Dealing with suspected cheating

[Spaz]

Hahaha

 

[Ranger]

A little off topic but if someone called my mother a wh0re I wouldn’t give a fvck and would just walk away because I know she isn’t one..

I think that’s why promiscuous women go ballistic when you call them a slvt when you get really pissed off.. it’s because deep down the truth really hurts.

It doesn’t matter if she is or isn’t Music-Czar. Truly. Not to me.
I do think that sometimes when bad girls (good girls the day before) are found out the cat is out of the bag.

 

[Spaz]

Like I said some can take it in, some can't.

And then they b1tch for years on end abt women lol

Be the driver. Women are the passengers, let them jostle to be at the front seats.

Don't be the passenger on the bus or you'd always end up trying to get to the front row seats. Jostling with other men with the same narratives, a vicious circle where it's women actually driving.

Easier said then done. Takes a lot of work to be the driver.

But 1st you must realise that you were born to be in the driver seat. That's what nature intended for you. That's your purpose.

If you make a wrong turn and lose some passengers along the way, would it be logical to blame the passenger for changing buses?

 

[cutthecrapdammit]

Those are all nice pie in the sky type of advice, did you get that from a hallmark card?

Number one, what does he hope to learn? Yes, I let him f*ck me right in the a$$. Hmm boy, good stuff to have that image rolling around in your head. No recovering from that, no matter how much booze or therapy you goto. You're always going to have that image of her in your head as long as you are together.

Two, what is there to recover? Yep, she cheated, great, now let's fix this mess? Are you serious? What is there to fix? Even if you could "fix" it, how could you ever trust her. Sorry honey, this is going wrong. Oh, oh, she might cheat again. Gee, she's been late at work all this week, I wonder if anything is going on. I mean, I could continue, but why? You know he can't trust her anymore, he knows he can't trust her anymore and she knows he doesn't trust her anymore, what else is there to say?

Finally, how do you get past being second fiddle? Here you are, investing in the relationship. Going to work, spending time with her, if there are kids, being a great parent. Probably very little time for the relationship but somehow, someway, she found time to go out and get her a$$ pounded. Nope, no going back from being friend zoned from your own wife, significant other.

This says it all......my decision rests on knowing if it did or didn't happen.

 

[cutthecrapdammit]

What happened to the OP of this thread? No response from him yet.

-Augustus-

Busy working,i have a business, kids, lifting, etc. etc. I read the first replies day of posting and didn't find much of value......fast forward to today and finding some good posts.

 

[marvinlfloresq]

LOL, but you believe in "women's intuition" I bet?

Instinct is what has kept animals and people alive and able to pass on their genes.

Logic is an additional advantage used to assist in that process.

WHAT

I completely understand your reasoning. This is faulty thinking in the world of women.
In order to make a good decision one would need enough information to actually make an assessment. Yeah I probably picked the wrong post for that reply.

There are men all over this forum who wished they had followed their instincts.
No one said dump your wife. Lol. I didn’t. I said trust your instincts. In fact I would advise against it. I didn’t realize that “Trust your instincts” meant kick your wife to the curb. That is so binary thinking. Why would you jump all the way to the wide extreme? That’s not being a Rational Male. That’s like something a woman would say. No offense intended but it really is rather feminine.

Trust your instincts means become a better man and protect yourself. You will NEVER have evidence. The getting her drunk idea is rather stupid. Women are never that stupid. So first off, you won’t know when she’s going if she does. It will be a blind side. She may even change up her approach so you are calmed down again when she springs it, if she’s going to.
She already has your assets. Thinking she doesn’t isn’t being a Rational Male.
“There is no upside to marriage.” Rollo Tomassi

In my opinion...she belongs under competition. She should have to compete now. She finally took her man as a lesser man. Without competition anxiety there is no solution. That doesn’t mean cheat. That means that she should know that she can and will be replaced at the drop of a hat.

But what do I know. I only have four children and two houses I built with my own hands. Yep. Don’t know Jack. Never been through any of that. (Eye roll)

oh, a love letter.

I completely understand your reasoning. This is faulty thinking in the world of women.
In order to make a good decision one would need enough information to actually make an assessment. Yeah I probably picked the wrong post for that reply.

There are men all over this forum who wished they had followed their instincts.
No one said dump your wife. Lol. I didn’t. I said trust your instincts. In fact I would advise against it. I didn’t realize that “Trust your instincts” meant kick your wife to the curb. That is so binary thinking. Why would you jump all the way to the wide extreme? That’s not being a Rational Male. That’s like something a woman would say. No offense intended but it really is rather feminine.

Trust your instincts means become a better man and protect yourself. You will NEVER have evidence. The getting her drunk idea is rather stupid. Women are never that stupid. So first off, you won’t know when she’s going if she does. It will be a blind side. She may even change up her approach so you are calmed down again when she springs it, if she’s going to.
She already has your assets. Thinking she doesn’t isn’t being a Rational Male.
“There is no upside to marriage.” Rollo Tomassi

In my opinion...she belongs under competition. She should have to compete now. She finally took her man as a lesser man. Without competition anxiety there is no solution. That doesn’t mean cheat. That means that she should know that she can and will be replaced at the drop of a hat.

But what do I know. I only have four children and two houses I built with my own hands. Yep. Don’t know Jack. Never been through any of that. (Eye roll)

Ranger, "no" you do not understand my reasoning.

Go back to building houses, * please. Stop writing love letters to me. Btw, op, excuse me, some people are easily hurt by strangers on forums.

Get some counseling & time of work. Peace. Best of luck, this is not the place to seek opinions.

 

[marvinlfloresq]

LMAO, Not one comment is here to help the op. Gentlemen, you guys are so ****ing out of it, this is the last place to look for advice or opinions. He's Probably having sex with her right now!

Go get some air people. Jaja

 

[marvinlfloresq]

If counseling "worked" for you, that's great. No matter how you slice it, that's extremely emasculating, bottom line. If you can take being emasculated from your own "wife" and continue down the road with her, good for you. I don't see many self respecting men taking being cucked from their own wives. You can get counseling for that but honestly, unless he's f*cking chicks left, right and center or beating the crap out of her, there's not much reason for her to be out f*cking other guys. It takes both sides to make a marriage work, can't simply shift to blaming him because she cheated, that's dumb.

Assets, yep, that's a reason to stay together while your "wife" is gulping down some other guy's c*ck. Good advice. Repeat the mistake? Good god no man, that's when you stay single and have fun instead of living in an artificial hell created for you by someone you are supposed to be able to trust. I've lived through cheating and no, not interested in trying to "fix" something like that.

To be clear, you have to have verifiable proof before you start accusing but if he does get it, time to move on. She forgot to pick up the dry cleaning? Fixable. She forgot to pick up milk after work? Fixable. She tells you on a bad day to go f*ck yourself? Fixable, as long as it not a frequent type of thing. She rides some other guy's c*ck? Dude, not fixable, no matter how much you'd like to advise him to do so, although I'm not sure why.

Another love letter to me.


I never said I was married. Nor to keep a cheating wife. Your "comprehensive" skills are admirable. Cheers. lol

 

[marvinlfloresq]

If counseling "worked" for you, that's great. No matter how you slice it, that's extremely emasculating, bottom line. If you can take being emasculated from your own "wife" and continue down the road with her, good for you. I don't see many self respecting men taking being cucked from their own wives. You can get counseling for that but honestly, unless he's f*cking chicks left, right and center or beating the crap out of her, there's not much reason for her to be out f*cking other guys. It takes both sides to make a marriage work, can't simply shift to blaming him because she cheated, that's dumb.

Assets, yep, that's a reason to stay together while your "wife" is gulping down some other guy's c*ck. Good advice. Repeat the mistake? Good god no man, that's when you stay single and have fun instead of living in an artificial hell created for you by someone you are supposed to be able to trust. I've lived through cheating and no, not interested in trying to "fix" something like that.

To be clear, you have to have verifiable proof before you start accusing but if he does get it, time to move on. She forgot to pick up the dry cleaning? Fixable. She forgot to pick up milk after work? Fixable. She tells you on a bad day to go f*ck yourself? Fixable, as long as it not a frequent type of thing. She rides some other guy's c*ck? Dude, not fixable, no matter how much you'd like to advise him to do so, although I'm not sure why.

Another love letter to me.


I never said I was married. Nor to keep a cheating wife. Your "comprehensive" skills are admirable. Cheers.

 

[Spaz]

He forgave her and counselled her not to do it again.

Then poured her some wine, trying his best to seduce her back into loving him.

The next day he went for therapy, seeking advice from someone who wants him to be a repeat customer.

Did I miss something out ?

 

[Augustus_McCrae]

Busy working,i have a business, kids, lifting, etc. etc. I read the first replies day of posting and didn't find much of value......fast forward to today and finding some good posts.

If you actually want some advice, you need to give some information:

Why do you think she was cheating? How long married? Kids? Who makes more money?

-Augustus-

 

[KarmaSutra]

I often speak about the "little man" who lives in your gut. He will NEVER lie to you. When he kicks around so badly you feel it in the bottom of your sac, you have to acknowledge the truth of the matter: she cheated. But, it's not your burden to bear. The choice was hers. The memory of that d!ck deep in her guts is hers. The choice to lie and manipulate and disregard you are all her doing. So you allow her to revel in that sh!t she stirred-up. The trick is having the want to listen to him. Instinct isn't enough. You have to consider the aspect variables; emotions, logistics, looking yourself honestly in a mirror. All of these things work seamlessly when you're cornered and need to make a life-decision.

My ex-wife took a d!ickin' from a twenty-three old redneck while we were married. She suffered the consequences of that action, and she still regrets it. Why? Because I gave her no choice regarding my choice to wipe my a$$ of her. It's extremely freeing to have the testicular fortitude to walk away, to start anew. That was thirteen years ago, when I found this place.

The men here aided in my growth as a confident dude. A dude who can look a woman in the eye and tell her-without blinking-"No."

 

[btownbuck2012]

Because they don't have a nurturing instinct towards their male protector unless instilled by society. They actively detest weakness unless socialized. Meanwhile, male protective instinct is natural. Female neediness in waif format is literally attractive to men.

It’s funny how such a weak being, literally everything about them other than p$ssy power, can be so unaccepting and intolerant of that quality in a man.

I mean really think about the modern woman. What value does she have in 2018 other than her p$ssy?

 

[cutthecrapdammit]

If you actually want some advice, you need to give some information:

Why do you think she was cheating? How long married? Kids? Who makes more money?

-Augustus-

I think she was/is cheating due to behavioral changes- very guarded phone, occasionally i'd wake up middle of night and she be on phone, less sex than normal/less desire when we did, then when she started to work out/lose weight - I just woke up to the reality then...……….married a year, together 5+...…………..no kids, but each of us has kids from prior marriages...………….I made more in beginning and do now, but there was aperiod during business start up where she made more.

 

[HankHill]

It’s funny how such a weak being, literally everything about them other than p$ssy power, can be so unaccepting and intolerant of that quality in a man.

I mean really think about the modern woman. What value does she have in 2018 other than her p$ssy?

I'm with you bro but I ask the same question in reverse...what does a woman need from a man in 2018? They usually have decent education, job/career, own their own places, travel with their girlfriends...have plenty of orbiters and the pvssy power. No wonder they're intolerant of most guys and all feel like they should be with Chads.

 

[Augustus_McCrae]

I think she was/is cheating due to behavioral changes- very guarded phone, occasionally i'd wake up middle of night and she be on phone, less sex than normal/less desire when we did, then when she started to work out/lose weight - I just woke up to the reality then...……….married a year, together 5+...…………..no kids, but each of us has kids from prior marriages...………….I made more in beginning and do now, but there was aperiod during business start up where she made more.

Married only a year, so the financial impact should be minimal, no children together, so no child support or custody issues. The sex has dried up, pretty obvious that’s she’s cheating based on what you’ve said.

So, why are you still in it?

-Augustus-

 

[Ranger]

WHAT
oh, a love letter.
Ranger, "no" you do not understand my reasoning.

Go back to building houses, * please. Stop writing love letters to me. Btw, op, excuse me, some people are easily hurt by strangers on forums.

Get some counseling & time of work. Peace. Best of luck, this is not the place to seek opinions.

Opinions vary

 

[highSpeed]

Another love letter to me.


I never said I was married. Nor to keep a cheating wife. Your "comprehensive" skills are admirable. Cheers. lol

Number one, the main point of my response was your comment about getting counseling, so please, go back and check your comment. Second, ok, if it makes you feel better, insert significant other to better understand it doesn't have to be someone's wife. Ok, your girlfriend is gulping down some other guy's c*ck. Does that make you feel better? Does that make you feel like counseling would work better? Geez, stop getting so hung up on a single word, think about things more in concepts and you'll begin to have a better understanding of the world.

 

[marvinlfloresq]

Number one, the main point of my response was your comment about getting counseling, so please, go back and check your comment. Second, ok, if it makes you feel better, insert significant other to better understand it doesn't have to be someone's wife. Ok, your girlfriend is gulping down some other guy's c*ck. Does that make you feel better? Does that make you feel like counseling would work better? Geez, stop getting so hung up on a single word, think about things more in concepts and you'll begin to have a better understanding of the world.

Perphaps counseling is for people who are codependent and need help letting go -
See how its you who needs a better understanding. IMO A trained therapist is better than this forum. Im just sharing what I learn, people are free to do what ever they want.