Told my ex to move on. I keep looking at her insta story...

Dingo

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"Stuff happened".... ??

I mean there is stuff.... and there STUFF....

You obviously care... Do you want to salvage the relationship ?

If not you have to go NC...
 

chris2for

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"Stuff happened".... ??

I mean there is stuff.... and there STUFF....

You obviously care... Do you want to salvage the relationship ?

If not you have to go NC...
She didn’t cheat or anything like that. She’s very loyal. Doesn’t go out partying that much-every once in a while for a friend’s birthday. Got a long with my family. So no “STUFF”.
 

chris2for

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She isn't going to think you are indifferent by looking at her stories - she's going to think you still care. But who cares what she thinks anyway. Stop looking. Block her, and move on. You WILL do that one day. You can choose to do it now and get on with your life, or you can suffer a while longer. If you didn't still care to some degree, you wouldn't have any desire to look, but the fact that you are looking proves that you do.
Yea, I admit I still care about her but that doesn’t mean I care about her in a romantic way.
 

oldmanofthesea

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Yea, I admit I still care about her but that doesn’t mean I care about her in a romantic way.
In what way do you still care about her, and why?

Would a "friend" agonize over what another "friend" thinks when they view their Instagram stories?
 

bizzym

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How is that dad mode? You’ve never fallen out of love with a girl but still cared about her as a person?
Still think you're in denial because you're definitely still in love with her.
 

IKO69

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I mean if you enjoy suffering, keep at it I guess?
 

vanballmoos

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Why does everyone keeps coming down on OP. I think it's more than normal to still be curious about an ex after a breakup.
 

Billtx49

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Why does everyone keeps coming down on OP. I think it's more than normal to still be curious about an ex after a breakup.
Right, but it prolongs a mans emotional healing time. Borders on masochism to keep doing it to yourself.
 

bizzym

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Right, but it prolongs a mans emotional healing time. Borders on masochism to keep doing it to yourself.
Hold up. Y’all think this behavior is normal (looking at her every post knowing she can see that you’ve looked) ? Especially coming from someone who told their ex to move on? Isn’t this beyond curiosity at this point?
 

Billtx49

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Hold up. Y’all think this behavior is normal (looking at her every post knowing she can see that you’ve looked) ? Especially coming from someone who told their ex to move on? Isn’t this beyond curiosity at this point?
Yep, like I said earlier it borders on masochism, but more probably it’s an obsession.
 
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oldmanofthesea

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Hold up. Y’all think this behavior is normal (looking at her every post knowing she can see that you’ve looked) ? Especially coming from someone who told their ex to move on? Isn’t this beyond curiosity at this point?
And going out of their way to post on an internet forum asking for advice about it?

Yes, it's normal. Perfectly normal. Is it healthy? No. Is he in denial about his feelings for her? Probably. We've all been there. It's ok. No shame. The real question is: Do you listen to the advice you requested or do you keep asking for it while defending yourself repeatedly against the advice?
 

soulforge

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To a man of VALUE, time is a precious commodity.. Why would you waste another 6 months or a year of your time, being curious about your ex and SLOWING down the healing process!

In the end, she is going to MOVE ON.. and you are going to move on.. So why waste anymore time lingering over her posts, her pics, obsessing about her.

Yes it's a hard thing to do, especially when you have emotionally bonded with a person.

So why not just take on board the advice given, from people who have been in this exact situation and have managed to get over an ex, the quickest and easiest way possible.

If op applied full NC on all platforms, including social media, he could be over this chick in no time, and using his time better spent on things that really matter!
 

chris2for

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To a man of VALUE, time is a precious commodity.. Why would you waste another 6 months or a year of your time, being curious about your ex and SLOWING down the healing process!

In the end, she is going to MOVE ON.. and you are going to move on.. So why waste anymore time lingering over her posts, her pics, obsessing about her.

Yes it's a hard thing to do, especially when you have emotionally bonded with a person.

So why not just take on board the advice given, from people who have been in this exact situation and have managed to get over an ex, the quickest and easiest way possible.

If op applied full NC on all platforms, including social media, he could be over this chick in no time, and using his time better spent on things that really matter!
That's the thing though I have moved on. I'd rather be single than with someone who makes me have doubt.
 

soulforge

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That's the thing though I have moved on. I'd rather be single than with someone who makes me have doubt.
I have moved on from my ex too.. Do you know how many times I check her Insta or her social media? NEVER

Got better chit to do!
 

vanballmoos

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I have moved on from my ex too.. Do you know how many times I check her Insta or her social media? NEVER

Got better chit to do!
This!

OP, just out of curiosity how often does she post and how often do you look?
 

Billtx49

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She posts a few times a day. Almost every day. Music, her dog, etc. and I'll look at just about everyone.
That’s obsessive behavior in an attempt to keep your internal emotional connection with her.
 
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vanballmoos

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Obsessive behavior in an attempt to keep an emotional connection with her.
Not to say I disagree with you, but why not just speak up if that's the case?
No point in asking OP because he'll just deny everything...
 
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