the same thing. How in the fvck are you getting it so good damn twisted?

He’s not getting it twisted. You gave her a justification. Depression. Or at least bought into the justification. This is the type of crap that makes life suck.
There’s a lot more to this story that he either doesn’t know or isn’t willing to reveal.
How did our race ever survive through everything in the face of depression and/or hardships. This is a first world problem.

He is right. She turned it all onto him. Maybe he should have gotten a dog so she could have kicked it around instead?
These things are normal social constructs. So it makes sense that it is not recognized by you. It’s fashionable to lay stuff on the man. Or the man being an indirect cause.

 

[sazc]

Wow, here you go again. In case you were wondering, here's the message I'm replying to:

I have no idea the dynamic that lefty and his wife had. I do know that, as with any other depression, there are varying DEGREES of post partum depression - everything from a mild case of the 'baby blues' to a severe case of "I hate this kid and I'm going to kill it"

Try researching things you don't understand instead of posting and looking like a bitter ignorant a$$hole

But hey, instead of addressing my actual post, you again act like a little kid. Oh well, typical female. What a twit.

What the ever loving fvck are you talking about?

You want to get into a REAL discussion about post partum depression with me, understand where my head is at when it comes to dealing with mental illness in a relationship? Them act like a fvcking man and start A DISCUSSION with me.

Until then, don't project your crappy marriage bvllchit and experiences onto me and assume that I am defending anyone. Your assumptions of my viewpoints are incorrect, invalid and PROJECTIONS. The fact that you can't see that speaks volumes about you.

Grow up

 

[sazc]

He’s not getting it twisted. You gave her a justification. Depression. Or at least bought into the justification. This is the type of crap that makes life suck.
There’s a lot more to this story that he either doesn’t know or isn’t willing to reveal.
How did our race ever survive through everything in the face of depression and/or hardships. This is a first world problem.

He is right. She turned it all onto him. Maybe he should have gotten a dog so she could have kicked it around instead?
These things are normal social constructs. So it makes sense that it is not recognized by you. It’s fashionable to lay stuff on the man. Or the man being an indirect cause.

Nah. Ur bitter betties that twist my words and make assumptions about how I think and feel JUST SO you can validate how you think and feel. You do it all the time. It's CRAZY how you extend my words in order to project your beliefs about how women "are" onto what I say.

Ppl who do this type of stuff have issues. They aren't interested in anything else but promoting their viewpoint.

It's all good

 

[Ranger]

Nah. Ur bitter betties that twist my words and make assumptions about how I think and feel JUST SO you can validate how you think and feel. You do it all the time. It's CRAZY how you extend my words in order to project your beliefs about how women "are" onto what I say.

Ppl who do this type of stuff have issues. They aren't interested in anything else but promoting their viewpoint.

It's all good

I wasn’t getting on you. I was merely pointing out that unbeknownst to you...you buy into social narratives. It’s second nature. Automatic.
A woman who kills her baby should receive no pardon. In the West, we are very weak spoiled people. People have no clue whatsoever what strong is in the West. It’s revolting.

He was pointing out what is obvious to us. I don’t expect you to see it. It’s not in your collective thought mechanics.

 

[highSpeed]

What the ever loving fvck are you talking about?

You want to get into a REAL discussion about post partum depression with me, understand where my head is at when it comes to dealing with mental illness in a relationship? Them act like a fvcking man and start A DISCUSSION with me.

Until then, don't project your crappy marriage bvllchit and experiences onto me and assume that I am defending anyone. Your assumptions of my viewpoints are incorrect, invalid and PROJECTIONS. The fact that you can't see that speaks volumes about you.

Grow up

Wow, you're a real witch, good god, I feel for the guy that decides to crawl inside that crazy a$$ head of yours, he's a real glutton for punishment. Projections and attacks, that's what you seem to thrive on. Good luck with that.

 

[sazc]

I wasn’t getting on you. I was merely pointing out that unbeknownst to you...you buy into social narratives. It’s second nature. Automatic.
A woman who kills her baby should receive no pardon. In the West, we are very weak spoiled people. People have no clue whatsoever what strong is in the West. It’s revolting.

He was pointing out what is obvious to us. I don’t expect you to see it. It’s not in your collective thought mechanics.

Again, no idea what you are talking about but cool if you weren't getting on me (snowballs must be alive and well in hell today? Lol)

Mental illness is no joke and extremely difficult for people to navigate in relationships. I sure as he11 couldn't navigate it successfully in my marriage.

The scope of any mental illness discussion is deeper than projection, assumption and blame onto anyone.

Idk, I was taught to communicate and discuss, rather than kneejerk assign cognitive assumptions onto a group of ppl because if their race, religion, gender, etc. IMO Thinking like that keeps you locked in a small cognitive cage. But that's just me.

Edit: none of that was directed at you @Ranger

 

[sazc]

Wow, you're a real witch, good god, I feel for the guy that decides to crawl inside that crazy a$$ head of yours, he's a real glutton for punishment. Projections and attacks, that's what you seem to thrive on. Good luck with that.

LMAO now I'm a witch? Again, project much? Good Lord you have issues!

 

[Ranger]

Again, no idea what you are talking about but cool if you weren't getting on me (snowballs must be alive and well in hell today? Lol)

Mental illness is no joke and extremely difficult for people to navigate in relationships. I sure as he11 couldn't navigate it successfully in my marriage.

The scope of any mental illness discussion is deeper than projection, assumption and blame onto anyone.

Idk, I was taught to communicate and discuss, rather than kneejerk assign cognitive assumptions onto a group of ppl because if their race, religion, gender, etc. IMO Thinking like that keeps you locked in a small cognitive cage. But that's just me.

Haha. That was a nice try. I’m outside the collective.

 

[highSpeed]

LMAO now I'm a witch? Again, project much? Good Lord you have issues!

ditto, ditto super funny that you put a lmao, I can hear your witch cackle/cankle now lol.

 

[Spaz]

It's interesting to see who here falls for the bullshiet of the feminine imperative.

Sazc is as usual churning out her Blue Pill's wrapped in Red Pill coverings to hoodwinked the more gullible members here into something more malleable for the imperative.

Business must be real slow for her in real life to end up selling blue pills online in SS.

The real life failures must be real hard and kinda pitiful though.

It must be an indirect cry for help.

Sazc you need help in ur real life salesmanship?

 

[speed dawg]

Again, no idea what you are talking about but cool if you weren't getting on me (snowballs must be alive and well in hell today? Lol)

Mental illness is no joke and extremely difficult for people to navigate in relationships. I sure as he11 couldn't navigate it successfully in my marriage.

The scope of any mental illness discussion is deeper than projection, assumption and blame onto anyone.

Idk, I was taught to communicate and discuss, rather than kneejerk assign cognitive assumptions onto a group of ppl because if their race, religion, gender, etc. IMO Thinking like that keeps you locked in a small cognitive cage. But that's just me.

Edit: none of that was directed at you @Ranger

Now you are using your own mental health as an excuse for your own behavior. It's not an excuse. Mental health is some of the most unadulterated bullsh*t we've been fed over the past 50 years. If you're crazy, you're crazy.

So, again - I DO NOT RESPECT MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES.

People should grow the f*ck up, develop some self-awareness and act right. Do what you have to do to feel better, go see a preacher, therapist, whatever.....just don't tell me about it. I don't care about your FEELZ.

 

[Ranger]

Now you are using your own mental health as an excuse for your own behavior. It's not an excuse. Mental health is some of the most unadulterated bullsh*t we've been fed over the past 50 years. If you're crazy, you're crazy.

So, again - I DO NOT RESPECT MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES.

People should grow the f*ck up, develop some self-awareness and act right. Do what you have to do to feel better, go see a preacher, therapist, whatever.....just don't tell me about it. I don't care about your FEELZ.

I do not respect mental health issues either. People think they are entitled to happiness without ever lifting a finger.

 

[highSpeed]

Now you are using your own mental health as an excuse for your own behavior. It's not an excuse. Mental health is some of the most unadulterated bullsh*t we've been fed over the past 50 years. If you're crazy, you're crazy.

So, again - I DO NOT RESPECT MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES.

People should grow the f*ck up, develop some self-awareness and act right. Do what you have to do to feel better, go see a preacher, therapist, whatever.....just don't tell me about it. I don't care about your FEELZ.

I know, it's like "hey, I feel really, really depressed, I'm going to use that as justification for treating you like sh*t. You're a convenient punching bag. Oh yea and if you try to give me any of my medicine back, I'm going to say you're abusive, controlling and have anger issues." Lol, these women, it's tough to get any sort of ground to develop a framework to work together anymore.

Validate me, validate me, validate me, that's all that goes through their head. Anything else is viewed as an attack. God, anyone else remember the breakfast club days? Boy, those were good days, so much less bullsh*t and people could just relate. They may not always agree but they could at least attempt to relate instead of immediately seeing everything as an attack and going on the offensive.

 

[sazc]

Now you are using your own mental health as an excuse for your own behavior. It's not an excuse. Mental health is some of the most unadulterated bullsh*t we've been fed over the past 50 years. If you're crazy, you're crazy.

So, again - I DO NOT RESPECT MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES.

People should grow the f*ck up, develop some self-awareness and act right. Do what you have to do to feel better, go see a preacher, therapist, whatever.....just don't tell me about it. I don't care about your FEELZ.

Assumptions and projections yet again, eh?

It wasn't my mental health, it was my ex's mental health, specifically depression, rooted in his childhood. I did everything I knew to do but, ultimately the depressed person, themselves, have to recognize their illness and want to get help for themselves. You can lead a horse to water... As a partner you can only do 'so much', and that is if you even realize the other person has a mental illness.

You've confirmed what I said before. You base your rhetoric off of assumptions and projections instead of actually attempting to engage in mature conversation.

Have fun with that approach in life.