Starting to see some distance, or it could just be my thinking

[lamath]

Understood and that is what I'm going to do.




I did say twice I'd like to see you, once this week and once last. She said she's busy last week for the assignment she's doing. I've told you already this week what she said so far. How many times can I say, I'd like to see you? I feel like a fool in doing in repeating on and on. I shouldn't have to ask to see a lady I am dating. If you cannot fit 1 hour or 2 in a week when you're 15 minutes away, then something is wrong. Now, obviously, I am not going to ask, is something wrong? As we all know, the response and it's a means to an end.

Seems like you know what to do.

Men hitting on on her is going to her head thats what i think

 

[flowtheory]

It's too early in dating for you to be this entitled to her support this early. Likewise, virtually all women will withdraw at SOME point during the first 3-6 months of dating, occasionally a pure sh1t test too (have had this admitted to me).

Do not react with the needy passive aggressive comments to intend to make. Women always see through passive aggressive behavior and really despise it as feminine. Unfortunately the cognitive dissonance of trying to bottle things up to be masculine is a recipe for this but you have to be firm.

Nowpulls this stuff a year in, different story.

Having said that, obviously she is not the nurturing type or some unicorn, just sort of the basic average woman. No loss if she disappears entirely.

Good post.

Why do women pull away as a sh!t test during the first 3-6 months?

 

[AJ84]

Understood and that is what I'm going to do.




I did say twice I'd like to see you, once this week and once last. She said she's busy last week for the assignment she's doing. I've told you already this week what she said so far. How many times can I say, I'd like to see you? I feel like a fool in doing in repeating on and on. I shouldn't have to ask to see a lady I am dating. If you cannot fit 1 hour or 2 in a week when you're 15 minutes away, then something is wrong. Now, obviously, I am not going to ask, is something wrong? As we all know, the response and it's a means to an end.

My apologies I’m going by the situation with the kidney stones and how you would of liked to see her at present.

 

[lamath]

My apologies I’m going by the situation with the kidney stones and how you would of liked to see her at present.

Its sad that things in a relationship can go south that fast for no apparent reason.
Idk if this os hypergamy but to me it lacks integrity and loyalty

I seriously think that orbiters are the reason for it

 

[flowtheory]

Its sad that things in a relationship can go south that fast for no apparent reason.
Idk if this os hypergamy but to me it lacks integrity and loyalty

I seriously think that orbiters are the reason for it

Happens all the time. This is the lust stage slowly coming to a close... her interest could have never been super high to begin with for a long term relationship; Christmas is near, end of the year, many re-examine this time of the year.

 

[flowtheory]

Another guy to "test" her emotions, another guy for fun or a better option, or as a test to see if you are insecure and needy, tests your congruence.

Interestingggg

 

[flowtheory]

Another guy to "test" her emotions, another guy for fun or a better option, or as a test to see if you are insecure and needy, tests your congruence.

Do you think they would still do that if they had high interest?
Seems very risky to entertain other men to see if there are better fish out there while being with a great guy..

 

[lamath]

I think a man need to ask himself this question
Is this women good enough for you.
Imo she is not.

 

[HankHill]

@RickTheToad while she has sh!t tested you in the past I'm almost positive this is NOT a sh!t test. This is the type of person she is and after several months I would've expected more from her too if she wanted to be my gf. I like the caring girly-girl types. Me? I'd just treat her like a plate and nothing more.

 

[lamath]

@RickTheToad while she has sh!t tested you in the past I'm almost positive this is NOT a sh!t test. This is the type of a person she is and after several months I would've expected more from her too if she wanted to be my gf. I like the caring girly-girl types. Me? I'd just treat her like a plate and nothing more.

Demote her to plate

 

[flowtheory]

The high interest will still entertain but not be as reckless with the distance for fear of losing you, they will be paranoid you will find someone else. I had high interest test me like this before though.

So women will always entertain other men? Even in the same vicinity as you? To see how you will handle yourself?

 

[RickTheToad]

They called in better pain killers, I am not is as much pain now. I do not plan to do or say anything. I think a lot is the pain talking, but I have 30 pills of Vicodin, so I'm in a better place. It will be what it will be. Not going to overreact.

 

[RickTheToad]

So women will always entertain other men? Even in the same vicinity as you? To see how you will handle yourself?

Most always look for upgrades. When the chips are down, the one's who stick by you are the rare ones. I've found in the past that no emotional reaction is the best method. I may piss and moan here, but when the pain subsided a bit I was able to regain my composure. When you show you don't give a fvck, that is usually best. I know this, but the pain got the better of me over the past few days. Even I have my limits on how much pain I can absorb and still have a clear head.

 

[AJ84]

Its sad that things in a relationship can go south that fast for no apparent reason.
Idk if this os hypergamy but to me it lacks integrity and loyalty

I seriously think that orbiters are the reason for it

I guess I’m just not seeing where the ball dropped that far. A bit of disappointment, but I can tell you if you demote women as plates for something like this, you will only ever have plates.
People will disappoint you. Frame doesn’t prevent that from happening, it just shapes how you react to it.
I can understand if OP’s gf did something purposefully insensitive like deciding to go off on a weekend booze holiday with her friends when she could see him instead, or said she couldn’t meet with him then he found her posting stuff on Facebook about her shopping spree or her girlfriend brunch etc.

Could she of spent a bit of time? Yes. But he did say she 1) started an apprenticeship and 2) is remodeling something and there was a flood.
Oh and 3) she did offer to help him, even if it wasn’t in the way that he needed.

It would be nice if she went over to see him, of course. Maybe she is someone who can’t sort out how to manage time around certain things and make time to see others when she’s got sh*t going on, I don’t know. Maybe she can’t handle being around someone in pain, maybe she doesn’t know how to deal with it. None of the above is his problem of course. Who knows.
What I do know, based on what he posted, is that she doesn’t seem to be some entitled princess with a self absorbed approach to dating.

 

[RickTheToad]

Women fall in love like 9 months in, he expects her to waste her free time nursing him on month 4? It's so strange.

Nurse? No. Not even close. Stopping by when she's 7 minutes away... I really do not think that is much to ask. Again, maybe it's me.

 

[RickTheToad]

but your expectations are naive

Agree with everything but this part. Let's just agree to disagree on this part above, professor.

 

[HankHill]

Women fall in love like 9 months in, he expects her to waste her free time nursing him on month 4? It's so strange.

Wut? Within the first 1-4 months the lust/infatuation is at its peak and they can't help but want to get close to you as quickly as possible so these things are perfect opportunities for them to show how caring they are. Even 2 months of regular dating is plenty to show concern and offer to bring food or help etc IF they want to be seen as a long term prospect.

On top of that let's not forget she lives only 10mins from him so I'm sure she can spare 20 mins from her 'extremely busy' schedule for a guy she expects to be in a relationship with...unless she doesn't. She's already tried to create jealousy and drama a few times and the whole thing around your profile being active etc about a month ago. It's not like one single occurrence, it's a pattern of bad behavior. As I said before she ain't the type of woman you want for a LTR, plate material only.

 

[The Diver]

OP, I did that operation. Stop making such a big deal out of it.
Yes, the pain bf the operation is a killer, but the operation is under general anesthetic, and you won't feel anything. After that, you'll have a night recovery, and then they will send you home with a catheter in your penis. You'll return to the hospital after a week or so to pull the catheter out.( not under anesthetic and 5 seconds painful.)
Yes, it's not pleasant, but I think you are concern yourself too much.. you're not going for heart surgery. kidney stone operation it pretty common one.
feel well.

 

[RickTheToad]

OP, I did that operation. Stop making such a big deal out of it.
Yes, the pain bf the operation is a killer, but the operation is under general anesthetic, and you won't feel anything. After that, you'll have a night recovery, and then they will send you home with a catheter in your penis. You'll return to the hospital after a week or so to pull the catheter out.( not under anesthetic and 5 seconds painful.)
Yes, it's not pleasant, but I think you are concern yourself too much.. you're not going for heart surgery. kidney stone operation it pretty common one.
feel well.

They're not going through the penis dude.

 

[The Diver]

They're not going through the penis dude.

From my understanding, you are not allowing them to go through your penis, and therefore they will cut you open to reach your kidneys, No?
Sounds to me much more complicated and risky, but this is your body ,,,,,,