Has anyone actually had success with waiting for the woman to initiate touching?

oldmanofthesea

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 23, 2018
Messages
1,597
Reaction score
3,309
Age
48
Everything I read previously encourages me to be assertive with touching. Of course, you monitor her reaction to it and pull back if needed before trying again later, but I just read in in Doc Love's material where he suggests you don't touch at all. DL says to wait for her to start touching you and then don't reciprocate. Oddly, he mentions nothing in his material about going for the kiss or when it's actually ok to start touching them back and this makes no sense to me.

I have been practicing being more assertive with physical touching and kissing with surprisingly good results - I think - (in the past I avoided touching until it was either too late or totally obvious she wanted it and I lost more than a couple dates who told me they felt "friend vibes only"). Lately, when things are going well on a date, I often initiate the first kiss in the middle of the date by gently grabbing her chin, turning her to face me and kissing her when I sense the timing is right and she has been responsive to my other physical advances. I haven't been rejected once doing this (yet). But according to DL, that would be displaying too much interest and not being enough of a challenge.

I know there is no magic formula or system, but DL's advice seems to be completely contrary to all the other stuff I have read so I'm curious if anyone actually has success with what DL proposes, and if so, when they actually do start touching or kissing. Thanks.
 

wifehunter

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 6, 2015
Messages
5,192
Reaction score
3,319
Age
51
Location
Hoe County, California
"Has anyone actually had success with waiting for the woman to initiate touching?"



Yes, I've had women try to gauge my interest level with eye contact and by trying to hug me. My response to the hug was a tap on the back, signaling low interest. She was 'not my type'.
 

guru1000

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 20, 2007
Messages
5,362
Reaction score
4,403
I only heard of doc loves existence but not his work though I understand a lot of his early stuff inspired many other “gurus”.

The reason doc love says no touchy is because he’s coming from a different mentality and different level of understanding. You would need an advanced guys whole vibe and sense of awareness to leverage this in your favor and why it works. But for the beginner who’s not quite there yet, you absolutely should break the touch barrier and “kino”

Once you’re more experienced, have your vibe and individual style and routine down, you can do things like no touching while being sexual in other ways to build tension to create an air of uncertainty, foreshadowing and mystery.

“Why hasn’t he touched me yet? I feel like he likes me but....is it this outfit? I bet I look like a grandma! Ugh, just kiss me already!”

There’s a Ton of things I do that don’t follow most puas guidelines and rules but I don’t really bring it up for new guys because it won’t help them.

A lot of this is trial and error but most importantly, it’s understanding that the art of seduction is contradictory in nature. That might sound like a cop out, but the reality is that in the field and the real world, things are not so black and white. That’s just your brains inherent need to make sense of everything. So while one day I might tell a guy to flirt deviously and ambiguously with his targets, another day I might say “men don’t flirt, only women do, go after what you want boldly and unapologetically” and both times I’d be right. It’s purely circumstantial. But you need to first get to that place before you can naturally go with whatever the vibe tells you to do or mood you’re in. Some guys are better at being direct, others are better at the sniper game. I say learn the game inside and out.

But ultimately this all leads to the same thing. You can read read read and it certainly helps. But your best teacher will always be failure. If you’re succeeding too often, then you aren’t really learning anything through retrospective analysis. It also means you aren’t challenging yourself. Why let 100 bucks come to you easily in a day when you could be making 1000 if you put in work?

Exactly.

Learn through structure (rules) first.

Then ... Master by surrendering structure.

Be fluid like water. Water meets a glass, it fills up the glass. Water meets a bowl, it fills up the bowl. The glass and the bowl are not the same. Only water a/k/a fluidity can meet the needs of both.
 

The Duke

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 4, 2008
Messages
5,641
Reaction score
8,577
When I was in high school and barely interested in girls I let them initiate every thing. It drove most of them crazy and they tried even harder.
 

Billtx49

Moderator
Joined
May 23, 2013
Messages
6,078
Reaction score
5,482
Location
DFW
When I was in high school and barely interested in girls I let them initiate every thing. It drove most of them crazy and they tried even harder.
Yes, I have also found it’s more common in younger women new to dating that want to be wanted. If they mature properly and their self esteem and confidence grows, they usually expect you to make the advances.
 
Last edited:

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

RangerMIke

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 23, 2014
Messages
4,705
Reaction score
7,751
Location
USA, Louisiana
I ALWAYS wait for them to touch first. And it has never failed me. But then again I've been dating for 30 plus years and I know how to let a woman know I am interested without grabbing at her.

The only reason to touch a chick first is to let her know you are interested in her romantically, it is possible to do this without physical contact and if you can do this, and get her to touch you first... things will be a lot easier.
 

Murk

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 17, 2017
Messages
4,404
Reaction score
3,346
Age
35
Location
London
This was me aged 14-21

Then the lightbulb switched on when I initiated and got results.

25 years old another lightbulb moment when I came on super strong and very sexual with women... no resistance. From then on it was just learned behaviour - if it ain’t broke don’t fix it.

Once you get over the initial hurdle it’s like you crack the code with women - they all want sex and will forgive you if you go too far.

Being too passive is the killer of sex and attraction.
 

top gear

New Member
Joined
Apr 6, 2018
Messages
9
Reaction score
0
Age
25
Wow I was going to post something similar as my first thread, but you got there first so there's no need for me to do so, much wording on to the topic.

The words of a frustated young "hot" man people who's also a player wannabe

Man i like this forum it is realistic, I spent some time reading exaggerated material. I was only a "perverted fella" deep down I was not interested in romance until being 17, then something happened and I went to the manosphere and then I was still normal I mean I believed all the exageration but was still normal, but after that I had my first prostitute and so on untl 17 or 18 and my sexuality surfaced I wanted to bang everyone like I had read also I got my **** together I don't want to brag just to say that I even had time to start spreading my legs to the floor lately.

I'm a great kisser and toucher who I lacks the dominant strongholding vibe before my "awakening" I now and then got orgasm and suprises from a few girls but they long term acquaintances.

after my awakening I discovered I am sexually appealing, won't describe why for it does not matter just know girls gone crazy when I go to fetch my siblings from school, I got deep ey widening, cues, some flashing, and recently my first loud he's so hot from a volleyball girl to her friends.
I'm a pervert sanguine as hell, i go impressing with looks and eye ****ing "everyone" and flirting and asking for stranger to stranger kisses.all in a spirited but self controlled fashion never a zany one.

have I got some sex? absolutely not

even if it's clear they masturbate with my image, even if they bite their lips, they want to have me as their man so whenever I put some interest they play me like they would a long time interest lip rubbing means **** flashing means **** to a potential casual sex experience, in fact sexual desire means **** to it, they touch themselves, and the moment you make them fell something they crave for more even more than you but they don't need to initiate pleasure as we need it and that sucks.

The only totally reciprocated sexual vibes (I'm talking the you could be inside me after half an hour talking vibe) for me have come women over 60 with **** glances, and finger ****ing and all that

I know if i touch them, once they would fall if I kiss them but that's not me maybe after all the girls are subconsciously wating for you to go and touch them out of thin air but first that's weird and second that's not me, and third I'm not interested in nor drawn to LTR flirting but then I don't think they are playing sex games just relation games.

They change when in a situation where is clear they can't meet you again, like in public transport but... you know come on...

So back to the topic yes that's the way mate at least that's what I'm gonna try starting this day casual glance with poker face and no approaches at the little supermarket i frequent the one cashier that ****s my finger is the one I don't flirt with I had been sexually hugged before by a few and had obtained one sided flirting from a hot girl but it's been more than a year and from girls I totally wasn't into.

So oppener at least from my point of view your showing nterest will only lenghen things but it does not matter if the girl is into and you into her the intimate moment will come, but if you're in a shalow and lustful mindset the faintest the mildest I want to **** you glance will **** your chances since you don't fee any compulsion of chasing the girl.

I will let them come to me and see what the ****.without even showing excitement until it's too late for her. if that is actually possible of course.
 

Desdinova

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 15, 2004
Messages
11,639
Reaction score
4,717
I just read in in Doc Love's material where he suggests you don't touch at all. DL says to wait for her to start touching you and then don't reciprocate. Oddly, he mentions nothing in his material about going for the kiss or when it's actually ok to start touching them back and this makes no sense to me.
I've personally never liked Doc Love's material for the same reason: it makes no sense.

Lately, when things are going well on a date, I often initiate the first kiss in the middle of the date by gently grabbing her chin, turning her to face me and kissing her when I sense the timing is right and she has been responsive to my other physical advances. I haven't been rejected once doing this (yet). But according to DL, that would be displaying too much interest and not being enough of a challenge.
My advice is to do what's working, and if what you're doing is bringing you success, then keep doing it.

Being a "challenge" is only useful when the woman is showing high interest in you. You cannot be a challenge to a woman who doesn't give two 5hits about you. It's also not about how much interest you're showing her, but how you're showing the interest. If you're being playful and fun, that's a good way to show interest. If you're begging her for her number or trying to impress her by buying her drinks, that's when showing interest is going to work against you.

As for the woman initiating kino, it certainly does happen. Don't ignore it when she's resting her leg against yours or her elbow is touching yours. She's not only letting you know that she's interested, but she's testing to see if you're going to pull the body part she's touching away. If you don't pull away, you're telling her that you're comfortable with her touching you.
 

17 shots

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 21, 2016
Messages
1,112
Reaction score
1,020
It really just depends on the woman.... some will respect your self control, and like that you're not all over them like other guys... and others will say you weren't aggressive enough
 

MrWood

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 15, 2016
Messages
1,777
Reaction score
1,199
Age
58
Location
Scandinavia
@top gear do you smoke alot of crack, or do you live in India?
 

top gear

New Member
Joined
Apr 6, 2018
Messages
9
Reaction score
0
Age
25
@top gear do you smoke alot of crack, or do you live in India?
Neither I was just sold the asinine knowledge that women are ****ing anything that moves, then you see them in chaturbate, next they are getting naked in youtube, later you see every sport they play they do semi naked you're a cheeky outgoing pervert who looks good so you think you're ****ing the world.

Then you realised cam girls are spoiled prototypes like prostitutes and not the real representation of the woman psyche that women need to get in love or to asses the man as a correct choice to want sex with him in short I've re learned everything common sense, and society, and the bible had tought me about the modesty of women when I was fully prepared to enjoy the "decline" and what do we have? a shattered dream a broken man an aimless one, I know very well how to sing, run, tennis and draw and have some knowledge and don't want to improve anything or add nor add anything else I just want to live and what I've got is just 60% of my quota to feel whole I destined the other 40% to casual sex.

oh if you ask cause of my attitute towards sex, I was normal I just had a ***** and then the other and so on you just habituate to the sacred act eventually and forget the magic of the one body for you.

Things I cherished before prudishness, feelings, romanticism, fidelity now I don't care about and are the root of my sadness. I wanted those too, but I read if you were alfa they would be find letting you **** everything as long as you loved her what I was planning to do, now I know or better said relearned that they behead you if you have another.

I'm self composed though I just needed to get this off my chest.
 

Murk

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 17, 2017
Messages
4,404
Reaction score
3,346
Age
35
Location
London
@top gear do you snort a lot of cocaine or do you live in Eastern Europe?
 

Rapport101

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 8, 2018
Messages
57
Reaction score
17
Age
38
Everything I read previously encourages me to be assertive with touching. Of course, you monitor her reaction to it and pull back if needed before trying again later, but I just read in in Doc Love's material where he suggests you don't touch at all. DL says to wait for her to start touching you and then don't reciprocate. Oddly, he mentions nothing in his material about going for the kiss or when it's actually ok to start touching them back and this makes no sense to me.

I have been practicing being more assertive with physical touching and kissing with surprisingly good results - I think - (in the past I avoided touching until it was either too late or totally obvious she wanted it and I lost more than a couple dates who told me they felt "friend vibes only"). Lately, when things are going well on a date, I often initiate the first kiss in the middle of the date by gently grabbing her chin, turning her to face me and kissing her when I sense the timing is right and she has been responsive to my other physical advances. I haven't been rejected once doing this (yet). But according to DL, that would be displaying too much interest and not being enough of a challenge.

I know there is no magic formula or system, but DL's advice seems to be completely contrary to all the other stuff I have read so I'm curious if anyone actually has success with what DL proposes, and if so, when they actually do start touching or kissing. Thanks.
Yeah I brought this dime manager from my work home with me one night and she just pulled my **** right out and started sucking it. Hoe
 
Top