The single most important principle I've learned for attracting women is...

[mrgoodstuff]

This is not true at all. I know plenty of highly successful women...doctors, lawyers, business women dating dudes who might be construction laborers, warehouse workers or be unemployed. And they will date these dudes for YEARS before they realize they are losers. They pay for everything, buy them things and waste their money.

This happens a LOT more than people realize. And to boot many times these guys are not anything special to look at. It's almost as if these women believe that is all they deserve in life.

Once someone invests in you their feelings and attachment grows. It can take years to break that. This is why we plead for men to ensure women Invest.

 

[Mrpua]

"women cannot and will not date down"

Neither will men, bro. If you feel like a woman has lower value than you, would you give her the time of day? would you?

When it comes to dating, there is only one way that it could work: Each side needs to have lower value than the other side, but each side needs to give off the impression of higher value. it's all fake man.

if you don't know what I mean: imagine A and B

A won't date B unless B has higher value
B won't date A unless A has higher value

We have a problem here. a paradox. it is impossible for A to have higher value than B and B to have higher value than A at the same time.

So each side, using whatever technique, creates this perception that he/she has higher value than the other side. You pretend you have higher value than the girl using whatever technique (dress better, fake confidence, luxury car) to get the girl, while you believe she actually has higher value than you (afterall, if you didn't believe she has higher value than you, you wouldn't be interested in her). And the same is true from the girl's point of view.

It's all about creating a fake perception man.

 

[Atom Smasher]

There is no paradox. Men will always date down, for as I said, men are superior.

The natural order of things is that men are sacrificial leaders. Women need guidance and leadership. In return, she gives sex and companionship. In the natural order, men will always have to date down in terms of abilities, not intrinsic worth.

In an actualized male there is no pretension about superiority. I don't need to fake confidence anymore. I've got it. Dressing better is not pretending. Rather, it is declaring to yourself and to the world that you are a man of refinement. A luxury car is absolutely not necessary. A clean and organized car is.

Learn to cultivate real confidence and power, my man. If I did it, virtually anybody can.

 

[zekko]

There is no paradox. Men will always date down, for as I said, men are superior.

The natural order of things is that men are sacrificial leaders. Women need guidance and leadership. In return, she gives sex and companionship. In the natural order, men will always have to date down in terms of abilities, not intrinsic worth.

That is the natural order of things. The problem is that our society has made a mess of about everything, and places more value on the female. Not in the sense that she is more valuable because she represents the womb and the future - but because of her sexuality, and our culture has made sex king (or in this case, queen).

I was thinking this the other day: I don't like the way Arab nations treat their women, but I'll say this for them. At least their men haven't given away all their power.

Good thread.

 

[Spaz]

Let's discuss this. Post one single realization/strategy/technique/mindset that you find to be all-important in terms of generating attraction with women.

For me, it is this:

It is the mindset that "I am better than you in every way. I am above you. I am judging you to see if you're worthwhile."

It is true that women cannot and will not date down. In order for there to be attraction in the first place, she must perceive that you are higher status than she, that you have the potential to be her mentor, teacher and even inspiration.

You don't do this in a nasty way, but rather in a friendly but slightly reserved way. Call her out on her verbal nonsense with an amused attitude. Always convey that she is being tested, but temper that with a kind, friendly attitude. That is the alchemy that generates interest, gentlemen. Some of you blue and purple pillers will retort, "This is preposterous, Atom! It can't be attractive to be so arrogant.

Au contraire, my friend. The key is balancing your bedrock of superiority with positive, affirming comments sparingly and only when appropriate. Make her hunger to please you and be accepted.

This is a direct means of flipping the script. You are acting fully in your masculine essence, which in turn triggers her feminine, submissive essence. Paradoxically, you will not be turning women off, but rather, you will be intriguing them and they will be feeling, "Could it be that this guy is different from all the other betas that vye for my attention?"

Women desperately desire a man who knows he is superior both to her and to his so-called "competition". A relaxed "knowing" this fact is what you need to convey. Most men are afraid of her and she knows it.

Don't ever do the "Please accept me" monkey dance that comes so naturally to us and is so prevalent.

You must convey that you are in control of time and space itself, and also your interactions with her. The primary energy flow in your interactions should flow from you to her. You are in control of your conversations. You provide the momentum.

Be superior, gentlemen, because a superior man is what attracts worthwhile women. Be dominant. Be the sun.

Good job !

At least someone on here has some balls and knows how to use it.

This not only generates attraction from women but it does the same for lesser men - followers.

Realise this 1 single important fact; that a leader always feels superior because he is and he must.

This is what it takes to create, maintain and enlarge a man's sphere of influence. In that sphere he is dominant, his life narratives and rules applies. His power. His aura. His mojo. The impossible will be possible.

Those outside of that sphere either hates him, envies him, admires him or wants to be in that sphere.

Every man has a sphere, is it only you inside that sphere or you under the influence of someone else sphere cloaking you own?

 

[AttackFormation]

Frame is a backwards-rationalized myth in 2018.

lol, I found this funny not because I disagree but because of your laconic expressions. Wanna elaborate?

 

[Spaz]

Respectfully disagree. In my opinion a leader's self-perception means very little.

It means everything to the leader of men. He needs it to continously improve and be above par. To be excellent in his passions and to be effective.

I judge leaders on results. Nothing more and nothing less.

As you or anyone should. A leader not only inspires but does the impossible when it was previously thought not.

He leads by example, is strict, has boundaries and is dismissive - a leader is both a caveman and a prince all rolled into 1 being.

I've perceived many humble leaders who inspire and many many braggarts who do nothing but brag.

Those who have or is currently leading other men knows that there is no such thing as a humble leader. It doesn't exist.

An effective leader is one that increases the ownership, responsibilities and autonomy of his followers - to think for themselves and try out new ideas. Of course all within his sphere and within his boundaries. He sets the narratives.

There's nothing humble abt that, it's merely effective leadership.

Do not be confused with men who has position but r poor leader who uses fear as a motivating factor.

I don't read books about self-proclaimed superior human beings who don't produce results.

If anyone does then they r incredibly stupid.

 

[AttackFormation]

It's a myth because you are pretending to have control over the uncontrollable. It's dangerous because you are only fooling yourself and will overlook many warning signs in favor of your own pride. I used to believe in frame too because I would view a snapshot of a given interaction with a woman as some sort of set in stone dynamic. I was in relationships where I did everything "perfectly" and I assumed nothing could go wrong because of it. Ultimately, external forces are going to determine the outcome. You control 50% at best.

The backwards rationalizing I see here is:

1. Overrating the significance of a single moment in time with a woman
2. Underrating the importance of a woman's character, which is responsible for 50% of the situation minimum.
3. Taking credit for her 50% contribution when your same frame would crash and burn with most others.
4. Reframing the Anarchy and Chaos of a game as something you control (taking pride in seducing and dating hoes)

I wish I had something to point out but I couldn't agree more, haha. "Backwards rationalization" was a great way to put it.

 

[Ranger]

An interesting fact is that some pretty disastrous failed men pull women all the time. Professional women. They pass themselves off like leaders and would get fragged or get the hell beat out of them in an ally if they did try to lead men. I’ve seen it.
We can talk about the results of leaders because we are men. We are linear in thought and action. But it means nothing to women and how they feel about him. Even if they hate him, they will still f@ck him. I’ve seen this as well.
It’s a primal biological breeding program. That’s why guys can fake it and pull chicks. If somebody says “yeah but not quality women”, I’m going to laugh at you. I’ve seen high end women in downtown Denver get dropped off by their own car, driven by a guy who doesn’t even own his own vehicle.
The long game is to be that leadership role man. Better for you and better for her.

 

[Mike32ct]

I have enormous respect for AS and his posts. I also have no doubt that arrogance could work on a lot of women. They won’t admit it; but, I’m sure plenty of women have slept with a guy that was full of himself.

But one of Mike’s Key Principles is “Never become the person you hate.” I’m very turned off by arrogance or pretentiousness from males or females. So I really CAN’T get a big head. (Please don’t give me the whole, “It’s ok if you can back it up.” That’s not the point. You can be high value AND down to earth.)

But I do agree with AS about absolutely NOT becoming the “Please accept me” dancing monkey. I would say that, at a minimum, you should at least consider her your equal. She’s not necessarily “better than you” because she’s hot.

Make no mistake; these eyerolls and other rude/dismissive things that women do when guys approach ARE intended to establish (and/or reinforce) a “She’s better than you” dynamic. But you don’t need to accept that dynamic. She can think she’s better. But you don’t have to believe that.

 

[AttackFormation]

FWIW I usually agree with your posts too lol.

Hot women have harems of alpha males in 2018. Alpha male fun guy is poaching alpha male looks guy, status guy, and money guy, or vice versa. Women leave lawyers for doctors. The entire conception of frame relies on the false assumption that women are monogamous, and therefore if she acts hypergamous or polyandrous it's a reflection on your failure as a man to do something or other.

This reminds me of the divide in the red pill between the idea that men and women are both agents, and the guys who whether they are aware of it themselves or not have this idea that men are hyperagents and women are hypoagents, "like children", and their behavior is mens' fault collectively or personally depending on the situation. I personally don't buy that second line of reasoning, I guess you could call it purple pill. Women and men are both agents and it's part of the red pill to realize that.

 

[btownbuck2012]

It's almost as if these women believe that is all they deserve in life.

That’s a very interesting observation.

 

[Roober]

Good post @Atom Smasher

I believe the key is not in the belief you are above your woman, it is that you are better than all other men.

You are the master of your domain and there a limited number challengers and superiors (I can think of 2 right now in my life). You will come across superior men, and must be ready to humbly admit they are your superior (not too them obviously!). However, what happens next is that you learn from them through observation or engagement.

There was a study done of 50 groups of people, several times. They were all to work on a task together, no leader or roles assigned. They found that within the first minute, a dominance hierarchy was established in 50% of the groups. Within 5 minutes, all of them had a leader. Put this in a social context and you see it happen. When there are two equals, they will either coexist, or pride will cause conflict (usually in the weaker of the two, the "fake alpha").

Now, if this happens so quickly on controlled studies, wouldn't it be fair to conclude that this happens in social interactions? When you are around people with a woman, the dominance will occur naturally, and either you end up at the bottom or the top. And there will be equals at each level. So, if you take your woman out and are consistently on the lower end of the spectrum, is your woman with a high value man? Look at where you rank in your social interactions and you will have an idea of your value.

For example, I met my GF group of friends a couple months back. Since then, when we see them, they come to me for advice, want to know my plan, and generally defer to my ideas. Did I do anything? Not that I know of, I am respectful, listen well, crack jokes, and just have a good time. But somehow, people I barely met have already deferred to me. Why? It is not arrogance, belittling, or deliberate attempt to elevate myself.

There is a very superficial understanding of what atom smasher suggested in his initial post. The claims of arrogance, and women shaming is a clear illustration of the misunderstanding of the what he prescribes. It isn't about negging, arrogance, pride, challenge, intelligence, money or any of that nonsense. It is just about being the superior man., which is actually quite simple. One explanation could be doing the right thing at the right time with the right people in the right way. You live your life in a way that is superior to everyone else.

You should ask yourself if you are a superior man? Are you humble, polite, powerful, confident, hard-working, ambitious, loving, generous, communicative? If I wanted to simplify it, I would use the big 5 personality traits. A superior man is high in conscientiousness, low in neuroticism, and fairly balanced in openness, extraversion, and agreeableness.

Most, if not all, are even close to an ideal man, but have too much pride to admit their areas that need improvement. It is FAR easier to blame everyone else than look inside. And until that happens, nothing will change... the never-ending hate that pollutes society will persist. I mean, just on this small group on individuals, look how much hate pollutes this place?

 

[AttackFormation]

It's Tradcuck thinking, the latter.

LOL, so that's what it's called, that term is really funny. I love the red pill language... incel acronyms are freaking hilarious too.

 

[Atom Smasher]

I have enormous respect for AS and his posts. I also have no doubt that arrogance could work on a lot of women. They won’t admit it; but, I’m sure plenty of women have slept with a guy that was full of himself.

But one of Mike’s Key Principles is “Never become the person you hate.” I’m very turned off by arrogance or pretentiousness from males or females. So I really CAN’T get a big head. (Please don’t give me the whole, “It’s ok if you can back it up.” That’s not the point. You can be high value AND down to earth.)

But I do agree with AS about absolutely NOT becoming the “Please accept me” dancing monkey. I would say that, at a minimum, you should at least consider her your equal. She’s not necessarily “better than you” because she’s hot.

Make no mistake; these eyerolls and other rude/dismissive things that women do when guys approach ARE intended to establish (and/or reinforce) a “She’s better than you” dynamic. But you don’t need to accept that dynamic. She can think she’s better. But you don’t have to believe that.

It has nothing to do with arrogance. Did you see what I said here (and say often in my posts) that it is all about kindness, friendliness, service, and on and on. Women know me as a kind, friendly guy but they also respect me as a man.

I would say that I'm not perceived in RL as arrogant at all. I think the right word would be "bold", yet still polite and respectful.

We need to remember that on a forum we convey somewhat formularized ideas, but they must be tempered with common sense, personality, chemistry with others, etc.

It's important to read between the lines, experiment with the "training wheels", and once ready, ditch the training wheels once the main idea is integrated into one's core, customized to one's personality.

Never forget that well-balanced women are ONLY attracted to men who know they are superior to them.

 

[zekko]

I have always thought that people who consider themselves superior do so because of some deeply rooted insecurity(s).

Yeah, I'm not sure how comfortable I am going around thinking that I'm superior to everybody else, that sounds like a very thin line to walk. Besides which, "pride goeth before a fall" and I've always thought that there is value in humility (although that too is very tricky when it comes to women).

Maybe instead of saying we are superior, we could think of it as fully embracing and seeing the value of the male role. Especially since society today doesn't recognize the real value of the male role - unfortunately. Society views males as simply service vehicles for the females - protect them, fix their car, clean out their eaves, etc.

 

[Who Dares Win]

In the current world in order to make that tactict to work you need to have the right "physique du role" as the french say, which means that you need to possess the right appearance to be believable in that role.

The lightweight MMA champion which could beat 90% of the men around would work in front of a club door cause he misses the appearance despite being able to do what he has to.

Right now in current society basically women filter men from many physical features and according to those you can afford to be something, dont wanna sound harsh but there is no way to charm a woman right now if you are short fat and bald not even if you are socrates reborn, cause she wont pay attention to you nor her friends will give you a shot.

So in my opinion the principle of which Atom talks is correct however its not something sufficient to make it work.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Yeah, I'm not sure how comfortable I am going around thinking that I'm superior to everybody else, that sounds like a very thin line to walk. Besides which, "pride goeth before a fall" and I've always thought that there is value in humility (although that too is very tricky when it comes to women).

Maybe instead of saying we are superior, we could think of it as fully embracing and seeing the value of the male role. Especially since society today doesn't recognize the real value of the male role - unfortunately. Society views males as simply service vehicles for the females - protect them, fix their car, clean out their eaves, etc.

If you're referring to my OP, I of course didn't use the phrase "everybody else". I am referring to women. I am inferior to many men in abilities, and superior to others, just as all men are. However, when it comes to women, men have superior physical strength, superior cognitive abilities, ability to think rationally, the list goes on. Men need to embrace this superiority. Instead, most men, and that includes a high percentage of men here at SS, deep down consider themselves inferior to women. That, as we all know, is the message that is injected into men and women alike from birth.

Women are created to play a supporting role in a man's life, and not to lead him. The natural order is for her to submit to him. But what do we see in reality? Because of men's weakness for women's attention and approval, women are emboldened to put men down, sh!t test them, speak disrespectfully, etc. Men do not demand respect because deep down they are afraid and they feel inferior. The fact that Hollywood and the advertising industry mocks men as buffoons speaks volumes.

My world opened up and normalized when I stopped being intimidated and instead judged women by a standard of integrity. In practical terms, that means calling them out on their nonsense, and punishing bratty behavior. Within those parameters I've set for my life, women find me very polite, kind, interesting, and easy to talk to. And most importantly, easy to respect. Most men don't understand this seeming paradox because they think in absolute terms and don't consider the careful nuances involved in balancing strength with kindness. In fact, they can't even envision this as a possibility. It's either/or for most, but for me, it's all about finding these life principles and customizing and then leveraging them to work for me.

Women are children. You are superior. Not in intrinsic worth, but in knowledge, cognitive ability, strength, power, clarity of thought, mastery of emotion, etc. Women need to be managed properly in order to be respected by them. Women have a built-in desire and need to look up to a man.

Are YOU, reader, a man worthy to be looked up to by women, or do you find yourself monkey dancing around trying to impress them and get them to like you? "If I just say this the right way, and do that at just the right time, she will like me..."

We need to stop the self-shaming "I mustn't think I'm superior" and pick up the attitudes that great men of history shared. I can tell you that any man of destiny is looked up to by women, and this is specifically because of how he makes her feel because of his superior stature.

Or, you can choose to stay the way you are and whine about how hard it is to find a decent woman. You can't can't find a decent woman because you are invisible to them, an object to step around when near them. You don't even register on their radar because you don't emit an of aura of self-assurance. Therefore, you don't even think that they exist. Mutual phantoms passing each other by, each unaware of the other.

Why not choose to be a great man? That used to be a noble endeavor. Today it is shameful.

 

[Atom Smasher]

In the current world in order to make that tactict to work you need to have the right "physique du role" as the french say, which means that you need to possess the right appearance to be believable in that role.

The lightweight MMA champion which could beat 90% of the men around would work in front of a club door cause he misses the appearance despite being able to do what he has to.

Right now in current society basically women filter men from many physical features and according to those you can afford to be something, dont wanna sound harsh but there is no way to charm a woman right now if you are short fat and bald not even if you are socrates reborn, cause she wont pay attention to you nor her friends will give you a shot.

So in my opinion the principle of which Atom talks is correct however its not something sufficient to make it work.

I used to think that way too but I found otherwise through experience. I'm OK looking, nothing great, maybe a "7", but I get come-hither looks from women everywhere I go. This is because of what I project. It's all in the mind, men. Many men think it's all about looks first, when in fact it's all about AURA first. What do you project to the outside world? Do you project that you're a man who is destined for greatness, or do you project a man who needs attention from somebody, anybody who looks halfway decent?

If men spent more time thinking about projecting power and self-assuredness and less time fretting over perceived physical imperfections, there would be no need for forums like this. A man's aura directly affects women's perception of him physically. Women's imaginations are maliable depending upon what you project.

 

[Who Dares Win]

I used to think that way too but I found otherwise through experience. I'm OK looking, nothing great, maybe a "7", but I get come-hither looks from women everywhere I go. This is because of what I project. It's all in the mind, men. Many men think it's all about looks first, when in fact it's all about AURA first. What do you project to the outside world? Do you project that you're a man who is destined for greatness, or do you project a man who needs attention from somebody, anybody who looks halfway decent?

If men spent more time thinking about projecting power and self-assuredness and less time fretting over perceived physical imperfections, there would be no need for forums like this. A man's aura directly affects women's perception of him physically. Women's imaginations are maliable depending upon what you project.

Totally agree on the aura projection however I dont believe its something you control, that aura as much as confidence is the sum of your "energy" and determination plus all the feedbacks you go in your life before such moment.

They said napoleon had the aura of a god and that his presence alone in the field counted as 1000 extra soldiers nonetheless he was coming from a campaign of victories and praises from his troops.

Its kinda hard for the average joe who gets rejected at job interviews and picking up attempts to project such a powerful aura, in my opinion the aura is the final result of a good starting point and a decent amount of success.

Its not that we succeed cause of the aura, its the aura cause of success.