How do you know if a woman actually wants to be with you?

[AttackFormation]

As the title says. How do you know if a woman actually wants to be with you? how do you know she is not with you because of some provision she gains out of you? How do you know whether she fvcks you because she wants to, or because she thinks she has to, or because Brad stopped calling her anymore?

I'm terrified of spending the next several years building up my life, only for the possibility of ending up with someone who doesn't really like or care about me personally and realizing it too late. Either they got with me because of some kind of provision, or they just felt an urge to pair up and whoever will do to satisfy their irrational drive. I don't even know if I will ever get into a relationship, but if I decide to that's what scares me.

 

[AttackFormation]

Once they hit baby rabies time you simp-ly can't know.

Yeah that's the thing. When I ask my mother why she got with her 2nd husband who she doesn't even like or really want to be with after her and my father divorced, she literally cannot give a rational reason. She even tells me, "maybe there is no good reason I can say" or one that "you would understand". The latest time I asked her about it, after some squirming, in the end she just said she got pregnant. That's the kind of behavior I'm afraid of.

 

[Poonani Maker]

^^ Interesting you bring up your mom. MY mom just recently told me how my dad got involved with her life WAY back in the 70s after Vietnaum/Marines. He was just enrolled in University in the deep South, and had just met my mom at a bar a couple of weeks before. So while at university he just said, "Fvck it" and dropped out. He was there to be a lawyer (his parents were paying for it and they were LIVID when he quit). Anyway, my dad just "shows up" at my mom's apartment unannounced, and he just STAYED there (without her asking). I'd kinda liken my mom to Rocky's Adrian at the time timid and quiet, but Much better looking. My mom was hot! I cannot lie. Hard to evaluate your own mother that way but my friends always said so and everybody else did as well. Plus she was/is smart, very attuned socially thus everybody likes her and her career was 45+ years in the courts.

So my dad just moved IN with my mom Without her asking him to one day. Kinda fvcked up, but she let it happen as she didn't know what to do or to say "no." She has pictures of the exact Day that he came to her apartment and short thereafter that. He was fit as fvck due to Marines and Very good looking. I wish I had his exact looks (in old age he was a spittin image of Nick Nolte, but his younger years he looks way better than Nolte ever did). He was a badas5 muther fer who'd get into many many bar fights and my mom has pictures of him then with black eyes etc. He claimed to have lost only one fight vs a 10 years older dude at a pool. The guy kept beating him down and leaving him, then my dad would get back up on his feet and say, "Where do you think you're going??" and the guy would come back and fvck him up some more and then my dad kept getting up. Eventually the guy said to him, "If you ever learn how to fight, you'll be one bad mf..." or something or other I forget - that was before the marines though.

Anyway, when my dad married my mom it was just him and her NO RELATIVES he dragged her down to the minister and that was that quick "I do" "I do." I'm sure he had guns on him as well during the "wedding." He always had his guns. She showed me a picture of their wedding day and she had on a Black dress (not the typical white one you see), as that's all she had to wear, she very pale then with buttcut 70s hair-do long hair. My dad looked so cool on the couch with long 70s hair and not a very fancy suit as well.

Everything was Quick! I remember my dad telling me of him going into a hospital to get my mom out of there as she was having "electric shock treatment" as it was a new experimental thing they were doing in the 70s. My dad walked in the hospital shouting with his gun drawn and dragging my mom out of there. He was like WTF are you doing?!! to my mom. They smoked a lot of marijuana back then too. She wasn't used to my dad's crazy lifestyle or crazy badboy friends (musicians, bikers, brawlers, freedomlovers just kicking up crazy ruckus everywhere they went or just wild at our home in the garage whatnot).

My dad just butted IN to my mom's life. I do not think that you can get away with A LOT of the things my dad did nowadays. When he'd get pulled over for drunk driving, the cop would just tell him to go on home (and he did what the cops told him to and that was that go to sleep sleep it off).

 

[Roober]

The issue is that you place the woman above you by allowing her to be the judge of the relationship. It sounds like you have to fix your mindset. I suggest looking at ways to improve your confidence to a level where you believe...

All women want to be with me. Do I want to be with them?

You are in control of your own destiny and choice of partner when you spread your seed, and make the decision to only see one woman.

 

[Magotrox]

If you wanna someday have a good LTR, you must know how to choose a good woman. This demands some experience. So, my sugestion for you is to get some experience, by being with different types of woman in quick relationships, causal dates (the opposite to LTR). As the time goes, you will know things you REALLY hate and don't want in a partner (and know how to detect that things by distance). You will, too, find the things you like, and how to notice that from far. Be used to analyse her behavior, actions and deeds (from past and present ones), not just words and sayings. The final test is to try the LTR with the girl you choose from many you tasted. Of course, there's no 100% secure way, but you can reduce the chances of being with a awful one and troubles, just because she is hot. Aim for a good woman, not just her looks (for LTR looks is NOT good enought. She can be hot, by the way, but you need much more from her, specialy that she must TRULY like you).

 

[fastlife]

The issue is that you place the woman above you by allowing her to be the judge of the relationship. It sounds like you have to fix your mindset. I suggest looking at ways to improve your confidence to a level where you believe...

All women want to be with me. Do I want to be with them?

You are in control of your own destiny and choice of partner when you spread your seed, and make the decision to only see one woman.

Along the line of what I came to post.

The question in the OP is one I've definitely grappled with--but it's the wrong one--wrong in that your frame has nothing to do with her motivations. And her motivations are unknowable--and, let's face it, unless you need some type of validation from her, inconsequential.

What matters is behavior: The tangible. Is she giving you what you want? Are you having fun? Do you feel good? Good. Everything else is ego.

 

[Alvafe]

pull out your resources sometimes and see what she does, I read here one thing if you are well paid and pretty well in life you should toss her some fake financial problems to see how she react, like you was been fired and have no money saved and can't spend on anything for the next 2-3 months and see what happens, if during that time she ghost you and not pay for the dates now and still spend the same amount of time

anotehr way is keep tabs on everything you spend on her and what she spends on you, if she never does start to question it

 

[R.U.G.]

Women like options. Well, until the baby rabies come. So date under 32 or over 40 and that should help. When you are fvcking them, even with a condom (they break you know), pull out and cvm on them or in the condom and take it with you or flush it down the toilet. Women, in general, view men in "relationships" as utilities for support and offspring; aside from them making on par or more money then the average man. Women do not like to spend their own money. They rather spend yours. LOL. Don't be that guy. When I am ready to have kids, I am going through surrogacy. No child support drama for me.

 

[AttackFormation]

Along the line of what I came to post.

The question in the OP is one I've definitely grappled with--but it's the wrong one--wrong in that your frame has nothing to do with her motivations. And her motivations are unknowable--and, let's face it, unless you need some type of validation from her, inconsequential.

What matters is behavior: The tangible. Is she giving you what you want? Are you having fun? Do you feel good? Good. Everything else is ego.

The part about validation, and your third paragraph, resonated with me. I made posts along similar lines a long time ago now. But then I looked over it again: "giving you what you want". If what you want is a feeling, how can you know whether she is giving it to you? but you already answered that - you can't. And why do you want her to give you a feeling, if her behavior is the same? I suppose it's validation but if I was going to be in a relationship I can admit to wanting that validation. Otherwise why bother being in one? ("why bother being in a relationship" is something I ask myself anyway, though).

 

[Mazer]

Women like options. Well, until the baby rabies come. So date under 32 or over 40 and that should help. When you are fvcking them, even with a condom (they break you know), pull out and cvm on them or in the condom and take it with you or flush it down the toilet. Women, in general, view men in "relationships" as utilities for support and offspring; aside from them making on par or more money then the average man. Women do not like to spend their own money. They rather spend yours. LOL. Don't be that guy. When I am ready to have kids, I am going through surrogacy. No child support drama for me.

A little off topic but Fack me dude. Didn’t even think of bitches taking that jizz from the condom I chuck in their waste basket and pouring it into their vag. Can’t flush them at her place, they will clog the toilet. I will rinse them out from now on. Thanks

 

[R.U.G.]

A little off topic but Fack me dude. Didn’t even think of bitches taking that jizz from the condom I chuck in their waste basket and pouring it into their vag. Can’t flush them at her place, they will clog the toilet. I will rinse them out from now on. Thanks

You'd be surprised. Check the news, this has happened loads of times. The last woman I was with told me to put the condom in the trash. When she went to the bathroom, I tied the two condoms and put it in a bag and took it with me. She asked me the next day about the condoms as she found the wrapper, but no condom.. I just told her strange. It's in the trash. She made some BS excuse that she was afraid the condom was under the bed or couch or something and someone would find it. She ghosted shortly after.

Gotta be careful with these women.. All in all, most are the same. Take your boys with you. If you want to play a harsh joke on her, take another condom, fill it with horseradish sauce (looks the same as cvm) and if she puts it in her, well, you'll know... It will burn like a mother fvcker I am told. Never did it, but I heard about it. So, instead of sperm jacking you, you horseradished her. LOL.

 

[Magotrox]

You'd be surprised. Check the news, this has happened loads of times. The last woman I was with told me to put the condom in the trash. When she went to the bathroom, I tied the two condoms and put it in a bag and took it with me. She asked me the next day about the condoms as she found the wrapper, but no condom.. I just told her strange. It's in the trash. She made some BS excuse that she was afraid the condom was under the bed or couch or something and someone would find it. She ghosted shortly after.

Gotta be careful with these women.. All in all, most are the same. Take your boys with you. If you want to play a harsh joke on her, take another condom, fill it with horseradish sauce (looks the same as cvm) and if she puts it in her, well, you'll know... It will burn like a mother fvcker I am told. Never did it, but I heard about it. So, instead of sperm jacking you, you horseradished her. LOL.

I just flush down the condoms, and, plus, take a bath and wash everything else after the playtime.

 

[Murk]

Hate to spoil the party but come can only survive about 20 minutes MAX, it's usually dead within minutes outside of the body. I'm sure you're fine if you just keep an eye on her.

I had a girl over 2 nights ago who was visibly upset I put a condom on after dipping inside for like a minute or two. She literally turned her head to the side and had an annoyed look on her face when I put my wrapped **** back inside her. THEN, after I was done, she complained about STD's saying... "well you should have just left it in seeing as you've probably given me something now" I kept bringing up the fact of pregnancy but she just wouldn't listen. Bear in mind I showed her my clean STD text message when she came over, she cared more about an STD than a baby. Kicked her out and ignored her.

Got a text 2 hours ago saying "sorry for overrating the other night". this girl is 29 about to hit 30 - I am NEVER seeing her again.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

She will go out of her way.

 

[Murk]

They're just not enjoyable to fvck at the wall, too crazy

Exactly, I've set my OLD setting to 18-24 and will not be moving it.

 

[oldmanofthesea]

You can start by stopping your belief that there is a such thing as unconditional love, because there isn't. It's a fairy-tale. And that works the same for women and men. If you fall in love with a woman, are with her for 5 years, and she evolves into someone you don't want to be with anymore, you will leave her (or stay with her and be absolutely miserable).

Next, you improve your skill in identifying red flags and then categorizing/treating women accordingly (example, if she's crazy and hot - you check your emotions at the door and just enjoy having good sex with her without grasping for something deeper). You accomplish this by dating a lot of women while having low expectations, taking things slowly, guarding your heart, and learning lessons along the way. I bet you can already think back to some of the women you have dated, and after things didn't work out, you could then realize the red flags and signs you were either oblivious to at the time or deliberately chose to ignore because you were so into her. We've all been there.

Through that process, some women will stick around longer than others (by their choice or by yours). You have to be totally open with the possibility that your relationship could last hours, days, weeks, months, years, or the rest of your life and no matter what ends up being the case, you don't lose anything. You enjoyed it while it lasted and learned from the experience. Yes there will be heart-break, if it was an LTR, but that's just a part of life.

 

[highSpeed]

You can start by stopping your belief that there is a such thing as unconditional love, because there isn't. It's a fairy-tale. And that works the same for women and men. If you fall in love with a woman, are with her for 5 years, and she evolves into someone you don't want to be with anymore, you will leave her (or stay with her and be absolutely miserable).

Next, you improve your skill in identifying red flags and then categorizing/treating women accordingly (example, if she's crazy and hot - you check your emotions at the door and just enjoy having good sex with her without grasping for something deeper). You accomplish this by dating a lot of women while having low expectations, taking things slowly, guarding your heart, and learning lessons along the way. I bet you can already think back to some of the women you have dated, and after things didn't work out, you could then realize the red flags and signs you were either oblivious to at the time or deliberately chose to ignore because you were so into her. We've all been there.

Through that process, some women will stick around longer than others (by their choice or by yours). You have to be totally open with the possibility that your relationship could last hours, days, weeks, months, years, or the rest of your life and no matter what ends up being the case, you don't lose anything. You enjoyed it while it lasted and learned from the experience. Yes there will be heart-break, if it was an LTR, but that's just a part of life.

Have to disagree on men not having unconditional love. Call it dedication, loyalty perhaps but men will stick something out longer than women usually, I imagine it is due to their ability to control their emotions and think logically. Now to be fair, I've seen this decline in men but I suspect that has something at least to do with the fact that so many men are growing up in single mother households these days, so women are the only exposure that many men have in their formative years on a day to day basis. Men are also generally wired to have a higher level of dedication. Men evolved to be the caretaker, the protector, the one who gets the fire started when the women can't/won't. You can't get a fire started in the wild with only two sticks without some level of dedication. Women evolved to be the caretaker of the children, to provide them with emotional support. Emotions can be fickle mostly, so one day you feel like this and tomorrow you may feel a different way completely. That is not a basis for loyalty and dedication.

How do you know if she really wants to be with you? Depends on which day of the week you're on. Generally, she will drop everything to be with you. She'll ignore friends and even family to some degree, to make it happen with you. She'll surprise you with gifts, she'll take care of you, she'll be freaky in bed, that's how you know she wants to be with you because she will show it. The minute that stuff starts to drop off, the emotional drug she's on is dissipating and her interest is dropping. She starts flaking, not being supportive, taking care, providing sex, she's not into it anymore and time to move on. Now hopefully, you haven't been stupid enough to commit to her on a small sample size when the drug of emotions is still high and deeply in her system, you wait to see how she behaves when that drug is no longer in her system. If she still does that stuff to some decent level of degree, she might very well be a keeper.

 

[R.U.G.]

Hate to spoil the party but come can only survive about 20 minutes MAX, it's usually dead within minutes outside of the body. I'm sure you're fine if you just keep an eye on her.

I had a girl over 2 nights ago who was visibly upset I put a condom on after dipping inside for like a minute or two. She literally turned her head to the side and had an annoyed look on her face when I put my wrapped **** back inside her. THEN, after I was done, she complained about STD's saying... "well you should have just left it in seeing as you've probably given me something now" I kept bringing up the fact of pregnancy but she just wouldn't listen. Bear in mind I showed her my clean STD text message when she came over, she cared more about an STD than a baby. Kicked her out and ignored her.

Got a text 2 hours ago saying "sorry for overrating the other night". this girl is 29 about to hit 30 - I am NEVER seeing her again.

Sperm can live up to 1 day inside a condom. Why? It's in a moist area.

Here's a doc's comment on it, but why chance it. Take the condom with you.

https://www.healthtap.com/user_questions/1600809-how-long-can-sperm-live-in-a-condom

 

[oldmanofthesea]

I agree with all your points @highSpeed - I agree that despite my wanting to believe that women and men are equal when it comes to unconditional love, both my own (painful) personal experience and observation as well as everything I've read says the opposite. So I do believe that men tend to be MORE unconditional in love than women do, but I still don't think it's truly 100% unconditional. And since a woman's love is not unconditional, it only makes sense to adopt a mindset where you know that your time together will last as long as it lasts, and to ensure you are laying the ground-work for being able to continue your life with a minimum of stress after a breakup may occur. This means ensuring you aren't penalized financially, and that you don't lose your game or any of the other parts of you that make you a good and valuable and attractive person (in shape, good social life, ability to flirt with strange women even if that's all it is). But also, you have to ensure you don't avoid getting into relationships simply because you are constantly paranoid that they won't last forever. You just never know.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

Statement of intent. Breaking of rapport. Date/time. What I will be doing. Then telling her when we are meeting up.

It's funny how society pedals beta cuck provider In contrast to what actually works. I am not insinuating 100% success rate. I am suggesting a higher probability of success in being assertive, blunt, and bold.

Too many skinny jeans, cucks, low test soy boys, and fairy phaghitree sissies trying to be pretty.