Surprising plate with weekend trip

[BeTheChange]

Finally at stage in my life where I have the means to travel regularly without flinching at the costs. It's my main plate's birthday coming up soon and I've made it a new year's resolution to get away from home once a month so killing two birds with one stone.

What's the best way to execute the gift of a weekend trip abroad with finesse?

a) Tell her before her birthday so she has time to prepare (pack bags, plan trip and get excited) and fly out on her birthday

b) Tell her on her birthday but book the trip after her birthday so she has time to prepare. Downside to this is the trip itself won't be on her birthday.

c) Just give her the good news on her birthday and hope for a burst of spontaneity (she travels on the same day she gets the news)


FYI this chick is a planner/organizer rather than the spontaneous type so I'm thinking (a) or (b) are probably the better options.

 

[BeExcellent]

Selection d.) Enlist the help of friends who know her to pack for her or set up a trip so she packs and prepares to travel. Then when the day of travel comes the friend heads her to the airport where you are already waiting with the surprise destination.

THAT is how you pull off a surprise like this with finesse, class and panache.

I am assuming that as a main plate she has some status where you have met people from her social circle or family whose help you can enlist. Bonus: you also impress her friends as well, which will help boost your status in her eyes.

 

[The Duke]

hmm.......all about her. More female centric thinking.

 

[BeTheChange]

Selection d.) Enlist the help of friends who know her to pack for her or set up a trip so she packs and prepares to travel. Then when the day of travel comes the friend heads her to the airport where you are already waiting with the surprise destination.

THAT is how you pull off a surprise like this with finesse, class and panache.

I am assuming that as a main plate she has some status where you have met people from her social circle or family whose help you can enlist. Bonus: you also impress her friends as well, which will help boost your status in her eyes.

That's a great idea BE but difficult as I don't know her friends too well nor have their contact details. Also haven't met her family either (they don't live in the country or even speak English!).

 

[Billtx49]

b) The trip is the gift, if she doesn’t agree to go you’re safe with the later booking plan…
Btw, Women always want to be prepared ahead of an event…

 

[Roober]

Just buy two tickets, far enough out to give her an opportunity to plan/adjust her schedule. One week would work, two weeks definitely works. If you are buying her a trip, its obvious that you are semi-serious, more than a plate, and should have a decent grasp of her schedule. Scheduling a vacation around her schedule shouldn't be an issue.

You could even just tell her when and where you guys are going, then buy the tickets after she confirms. There is typically a 14-day window to when airline prices increase, and most hotels, etc. can be booked last minute. She doesn't need all the details as it's your vacation, and she is coming along. If she wants to see something specific, she will speak up.

She will only stay a "planner" if you let her. And if you're more spontaneous, I suggest sticking to what works for you, not letting her determine the way which you plan a vacation together. The key is that you stay true to your values, while considering hers.

If you know her schedule, planning a vacation is pretty simple. You can even ask questions to ascertain if she has any major plans coming up.

 

[Mazer]

I wouldn’t schedule anything for the weekend of her birthday unless you know for sure she has nothing going on. She has most likely set up birthday plans with friends or family for the weekend, I would plan it for the following weekend or the next. My advice is plan a trip to a place you would like to visit and she will enjoy as well. Her coming along is a bonus.

 

[marmel75]

Sounds like a lot of work to go through for a plate.

 

[BeTheChange]

Sounds like a lot of work to go through for a plate.

If spending $100 on an extra plane ticket to a place you are visiting anyway is "work" then you need to re-evaluate your life or improve your income potential.

There's a scene in the first few episodes of House of Cards that always strikes a chord. Meechum, Frank Underwood's security guard is suspended for firing a gun in the street. In spite of his incompetent act, Frank makes a call to Meechum's boss in order to rehire him. His logic:

"It requires very little of me and will mean the world to him. It's a very inexpensive investment."

Think.

Selective generosity is an incredible tool in the art of both power and seduction.

 

[17 shots]

If spending $100 on an extra plane ticket to a place you are visiting anyway is "work" then you need to re-evaluate your life or improve your income potential.

There's a scene in the first few episodes of House of Cards that always strikes a chord. Meechum, Frank Underwood's security guard is suspended for firing a gun in the street. In spite of his incompetent act, Frank makes a call to Meechum's boss in order to rehire him. His logic:

"It requires very little of me and will mean the world to him. It's a very inexpensive investment."

Think.

Selective generosity is an incredible tool in the art of both power and seduction.

where are you getting $100 plane tickets... I want in

 

[marmel75]

If spending $100 on an extra plane ticket to a place you are visiting anyway is "work" then you need to re-evaluate your life or improve your income potential.

There's a scene in the first few episodes of House of Cards that always strikes a chord. Meechum, Frank Underwood's security guard is suspended for firing a gun in the street. In spite of his incompetent act, Frank makes a call to Meechum's boss in order to rehire him. His logic:

"It requires very little of me and will mean the world to him. It's a very inexpensive investment."

Think.

Selective generosity is an incredible tool in the art of both power and seduction.

I'm a software engineer. Trust me I'm paid well. The point I'm making is this is something you do with a girlfriend not a plate.

 

[BeTheChange]

where are you getting $100 plane tickets... I want in

I live in Europe so country to country flights are pretty cheap (e.g. France to Germany)

I'm a software engineer. Trust me I'm paid well. The point I'm making is this is something you do with a girlfriend not a plate.

Of course you are. And with half of your income going to your ex wife presumably? This is something you do with a girlfriend. The point I'm making is taking a weekend trip away with someone doesn't constitute a major expense and is a slight step up from paying for a meal or drink. Each to their own.

 

[marmel75]

I live in Europe so country to country flights are pretty cheap (e.g. France to Germany)



Of course you are. And with half of your income going to your ex wife presumably? This is something you do with a girlfriend. The point I'm making is taking a weekend trip away with someone doesn't constitute a major expense and is a slight step up from paying for a meal or drink. Each to their own.

Not an ex bro still married. Its not about the expense its more about what it conveys to her.

 

[Roober]

Not an ex bro still married. Its not about the expense its more about what it conveys to her.

It's pointless. Contradictory feedback will be written off as nonsense when a man cant see beyond his own nose...

 

[HankHill]

I think everyone may have a different definition of a plate. Also, calling a woman a plate is seen as something macho on SS so she might even be the only girl, may be even a gf. Regardless if he wants to take a woman to another country with him and bone her there (to feel like a rockstar) and it costs no more than the cost of a good restaurant I don't see the big deal as long as it's done with the right frame - gf/plate etc doesn't mater.

As to the question asked, the problem is you don't know what other plans she already has for her bday so I wouldn't do it on her bday. You also have the possibility of her turning it down if she's not exclusive. I'd tell her you are taking her some place for her bday and it requires her packing her bags for the weekend of Jan 12th etc and that's all. It can be a weekend before or after her actual bday.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Trips are for wives and serious girlfriends. No exceptions.

 

[BeTheChange]

I think everyone may have a different definition of a plate. Also, calling a woman a plate is seen as something macho on SS so she might even be the only girl, may be even a gf. Regardless if he wants to take a woman to another country with him and bone her there (to feel like a rockstar) and it costs no more than the cost of a good restaurant I don't see the big deal as long as it's done with the right frame - gf/plate etc doesn't mater.

Exactly. Glad someone gets it. Threads like this definitely separate the experienced (frame is everything) from the incels (black and white thinking, arbitrary rules with no exceptions, etc).

She's the main plate at the moment but I'm casually dating one other. Have no intention of being committal (on paper) with anyone at the moment and probably for the rest of 2019. At that pivotal SMV crossroad that Rollo mentions in his SMV graph. Would be silly to get tied down at this point. I took a different girl to Dubai a few years ago. And by "took" I mean the company I previously worked for paid for my flight, hotel and other expenses out there for a week since I was officially there to see clients.

She paid for her flight and got the benefit of a "free" hotel and cool guy to hang out with. I got the benefit of not having to worry about planning stuff to do (that was her job) and having a sexy HB to tour the city with on the weekend and fvck when I came back from work. Honestly I had a blast out there! And she returned the favour by letting me crash at her place when I visited the states later that year.

As to the question asked, the problem is you don't know what other plans she already has for her bday so I wouldn't do it on her bday. You also have the possibility of her turning it down if she's not exclusive. I'd tell her you are taking her some place for her bday and it requires her packing her bags for the weekend of Jan 12th etc and that's all. It can be a weekend before or after her actual bday.

Told her I'm taking her away for her birthday. She's cool with it. Nicely done.

 

[HankHill]

Cool man, enjoy your trip!

At that pivotal SMV crossroad that Rollo mentions in his SMV graph.

I didn't read Rollo, I'm curious what he says the pivotal SMV is?

 

[Spaz]

Sounds more like u r the plate...

No need for fancy shiet. I've invited women along for trips, just mention you're going to xyz and ask if she wants to tag along.

If she's reluctant, shrug ur shoulders and say it's cool I'll just invite someone else - she'll change her mind by then.

 

[BeExcellent]

That's a great idea BE but difficult as I don't know her friends too well nor have their contact details. Also haven't met her family either (they don't live in the country or even speak English!).

Ok I get it. The other thing you can do along those lines is tell her she has plans that weekend but don't tell her what they are. That way you in effect reserve her time for your adventure.

If she's a plan ahead type? Tell her she's busy for the weekend and that further instructions are forthcoming at noon that Friday (or whatever makes sense.)

That way you give her notice so she can prepare to travel but you retain the surprise and the mystery of the actual trip.

It has the added benefit of giving her something to look forward to and daydream about.

Chicks love that. Trust me.