How do you guys effectively manage your life & accomplish goals?

[mellow_yellow]

I work 50+ hours per week because I have to deal with overseas contacts in Asia. I have a list of tasks and goals I want to get done, but I barely make a dent in them because of work stress. I constantly feel like I'm on call by day and night. In the back of my mind, I know I need to force in the time to improve myself now to reap the benefits in my 30s. While work is on my mind, I know that I need to getting my own sh*t done.

Ideally, I need to block out my free time and create routines like working out in the morning and developing your side business at night. Using these as examples, I find that what makes these hard to execute is that you have to study fitness and learn how to operate a business as you go along. It can be an information overload.

We all have limited time and cannot research for hours on end and exert hour of effort to achieve 10 goals at once. So one solution I've heard is to choose 3 of the most important goals and focus. And of course, learning to game women well is another goal involving a large time investment. My guess is that you experienced guys are focusing on self-development first, which in turn attracts everything else in life, including women.

How do you guys get all your sh*t done and squeeze the women in? I think your insights will help me and others here since we're all about becoming the best man possible.

 

[logicallefty]

It's tough I'm right there with you. I work 40 hrs at a job I can't stand and another 8-16 hrs at two part time jobs that I like. I keep an intense to do list which is broken down by categories.Every day I make sure to work on multiple from various categories of the list like study goals, exercise, home projects, finances, legal matters, day to day tasks, errands, etc. it is extremely easy to get so caught up in everything fired at you on a daily basis that you don't take the time to do the longer-term stuff. You have to be disciplined and reach a point where you say I have done enough little piddly stuff today it's time to move on to some longer-term stuff. My big things right now are a legal case where I represent myself, A computer forensics certification, and cleaning up some junk that's been laying around my house for several years. I try to hit each one sometime at least every other day between all the little peanut stuff that flies at me on a daily basis. Life is busy for everybody. I think there is an a single human being (who isn't lazy )Who does not have more on their plate than they can handle. You just have to keep plowing forward a blob at a time.

 

[resilient]

I can relate. I work full time while full time student. I'm wrapping up an undergrad program and striving towards getting into grad school.

Plate spinning is tricky... Before I was active physically and socially, I stayed at home often watching Netflix, DVR, or playing video games on consoles and on a portable Nintendo 3DS XL. I was so boring as all hell and had low social calibration. I sucked at conversing and making others laugh. I felt like a wallflower.

It's all about balance and life goals. It's good to revaluate what your top three priorities are in life when you're trying to achieve those ten goals at once.

My top 3 right now:
1) Apply/Get into grad school
2) Marriage annulment
3) Make smart financial decisions / Stay debt free as possible / No impulse buys / No huge purchases (I would love love love to buy a Jeep Wrangler, Grand Cheeroke to explore tough terrain, yet I'm resisting trading in the commuter car or purchasing as a second vehicle until I know how the grad school situation turns out.)

You said working towards your top 10 goals, what specifically are your top three priorities? If it's too specific, be general enough.

I admire your courage to do this at 26, I didn't really start to make better prudent life decisions until I was 33. I'm not perfect by all means, yet I can see improvements across the board.

One of the great things about success and achieving your goals in life is that you refuel your confidence in self-actualizing. People pick up on that and are drawn to your drive. Keep it up, man. Work hard, strive hard, yet don't be too hard on yourself. Treat yourself to something fun now and then to reward your drive.

 

[ubercat]

What about just hiring a jeep for the weekend. Of course u ll pay a premium but it will b peanuts compared to purchase and running costs

 

[resilient]

@ubercat. That's a smart idea, man! I don't know why I didn't think of that for a weekend or week. Def. cheaper than buying a new vehicle, registering it, insurance, etc.

 

[sodbuster]

What no one tells you is "you can have it all.... just not all at once". Everyone leaves off the second part. List the important things you want to do tomorrow, get them done and fit the rest in as time allows. You've heard the story about the professor and the glass jar he fills with golf balls right?

 

[Mike32ct]

This is a great question. Yes, life CAN get in the way of your goals if you let it.

First, you have to consider if it's a long term goal or short term goal.

Short term goals can be best achieved by blocking off a bunch of time at once and going at it aggressively. To get to LogicalLefty's cleaning clutter example, it took me two weeks of hard work on nights and weekends to clean my house. I rented a dumpster for one week and spent a week filling it with junk and trash. I spent the second week cleaning and vacuuming.

For a long term goal like getting in great shape or learning a language, then you have to block off maybe an hour or two per day for long period of time.

 

[guru1000]

^^Men, pay attention and let this soak in.

It took me five years of 14-hour days, 7-day weeks to build a lucrative business. Was it worth it? Abso-fvcken-lutely.

If you want to achieve greatly, then create only one exit, your death. Giving up is not an option.

Goes back to Hill's concept of burning your boat. You have ten war natives on an island. You have a crew of five men. Outside of calculated war strategy, what is the best way to ensure victory and kill all the natives? Burn the boat. Now you have no way off the island. Win or die.

 

[resilient]

I like the burn the boat strategy. It's like believing there's no path back to the beach or the sunken boat; only forward.

One of the statements PK made in a discussion thread is simple yet spoke volumes to me before he got banned that I have mounted for me to see every day: "achieve your goals, or die trying". To me that resonates with my prime directive to transition out my career from a dying career to a more secure profession 2-4 years.

I may pursue hobbies, plates, health fitness goals, read, etc. yet at the top of list and in the middle of my radar will be the career goal so I can achieve greater financial independence. I feel like many other avenues will fall into place and feel more secure when I've successfully transitioned the career.

To me... there's no motivation to get serious with any particular plate or turn a main plate into a LTR until the career path is realized.

 

[englishman]

I'm a bit of an old dude at 55 and I'm worth over a million + I've achieved some pretty significant milestones in my life.

I've run the whole spectrum from being broke and doing things asz backwards to being financially independent and reasonably having my stuff together.

I would say that the one thing I did wrong that I'd do different is to get and keep my sh1t together financially and to have a job that I can tolerate. (thats 2 things I guess)

Look at it this way; If you want to do this and do that and it takes this amount of energy and that amount of money..... then you have to have that time and energy to spare.

But if you have a job that exhausts you and you live a lifestyle that costs as much or more than you earn..... you'll never have that time and energy.

Sure you can burn the candle at both ends and extend your credit and things like that, but theres nothing as good as living a lifestyle that costs say $3000 a month and earning $4000 a month and doing it at a job that you can tolerate.

Instead of maybe earning $4000 a month and spending $4500 then financing the extra on credit cards for years, working a job that just sucks.

I did that for years and looking back I'm like WTF was I thinking.

 

[lifeislearning]

I work 50+ hours per week because I have to deal with overseas contacts in Asia. I have a list of tasks and goals I want to get done, but I barely make a dent in them because of work stress. I constantly feel like I'm on call by day and night. In the back of my mind, I know I need to force in the time to improve myself now to reap the benefits in my 30s. While work is on my mind, I know that I need to getting my own sh*t done.

Ideally, I need to block out my free time and create routines like working out in the morning and developing your side business at night. Using these as examples, I find that what makes these hard to execute is that you have to study fitness and learn how to operate a business as you go along. It can be an information overload.

We all have limited time and cannot research for hours on end and exert hour of effort to achieve 10 goals at once. So one solution I've heard is to choose 3 of the most important goals and focus. And of course, learning to game women well is another goal involving a large time investment. My guess is that you experienced guys are focusing on self-development first, which in turn attracts everything else in life, including women.

How do you guys get all your sh*t done and squeeze the women in? I think your insights will help me and others here since we're all about becoming the best man possible.

Women was what I cut out Got a few years on you, and am a bit into your plan. Good job that is moving me up soon, where I can learn for free. Business starting to get a lil buzz, and working out 3-4 times per week packing some meat on my skinny ass. I cook 90% of my meals and am trying to expand the social life. That struggles, women are the worst.

Really had to be interested enough to take time from your business, and when you're really interested, your thoughts are distracting you, or you don't put in the effort. You CAN do it all, just not all at the same time. Sacrifice women, hold social steady and improve what I can.

I have big plans though and can wait a couple years.

 

[lifeislearning]

What no one tells you is "you can have it all.... just not all at once". Everyone leaves off the second part. List the important things you want to do tomorrow, get them done and fit the rest in as time allows. You've heard the story about the professor and the glass jar he fills with golf balls right?

What's the story?

 

[sodbuster]

A professor brought a big jar into class, filled it with golf balls and asked the class if it was full. They agreed it was, so he got out a bunch of pebbles, poured them in and shook the jar until they settled in the gaps of the golf balls. Again, he asked if it was full. They again agreed. He got out some sand and shook that into the spaces between the balls and the pebbles. Again, he asked if it was full. They said it was, and then he poured a beer into it.

He said IF you handle the big things first {golf balls}, there's time to get the smaller things done as well {pebbles and sand} But if you fill life up with the sand, you don't have room for the golf balls {big things}. They got around to asking about the beer. He said, "you always have some time for a beer with friends"

 

[RalphaWreck]

5 second rule. I make the decision to get whatever it is I need to get doneverything within 5 seconds. If you wait more than 5 seconds the brain begins rationalizing why getting it done can be done later or not at all.
So that is what I do. I just do it. I don't think about it I just get it done.

 

[ubercat]

Time boxing. You make a quick judgement on what the value of the task is and give it that much time. If you have dishes to do and study on the same night. So I'm going to do as many dishes as I can in the next 10 minutes and then study. It sounds too obvious to be useful but believe me it improves your focus.

 

[ubercat]

Other principle I like is pay yourself first. When your income comes in put aside some savings money first. And pay your bills. And make sure you live on that until your next pay.
A DJ should never be bored. If you run out of cash and can't go out until next week wander down to the mall do some window shopping and situational approach on whatever chicks are around. Or try a new home workout. Or learn a language you get the idea.

 

[speed dawg]

I work 50+ hours per week because I have to deal with overseas contacts in Asia. I have a list of tasks and goals I want to get done, but I barely make a dent in them because of work stress. I constantly feel like I'm on call by day and night. In the back of my mind, I know I need to force in the time to improve myself now to reap the benefits in my 30s. While work is on my mind, I know that I need to getting my own sh*t done.

Ideally, I need to block out my free time and create routines like working out in the morning and developing your side business at night. Using these as examples, I find that what makes these hard to execute is that you have to study fitness and learn how to operate a business as you go along. It can be an information overload.

We all have limited time and cannot research for hours on end and exert hour of effort to achieve 10 goals at once. So one solution I've heard is to choose 3 of the most important goals and focus. And of course, learning to game women well is another goal involving a large time investment. My guess is that you experienced guys are focusing on self-development first, which in turn attracts everything else in life, including women.

How do you guys get all your sh*t done and squeeze the women in? I think your insights will help me and others here since we're all about becoming the best man possible.

I am right there with you. I know one thing, I have not figured out a damned thing in regards to my career or my path, even though I'm well aware of my strengths and weaknesses, no matter how much time I spend thinking about it. I was getting nowhere. So I said "f*ck it", and decided to get out of debt and pile up an emergency fund. I do nothing else that costs money (outside the basics) until that's done. Then I'll go from there.

Some things I'm doing in the meantime to 'get better', for lack of a better term:

- Coaching my kid's soccer team (sounds minor, but has me WAY out of my comfort zone)
- Continue to exercise and lose weight
- Finish this long book I've been reading for like 2 years

Some things I MIGHT try once the debt stuff is done:

- Move to another city and do a different job (albeit in the same field)
- Brazilian Jiu Jitsu
- Learn Spanish/Italian

 

[Fruitbat]

I have been going through a similar process in reverse.

Careful analysis of goals is what is required.

I recently decided that I have been living an unauthentic life. My goals were centred around a need to be accepted or admired. For example, my old "loose" goals were something like this:

- Earn loads of money, well, more than my mates in similar positions so I can brag a bit harder than I have done.
- Get really buff so I can get laid more often and look better in public.
- Get an attractive girlfriend.....just, well, someone on my arm who will turn heads so I can feel better than other men in some way.

I had a think about these and my commentary is below:


- Earn loads of money, well, more than my mates in similar positions so I can brag a bit harder than I have done.

Ego driven bull**** which, in the long run, actually turns people against you. Why have friends you want to "beat"? If your friends are in a dynamic with you like this, how many favours are they doing you?

Get really buff so I can get laid more often and look better in public.

Nothing wrong with getting buff but I am still living my goal for a female pat on the head or a high five from a man.

Get an attractive girlfriend.....just, well, someone on my arm who will turn heads so I can feel better than other men in some way.

....worst idea of all, yet so many men are ruled by this.


Recently, I have had a "road to damascas" time where I realised what I have doing wrong with my life for so long.....trying hard to fit in, to be liked etc. I have cut off from a lot of people and things, but one of the incredible benefits from basically having to start over from scratch is your life is blank slate. You are not influencing what you want from keeping up with others. I discovered I want a fairly simple, natural life away from the madness, not endless parties and socialising. I don;t want to be the CEO, or the rock star. I don't want to be an "alpha" - **** that, the effort involved in having to run a social empire. trying to do these things made me unhappy, and made my life full of trouble.

I guess I am just saying the alpha/win/bethebest/become a kung fu master with a washboard physique stuff was important once, but I can't be arsed. Life is more than just being the best or a winner. I am bright enough to get by in any conditions but I really don't see the point in missing life to be the "top dog". When I tried to be this person I just find it's trouble, you are always getting **** from people and I want an easy life. I am fed up with "me me me - I have to be the winner" guys and I won't lower myself to their stupid games and battles.