I can't believe you guys banned PK.

[Trump]

I don't want to make this another "why did you ban" Poon King thread.

But let me tell you, my girlfriend of 10 years just broke up with me because she wanted to get married (she is 37) and I told her OK, diamond ring OK, wedding OK. But you have sign something that if we get divorced, you can't come after the family company, like a prenuptial agreement. Well let me tell you, she absolutely destroyed me in an email, made it extremely personal and told me to go to hell. 10 years thrown away just like that. Down the drain because I didn't do things on her terms. Last 2 nights I've been pretty upset and lost sleep.

Ive printed most of his posts and re-read them again. Without his knowledge and wisdom, I would have emailed her back and asked for forgiveness and gave her anything she wanted to get married. I'm still a bit upset but I keep reading his posts to understand female behaviour and try to man up.

I know rules are rules and he got banned for attacking others and calling people names, but mods have to understand he was really here to HELP men win the game. Without his words, I would absolutely be lost, and likely homeless and penniless within 5 years.

 

[dude99]

You did the right thing, i know it sucks now and feels like 10 years down the toilet but in a world where marriages now, most end in divorce ( and women fully know this, ) should really be prepaired to sign prenups, because divorce always favour the women ( to which women are also 1000% fully aware of )

So if any women in todays world who has society, the law, double standards , and the war on men, on their side gets pissed because a dude wants protection? Sorry give her the husband she deserves. None.

Poon king did offer you excellent advice. Be thankful you learned it before your family business was being carved up by a bitter ex wife. He will be back.

I personally think prenups should be manditory to all marriages today. Laws have changed so much , it is about time us men change too.

 

[Urbanyst]

This forum should do things like infractions over time like a lot of other forums do.

People who violate rules get infractions on their account. Once you get a certain amount you get banned permanently. That seems like a more fair and just system than just warnings followed by a ban.

That way people see it coming and they know when they are about to reach the limit of infractions.

 

[Bible_Belt]

You should tell the ex that the pre-nup idea was just a test to see how she reacted, that you weren't really going to go through with it. But now you know she was after your money, so too bad for her. Unless you're 57, marrying a 37 y/o is a dumb idea anyway. I would only marry someone a lot younger than me.

 

[KingofPuss]

This forum should do things like infractions over time like a lot of other forums do.

People who violate rules get infractions on their account. Once you get a certain amount you get banned permanently. That seems like a more fair and just system than just warnings followed by a ban.

That way people see it coming and they know when they are about to reach the limit of infractions.

Poon King has absolutely had his chances in the past. He will be back in a while. This is nof a permanent ban

 

[Von]

Prenup are always a sensible subject.

I don't know 1 person who did the talk of Prenup and it went well for him (guys bring it)

The girl feel entitled to your succes.

What you lived is horrible but now you know how she really felt.

Its better now than later.

Take time to pick yourself up, learn from this. You took a bullet but dodged the bazooka

 

[The Duke]

I don't want to make this another "why did you ban" Poon King thread.

But let me tell you, my girlfriend of 10 years just broke up with me because she wanted to get married (she is 37) and I told her OK, diamond ring OK, wedding OK. But you have sign something that if we get divorced, you can't come after the family company, like a prenuptial agreement. Well let me tell you, she absolutely destroyed me in an email, made it extremely personal and told me to go to hell. 10 years thrown away just like that. Down the drain because I didn't do things on her terms. Last 2 nights I've been pretty upset and lost sleep.

I've had a similar story play out before. She agreed to a prenup but left when I didn't want to get married on her time frame. She wanted marriage badly for a few years and I kept putting it off.

Women are all about validation. I see 2 things that happened here.

1. She had to beg you to marry her. Doing so made her feel she wasn't good enough. Because if she was good enough you would have already asked her.

2. Asking her to sign a pre-nup further made her feel like she wasn't good enough. In her mind she saw it as she wasn't good enough to be trusted.

Any time you put a woman in a position where she has to beg to be married, it almost always ends like this. There is a window of opportunity for marriage and if you make a good girl wait too long, she'll leave every time regardless of what you say.

I guess you have to look back on those 10yrs to really judge her character. I'd hope that she was a decent girl if you kept her around for 10yrs. Be happy you got 10yrs out of the deal. Nothing lasts forever, especially relationships with women.

 

[l_e_g_e_n_d]

Mine already agreed with a prenup. I had a ring ready to give on my next meeting with her (she was not aware). And then she fvcked up thinking it was not going to happen.

Trump, I'm going to go against the grain, and say the following:

Your girl is just upset from your procrastination. Send her a text, let her know, you agree to get married, on the condition of a prenup, and get in touch with you if she changes her mind. She'll be in touch again once her emotion chatter clears up. And if she doesn't: Well, then, you know what her intent was

 

[zekko]

Without his knowledge and wisdom, I would have emailed her back and asked for forgiveness and gave her anything she wanted to get married

You know, Poon King aside, I don't know of anyone on this forum who would have advised you to do that. In fact, just a casual reading of this forum should be enough to realize that would be a very, very, very bad idea. Not sure why you listened to him and no one else, but at long as you did the right thing.

 

[RalphaWreck]

Send her a text, let her know, you agree to get married, on the condition of a prenup, and get in touch with you if she changes her mind. She'll be in touch again once her emotion chatter clears up. And if she doesn't: Well, then, you know what her intent was

Do this. Don't forget the prenuptial no matter how good the makeup sex is.

 

[Atom Smasher]

This forum should do things like infractions over time like a lot of other forums do.

People who violate rules get infractions on their account. Once you get a certain amount you get banned permanently. That seems like a more fair and just system than just warnings followed by a ban.

That way people see it coming and they know when they are about to reach the limit of infractions.

We do that. All infractions garner points so we can keep track. We also warn relentlessly and inform people where they stand well before we ban.

Now, call me crazy, but what ever happened to the idea of conducting oneself respectfully and not needing to be concerned about reaching a numerical limit? By far, most here are able to do that just fine and their threads don't deteriorate into kindergarten fights.

 

[Bible_Belt]

who else would tell him that his 10 YEAR GF was really only in it for the money? ...I don't even believe this is the actual issue at play, but for the time being he needs to contemplate this potential truth.

Good point. I don't think she was on a ten-year plan to get his money, but the way she turned on him so quickly means there were obviously existing issues that were set off.

Well let me tell you, she absolutely destroyed me in an email, made it extremely personal and told me to go to hell.

I can guarantee you that everything she said in that email - it wasn't the first time she had those thoughts. Long relationships inevitably breed resentment, and she had been holding in those thoughts for a long time. Imagine pre-nups didn't exist, and you had gotten that email from your new wife the first time you pissed her off. It's much better that all of this is happening now.

 

[dude99]

And what do you bet two days before sending the GTH email she was all " i love you and etc and etc. "

Give her the husband she deserves. None.

 

[Glassguy]

I have a very successful and close friend of mine that went through a nasty divorce. 2 kids, multiple successful businesses. He paid his now ex wife $8k a month for 5 yrs. He got through it with plenty of money to spare. Multimillionaire.

He started dating and old flame and she got pregnant. Wanting to do the right thing, he wanted to marry her on his conditons.

Knowing what he went through in his divorce she agreed to a prenup. They live a good lifestyle and she works at part time job to feel like she contributes, but financially it's all him. They are happy together but both know he can walk away and leave her with nothing but monthly child support.

There IS power when a woman knows you can and will walk if you have to do so. A prenuptial is a fair way to do that.

I don't know too many people that would invest everything they had in a company that continues to fail. Too much risk. If you are financially stable on your own, why would you risk it in a marriage when most of them fail as well? It just makes sense. If the woman objects, let her continue her search. It's a fast way to find out where her heart is at.

OP- go no contact. If she realizes what she stands to lose, she will reach out and be ok with it. This isnt a business that you started with her, it's a preexisting family business. You're being a family leader by putting things in place to protect it. Nobody can predict the future but you're doing the right thing by preparing for it.

 

[sazc]

@Trump let me first say that I am devastated for you. Just so sorry that your situation turned out this way.

Did she feel insulted, as if she spent the last 10 years with you, why would she have done that so that she could marry you only to go after your money? Did she feel sucker punched at the idea of a prenup? Did you present it verbally in the best possible manner? Did she understand that the prenup was only for the family company and not for shared earnings during the marriage? Did you place blame on the company lawyer for asking you to do this? Did she assume that it was your intention to leave her high and dry if the marriage didn't work out? Or was she so upset ou didnt get that far?

Did you seek the advice of an attorney before you 'sprang' the idea of a prenup on her?

I ask because attorneys that specialize in these items also specialize in counseling and coaching their clients as to what to say, and how to verbally present it so it has the best possible impact, and how to negotiate without her knowing that you are actually negotiating Sometimes you need to know how to present an idea well, in order to get buy in from the the person.

 

[Trump]

OP- go no contact. If she realizes what she stands to lose, she will reach out and be ok with it. This isnt a business that you started with her, it's a preexisting family business. You're being a family leader by putting things in place to protect it. Nobody can predict the future but you're doing the right thing by preparing for it.

That's my feeling. If she has much of an issue with it, we are not marrying for love and family and kids.

@Trump let me first say that I am devastated for you. Just so sorry that your situation turned out this way.

Did she feel insulted, as if she spent the last 10 years with you, why would she have done that so that she could marry you only to go after your money?

Perhaps. But I don't look at this as my issue.

Did she feel sucker punched at the idea of a prenup?

Possibly. Several years ago I mentioned I wouldn't marry without one. She said 'wow, no girl would marry you.'

Did you present it verbally in the best possible manner?

No I told her over the phone 'Diamond ring OK. Expensive Wedding OK. But you'll have to sign if we divorce you can't come after the Company.'

Did she understand that the prenup was only for the family company and not for shared earnings during the marriage?

If she did, she didn't care by her email.

Did you place blame on the company lawyer for asking you to do this?

This is what's causing me the most grief. I blamed myself instead. I think if I blamed anyone else and she acted this way, I would be maybe 10% disturbed than what I am going through now.

Did she assume that it was your intention to leave her high and dry if the marriage didn't work out? Or was she so upset ou didnt get that far?

Possibly. She asked 'what do I get if we get divorced?'

Did you seek the advice of an attorney before you 'sprang' the idea of a prenup on her?

No but she knows the story why I said it. My brother didn't have one and he killed himself after 3 years of marriage because his wife pressured and intimated him, and hid his prescription pills. His wife was ecstatic when he died. She took all his money, assets, condos, cars, credit cards and clothes. Didn't speak at his funeral and told our family to go to hell. She remarried maybe a few months later with all his money and assets in place.

I'm not going through that.

 

[Glassguy]

One more story. Totally unrelated, but I hope it brings your spirits up.

A couple years ago, I was dating a woman 9 years younger than me. Very short lived, casual dating. Only lasted 5 weeks.

Here is the good part. One day she is on my deck, hacking on her ex-husband, how unfairly he treated her and the kids, etc. I listened, and suggest possible reasons he acted that way and how she might make it better. Next day I get this Text:

Her :"I was really angry yesterday that you didn't support me against XXX. So with all due respect, I am bailing"

Me : "Well, that kinda came out of nowhere. Good luck with your school this fall, and in the future"

and I go totally NON CONTACT.

Then, a week later I decided to ask another girl out and we have been together ever since .

TWO WEEKS after the first girl says "I am bailing" she texts me again, with this:

Her :"How is your sex life?"
Me" Awesome!!! How is yours"

Her: "Terrible, I was hoping you would take pity on me"


Wait for it .........

Me: "I would love to, but I am already dating someone else. Good luck"

My friends,

THAT is the kind of power each and every man here can have, if only they get a fvcking backbone and claim it.

Pity. Such a dirty 4 letter word. One that should never force giving any woman attention because of it.

Pity is just another form of manipulation and trying to break your frame.

Nicely done.

 

[Desdinova]

10 years thrown away just like that.

That cvnt will probably want to come back at some point. Women don't think about the long term, they do things based on how they feel at that particular moment in time. When she's missing you, you're going to get a message. It's likely that you've got a pretty comfy spot on her high score list, so she's not going to forget about you anytime soon. But, you're not at the top of that high score list. If you were, she wouldn't have flushed your relationship down the toilet that quickly.

If you're a smart man, you'll tell her to go to hell when she comes sniffing around again. One chance per lifetime is all anybody should have when it come to 'forever after'. If a woman doesn't realise the great man she has in front of her, then she doesn't fvcking deserve him.

 

[Glassguy]

Fact is, reality hit her in the face. She isn't going to have a guaranteed life of comfort from you financially.

This isn't the 50's and it's not Leave it to Beaver.

It takes 2 incomes nowadays to be comfortable and get ahead for most people. She shouldn't be an exception.

Women want equal rights and a prenup is just that. Do what you're supposed to do and enjoy life with me.....OR...... Fvck up and you're on the streets. Prenups level the playing field.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

Possibly. Several years ago I mentioned I wouldn't marry without one. She said 'wow, no girl would marry you.'

Well that's pretty sh!tty.

Possibly. She asked 'what do I get if we get divorced?'

Ok this is pretty messed up. That means that she actually WANTS something for WHEN she divorces you, not if. That's garbage.

No but she knows the story why I said it. My brother didn't have one and he killed himself after 3 years of marriage because his wife pressured and intimated him, and hid his prescription pills. His wife was ecstatic when he died. She took all his money, assets, condos, cars, credit cards and clothes. Didn't speak at his funeral and told our family to go to hell. She remarried maybe a few months later with all his money and assets in place.

I'm not going through that.

That is so fvcked up, and the fact that she knows that story too and refuses to back down, I was almost gonna say that maybe you should go back to her, but clearly there is stuff that we don't know about that definitely puts us in favor of NC and just entirely forgetting about her. Like the others have said, maybe you should start to look for other women as hard as it may be. It can help take your mind off of her. But tell me though, what is it that made her so valuable to you that you spent 10 years together? And what value did you provide her that made her spend 10 years with you? And was she related to you finding out about SoSuave and other stuff?