While having a typical first date in mind is pretty common, such as a simple meeting over drinks or coffee, I would advise that you move away from any routine in which you typically do X,Y,Z on the second, third, fourth dates, etc.
The standard X, Y, Z activity approach works mainly on an assumption that the majority of women prefer things to progress with men in a particular way, hence have a particular end-goal in mind, i.e., they know what they want. This approach may work a little better with women in their late 20s because such women will tend to have a more idealistic sense of what they want and how it will progress to that "...and the rest is history" story they tell their family and friends for years: "We first met at Starbucks (first date). I remember we locked eyes and I thought to myself there was something special about him... then we played mini-golf (second date) and he was so sweet! That moment he touched my hand as he helped me learn how to putt made me swoon! When we had the fancy dinner (third date) and he said this and that, I knew he was the one! And well, the rest is history!!!!" The rock on the finger....the big wedding.... you get the drift.
Obviously no such woman wants to begin that story with: "I was giving him head 3 hours after we met at the bar!!!"
Most women in their mid to late 30s no longer think in those idealistic ways anymore, and tend to let go a little of that fairytale progression. They are typically, by this age, on the flip side of some LTR/marriage that lead to some cynicism in that fairytale thinking. In addition to this, they may retain a desire to find someone to settle down with again, eventually, but are in no rush to achieve it. This becomes a secondary goal for a little while. Their primary goal is to live free of whatever repressions that had to deal with through the failing fairytale. They want to have fun, stay out late, have some sex.... they want to be single and a little slutty, play the field if only for a while, until they finally meet the next guy to get serious with (who will typically be the polar opposite of the last guy she was serious with).
This progression can take a woman several years to fully play out, and where she is in that progression is going to determine the extent of her willingness to have sex, how quickly she will allow things to progress to sex, what types of activities she desires or doesn't desire leading up to sex, etc.
When you have an X, Y, Z approach to how you progress with women at this age, it is only going to work with women looking for that particular progression. A newly-free woman diving back into the dating scene after a 5 or 10 year relationship, for example, is not going to be patient enough to go through 6 mini-golf, painting type bonding dates before having sex. They want to paint the town red and get laid. These types will come to your place on the second date to ride you on your couch after dinner.
At some point, they eventually get their fill and begin a screening process in which they make men some men wait just a little bit longer. This is a transitional phase. They will make a more LTR-worthy man wait a little longer and try to get to know them a little better, but still may periodically sleep very quickly with a man of pure sexual attraction. They may also decide, after 2, 3, 4 dates, the guy isn't LTR material after all, never sleep with him, and just disappear (which of course leaves the guy scratching his head). Or, they may be 5 or 6 dates in, decide the same thing, but sleep with him anyway because she put the time into it, but still disappear after.
Then, eventually, a woman hits the period of desiring substance and quality again and wants to be saved from the singles scene.
Eventually they fall back into another LTR.
Having the ability to sense where women are in this progression will give you a much better sense of what to do on your dates with them. It can help you determine which ones to play mini-golf with and which ones to invite straight to your place after spending a few hours at the bar.
