High indicators of interest but no sex after 3 dates?

way2smart

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Update: Here is what happened. I asked her out on a date for 8pm today. I arrived at 7:55 and called her to let her know that I arrived but she didn't pick up the phone.
She calls me back at 8:15 and tells me "are you here yet?" I said yes of course I have been here since 8pm, she then says that she is coming to my car.
By now it's 8:20 and she is nowhere to be seen, so I just leave.

After I left, she calls me and says:
her: "Where are you?"
Me: "I left"
her: "Why did you leave?"
Me : "Because I waited for you for for 25 minutes"
her: "I am so sorry, i was speaking to my neighbor and lost track of time, can you please come back? I sincerely apologize"
Me: "No, it's not the first time you are late, this is like the 3rd of 4th time, so I can't come back, bye!"

I hang up the phone. Then she calls back immediately again:

Her: "What do you mean "bye"
Me: "I mean bye in a sense that I am not coming back"
Her: "Please come back, I am already outside"
Me: "No I already promised to meet with some one else"
Her: "Oh, ok bye"

Then she hangs up the phone.

Just to give some background info, she was late before, one time she made me wait 40 minutes! So I was tired of her being late.
Did I over react?
 

vpn

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Sounds quite familiar to what I experienced recently.

Exactly the same behaviour, but with s*x hints coming from her and every time I tried to escalate, I got shot down...

She started introducing me to her inner circle and in front of her friends she was acting like we are exclusive. Decided to confront her about it and received the "let's be friends" speech the following day.

If I could have changed one thing, I would have probably just stayed for the ride and not put too much thought into it (like a typical AFC). Just enjoy it and don't worry too much about the sex.
 

way2smart

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She has you in the boyfriend box.

You may find her leading you as you walk absent-mindedly around a garden-centre, or walking around markets or some sh1t early on a Saturday morning a few weeks from now. And you may ask yourself, "how did I get here?".

And you may think "I don't even fvcking like plants. I'd rather be in bed."

You start as you mean to go on.
Turns out she was a virgin. She lost her virginity to me tonight.
I can't believe I found such a gem.
Her interest level is through the roof and she is hot as hell. Easily HB 9 to many of my friends.
 

marmel75

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Turns out she was a virgin. She lost her virginity to me tonight.
I can't believe I found such a gem.
Her interest level is through the roof and she is hot as hell. Easily HB 9 to many of my friends.
Now you know why I stress that each situation needs to be looked at individually not painted with a broad brush of "rules to follow". If you were one of these dudes that followed the 3 dates and dump rule you wouldn't find yourself in this spot. Always remember that.
 

LJBFB

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Sounds quite familiar to what I experienced recently.

Exactly the same behaviour, but with s*x hints coming from her and every time I tried to escalate, I got shot down...

She started introducing me to her inner circle and in front of her friends she was acting like we are exclusive. Decided to confront her about it and received the "let's be friends" speech the following day.

If I could have changed one thing, I would have probably just stayed for the ride and not put too much thought into it (like a typical AFC). Just enjoy it and don't worry too much about the sex.
Met her friends before the bang?! Just as dumb as OP holding hands w/o the bang.

Hey I dont think there was any other problem with OP have a plate on slow mode if he has others on fast. This situation probably wouldve been fine if you saw her every 2 or 3 weeks and she asked for at least 1 of these 4 meets.
 

LJBFB

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Turns out she was a virgin. She lost her virginity to me tonight.
I can't believe I found such a gem.
Her interest level is through the roof and she is hot as hell. Easily HB 9 to many of my friends.
Good, now don't stop being the prize!
 

marmel75

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you arent wrong, but most guys who talk about the 3 date rule are learning how to exercise options, minimize time wasting or simply playing the numbers game.

thats at least, where im coming from when guys ask me how long they should wait before moving on but the rule is more of a guideline. not something set in stone. once you get more experienced, you should EASILY to learn more about a girl within 3 dates such as to be able to spot a girl thats likely a virgin. thus, most guys are not coming from that level of experience and should stick to the guidelines. op was simply lucky enough instinctively go with the positive signs or simply had no other options but to wait it out
Yeah the rules are designed to tske someone from being complete AFC to the complete opposite end of the spectrum. Once you learn enough, you realize many times being that far to the other side hurts you more than helps you.
 

way2smart

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Going through my alerts, and saw this. Good stuff.

I was like the only person in that other thread telling you to get back inset, and i took flack for that :D

You sound boyfriend-zoned though. Made to wait for sex, and she's already got in to your social-circle.

Still, if it's ltr you want (don't recall you stating a preferance) then not a big deal.

Happy days :D
Funny thing is i always expected very hot girls to be sloots, apprently not, probably due to their high self esteem or something.

For some reason all average lookimg girls are complete sloots with very high milage.

I am not particularly looking for LTR, but i am keeping an open mind about this one, depending how she turns out.

Seriosuly i can’t wrap my head around the fact how such a hot girl didn’t loose her virginity sooner
 

CMNILS87

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No don't do that. That's the opposite of subtle.

When she asks what you did last night, just mention you hung out with "my friend Sarah" or whatever her name is. Then when she asks who Sarah is, just smile and say don't worry about it. Let her wonder who she is and what you did. Just deflect and change the subject, because really, you don't owe her any explanation since you're not exclusive.

Has she been to your place yet? Assuming of course other girls have left stuff behind at your place, like hair clips, etc., strategically leave them in a place she would notice it. Sounds nuts but girls notice that kind of thing. She'll think "Whose hair scrunchy is that?!?" and get more attracted to you without even realizing it.
If you have this girl as high priority and want to continue to date her, do not bring up another woman even to drop a name. Just say hanging out with friends. You could make a good girl go cold playing the player card. She’ll see right through that and take it super slow and keep you in the distance.
 

AriMamba

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She is probably just not ready yet.

Might be one of those girls who need to really trust you and believe you plan to stick around before getting sexual. Consider yourself lucky to find a woman who (maybe) doesn't have a stretched out vagina lol.
Dont wanna be that guy but having a lot of sex doesn’t stretch a womans vagina. They are born tight or loose.
 

marmel75

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Funny thing is i always expected very hot girls to be sloots, apprently not, probably due to their high self esteem or something.

For some reason all average lookimg girls are complete sloots with very high milage.

I am not particularly looking for LTR, but i am keeping an open mind about this one, depending how she turns out.

Seriosuly i can’t wrap my head around the fact how such a hot girl didn’t loose her virginity sooner
I wouldnt 100% believe this unless she bled when you banged her. This could be an attempted mind-fvck by her.
 

marmel75

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Dont wanna be that guy but having a lot of sex doesn’t stretch a womans vagina. They are born tight or loose.
I know right? That sh!t snaps back in place pretty quickly..now having a kid or two on the orher hand...
 

AriMamba

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I know right? That sh!t snaps back in place pretty quickly..now having a kid or two on the orher hand...
In my experience women that have had kids are suprisingly tight.... i cant explain why
 

way2smart

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I wouldnt 100% believe this unless she bled when you banged her. This could be an attempted mind-fvck by her.
Yes she bled a lot. Based on my previous expenrience with popping the cherry it felt exactly like she was virgin
 

marmel75

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Yes she bled a lot. Based on my previous expenrience with popping the cherry it felt exactly like she was virgin
Ok...well props to you then :cool:

Just play it cool this chick is going to be in love with you.
 

lizardking82

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I would say these two things to you:

1) You're considered boyfriend material. For now, you're the shiny new thing and you could possibly be This girl could be yours for a long time as she seems like a keeper, but you HAVE, absolutely HAVE to guide the relationship. If you hesitate and start to get comfortable, she will leave you.

2) Experiment sexually. Blow her mind. Play with her. Make her *** just by fingering and then don't have sex. Do things. She will be expecting them from you.
 

lizardking82

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Are you sure?
A woman's vagina is not that stretched when she has sex with one penis for a long time. The vagina muscles are made to expand when the penis is in and they reverse back to normal after that. But if you get rammed by different types of big penises on a regular basis, of course the muscles will lose it and you become looser, something that happens with prostitutes in general for example.
 
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