Feeling like my girl is cheating?

[MountainSlide]

Okay so my girlfriend recently moved, and told me that it was to this other girls house, and she claims she doesn’t want me to go there because it is too ghetto, but I’ve never met the person and am not sure that she even exists lol. I haven’t had sex with her for over a week, she claims that it’s because of a medical issue that she’s been having (non std) but requiring antibiotics lol, but she slept at my house last night and I had to take her to her moms because she said she didn’t have them, and again this morning she said that she had to go to her moms to take the antibiotics (why wouldn’t she have just brought them, are there really any antibiotics or is she just making this **** up cause she doesn’t want to bang and her mom gives her smokes). She told me she was with a dude the other day, who supposedly has a girlfriend that she’s best friends with, who was supposedly also there, and then her phone was off for three hours, and she said she fell asleep (mid day). She used to Snapchat all the time and now seems to never snap chat (probably all private). At nighttime she never answers my calls and doesn’t call back when she says she will, although is completely available to text. Always has an excuse like it’s loud in here but a lot of the time her excuses don’t even make sense. She’ll still message me all night about how much she cares for me and blah blah blah but refuses the call. I just started feeling like everything she is telling me is a lie, and there exists zero verification of whether or not she’s honest. I was with my friend the other night and this girl that I’ve known for a long time (she was hitting on me lol but I shut her down) and I woke up in the morning and apparently she phoned my friend grilling him for answers about what we had done, and she called me accusing me of cheating.

I don’t know. Normally I’m not a very jealous person and don’t worry, but my gut is telling me that I’m being played here. What do you guys think? Am I overthinking **** or does this sound suspicious?

 

[marmel75]

Yeah this is extremely suspicious. I would probably sit down with her and just be up front and if she doesnt provide you with the response you are looking for just be prepared to end it.

 

[MountainSlide]

Yeah this is extremely suspicious. I would probably sit down with her and just be up front and if she doesnt provide you with the response you are looking for just be prepared to end it.

I did, and she denies denies denies.

 

[RedScorpion]

You've probably got the right feeling here. Especially I think, since she's accused you of cheating. Pretty classic projection (cheaters usually accuse their partners of cheating). Avoiding communication and meetings, avoiding sex... ever so potentially has an explanation... maybe. But seems awfully suspicious.

Be calm, collect your emotions, know for yourself on how you want to handle any potential situation. I've give her a bit more time to come back around, but that's just for yourself to clear up any remaining doubt in your head, rather than later on thinking "Man, I ****ed it up because I was jealous/insecure, maybe it was just nothing" or some ****.

If you feel you have figured enough out, and it's not good - you can figure how you want to handle it from there.

 

[MountainSlide]

You've probably got the right feeling here. Especially I think, since she's accused you of cheating. Pretty classic projection (cheaters usually accuse their partners of cheating). Avoiding communication and meetings, avoiding sex... ever so potentially has an explanation... maybe. But seems awfully suspicious.

Be calm, collect your emotions, know for yourself on how you want to handle any potential situation. I've give her a bit more time to come back around, but that's just for yourself to clear up any remaining doubt in your head, rather than later on thinking "Man, I ****ed it up because I was jealous/insecure, maybe it was just nothing" or some ****.

If you feel you have figured enough out, and it's not good - you can figure how you want to handle it from there.

Lol I had even mentioned to her when she was accusing me that it’s what people that are guilty do when they project their guilt.

 

[marmel75]

I did, and she denies denies denies.

Then decide what you want to do and act on it. Nobody here can tell you if she is or isnt, you know far more details than we do.

 

[El Payaso]

You shouldn't have asked her if she was cheating. What did you expect her to say? "Oh, honey. Yes, you're right. I've been sucking off and ****ing another guy for a long time now."

Of course not. She's gonna deny it. The signs point to a high possibility that she's cheating but it is best to have solid evidence before breaking up with her.

You could also just break up with her without evidence if you don't want headaches and stress from worrying about all this.

 

[MountainSlide]

Then decide what you want to do and act on it. Nobody here can tell you if she is or isnt, you know far more details than we do.

**** man. I know what you mean, but i feel like my judgement is clouded by emotions. On the one hand, she sounds honest when she says she wouldn’t do that. On the other hand I have this overwhelming feeling that something isn’t right. when we had plans for this evening, and I tried calling her when I got off work, she didn’t answer my call, and instead said that she was with her sister and her sister’s boyfriend and they were driving listening to loud music so she couldn’t talk. She said she’d call me when it was quieter which she didn’t, She told me yesterday that she has a guy friend that’s only in town until tomorrow. I don’t know. Another thing that stands out to me, she said that she was at the hospital over her infection and they ran an std check and that it was clean, but don’t those take several days to get a result from?? Also I tried calling her later just to see if she’d answer and she didn’t.

 

[MountainSlide]

You shouldn't have asked her if she was cheating. What did you expect her to say? "Oh, honey. Yes, you're right. I've been sucking off and ****ing another guy for a long time now."

Of course not. She's gonna deny it. The signs point to a high possibility that she's cheating but it is best to have solid evidence before breaking up with her.

You could also just break up with her without evidence if you don't want headaches and stress from worrying about all this.

It was in an already heated conversation. Not like a friendly sit down. But thanks. I’ll remember that for the future.

 

[Julian]

these hoes aint loyal


the lies ive seen girls spit without even thinking..man...it would fk up ur mind.


if i was you i would bang another girl ASAP

 

[MountainSlide]

When she started grilling my friend over what we were doing, it was 2:00am in the morning, he said that she texted him, and he tried calling her, but she didn’t answer. She started grilling him over text message. I bet she was laying in bed with another ****ing dude.

 

[Asasione]

**** man. I know what you mean, but i feel like my judgement is clouded by emotions. On the one hand, she sounds honest when she says she wouldn’t do that. On the other hand I have this overwhelming feeling that something isn’t right. when we had plans for this evening, and I tried calling her when I got off work, she didn’t answer my call, and instead said that she was with her sister and her sister’s boyfriend and they were driving listening to loud music so she couldn’t talk. She said she’d call me when it was quieter which she didn’t, She told me yesterday that she has a guy friend that’s only in town until tomorrow. I don’t know. Another thing that stands out to me, she said that she was at the hospital over her infection and they ran an std check and that it was clean, but don’t those take several days to get a result from?? Also I tried calling her later just to see if she’d answer and she didn’t.

Your girl is most likely cheating and still wants to string you along. Hospitals don't do STD tests for just random infections, in fact they don't normally do them unless you ask or they strongly suspect you have one. She could have herpes or something screwed up that needs a specific test to find. I would give an unannounced visit to this place she stays but at this point the evidence is so clear that she's a cheater I don't see the point. Just cut your losses and leave this girl, stop second guessing yourself, its not worth it staying with her with these kinds of behaviors.

 

[MountainSlide]

Your girl is most likely cheating and still wants to string you along. Hospitals don't do STD tests for just random infections, in fact they don't normally do them unless you ask or they strongly suspect you have one. She could have herpes or something screwed up that needs a specific test to find. I would give an unannounced visit to this place she stays but at this point the evidence is so clear that she's a cheater I don't see the point. Just cut your losses and leave this girl, stop second guessing yourself, its not worth it staying with her with these kinds of behaviors.

When she was there, I asked for a pin to go and visit her and she wouldn’t share with me where she was. To be honest, I have no idea where she’s living, who she’s living with, or wtf is going on. Funny enough she had me pick her up at her moms last time. She probably had her new guy drop her off there, so I could pick her up, and she could keep it all separated.

 

[lizardking82]

Your gut feeling is telling you that she is deceiving you. Be smart, follow that gut feeling and leave this girl alone.

 

[QuadDeuces]

That fear in the gut never lies my friend.
The solar plexus is connected to the quantum field of universal consciousness.

 

[Roober]

Always judge a woman by her actions, not her words. Talk is cheap!

Your approach should be determined by how committed you are to this woman. For example, if you view it as a short time thing, you may be best served by just distancing yourself a bit (make her initiate, hang out to fvck, etc.). If it is something serious, you would want to take the other approach for dealing with women. Treat her like a little sister until you get information from her.

I was just having this conversation with my girl last night. How do you know when to cut the cord or when to keep pushing? Not an easy choice.

From the little detail you presented, some of it sounds suspicious, but some of it sounds like insecurity. The main thing is whether or not this is an actual change in her behavior, or your just overthinking?

 

[marmel75]

Yeah there is a lot going on here that isnt right. I'd be out.

 

[derby1]

OP I dont mean this personal weve all been there and we all help each other sometimes were quite blunt........

have you ever read and RE-READ your Original post and realised what YOU sound like, she may aswell stick her hand up your ass and move your mouth

 

[Von]

Sounds like she ain't treating you like BF material.

Seriously, with all the unknown she's giving you... why stay?

Everything points that either 1) she cheating 2) she is nexting you 3) you are her plate

Time to move on and build your self-respect... Lying doesn't belong in a LTR... especially the ''I can't tell you where I am honey''

 

[FwoGiZ]

Once another episode of "I wanna believe in monogamy so hard but everything in the world proves me it's unreal but I'll keep hoping for it"
Dude, you are fckin golden here man... you have your own place, she has her own... it's CLEAR what she wants. She wants YOU, but also other dudes! No biggie with that........ don't tell me you don't want other chicks.
Get out there, spin plates and let her be one of your plate! Simple as that..... You are slowly turning her off with all the insecurity and the neediness... I don't blame you. You clearly hoping for something serious with this chicks and I hate to say it won't happen so you got 2 choices. Keep her spinning or drop her. I'd keep her spinning and bang other chicks on the side... if she's not cool with that well at least you'll have some other chick lined up Hell, she doesn't even need to know what you're doing and if she ever gives you **** for it, just put on big smile and tell her that she's got quite some balls to accuse you of exactly what she's doing too. Be nice, explain you enjoy spending time with her and understand she enjoys other dudes too and that you're cool with it, you just don't wanna know and hear about it? "Let's keep this on the downlow and just keep our relationship respectful and simple... if you don't wanna do that I'll understand and not hold grudges and we can just part ways"

Fact is... it doesn't seem like she's trying to suck money out of ya, or sperm jack you or anything malicious. It really seem like she's hoping for you to be a side plate for her and she's just completely oblivious how to proceed with that because open relationships are just frowned upon, too many guys with insecurities issues out there calling other dudes that do that, cucks.