Bumble match and date scenerio

[StrayCat]

I am working on younger women in their 20's and early 30's. This one swiped right on me a few days ago and I opened communication as well. We went back and forth for 3 or 4 times and I asked for her number and if she'd like to meet for a drink. She replied absolutely and gave me her cellphone on Wednesday. I reached out Thursday and and she was down with a cold. I suggested we meet next Friday at a pub we both know, she agreed. I told her see you then. If anything changes, let me know and feel better. She said you too and see you then. I logged in this morning to bumble while having some breakfast, and I noticed that her match was closed out. Does this mean we're prob. not going to meet for drinks next Friday? This happened before with another woman, be we met up and she said you had my number, there wasn't a need to keep the bumble connection open. Does this ring true?

 

[backseatjuan]

Well you have her number, you will find out soon. Though get going a back up plan.

The only thing I could suggest is either you move in quick, or you play high class and take it easy, wait and sh1t. You can't have it both ways. I always play quick, it works for me. I see you there getting number on Wednesday, calling on Thursday, and then setting up a date a whole week later on Friday. It's nice to expect that a woman probably has life going on, but it's not always the case man. I wouldn't wait a whole week, I'd give her a call the next day, and set it up for that same evening or give her a chance, tell her I'm free tonight or that other night. Sometimes man when you move in quick things happen.

If she finds you attractive she will date you, if not back off couple of weeks, repeat.

I'm high on tea, I'm sorry, tea with sugar gives you attention deficit, plus I'm doing some other stuff here. I did not pay attention to your post. She has low interest man. You do not text her from now until next Friday. You do not text for couple of weeks, only then you text her. But yea, sounds like you were an option, but she got something else going on, so she flaked, gave you a bullsh1t story about being sick. Don't roll with it. If anything wait a little before trying again.

Be sure to get some ass before now and then.

 

[flowtheory]

I am working on younger women in their 20's and early 30's. This one swiped right on me a few days ago and I opened communication as well. We went back and forth for 3 or 4 times and I asked for her number and if she'd like to meet for a drink. She replied absolutely and gave me her cellphone on Wednesday. I reached out Thursday and and she was down with a cold. I suggested we meet next Friday at a pub we both know, she agreed. I told her see you then. If anything changes, let me know and feel better. She said you too and see you then. I logged in this morning to bumble while having some breakfast, and I noticed that her match was closed out. Does this mean we're prob. not going to meet for drinks next Friday? This happened before with another woman, be we met up and she said you had my number, there wasn't a need to keep the bumble connection open. Does this ring true?

You have her number already. Doesn’t matter. Keep up the texting before you meet up next Friday for the pub. Shoot a message after the weekend. I’d say she’s interested if a reschedule was already involved. And her wording sounds enthusiastic.
Maybe she deleted bumble.

 

[marmel75]

If you choose not to text her until the date its a 100% flake

 

[sazc]

I wouldn't worry about it. You have her number.

Personally I don't close matches before the meet because then I won't remember what they look like when we do finally meet

 

[R.U.G.]

Few scenerios here. 1) She's seeing how you'd act by closing. 2) low interest and your a back up. 3) She already has your info so she doesn't need your match. Who knows. Whatever it is, don't chase and let it be. Rest assured you'd know in a few days time. If it's a no go, just say no problem. If you up for meeting in the future, LMK; or something like that. I'm going to go against the grain and stick with NC til the meet (it's a meet bro, not date). This is what AMS suggests as well as Aaron Roger Currie; so stick with NC. You want to be different from other bros. Most will be hitting her up confirming and stuff. Don't be that AFC.

 

[flowtheory]

Few scenerios here. 1) She's seeing how you'd act by closing. 2) low interest and your a back up. 3) She already has your info so she doesn't need your match. Who knows. Whatever it is, don't chase and let it be. Rest assured you'd know in a few days time. If it's a no go, just say no problem. If you up for meeting in the future, LMK; or something like that. I'm going to go against the grain and stick with NC til the meet (it's a meet bro, not date). This is what AMS suggests as well as Aaron Roger Currie; so stick with NC. You want to be different from other bros. Most will be hitting her up confirming and stuff. Don't be that AFC.

To go NC all the way until next Friday is crazy. She has tons of guys hitting her up via bumble vying for her attention.
It would be in his best interest to stoke the logs a bit to keep the temperature warm. Just don’t be needy about it.

 

[R.U.G.]

To go NC all the way until next Friday is crazy. She has tons of guys hitting her up via bumble vying for her attention.
It would be in his best interest to stoke the logs a bit to keep the temperature warm. Just don’t be needy about it.

She's already closed him out, so it's iffy to begin with. Hitting her up with useless texts or messages are pointless. Besides, they both said they'd contact each other if something changes. I'd double book just in case. However, chasing would be what the AFC would do. OP, don't do this. You want her mind to wonder; if she's still seeing you next week. Less communication is more.

 

[flowtheory]

She's already closed him out, so it's iffy to begin with. Hitting her up with useless texts or messages are pointless. Besides, they both said they'd contact each other if something changes. I'd double book just in case. However, chasing would be what the AFC would do. OP, don't do this. You want her mind to wonder; if she's still seeing you next week. Less communication is more.

Can still be in contact whilemnot being an AFC. It’s more about not wasting ones own time.
I agree usuallynoncethe date is set, it’s set! No contact if it’s about 2-4 days away. But in his case it’d be over a week. Chances are higher that she will forget about him if she’s talking with other men

 

[R.U.G.]

Can still be in contact whilemnot being an AFC. It’s more about not wasting ones own time.
I agree usuallynoncethe date is set, it’s set! No contact if it’s about 2-4 days away. But in his case it’d be over a week. Chances are higher that she will forget about him if she’s talking with other men

Perhaps. It seems it was moving fast from bumble > text in a day or so. Where the OP pushed his luck is asking her out on next week. I gather it's because she said she was not feeling well so that knocked out the weekend. However, I would had come back and said what day is good for you? It's kinda hard to go after a date when a woman has a cold. I remember last year I was seeing a woman who said she just got over a cold and I developed strep throat from that kiss. A cold or flu is contagious for 2 weeks. It wasn't a fun two weeks with strep for me. I assume that is why he wanted to give some breathing room.

On the AMS side, he would say it made him stand out. Like he has other options and he's busy this weekend. AMS always sets up dates a week in advance and doesn't confirm. I will also agree to this that it works. No woman has ever cancelled on me when I scheduled a week in advance and didn't confirm. They've always confirmed with me. Is it risky, a bit, but again, a man wants to do the opposite of what others are doing. You don't think others she set dates with are contacting her every few days or so? A man with options doesn't run after women. Plain and simple. I would had said good just if she didn't close him out, so it's up in the air. I'd set a backup just in case. If it falls through, tell the woman you had something come up and can you reschedule. Chances are, that would raise that woman's interest as well.

Many ways to spin something. The one who cares the least is the one who past the power (source: The Rational Male). For all we know, this can be a sh!t test from her. In the beginning, they come fast and hard with some women.

 

[flowtheory]

Perhaps. It seems it was moving fast from bumble > text in a day or so. Where the OP pushed his luck is asking her out on next week. I gather it's because she said she was not feeling well so that knocked out the weekend. However, I would had come back and said what day is good for you? It's kinda hard to go after a date when a woman has a cold. I remember last year I was seeing a woman who said she just got over a cold and I developed strep throat from that kiss. A cold or flu is contagious for 2 weeks. It wasn't a fun two weeks with strep for me. I assume that is why he wanted to give some breathing room.

On the AMS side, he would say it made him stand out. Like he has other options and he's busy this weekend. AMS always sets up dates a week in advance and doesn't confirm. I will also agree to this that it works. No woman has ever cancelled on me when I scheduled a week in advance and didn't confirm. They've always confirmed with me. Is it risky, a bit, but again, a man wants to do the opposite of what others are doing. You don't think others she set dates with are contacting her every few days or so? A man with options doesn't run after women. Plain and simple. I would had said good just if she didn't close him out, so it's up in the air. I'd set a backup just in case. If it falls through, tell the woman you had something come up and can you reschedule. Chances are, that would raise that woman's interest as well.

Many ways to spin something. The one who cares the least is the one who past the power (source: The Rational Male). For all we know, this can be a sh!t test from her. In the beginning, they come fast and hard with some women.

I can agree. I also just believe 1 full week is too long. Even though I’ve done this and have had the woman confirm.

 

[R.U.G.]

I can agree. I also just believe 1 full week is too long. Even though I’ve done this and have had the woman confirm.

All about frame my friend. Switch it around.. Women do not want a man without options. If a bro is contacting her just after a few bumble messages and a text, shows he's needy and desperate (I.E. - no options). It's best to play it cool and stay the course. Never, ever chase a woman.. Especially one you've not even met yet. Now, once you meet the woman, you need to chase a bit like a push and pull. You always want to have them guessing about you. She's not going to forget unless she's already done so. He would stand out more by going against the norm and stay NC.

Last February I was dating this woman and I didn't contact her to confirm, ever. She contacted me the day of confirming we were still on. She asked during the date, why didn't you contact me to confirm? My reply was my offer to meet you and set the date was my confirmation. If I needed to cancel, I would had told you. She said that's so different that what guys normally do. Usually, they're hounding me every few days making sure we're still on. I just said, we're here, aren't we, with a smirk? It's all how a person plays it. That is all. Never stress. Never worry. It's part of the game.

 

[flowtheory]

All about frame my friend. Switch it around.. Women do not want a man without options. If a bro is contacting her just after a few bumble messages and a text, shows he's needy and desperate (I.E. - no options). It's best to play it cool and stay the course. Never, ever chase a woman.. Especially one you've not even met yet. Now, once you meet the woman, you need to chase a bit like a push and pull. You always want to have them guessing about you. She's not going to forget unless she's already done so. He would stand out more by going against the norm and stay NC.

Last February I was dating this woman and I didn't contact her to confirm, ever. She contacted me the day of confirming we were still on. She asked during the date, why didn't you contact me to confirm? My reply was my offer to meet you and set the date was my confirmation. If I needed to cancel, I would had told you. She said that's so different that what guys normally do. Usually, they're hounding me every few days making sure we're still on. I just said, we're here, aren't we, with a smirk? It's all how a person plays it. That is all. Never stress. Never worry. It's part of the game.

But those guys she stated were ‘hounding’ her. Confirming thet were still on. One doesn’t even have to do that. Nothing wrong with just sending a message about something going on to create a little excitement.

I also agree with once the date is set, just leave it. but a couple messages here and there isn’t going to break frame or be considered needy or weak.

 

[R.U.G.]

But those guys she stated were ‘hounding’ her. Confirming thet were still on. One doesn’t even have to do that. Nothing wrong with just sending a message about something going on to create a little excitement.

I also agree with once the date is set, just leave it. but a couple messages here and there isn’t going to break frame or be considered needy or weak.

Really depends. I don't care for the closing of the match, so that is the only thing that would hold me back if it was me. Since they've never met, how is she to know who he is? Unless she d/led his pic and/or found him on social media. Very strange.

 

[flowtheory]

Really depends. I don't care for the closing of the match, so that is the only thing that would hold me back if it was me. Since they've never met, how is she to know who he is? Unless she d/led his pic and/or found him on social media. Very strange.

True. She could have deleted the app though

 

[StrayCat]

Goin got play it by ear. I used to reach out a day or two before, that's when they've had something come up or something. I am thinking it's best to let the chips fall where they may.

 

[R.U.G.]

True. She could have deleted the app though

Women rarely delete apps. If a woman wanted to get serious with a bro, then she'd texted she needs to reschedule and then become Casper.

Goin got play it by ear. I used to reach out a day or two before, that's when they've had something come up or something. I am thinking it's best to let the chips fall where they may.

Tough call. I still think you should line another woman up to take her place, just in case.

 

[R.U.G.]

@StrayCat, I have a better idea. Text her about 15 minutes prior to the meet and say you're running a bit late and you'll be there 15 minutes later. Blame it on traffic or something. See how she responds. Now, if she confirms prior, then don't do this. You'll get your answer one way or another w/o having to show up with your d!ck in your hand. Obviously, if she declines or cancels, don't overreact. Just say, ok, if you want to meet up again in the future, LMK. Then the onus is on her. Always best for the woman to chase the man, not reverse.

 

[Trump]

I am working on younger women in their 20's and early 30's. This one swiped right on me a few days ago and I opened communication as well. We went back and forth for 3 or 4 times and I asked for her number and if she'd like to meet for a drink. She replied absolutely and gave me her cellphone on Wednesday. I reached out Thursday

When you asked for the drink, you shoud have nailed a date and time RIGHT THERE. To go back 24 hours later and ask for a drink is way too risky. You are assuming because she is in love with you Wednesday, she cares you are dead or alive Thursday. It’s never the case. She could have been pregnant by the time you asked her on Thursday.

I reached out Thursday and and she was down with a cold. I suggested we meet next Friday at a pub we both know, she agreed. I told her see you then. If anything changes, let me know and feel better. She said you too and see you then.

“Hi younger women, it’s me from Bumble. We spoke Wednesday. How are you doing?”
“Not great. I think I’m coming down with a cold.”
“Oh that’s nice. Let’s meet Friday at the pub we both know.”
“Uh ok.”
“If anything changes, let me know. And feel better. Get rid of that nasty cold before we meet at the pub.”
“Uh Ok. See you then.”


Come on bro, really? ‘Coming down with a cold’ does not mean “I’m dying to give in to my Basic Instincts and have sex with you as soon as possible.”

I logged in this morning to bumble while having some breakfast, and I noticed that her match was closed out. Does this mean we're prob. not going to meet for drinks next Friday?

Not necessarily.

This happened before with another woman, be we met up and she said you had my number, there wasn't a need to keep the bumble connection open.

Lol. There was no reason to close the connection either.

I would have just said “Oh, ok, I wanted to meet you for a drink this week but let’s arrange another time when you feel better.”

You already asked for a drink and she said “absolutely” to the drink. Now by saying she has a cold, she has given herself an out. Don’t give her that opportunity. Leave the ball in her court to counter when she is feeling 100% and wants to meet you.

 

[R.U.G.]

When you asked for the drink, you shoud have nailed a date and time RIGHT THERE. To go back 24 hours later and ask for a drink is way too risky. You are assuming because she is in love with you Wednesday, she cares you are dead or alive Thursday. It’s never the case. She could have been pregnant by the time you asked her on Thursday.



“Hi younger women, it’s me from Bumble. We spoke Wednesday. How are you doing?”
“Not great. I think I’m coming down with a cold.”
“Oh that’s nice. Let’s meet Friday at the pub we both know.”
“Uh ok.”
“If anything changes, let me know. And feel better. Get rid of that nasty cold before we meet at the pub.”
“Uh Ok. See you then.”


Come on bro, really? ‘Coming down with a cold’ does not mean “I’m dying to give in to my Basic Instincts and have sex with you as soon as possible.”



Not necessarily.



Lol. There was no reason to close the connection either.

I would have just said “Oh, ok, I wanted to meet you for a drink this week but let’s arrange another time when you feel better.”

You already asked for a drink and she said “absolutely” to the drink. Now by saying she has a cold, she has given herself an out. Don’t give her that opportunity. Leave the ball in her court to counter when she is feeling 100% and wants to meet you.

Trump makes some valid arguments. A+