Are we too bitter or are we just realistic?

[btownbuck2012]

What are your thoughts on this?

At times I feel like this forum has shifted a bit too far from advice on how to meet women, date them, f*ck them and form LTRs with them

BUT

I also feel like the potential for all of the aforementioned above to completely ruin a man is so great if he doesn't know what he's up against, picks the wrong woman, etc. that what we talk about here a-lot of the time makes sense.

What are your thoughts on this? What direction should this forum take moving forward? What's the best balance of these two things?

 

[ubercat]

There s still plenty of material on dating and ltr s.

I keep it simple in my head.

Focus on the basics before skirt. Health fitness career family friends in that order.

Ok so now the foundations in place let's look at dating

Spin plates and withdraw attention for bad behaviour.

That means the better quality girls will eventually rise up the order.

Understand the nature of women and work with it. We are all in sales to some degree.

I only ltr good quality women. However the nature of a woman is going to mean she is going to exhibit behaviours occasionally which are bad from a man's point of view.

This is where your study on the nature of woman and you're time here pays off.

 

[Reykhel]

Realistic.

With eyes wide open.

 

[sazc]

You all want quality women, I get it. And you deserve that. Sometimes I wonder if some of the communications on here dont lead to self defeating behavior.

Then every female is judged based on preconceived notions without really being given a fair shot. And these preconceived notions are subtly communicated to the female (body language, conversation, etc), which has the effect of repelling her, and then the man feels as if he was right about everything. self sabotage almost

That's always been my concern.

 

[ubercat]

Absolutely. All the guys here can do for you is provide fresh ideas and perspectives and help you to identify and remove sticking points. I'd say one of the keys to not becoming bitter is try to cultivate an enquiring mind and to always be curious about people. Open ended questions like what's the story with that, how did you find that, that's an interesting thing to say y did you think that, let the other person run with the conversation and you never know what you will learn

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

Don't get bitter, get better.

Then keep one foot in realism, and the other in idealism.

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

You all want quality women, I get it. And you deserve that. Sometimes I wonder if some of the communications on here dont lead to self defeating behavior.

Then every female is judged based on preconceived notions without really being given a fair shot. And these preconceived notions are subtly communicated to the female (body language, conversation, etc), which has the effect of repelling her, and then the man feels as if he was right about everything. self sabotage almost

That's always been my concern.

Something I noticed in a couple of interactions I had recently, was that I was a bit too blase about it all.

 

[sodbuster]

I got mine, but I had to import her... Women today are just like the big 3 automakers in the 70's. WHY would you want an import? Our cars are great.... except they weren't. Now I'd say about half the cars on the road are imports and the big 3 had to improve the quality of their product to keep that half. IF they would have worked on quality in the beginning of the competition, there wouldn't have been one......

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

Conversation primarily. It can be difficult not to confront obvious delusions directly or indirectly but the net result is just showing your hand.

I'll tell you one thing: noticing the sad state of affairs for men in the game is just self-deprecation to a woman. She sees you as projecting your own failings. She wants to see you as a 1% male that can have any woman he wants and you are telling her it's hard to find anyone good. She then simply puts you outside the 1%, who would not in 1 million years every experience such things much less discuss them. I use this example a lot but I have discussed the difficulty for me to get a ONS or a quality woman a few times with females and they are just absolutely amazed...But why am I trying to convince them otherwise?!?!

The "blue pill" is what women love, even though they violate it constantly. Romance exists here. If she knows you are operating completely outside of that, the fun is gone for her. There are aspects of the blue pill paradigm you can use to your advantage. There is room within the blue pill paradigm for all types of male roles.

Yes, avoid third person conversations with women. Keep it second person.

 

[vorbis]

There's definitely a lot of bitterness in this forum.
There's plenty of posters here who write off the vast majority of women in the US.
It'd be challenging to have good interactions with women if you start with that opinion.

There's still some good advice here though at times.

 

[Trump]

Sometimes I wonder if some of the communications on here dont lead to self defeating behavior.

Then every female is judged based on preconceived notions without really being given a fair shot. And these preconceived notions are subtly communicated to the female (body language, conversation, etc), which has the effect of repelling her, and then the man feels as if he was right about everything. self sabotage almost

The issue is you have to judge a female on preconceived notions and past experiences. If you go in blindly and the gender is allowed to do what they do, with the law, state and society on their side, you will be destroyed.

As you know women are emotional and can manipulate to get what they want while men cannot. Having this edge, you have to go in any meeting or relationship with any female very carefully. It's 2017.

I think Poon said it best. A quality woman is one who knows she can't do any better. If she thinks she can, she will make life hell for you.

 

[SgtSplacker]

Realistic


I use my own judgment when exercising the practices here. If she's a good girl I loosen up a little. If she's sheisty I follow the rules to the letter.

 

[ubercat]

It's pretty straightforward really. Rewards them with attention and Beta throws when they are behaving well. When they are not either call them out on their sh1t or withdraw attention. One of the Psychological principles that baffles man with woman is guilt by Association. If every time she is in a bad mood you sit down and try and talk her out of it you will become associated with her bad moods. Far better to say I hope you feel better soon sweetie and then go disappear and do your own thing.

 

[Scaramouche]

G'day Uber,
Just a question,what happened to your Chinese Sheilahs?...Somewhere along the line you found an antidote to Yellow fever?

 

[Scaramouche]

Hi Sodbuster,
Like always I agree with your post,but not your dismissal of American Cars...Until six months ago I was the Owner of a 1987 Ford Wagon I had it for about half a million miles...Tough miles,I was running a Building Business as well as my Academic Career...There were periods in excess of two years when I never put a spanner on it,never even changed the Oil...Never once broke down to the extent that I needed a tow.....Never had any major repairs on it,reluctantly I took it to the wreckers as the steel in the front end was terribly fatigued,couldn't hold a ball joint!...At that time,it ran cool,never burned Oil,started first turn of the key and pulled my Caravan up the biggest hills...I replaced it with the same model but having only a bit over 100.000 on the clock...My experience of Yank Tanks Packards,Chevs,Canadian Fords and US Fords has been entirely positive...Just Saying.

 

[speed dawg]

You all want quality women, I get it. And you deserve that. Sometimes I wonder if some of the communications on here dont lead to self defeating behavior.

Why? I'm not agreeing or disagreeing. Curious.

 

[sazc]

Why? I'm not agreeing or disagreeing. Curious.

Sometimes I just worry that SOME of the guidance offered here will actually attract females that are more wishy washy than "stable" - and from what I read, those of you that are looking for LTRs have difficulty with females that come off interested and then pull back without reason

 

[glass half full]

sazc, no offense but.. how would you take it if a man you really liked came off interested and then pulled back without reason?

of course you're a woman, therefore you know you'll always have options. But if you really really liked the guy, how would you feel?

I'm curious

 

[ubercat]

@Scaramouche Nope don't want the antidote. Aussie girls pain my ears my tolerance just isn't what it used to be. Just passed the 1 year mark with my Chinese nursie. Of course we have our blowups. They all love a bit of drama But she s smart funny hard working loyal submissive in the bedroom likes to look after me. Of course I know the score - it could all end tomorrow. But until then why wouldn't you go with what is better

 

[sazc]

sazc, no offense but.. how would you take it if a man you really liked came off interested and then pulled back without reason?

of course you're a woman, therefore you know you'll always have options. But if you really really liked the guy, how would you feel?

I'm curious

OMG I've had that happen and it is THE most confusing thing ever. This was over a the week period. We went on a few dates, had a bunch in common, talked about future dates, etc, etc, etc, and then he started to pull away. A week later, after very sparse contact, he says he's not on the same page, but looking fur what I was looking for.

I was so confused, did I miss read him? Was i too "available"? I finally decided that he either got cold feet or we really only looking for a lay.

It's really confusing when it happens. Doesn't feel good at all.