No texting for 5 days, but a second date set. She's a super slow texter

[Rambo92]

Had a great first date with a girl, she couldn't keep her hands off me, asking questions, laughing and wouldn't let me go when we kissed at the end. I felt comfortable enough to stop her in the street and randomly kiss halfway through the date as well, something I've never done before. I usually stick to the end of the date, but tried something different.

She always took hours to reply before the date, but I texted her the next evening and asked when she was next free to get together. She said that night "Yeah it was really fun I think I'm free next Saturday if that suits you x".

I reply the following morning as my phone was off saying I'm free Saturday and we'll meet at [place] at 6pm.

Nine hours later she calls me but it quickly rings off, guessing accidental. She then texts saying "Is this another secret date activity? Any chance you could do Friday instead? Don't worry if not x".

Ten minutes after that I decide to call her, instead of reply to her text. The call went great and she seemed upbeat, awwing, giggling, etc, although she wondered who it was at first and said my number came through as unknown (I had no caller ID on by accident).

That was on Sunday and we agreed the date for this Friday. Seeing as she doesn't seem big on texting and that, is it okay to not have any contact until the date? As I follow a rule that the phone is for setting dates, not chit chat. She did mention on the first date that she was very curious about me because I wouldn't reveal anything about myself over text, compared with other guys she spoke to and that she had to meet me to find out.

Okay to not text until date, unless she reaches out? Some suggest getting in touch to keep the momentum going and to allow her to remember how good the first date was, but not too sure on this.

Looking to learn!

 

[RedScorpion]

Yep, that sounds fine, to have not any contact until the date. I might confirm that she's still good to go on the day of (friday), since it is a few days away. But otherwise, sounds like it's going well. If she does text you about something, that's fine too.

 

[Rambo92]

Yep, that sounds fine, to have not any contact until the date. I might confirm that she's still good to go on the day of (friday), since it is a few days away. But otherwise, sounds like it's going well. If she does text you about something, that's fine too.

Would sending a text a couple of days before like “Hope your week is going great. Looking forward to Friday” be okay? As it doesn’t request an answer but confirms to her that we’re still on etc.

 

[Rambo92]

you built plenty of rapport already.

now you build attraction (usually its the other way around)

neg her (teasing)
take longer to reply
dominance
mystery
charm

etc.

any specific questions feel free to ask

This is all what I was doing on the date and it does work, she was all over me. Was just wondering if a simple “Hope you’ve not been telling too many kids off this week. Looking forward to Friday”. In context, she’s a teacher and told me about a time when she had to tell a kid off which resulted in a funny story.

 

[marmel75]

You seem to be doing a lot of rationalizing and justification with this girl. I know, we've all done it. Dont be surprised if this is a last minute flake. Something doesn't seem right here.

 

[Rambo92]

How so? I know before our first date she was a terrible texter, took a while to reply but she’d respond with a quality text and agreed to the date.

I’d be certain she accidentally called me as it rang off quickly and then she replied. All reasons seem to be justifiable.

 

[Rambo92]

I may be the minority but i think your on the vurge of seeming to eager. Not desperate but eager.
Telling a girl "i hope your week is going well inbetween 1 and date number 2 may be ok but more often then not is not a good idea.

Shes a teacher and more then capable of keeping an appointment. I would just see her at the next meet. Let her do her thing and you do yours.

Could eager be an okay thing if not overdone? Just I don’t want to appear the opposite and look like a cold fish. So I’d guess a couple of more dates down the line then I’ll be okay to say that stuff.

On our last date I went a couple of days of no response from her then she asked for a confirmation in the morning about where we’d be meeting, etc.

Just wondering if 5 days is too long with no contact.. But don’t forget, I did initiate a phone call on Sunday night so I have done my job. It’d be up to her to reach out if she wanted to, I guess. She’s sent the most recent text but I made the phone call to reply to it.

If I reach out again then I’ll be the one chasing. Plus it leaves a bit of mystery about what I’m doing.

 

[dude99]

Would sending a text a couple of days before like “Hope your week is going great. Looking forward to Friday” be okay? As it doesn’t request an answer but confirms to her that we’re still on etc.

It makes you look too thirsty.

Don't do it.

 

[BeExcellent]

Advice from the old lady:

I think 5 days no contact does get a little long in the tooth, especially if she is attractive (she will have other options hanging round).

When a woman likes a man she does hope to hear from him. Not too much...but a little. Contact in and of itself is not bad just don't get caught up in a long exchange.

If you are in US it's Thanksgiving week right? Easy. Sometime on Thursday you send:

"Happy Turkey! See you tomorrow"

And that's it. That way you acknowledge her, you acknowledge the date and you get points for reaching out on the holiday. Simple.

 

[EmotionalGeek]

you built plenty of rapport already.

now you build attraction (usually its the other way around)

neg her (teasing)
take longer to reply
dominance
mystery
charm

etc.

any specific questions feel free to ask

What kind of behaviours do you call charming?

 

[Rambo92]

Advice from the old lady:

I think 5 days no contact does get a little long in the tooth, especially if she is attractive (she will have other options hanging round).

When a woman likes a man she does hope to hear from him. Not too much...but a little. Contact in and of itself is not bad just don't get caught up in a long exchange.

If you are in US it's Thanksgiving week right? Easy. Sometime on Thursday you send:

"Happy Turkey! See you tomorrow"

And that's it. That way you acknowledge her, you acknowledge the date and you get points for reaching out on the holiday. Simple.

I’m from the UK, but I like the example.. Maybe I could roll with “Hope you’re having a good week, see you tomorrow”. At least I’m not looking as eager then , rather than the “looking forward to the date” text i was going to send.

She told me on the first date a lot the guys she goes on a date with seems to text her a lot revealing things about them, but she was intrigued why I didn’t. I also had the confidence to kiss her halfway through the date which got a response “very smooth”. A lot of guys wouldn’t work up that courage so I should be up there in the confidence game.

It’s all guesswork but I’m assuming she has a different date on Saturday and possibly why she asked to move ours, but I’ll just have to be better! Obviously it could be something else like family or friends.

 

[Rambo92]

People will say "ignore texting". But I find that a bullsh!t

She is plate material. A slam piece. Keep up the approaching, and don't be such a lazy b!tch.

As long as she’s going on dates with me, then all is well. I’m under the rule that texting is only for setting up dates, which helps so I’m not initiating and chasing a ton. If she’s dying for my attention and wants to reach out then I’ll reply but keep it fun and banterous, none of that getting to know you stuff.

She tried that before our first date and I kept being secretive and saying she’ll have to wait. Possibly why she isn’t reaching out because she knows I’ll get her to wait until she sees me.

 

[marmel75]

I’m from the UK, but I like the example.. Maybe I could roll with “Hope you’re having a good week, see you tomorrow”. At least I’m not looking as eager then , rather than the “looking forward to the date” text i was going to send.

She told me on the first date a lot the guys she goes on a date with seems to text her a lot revealing things about them, but she was intrigued why I didn’t. I also had the confidence to kiss her halfway through the date which got a response “very smooth”. A lot of guys wouldn’t work up that courage so I should be up there in the confidence game.

It’s all guesswork but I’m assuming she has a different date on Saturday and possibly why she asked to move ours, but I’ll just have to be better! Obviously it could be something else like family or friends.

If you were doing that I would have went with "Looking forward to seeing you tomorrow...make sure to wear something sexy "

 

[Rambo92]

If you were doing that I would have went with "Looking forward to seeing you tomorrow...make sure to wear something sexy "

Is it okay to say you’re looking forward to seeing them after one date? Don’t want to appear too eager

 

[Thorninmyside]

Is it okay to say you’re looking forward to seeing them after one date? Don’t want to appear too eager

Comes across as too much of a feeler text.

Instead of asking how her week is going, send her a picture of how awesome yours is going instead, like a kick-ass meal you are eating at a restaurant to get her wheels spinning about what you are doing and who you are with.

Make her wonder how your week is going.

 

[marmel75]

Is it okay to say you’re looking forward to seeing them after one date? Don’t want to appear too eager

Haha...when you have had a lot of success and are very good on dates you stop caring about all this other nonsense and do whatever you want.

I've said this in the past and it worked out well. If you have picqued her interest in you not much you can say will change that.

The second part shows sexual intent and will mitigate the first part of you are that worried...remember...yin and yang

 

[Rambo92]

I sent her the text at 4pm “You’ll never guess what I’ve been up to this week! See you tomorrow x” and it’s now nearly 11pm with no reply.

We both agreed on the day, time and place four days ago. Do I just turn up if no reply? I don’t want to ask if we’re still on because it looks like a lack of confidence. My gut is telling me to turn up because I should be confident she’ll turn up to see me and that if she is interested she’ll remember our arranged plan. She originally asked over text if Friday was better and I replied with a phone call and we arranged it then last Sunday

 

[Fireballs]

I sent her the text at 4pm “You’ll never guess what I’ve been up to this week! See you tomorrow x” and it’s now nearly 11pm with no reply.

We both agreed on the day, time and place four days ago. Do I just turn up if no reply? I don’t want to ask if we’re still on because it looks like a lack of confidence. My gut is telling me to turn up because I should be confident she’ll turn up to see me and that if she is interested she’ll remember our arranged plan. She originally asked over text if Friday was better and I replied with a phone call and we arranged it then last Sunday

Just relax a little .. she could have left her phone at work, flat battery etc ..

However you seem very keen in almost a desperate way which I'm sure she is sensing too so I'd be preparing mentally for a flake ..

Also drop the 'x' from your texting

 

[marmel75]

I sent her the text at 4pm “You’ll never guess what I’ve been up to this week! See you tomorrow x” and it’s now nearly 11pm with no reply.

We both agreed on the day, time and place four days ago. Do I just turn up if no reply? I don’t want to ask if we’re still on because it looks like a lack of confidence. My gut is telling me to turn up because I should be confident she’ll turn up to see me and that if she is interested she’ll remember our arranged plan. She originally asked over text if Friday was better and I replied with a phone call and we arranged it then last Sunday

I predicted a flake was the most likely outcome from the beginning, let's see if I am right.

 

[The Diver]

I also had the confidence to kiss her halfway through the date which got a response “very smooth”. A lot of guys wouldn’t work up that courage so I should be up there in the confidence game..

From the Sixteen commandments of poon:

Be irrationally self-confident. Irrational self-confidence will get you more p***y than rational defeatism.

Err on the side of too much boldness, rather than too little
Touching a woman inappropriately on the first date will get you further with her than not touching her at all.